Phoebe Grey's Life: College Edition
by Greyfamily6179
Summary: Hi you guys! This is the second part of my story Phoebe Grey's Life. You will have to read Phoebe Grey's Life to understand this part. Thank you all for your support! *COMPLETE*
1. Chapter 1

Chapter 1 of 8

_Phoebe Grey's Life College Edition _

_**(Y'all welcome to your FIRST chapter of our girls college life. I know it is long! Feel free to take a couple of days to read it! Maybe one month a day! The second half should be out in a week or two! These were very time consuming so I will have it out as soon as possible! Pinterest is updated! Leave some reviews!) **_

_**SEPTEMBER**_

College so far has been amazing. Olivia and I have met a bunch of girls and guys that live in our dorm. The guys are on a different floor than us, but still,l they are super cool.

The people I have been hanging out with the most are the girls next to us, Maisy and Reagan. They are super cool and down to go out and stay in like we are. Nathan and I have been talking every night before bed. It sounds like he loves college just as much as I do.

My first class is today. I am using my map trying to figure out where it is. Finally, I walk up to a building that resembles it. I walk in and walk into the room 245B. It's a small lecture hall. This is my English Lit 1001 class. Basically, language arts with classic literature is what I have heard about it.

The room has about 45 people in it. The professor walks in and she is a young redhead. She is very beautiful. I always thought professors had to be old. She looks to be about 30 at most.

"Hello everyone, my name is Professor Angela Rook. Welcome to intro to psychology. Some of you may be here because you want to be psychologist some of you this may be a required course, either way, I want you taking it seriously. You can find my syllabus on my website which is written out on the board. Let's begin," intro to psychology what? Oh my gosh. I am supposed to be in 245 C not B. Crap how do I get out of here? There aren't enough people to just leave. Well, shoot. Looks like I am staying in intro to psychology.

"Here you can borrow some of my paper," a girl says next to me and hands me plenty of notebook paper for notes.

"Thank you so much, I am Phoebe," I say.

"Lyla nice to meet you," she says and I smile.

I turn my attention to the board listen as the professor talks about brain development and such. It's actually quite fascinating. I find myself taking notes and learning about the brain.

"Who can tell me what the amygdala is?" I hear the professor say. I raise my hand not even intentionally, but I know the answer.

"The part of the brain that deals with emotion, survival, instincts, and memory," I say.

"Very good, Ms….." she asks waiting for my name.

"Grey, Phoebe Grey," I say and she nods giving me a small smile.

I continue to take notes and engage in the class for the full two hours. I end up having 5 full pages of notes. In the end, as I walk out I realize that this isn't even my class. What the hell, Phoebe? I really enjoyed psychology I guess.

I walk out not really knowing what to think. I head back to my dorm and find Olivia taking a nap on the couch. I smile and decide to follow her lead. I climb up on my bed and lay down. Next thing I know I am asleep.

—-

The next week of class I go into my actual class. English Lit 1001 a large part of me wants to be an intro to psychology, but that isn't my major. I walk into the larger lecture hall and sit down. There are probably close to 200 people in here. I am tempted to go back to psychology.

The professor does not even say good morning before he is going into a lecture. He says we will need the book Wuthering Heights. Sounds so fun. I see people around me smiling when he says that. Why am I not smiling?

As the lecture goes on I find myself bored to tears. As the class ends I realize I need to do something about this. Am I in the right major? I mean this is what I came to school here for.

I walk out of the class knowing who I need to talk to. I grab a coffee on my way out of the building and head back to my room. Olivia is at office hours for her class so I have the room to myself. I dial the number and wait.

"Bee? Hey, baby what's up?" Nathan asks. It's so good to hear his voice.

"Hi babe, do you have a couple of minutes to talk?" I ask.

"I'll always have time for you. Is everything okay?" He asks making me smile.

"Yeah yeah, I just Well it's kind of a long story," I say.

"Like I said I always have time for you, what's going on?" He asks. Oh, this boy.

"Well, so on my first day of English lit class I walked into the wrong classroom. I was supposed to be in 245C but I went into 245B and it ended up being an intro to psychology class and I wanted to leave but I felt awkward leaving that early so I stayed and ended up really liking the class and I want to go back. I even met a friend who gave me a notebook paper named Lyla. But today I went to my usual English lit class and I realized I hate English Lit. The professor who didn't introduce himself told us we had to read Wuthering Heights and that sounds horrible but everyone around me got so excited and I think I'm in the wrong major," I spit out in one long second with no pauses.

"Bee, take a deep breath," he says first. I do as he says and lay back on my bed.

"Okay first off, I miss you so much it. Two, Bee it sounds like you really enjoyed psychology. To be honest, you never enjoyed language arts. Psychology does seem like a good fit for you because you love working with people and helping people. I am not trying to talk you out of it. I want you to do what makes you the happiest," he says and I smile.

"You are right. I never did like it. I was thinking all along who I would choose something that I didn't really love. I guess I just thought it would make my mom proud," I admit. I have never admitted that to anyone except myself.

"Bee, you and I both know you could be anything your mom would be proud of you. You need to do what makes you happy not anyone else," he says and I nod.

"You are right, I am going to talk to my counselor about it. Anyway, how are you?" I ask.

"I am good, busy week for basketball we are getting uniforms and doing pictures," he says.

"You'll have to send me yours," I smile.

"Maybe. What's up with you?" He asks. M

"Well I start rushing next week," I say and I hear a sigh. My parents and Nathan didn't love the idea of me being in a sorority, but I think it sounds fun. If I don't like it I can always drop it.

"Just be careful okay. Don't let anyone haze you or push you around," He says and I smile.

"You sound like my dad," I say and he laughs.

"You know how to flatter a man, Phoebe Grey," He says and I smile.

"Look Olivia just got back so I have to go, but I love you," I say.

"I love you the most," he says. We hang up and Olivia sets her stuff down.

"Was that the man of the year?" She asks and I nod smiling.

"Aw, give him my best. So what are we doing tonight? I was thinking we could go to Tai's and get Chinese then watch The Bachelorette?" She says.

"Oh nothing sounds better," I smile and she laughs.

"Let's go, PG," she says using her nickname for me.

—-

"I can't move," I laugh as Olivia is facedown on her bed still in her rush clothes. Today was the last day of rush. Tomorrow we go and find out what sorority we are in.

I kick off my shoes and lay on my bed. "I can't walk around anymore or talk to anyone," I say and she laughs.

"You're telling me, sister," she says and I smile.

"What sorority do you want?" She asks.

"I loved the girls at sigma kappa, but I also really like the girls at Kappa Delta, so either of those. What about you?" I ask.

"Kappa Delta, or Delta Zeta," she says and I nod. I didn't like Delta Zeta that much but whatever makes her the happiest.

"I am so tired, I am heading to bed," I say as I change into my pajamas.

"Me too, goodnight sister," she says and I smile as I lay in bed. It takes nothing for me to fall asleep.

I wake up to the sound of my alarm. "I don't even need to be in a sorority," I hear Olivia say and I laugh.

"Come on get up. What are you wearing?" I ask her.

"The blue dress you borrowed when we went to Kyle's friends' house," she says and I nod. I get it out of my closet and pass it to her.

"What about you?" She asks. I show her a pink dress with spaghetti straps.

"Cute PG," she says and I smile.

"Hey girls parties here," Maisy says walking in. I laugh as she sits down and starts doing her makeup.

"Phoebe where is the stereo it's too quiet in here," Maisy says and I point to the speaker. She plugs her phone in and starts playing "cross your mind" by Sabrina Claudio.

"I love this song," Olivia says as the girl starts singing.

We do our hair and makeup listening to Maisy's music. I do a light look and curl my hair. Olivia always does her makeup way more full out then I do. I just don't have the patience for all that.

When we are finally dressed and ready we head out. We head to the place where they give us our letters. Everyone is supposed to open them together then you run to your sorority.

"Phoebe Grey," I tell the obviously fake blonde.

"Here you are, Phoebe," she says. I take my envelope and hold it tightly. Olivia and Maisy get theirs too. We walk out to where all the freshman are standing and finally the Greek life president comes on a microphone.

"Okay ladies. You may open your letters in 3….2...1," everyone rips theirs open. I open mine to find Sigma Kappa. I look over at Olivia and she holds up Delta Zeta. I smile and hug her.

"Phoebe I got Sig Kap too," Maisy says and I hug her. We bid Olivia goodbye and run to our huge sorority house. Everyone is hugging everyone.

"Welcome home baby Kappa's," the president says.

Everyone goes inside and there is lots of alcohol waiting for us. I take a glass of champagne they have sitting out and go around talking to everyone. Finally, I see a girl I recognize.

"Lyla hey," I smile. The girl from psychology class.

"Oh my gosh, hi. Are you in Sigma Kappa?" She asks and I nod smiling.

"Oh good I know one person," she smiles. "You weren't in psych last week or this past week, where have you been?" She asks. I sip my champagne down and set it down.

"I was actually in the wrong class that day. I was supposed to be in 245 C not B," I say and she frowns.

"So you're not coming back," she says.

"Well, actually I may be switching my major. I really liked psych a lot. English lit isn't feeling like a good fit for me anymore," I say and she smiles.

"You raised your hand on the first day of class, I can't believe it wasn't even your class. You should definitely be a psych major. You can do so many things with it, work with kids, adults, at schools, even in hospitals," she says and I nod.

"You make a very good point," I say and she shrugs.

"I'm just saying I think you'd be killer at it," she says and I thank her.

"Why don't we go drink some more," she suggests and I nod.

"For sure," I smile. We head over to the alcohol table and I grab another glass of champagne. I don't know who is refilling the glasses but I hope they don't stop.

I walk around talking to everyone and anyone. All the girls here are so nice. I can't wait to be initiated into the sorority and get a big.

Maisy and I stay super late. We leave at around 1:30 am to walk back to our dorm. I am super buzzed and Maisy is too. We are holding hands laughing as we walk.

"Holy shit is this us?" She asks and I shrug.

"Uhhhh Brody dorms, yeah that's us," I smile. We go up to the fourth floor and walk to our rooms. I have to help Maisy put her key in and then I go into my room.

I take off my makeup and lay in bed. I am drunker than I thought I was. I fall asleep pretty quickly hoping not to wake up with a hangover.

—

"Phoebe Grey," the receptionist calls my name in the college counseling center office.

Today is the day I am finally doing it. I am switching my major to psychology after I talked to Lyla last week I decided that I should go for it and switch my major. I have always loved working with kids, so I am leaning towards child psychology.

"Hi Ms. Grey, how can I help you today?" My college counselor asks.

"Hi there, I am here to switch my major," I say.

"Oh well let me pull up your profile," He says and I wait until he looks at me to elaborate.

"Well, I am an English lit major right now and I just don't think it is a good fit for me. As much as I love getting to learn about English I think there is more out there for me. So I am going to switch to psychology," I say.

"Okay so I will print your new schedule with your classes for psychology," he says and grabs the sheet that just printed. He hands it to me and asks if I need anything else.

"That's it, thank you so much," I say and he shows me out. That was way easier than I thought it would be. Wow. I still have yet to talk to my parents. I thought I should do it first which I guess wasn't the best idea now that I think about it.

I head back to my dorm and call my mom. She answers pretty quickly. "Hey honey, how are you?" She asks.

"I am great how are you?" I ask.

"Better now that I am talking to you. I am so happy that you are happy with your sorority. When dad saw the pictures of you with the girls from the sorority I think it eased his mind a little," she says and I smile.

"That makes me happy. Anyway, do you have a minute to talk?" I ask her.

"I do, what's up sweets?" She asks.

"Well, I um I uh umm I changed my major," I spit out.

"You did? That's okay sweetie, what did you change it to?" She asks.

"Wait you're not mad?" I ask.

"Why would I be mad?" She asks.

"I don't know, because you were an English lit major," I say and she chuckles.

"Phoebe, just because I was English lit doesn't mean you have to be. You need to do what interests you not what you think I want you to do," she says.

"I don't know…. I just thought…. you were so proud of me when I told you. I didn't want to disappoint you," I admit.

"Phoebe girl, you could never disappoint me. I am so proud of the person you are. So tell me what is the new major?" She asks.

"Psychology," I say.

"Oh Phoebe that's great, I am so happy for you," she says.

"You are?" I ask.

"Of course I am. You found something that really interests you," she says and I smile.

"I love you so much, Mom," I say.

"I love you more, my darling," she says.

"I'm going to call dad and tell him now," I say and she bids me goodbye.

I sigh and grab my daddy bear. I rub its little face. I miss my parents a lot. It is always so good to talk to them. But I still have one more parent to admit that I changed my major to. I dial his number and wait.

"Bubs, how are you baby?" My dad asks as he answers the phone.

"I am great, how are you?" I ask him.

"Missing you as usual, but it makes me happy that you are so good," he says.

"I am, do you have a minute to talk?" I ask him.

"Always for you. Is everything okay my Bubs?" He asks.

"Yeah yeah everything is fine it's just that, well I changed my major," I say. It's easier if I just spit it out. He is quiet for a minute and finally, he talks.

"What made you decide to do that?" He asks.

I tell him the story about how I walked into the wrong class. I tell him how I really don't like English lit and don't think it is for me. He listens to everything I have to say before he talks.

"Bubs, if that is what makes you happy then, by all means, do it," he says and it's like a weight off my chest.

"Really, you mean it," I ask.

"Of course I do. I will always support you Bubs," he says and I smile.

"I miss you," I say as I stroke my daddy bear.

"I miss you the most Bubs, but I am so happy you love school," he says.

"I really do love it," I say.

"I really love you," He says and I smile.

We bid goodbye and I hang up the phone. This month has been the craziest but also one of the most fun months of my life. I love it here and wouldn't wish for anything more.

_**OCTOBER**_

I am headed to my psych class right now. Last week I changed my major for good. I walk in and sit down next to Lyla. "You changed your major?" She asks smiling.

"Yep, I did last week," I say and she smiles.

"Oh good, I finally have a friend in class," she smiles. "Are you excited to find out who your big is next week?" She asks and I nod.

"So excited, I think they start dropping hints off this week," I say and she nods.

"Good morning, get out your notes and let's begin," the beautiful redhead I remember says.

She starts teaching and I start taking notes. This class is so fascinating. Tomorrow I have my next class which is abnormal/health psychology. I am very intrigued as to what that is.

Her lecture goes on for two hours. After she finishes teaching she reminds us that her office hours are straight after this class in this room. I decide that I am going to stay and catch up on what I missed from the past two weeks.

Students file out and I head up closer to the front. I get out my laptop and read over her syllabus. I see that she had a paper due last week. I need to ask about that since I wasn't in this major.

"You're back, Ms. grey," She says and I look up. How did she remember my name?

"Yes, I actually wasn't supposed to be in your class on the first day. But I fell in love with the subject and switched my major," I say and she smiles.

"It's kids like you that make me love my job, I remember you from the first day. Nobody raises their hand on the first day. And you weren't even supposed to be in this class. It's impressive," she says and I smile.

"Thank you, I really enjoy it here," I say and she smiles.

"So tell me, where do you want psychology to take you?" She asks me.

"As of now I am not 100% sure, but I am thinking child psychology," I say.

"You seem like you would be good with that, I assume your counselor has put you in all the required classes?" She asks and I nod.

"Is there anything I can help you with?" She says.

"Well you did have a paper due last week and I wasn't in the class, so I was wondering what I should do about that," I say.

"Don't worry about it, you're are in the class now and we have another paper due by next class so just work on that one," she says.

"Oh thank you so much," I say and she nods smiling.

"Well if that is all I have a meeting to get to," she says and I bid her goodbye before walking out myself.

I head back to my dorm room and walk inside. On my bed are painted sigma kappa letters and a bunch of candy. The gift bringing begins.

"Did you see who dropped it off?" I ask Olivia and she smiles shrugging.

"I can't tell you," she says and I throw a pillow at her.

"I hate you," I say.

"Hey it's a surprise, buttface," she says and I smile.

I put the sorority letters on my desk. They are black and fade into a sparkly ombré. It's super cool. "So how is Delta Zeta treating you?" I ask her as I open a bag of starbursts.

"It's good, really good, I found that by our door after I came back from class," she says and points to the delta zeta white and gold water bottle.

"That's so cute," I say and she smiles.

"So how's your man?" She asks. I look over at her smiling. I sit on the couch in our room.

"Umm, he's great. He didn't answer my phone call last night but we have been texting today. I think the basketball boys took him out last night," I say smiling.

"Drunk Nathan is the best, I am surprised he didn't call you saying how much he loved you," she says and I laugh. Nathan does get very lovey when he's drunk.

"Has he always been like that?" I ask her.

"Ever since we starting drinking in high school, he was always the nicest guy out of the group. Even in his man Whore face," she says making me laugh.

"He's the best. If I do say so myself," I say and she smiles.

"How long have you guys been dating?" She asks.

"2 years next month," I say and she smiles.

"Dang, that's a lot," she says.

"It doesn't feel like it though, every time we are with each other it's like the first time. Not to be too cheesy," I say.

"So cheesy but so cute, I love that for you grey," she says making me smile.

There is a knock on our door and Regan and Maisy walk in. "Hey ladies," Regan says sitting next to me on our couch. Maisy plops herself on my bed. She is wearing a Sig Kap shirt.

"What's up, guys?" I ask.

"We were bored so we came on over," Maisy says.

"Phoebe I heard you switched your major," Regan says.

"Yep, I'm a psych major now," I say.

"Oh dope, didn't you say your brother's girlfriend is a psych major?" Maisy says.

"Yes, but she wants to go into clinical psychology with adults," I say. They nod and we sit in comfortable silence before there is a knock on our door.

I open it to find a package addressed to me. "Another one for you?" Olivia asks and I nod.

I open it up and find it is from The Cruz's. My heart. I find a card and a picture inside the card. The card says

Dear Bee Bee,

We miss you so much. It is not the same without you here. We have a countdown in our playroom of how long till you come home. Drew started pulling himself up on his crib and can stand when he is holding onto something. Spencer started preschool and loves it. She brought in a picture of you for her show and tell. Quinn started kindergarten and absolutely loves it. He says he is a very good boy for his teacher like you told him to be. Charlie is in second grade and can now read a book all by himself without help. Mr. And Mrs. Cruz are missing you almost as much as the kids are. We put some stuff in here from each kiddo. Drew gave you a Starbucks gift card for all times he wiped you out. Spencer and Grandma made chocolate chip cookies for you! Homemade! Quinn put in a drawing he made and an essential oil diffuser. We have started using these with the kids and they help with sleep, anxiety, and mood. He put in some of his favorite oils! Finally, Charlie put in a 4-foot long charger cord, because your mom was telling his mom that you aren't allowed to have extension cords in the dorms! We love you so much Bee, and can't wait for you to come home and see us!

XO The Cruz Kids

My whole entire heart just melted. Each kiddo signed it and Drew's footprint is on it. I can't wait to go home.

"Are those from the kids you babysit?" Olivia asks. I nod smiling.

"Can I try a chocolate chip cookie?" Regan asks eyeing the container. I laugh and nod passing her one.

"Holy shit these are so good," she says and I laugh trying one. They taste just like home.

"You're so lucky to have a family like this," Maisy says.

"I know I am," I say smiling.

—

Today is the day we find out who is big is and get to have our first real party. We are going to the frat down the street from us for the party. It's going to be so fun.

Right now I am sitting at my desk doing my makeup and hair. Olivia had to leave an hour ago for her party so it's just me. All of a sudden my phone starts to ring. I see it is a FaceTime from Nathan.

"Hi baby," I smile as I answer.

"Hi my girl, what are you up to?" He asks as I put on my foundation.

"Umm not much, I am just putting on my makeup. Tonight's the night that I find out who my big is," I say smiling.

"Oh, that's so fun, Bee. Do you guys have a big sleepover or something?" He asks making me laugh.

"Something like that yeah," I say and he shakes his head.

"What is it?" He asks.

"Well we go to the sorority house wearing the T-shirt our big left us and you find your matching T-shirt and that's your big. After we go to Fiji and party there," I say. He sighs and rubs his face.

"Fiji as in the fraternity," he says.

"Yes," I say as I do my eyeshadow.

"That makes me nervous," he says and I stop and look at him.

"Babe I only have eyes for you," I say and he smiles.

"I know that, but I think every guy in that fraternity will have their eyes on you," he says and I shake my head.

"You don't know how hot you are, do you?" He asks and I shake my head.

"No one will be looking at me, trust me," I say. He frowns and I can tell he isn't happy.

"Babe I promise you, it's only you," I say and he gives me a half smile.

"Just keep me updated, so I know nobody has date rape drugged you, or you are not too drunk," he says and I frown.

"I wish you would just trust me," I say and he frowns.

"I do trust you, it's other people I don't trust," I sigh.

"Nathan I love you, but this isn't going to be my only party. I'm sure you have gone out and I trust you that you won't make any stupid decisions," I say.

"I know baby. I'm sorry I guess I'm just having trouble with the thought of you going out without me there to watch over you," He says and I give him a sad smile.

"I'm a big girl Nathan, I promise I will be okay," I say. "I'll text you and keep you updated okay?" I compromise.

"Okay," He says as I start my hair.

"You look very beautiful," he says and I smile.

"You flatter me, Nathan Moore," I say and he smirks.

"Are you going to curl your hair?" He asks as I unwrap my curling iron.

"Nope this is my dildo," I tease and he looks shocked at my joke.

"Don't even tease me like that baby, I'm dying over here without you," He says and I smile.

"Join the club, Mister," I say and he smiles.

"Hey I tried to have phone sex with you and you just kept laughing," he says and I blush and start laughing again.

"How does anyone think that's hot?" I say giggling and he shakes his head.

"You kill me," He says as I make my hair into beach waves.

"I'm not trying to," I say and he shakes his head.

"Uh huh," he smirks.

"Okay I need to get dressed," I say about to hang up.

"Let me watch," He says and I shake my head.

"No that's so…" I can't even think of the word.

"It's nothing I haven't seen before," he says and I shake my head.

"I don't know," I say.

"Come on baby," He says and I smile.

"Fine," I say.

I stand up and grab my shirt and shorts. I slip off my robe so I am left in nothing but black lace panties.

"Fuck," He says and I smirk. I put on my bra that clips in the front. I slip on my shorts and wink at him then put on my shirt.

"Happy?" I ask. He flips the camera and shows me his pants.

"What do you think?" He asks and I giggle.

"I wish I was there, baby," I say and he smiles.

"I do too, have fun tonight. I love you so much," he says and I smile.

"I love you too," I say before hanging up.

I put on my shoes and grab my boat before heading out. I walk to the sorority house and see Maisy in the front yard. She comes and grabs me giving me a hug.

"Come on PG," she says and I smile. That's my new nickname I guess. We both get a drink and sit down with Lyla and her friend.

"Okay okay, girls," the president named Lydia says.

We all listen up and she starts explaining how this is going to go down. Apparently, we are all going into the basement of the sorority house and running around until we find our big.

"Okay ladies… go," she yells and I take Maisy's hand running to the basement.

We go down there and it is a frenzy of people and lots of alcohol. All the shirt designs are so cute, but I can't find the girl who has mine. I keep running around until finally, I find the big with my matching white crop top sigma kappa shirt.

"Phoebe," she runs to me and gives me a huge hug. It's Caroline, she is the funniest and craziest girl I know. She is a sophomore here.

"Oh my gosh, I had no idea you were my big," I say and she laughs.

"I know, such a hard secret to keep. Okay my job is to get you drunk before we go to Fiji," She says and I laugh.

We go to the alcohol table and she makes me a drink. "Okay my little, chug it," she says and I laugh.

"I wish I was joking," she says laughing and I smirk. She counts down and I start chugging the drink. I finish my drink and she laughs.

"Damn I picked good, Okay Pheebs we have to ice all of you," she says and I shake my head. She hands me a Smirnoff Ice. I get down on one knee and start chugging it.

"Goooooood," she laughs. I am already starting to feel it. We go on to do shots together and then get lots of big little pictures.

"Okay, little we are going to Fiji. Stay with your bigs," someone calls out. Caroline grabs my hand and we head down the street.

We are walking and I am so hammered. Caroline and I are laughing about lord knows what. We get to the frat house and go inside. This is way different then I imagined. There is loud music and alcohol everywhere.

"Carol, is this your little?" A guy older than me comes up and kisses Caroline on the cheek.

"Yeah, this is Phoebe Grey, she's pretty cute right," she says and wraps her arm around me. He leans in giving me a hug.

"I'm Josh, I am the president of Fiji, you got a wild one, Phoebe. You're a freshman?" he says motioning to Caroline. She laughs and tells him to shut up. I know Caroline is wild she has quite the reputation of partying.

"Yes, I'm in the psych program," I say and smile. He nods and gives me an odd look. It's one that Ryan Malford used to give me.

"Hey I gotta go get my pledges in line, but Phoebe let me know if you need anything," He says and kisses my cheek then squeezes Caroline's shoulder.

"Look at you, Grey you are making moves with these frat boys," she says and I shake my head.

"Boyfriend remember," I say and she nods.

"Oh I know, but hey you can always live a little right?" She asks and I nod.

With that, we go around talking to everyone. All the frat guys are so flirty with us, but a lot of them are super nice. I like this frat. Caroline keeps me with her all night. I keep drinking and getting drunker by the second.

Caroline takes me to pee. I go in first and use the bathroom when she goes in. It was disgusting in there. Boys are so gross. Not my boy. Shit, I haven't texted Nathan.

"Hey Grey," I look up and see Josh the guy from earlier walking towards me.

"Don't have your bodyguard with you anymore?" He asks talking about Caroline.

"Uhm no she is peeing," I say then laugh at my use of the word peeing.

"Damn you are cute," He says and I get uncomfortable.

"Was that too forward?" He asks and I smile.

"No it's just I have a boyfriend," I say. We have to talk into each other's ear because the music is so loud.

"Oh really? Where?" He asks.

"Princeton," I say and he smiles shaking his head.

"Ivy League huh?" He says and I smile.

"I guess so," I say.

"Well hey, I have lots of pledges that would love to get with you. Some have even come up and asked who big Carol's little was. So if you need someone I can hook you up," he says. What the fuck?

"Josh, get away from my little," Caroline comes out and says.

"Shit busted, remember what I said, Grey," he says and I nod.

"Fucking prick," she says and I shake my head laughing.

"Let's go dance," she says and I smile putting my phone away. We listen to a lot of music dancing. We find Maisy and her big Alex and dance with them. It is so much fun here.

I look at Maisy's phone and see it is 3:30 am. Shit, it's so late. Caroline comes up to me and grabs my hand. "Party is winding down, do you wanna go back to your dorm or go to the annex?" She asks. The annex is where a bunch of girls from sigma kappa live together.

"I need to go to my dorm, I am so drunk," I laugh.

"Okay I'll get a sober pledge," she says and takes my hand. She goes up and says something to Josh and his friend. We head upstairs and I sit in a chair. I don't know if I've ever been this drunk.

A girl I know as Jacquelin comes and sits down next to me. "Grey what the fuck is up," she says and gives me a hug. She is a junior in college.

"I'm just really drunk waiting for a sober something to take me home," I laugh and she laughs with me.

"Damn girl, didn't know you had it in you. These sober pledges crack me up. They are freshmen that are like babysitters for the drunk girls," she says and I laugh.

Maisy, Josh, and a really hot guy not as hot as Nathan though walk up to us. "Okay Phoebe, this is your sober pledge, Andrew, who is going to walk you home. I gave him your dorm and room number and all that shit. Remember pledge if you fuck up you're out," Josh says as he fist bumps the kid. I give Jacquelin and Caroline hugs before heading out.

Andrew and I start walking. When we get outside I realize how freezing I am. "Here," Andrew says and hands me his jacket. I struggle to put it on and he laughs helping me.

"I'm Phoebe Grey, by the way. Sorry, we have to meet this way," I say feeling the warmth of his jacket.

"Andrew Thomas," He says and I smile.

"So why are you in charge of walking me home. Besides the fact that I am hammered?" I ask Making him laugh.

"You are funny, Phoebe. To get into the fraternity since they aren't allowed to haze us they make us do shitty jobs like clean up after parties, and walk drunk girls home," he says and I frown.

"So this is shitty for you?" I ask.

"I didn't mean it like that, but would I rather be as drunk as you are right now? Absolutely," he says and I nod.

"I get that when are you done with the shit jobs?" I ask.

"Whenever, Josh says. He likes me so I think I am done after Halloween," he says.

"Cool, well thanks for walking me home," I say.

"Anytime, so tell me about you," he says and I smile.

"Well I am originally from Seattle, I grew up on the sound. I went to high school at Seattle Prep and that's where I met my boyfriend who now goes to Princeton and is on the basketball team. What about you?" I say.

"Oh dope, well I am from Portland Oregon. I went to Greensburg High School. No girlfriend or anything exciting like that. I am on the lacrosse team here," he says and I nod.

"That's so cool," I say.

"Well, this is me," I say and he nods.

"I know, technically I have to walk you to your door," he says.

"Right, well come on in," I say trying to swipe my key card.

"Here," He says and does it. My key card was upside down. We go inside and head up to the fourth floor. He walks me to my door and helps me open it.

"Thank you so much, so do I like tip you or anything?" I ask laughing. He starts laughing really hard.

"You're funny, Grey. I'll see you around," he says shutting my door. I climb up on my end. Well, I made a new friend tonight. I end up going to bed still in my clothes and makeup. Drunk doesn't even begin to describe how I am right now.

—-

It's been a week since the frat party. Nathan has been completely ignoring me. He will respond to my texts but in one-word answers. He is so annoying. I keep asking him what is wrong and he doesn't respond.

I am in psych right now taking a test. I finish it easily and turn it in. I am usually the first person done in the room. Given there are only 50 people in the class. I sigh and get on my phone. I decide to text Nathan.

*Any chance we can talk tonight? I am worried.*

I put my phone down and look at the clock in fifteen minutes I can leave. I keep checking my phone and seeing if he has responded. Every time I have tried to call him he declines it. I don't know what I did wrong.

Finally, the class is over. I grab my bag and head to my dorm. Olivia is at her cousin's wedding this weekend so it is just me. I look down at my phone and see Nathan responded to my text. Finally.

*Call at 8 your time.*

I guess it is better than nothing. I just want to know why he is so mad at me. I lay on my bed and decide to just watch Netflix. I put on the show "You" It is about a creepy stalker guy. Very good in my opinion.

Hours pass and finally it is 7:55. I brush my hair and braid it to the side in case he wants to FaceTime. Finally, I hit the call button. Shit shit shit.

"Hi," I say sheepishly as he answers.

"Hi Phoebe," he says.

"How are you?" I ask.

"I've been better," he says. It's silent for a moment and I just decide to come out with it.

"Why have you been ignoring me. I have been trying to call you for days on end. I text you and you respond yes or no or even not at all. I have been worried sick all week. What is going on?" I ask. Nathan sighs and I can picture him rubbing his hand over his face.

"Phoebe, where were you last weekend?" He asks.

"I told you a frat party," I say.

"And what did you promise me before you left?" He asks. Oh my gosh. I didn't text him that night at all. I totally forgot.

"Nathan I-" I am cut off by him.

"No Phoebe, I don't want to hear it. I was worried sick about you all night. You and I both know what you have been through when it comes to guys taking advantage of you. And this time I am not a phone call or a couple of feet away if you get taken. I can't get to you as quick as I was able to in Seattle or Florida. You promised me you would text me and when you didn't my mind was going everywhere. I couldn't sleep I sat and stared at my phone," he raises his voice.

"Nathan, I… I am so sorry. I know that does nothing for the situation, but I need you to know. I am so sorry and I feel horrible. I never meant to leave you out of the loop. I just was so caught up in everything that was happening here," I say.

"Phoebe, what am I going to do? That night was so stressful," he says and I start to tear up.

"Nathan, please don't break up with me," and as I say it tears stream down my face.

"When did I say I was going to break up with you? You asked me to trust you, Phoebe and I am trying. But that goes both ways. I need you to trust that just because I am upset with you doesn't mean we are breaking up. Couples fight, Phoebe," he says and I wipe my eyes.

"I know, it's just I hate fighting with you," I say.

"I hate fighting with you too, but sometimes we disagree on things," he says.

"I'm sorry," I say. He sighs and my heart hurts for him.

"Please just don't do it again Bee," He says and when he calls me Bee I know all is okay in the world again.

"I love you," I say.

"I love you more," he says.

—-

Tonight is Halloween, one of the best nights of the year. Nathan and I already have an agreement that since we are both going out, we will just talk in the morning. For Halloween, I am going to Fiji with the Sig Kap girls. We got initiated this past weekend. I am not allowed to talk about anything that happened. But I am now officially apart of sigma kappa.

"Okay your hair is done," Teagan, our other neighbor from down the hall says. She did my hair in space buns then curled the rest.

"You are a miracle worker," I say and she smiles.

"I wouldn't go that far," she says and I smile.

"What are you being?" I ask her.

"A Dalmatian and Tristan are being a firefighter," she says about her boyfriend.

"That's so cute, I wish Nathan was here to celebrate," I say and she nods.

"You'll see him next month," she says and I nod. We bid each other goodbye and I put on my costume. It is a silver onesie that is low cut. I put a cool metallic tattoo sticker on my chest so you can see it. I then slip on my short metallic purple shorts over. I do my alien dots and there you have it. I am a space girl. Not original at all but so cute. Caroline and I are being it together.

I grab my metallic jacket and slip it on for the walk. Maisy meets me at the end of the hallway in her Girl Scout costume. She is in a skin-tight tan skirt and a white crop top with a sash and a bow in her hair.

"Damn girl," she says to me and I shake my head.

"Speak for yourself," I say and we laugh heading out. We get to the frat house and both of our bigs are waiting for us. After a bazillion pictures, we head inside.

I get a mike's hard and start drinking. It is so good. The music is loud and Caroline and I are dancing to the beat. I feel myself being watched but continue to drink more anyway. As I grab another drink I find a senior in our sorority getting one too.

"Phoebe right?" She asks.

"I'm Claire, how is sorority life so far?" She asks as she takes a sip of her drink.

"Good, I love it and my big," I say and she smiles.

"Sigma Kappa is the best. You picked right," she says and I smile.

"I know I did. I am so happy," I say.

"Good, let's go do shots and find Caroline," she says and I follow her smiling. Everyone here is so nice. We go to the built-in bar and do a shit ton of tequila shots. I go back to drinking my vodka lemonade.

"Fuck I'm drunk," I say and Caroline and Claire laugh.

"You are the best, Grey," she says and I smile. We get pictures of us that I probably look horrendous in, but hey it's for the memories.

We keep drinking the night away and having so much fun. I am on the dance floor and my eyes meet familiar brown ones. I smile and walk over.

"Andrew Thomas, we meet again," I smile.

"Phoebe Grey, we meet again and you're still drunk," he says making me laugh.

"I know I'm sorry, we need to meet sober," I say and he smiles.

"It's okay, I find it entertaining," he says.

"I thought I saw you going to class," he says.

"Really why didn't you say hi?" I ask.

"You looked pretty upset, it was last week," he says. I nod it was probably the day that Nathan and I talked.

"Oh I know the day you are talking about, my boyfriend was mad at me," I say and he frowns.

"Why?" He asks. It's so loud in here I can barely think.

"Long story," I say taking another shot.

"Can I walk you home tonight, if you don't sleep at the annex? You're a little drunker than two weeks ago. Maybe you should take a break from the alcohol," he says.

"I don't need to, buddy I am good," I say and laugh. "But you can walk me home because I wanna sleep in my bed," I say and stumble a bit.

"Damn you're hammered, Grey," Maisy walks up and says. She is pretty drunk herself. She is with a guy wearing the same shirt as Andrew so I am guessing he is a sober monitor.

"Yeah She is hammered, I was talking about getting her home safely," Andrew says.

"More like get her home and bang her. Her body is out of this world," the guy Maisy is with says talking about my alien costume. I am shocked.

"Get the fuck out of here, Michael, she has a boyfriend and is drunk," Andrew says defending me. Suddenly I am uncomfortable with this Michael kid.

"I'm going to head home, Mase," I say using Maisy's nickname.

"Okay girl, text me when you are there," she says and I start walking out. I say goodbye to Claire and Caroline and I hear them tell someone to get me home safe. I walk out of the frat house and start picking up speed. I just wish Nathan was here. Tears roll down my face.

"Phoebe, stop," I hear Andrew's voice. I don't stop and finally, he grabs my arm turning me towards him.

"I am fine, please just let me go. I am not interested in you. I have a boyfriend," I say. Andrew shakes his head.

"Phoebe, I hate to break it to you, but I'm not trying to get with you. You seem cool and Michael was way out of line. Trust me, when I say this I want to be friends, not anything more. Now let me walk you home and make sure you get there safe," he says and hooks my arm around his. I feel like an idiot now.

"I'm sorry I snapped at you," I say.

"It's understandable, Michael is a creep," he says and I laugh.

"So tell me why the tears?" He asks.

"I just miss Nathan," I say and just as I say that my phone starts to ring. I stumble a bit as I dig through my bag. Andrew grabs my phone out of my front pocket and shows me Nathan is calling.

"Fuck fuck what do I do. Don't answer," I say. The phone keeps ringing until it goes to voicemail.

"Ah finally-" I am cut off by Nathan calling again.

"You need to answer he is obviously worried," he says and I shake my head. Here goes nothing, I answer the phone.

"Hi Nathan," I say sheepishly.

"Bee, how is your night? Why do you sound like you've been crying?" He asks. Tears fall out of my eyes.

"It's been good, I just miss you," I say. He sighs and I tear up more.

"Oh baby, I miss you too. Where are you?" He asks.

"Walking home," I say.

"By yourself?" He asks.

"No, Sawyer is following me somehow and someway and Andrew," I say slurring my words a bit.

"Phoebe, who is Andrew?" He asks.

"He is a sober monitor, and he's I'm sorry I should have had a girl walk me home," I cry drunkenly. I look to Andrew and he sighs. He takes the phone from my hands as I wipe my eyes.

"Hey man, this is Andrew Thomas. I am a pledge at Fiji and am a sober monitor for the night. I am not trying to get with your girl in the slightest. I have walked her home a couple of times. We are just friends nothing more I would never do that to another guy. It happened to me when I was in high school, trust me, man, I like Phoebe a lot. She is very funny, we are nothing more than friends," he says. I don't Hear Nathan's response, but I am hoping it is good. I watch as Andrew laughs and it makes me feel better.

"Yeah I'll text you my number off her phone, Okay man here she is," he says and passes me the phone.

"Baby?" Nathan asks.

"Yeah?" I say.

"Stay with Andrew and let him walk you home, Okay my love?" He says.

"Yes, I love you," I say.

"I love you more," He says and we hang up. Andrew takes the phone and texts him his number then puts my phone in my bag.

"Okay Ms. out of this world this is you," he says as we get to my door.

"Thank you… for everything Andrew," I say and give him a hug. He smiles and pats my back.

"Take some Advil and get some rest. Your boyfriend and you both now have my number. Maybe as friends we could get lunch sober," he says emphasizing friends and sober.

"I would like that, thank you, Andrew," I say and he smiles. I head inside and lay on my bed out for the night. Halloween was a wild one.

_**NOVEMBER **_

It's the first week of November. In two week I get to see my boy. I am so excited. It can't come soon enough. But for today I keeping up on my promise to Andrew and we are going to lunch. I am wearing a grey sweater and distressed light wash jeans.

"Where are you going?" Olivia asks as I finish curling my hair.

"To lunch with Andrew, the guy I told you about who talked to Nathan," I say and she laughs.

"I don't want to hook up with you, Andrew?" She asks and I nod. She starts laughing.

"I will never get over that story," she says and I laugh.

"If I didn't have a very hot boyfriend I would have been insulted," I say as I put on lip gloss.

"And he would have totally been trying to get in your pants," I pick up a pillow and throw it at her.

"I hate you," I say and she laughs.

"No you don't," she says.

"Have fun at lunch with lover boy," she says and I flick her off before walking out.

I walk downstairs and I am met with my new friend. "Grey, are we sober this time?" He asks and I shake my head laughing.

"Shut up," I say laughing.

We start walking down towards The Table, which is a little lunch cafe. It's super yummy. "So how have you been?" I ask.

"Since your breakdown pretty good. Your boyfriend and I have quite a bit in common. We started texting after that night. I also got initiated into my frat," he says and I smile.

"So next party I will walk you home? I ask and he nods laughing.

"You're funny, Grey," He says and I smile. We get to the restaurant and sit down.

"So you are from Seattle, what made you come to Vancouver?" He asks.

"My mom went here, she was an English Lit Major which was what I came here to do, but I switched to psychology. And it's close enough when I wanna be close, and far enough when I wanna be far," I say and he nods.

"I get that, what do you wanna do with a psych degree?" He asks as we get our drinks. We also order our food.

"I am leaning towards being a child psychologist. You know working in a hospital setting or a school," I say and he nods. "Enough about me, what's your story?" I ask.

"I am from Portland as you know. I came here because it is so close to home, I live 30 minutes from here. I grew up loving this school and I think it was inevitable for me to go here. I am a business major. Hoping to go into mergers and acquisitions," he says.

"No way that's what my dad does," I say.

"Really? Who is your…. wait is your dad no he can't be," he says and I laugh.

"Christian Grey," I say and his mouth drops open.

"You're Phoebe Grey," He says.

"You don't miss much do you?" I ask sarcastically. He shakes his head and rubs his face.

"I mean, I knew your last name was Grey, but I didn't think you were the Grey family. That's why you have the bodyguard," he says and I nod laughing.

"Yeah Sawyer is with me everywhere I go," I say.

"I walked Christian Grey's hammered daughter home, I was not expecting this," He says and I laugh.

"Anyway, you were saying," I say.

"Right, I was saying I want to go into mergers and acquisitions and hopefully work at a company in a city like Seattle or New York someday," he says and I nod.

"That's super cool, how are the business classes here?" I ask him.

"Dry as expected, but some are pretty fun. My sister just graduated this past year with her BA in business and marketing from here," he says.

"That's awesome is she your only sibling?" I ask him.

"No I have two older sisters, Abby works for Vogue in New York, Maeve just graduated and is working for Apple in their marketing department, then there is me, and Elizabeth is a sophomore in high school," he says.

"The only boy in the family," I say and he nods.

"What about you?" He asks.

"Just one brother named Teddy. He is in law school at Harvard right now," I say and he nods.

"You've got quite the family," He says and I shake my head.

"It sounds like you do too," I say and he smiles.

"Yeah, there aren't many dull moments," he says and I smile. Our food gets delivered and we begin to eat.

"So when did you and Nathan meet?" He asks.

"We met our junior year of high school. He moved here from Florida, and we met in the attendance office of my school. He walked in to discuss who he would be shadowing and I was leaving. Our principal saw us talking and made him shadow me. We ended up clicking and have been together ever since. Our two year is coming up this month," I say and he smiles.

"Young love," He says and I laugh

"So what about you, since you aren't into me are there any girls out there," I tease and he smirks.

"I am taking a break from the dating scene. I got burned pretty hard last year," he says and I frown.

"Mind me asking what happened?" I ask.

"I was dating this girl for about a year. Her name was Samantha and I worshiped the ground she walked on. I thought she was it for me, I found out the week before graduation that she had been hooking up with my friend the entire time," he says and I frown.

"that is horrible, I am so sorry," I say and he shakes his head.

"It's in the past," he says and I nod.

"I get it, you deserve a good girl, you're a good guy Andrew really," I say and he smiles.

"Thank you, Phoebe," He says.

We finish up lunch and he walks me back to my dorm. It was good to get lunch with a guy as friends and nothing more. No wonder he and Nathan get along they are both so sweet.

—-

I am so excited for tonight. Ava's school gets the week before Thanksgiving off too so she is flying to Vancouver then driving to Seattle from here. I haven't seen her since we left.

"When does your cousin get here?" Olivia asks.

"Is about an hour, where should we take her tonight?" I ask Olivia.

"Does she like to party?" I laugh at that question.

"More than anyone I know," I say and Olivia smiles.

"Sigma Chi is having a party tonight, all sororities are invited, we could get Maisy and I could get my friend Elle that's a DZ," she says.

"Oh that would be so fun, I've never been to the sigma chi house," I say.

"It's huge, some of the guys are kinda weird but it's fun," she says and I nod.

"Cool cool, okay I am heading to the airport to pick her up with Sawyer," I say.

"Tell him I think he is hot," I throw a pillow at her.

"That is so gross," I say laughing. Olivia has a thing for Sawyer she thinks he is so hot. Ew.

"Bye love you," she says.

"Love you too," I say before walking out. I get to Sawyer's car and get in.

"Hey kiddo," he says.

"Hi Sawyer, how are you?" I ask him.

"I'm great, how is college treating you?" He asks.

"Well you have been following me around the entire time, but I would say pretty great," I say and he shakes his head laughing.

"Yeah, you do look like you have been having a good time. And you have made some new friends I see," he says looking over at me.

"Who? Andrew?" I ask and he shrugs.

"I don't know, a guy who has been walking you home when you are intoxicated. I almost intervened but then I figured you would get more upset," he says.

"Andrew is just a friend. He is a pledge at a frat and had to be sober monitor," I say and he nods.

"I get it, seems like a good kid," he says and I nod.

"Yeah, he is. He is a big fan of my dad," I say and Sawyer laughs.

"Really?" He says and I nod.

"Really, he wants to go into mergers and acquisitions," I say.

"Interesting," He says and I smile.

The rest of the car ride is spent talking about school, we pull up to the airport and park the car. Ava's flight landed about 15 minutes ago so she should be here any minute.

"Are you excited?" Sawyer asks.

"Beyond excited," I say and he smiles.

Finally, I see a blonde with a Louis Vuitton suitcase. I know that is my girl. I get out of the car and run towards her. She drops her suitcase and about jumps on me.

"Pheebs," she says as we hug.

"I missed you so much," I say.

"I know I missed you too," she says.

"Come on let's get to WSU," I say.

We get into the car and she gives Sawyer a hug. It feels so good to have her here. This is the longest we have been apart since, well since Ava was born and I wasn't yet.

"How is California treating you?" I ask her.

"It's amazing, a total dream. I think I was meant to be a Cali girl, how is Vancouver?" She asks.

"Amazing. The partying and the people are great. I changed my major," I say and she raises her eyebrows.

"Don't tell me to pre-med," she says and I shake my head. As if I would follow Nathan into that major. Well, maybe I would.

"Psychology," I say and she smiles.

"I knew it, I knew it," she says and she starts typing furiously on her phone.

"Woah Woah knew what?" I ask.

"I told my mom as soon as you went into English Lit I knew you would change your major to something with kids. You loved the Cruz's and volunteering at the hospital too much to not," she says. Wow. I mean call it sisters intuition.

"Dang, girl. You know me too well I guess," I say and she smiles.

The rest of the ride is spent chatting and sending selfies to our parents. We finally get to my dorm. I give Sawyer a hug then head upstairs. Ava is sleeping on the pullout couch. It was smart of us to get one.

We walk upstairs and I walk into my room. Olivia is doing her makeup when we walk in. "Liv this is my cousin Ava, Ava this is Olivia, my roommate," I say and she smiles.

"Hi nice to meet you," Ava says as they hug. My two besties are meeting.

"Nice to meet you too, so you go to San Diego State?" Olivia asks as she sits back down continuing her makeup. Ava looks around our dorm.

"Yes, I'm studying fashion merchandising," she says and Olivia smiles.

"That's so awesome. Pheebs and I will have to come visit you," she says making me laugh.

"Yes for sure. I will take you guys out. Speaking of where are we going out tonight?" Ava asks looking at me.

"Sigma Chi is having an open sorority night," she says.

"Oh fun, are you guys both Sig Kaps?" Ava asks.

"No I'm a Delta Zeta, but Maisy and Phoebe both are," she says.

"Who is Maisy?" Ava asks.

"Oh one second," Olivia starts banging on the wall. Maisy walks in a few seconds later in her bathrobe.

"What? I was about to go shower for tonight, oh hi, you must be Ava, I am Maisy and I am not dressed, but it's so nice to meet you," that sends us all into a fit of laughter.

"I'm Ava, nice to meet you," she says laughing. Maisy heads off to shower and Ava and I start getting ready for tonight.

We are sorting through Ava's clothes deciding what she should wear. We finally decide on two outfits for us. We both start doing our makeup and hair. Maisy comes in to do her makeup and hair too and brings us all drinks to pregame.

"Thank you girl," I say to her. I sip my vodka cranberry as I straighten my hair.

Once we are all ready and officially buzzed we head out. When we get to the frat, I get Ava and my drinks. I spot Andrew and grab Ava's hand. We walk over to him and he gives me a hug.

"Grey, you still keep that promise of walking me home tonight?" He teases as he drinks his beer.

"Yeah if you're lucky," I say smirking.

"This is my cousin Ava she is here from SDSU," I say.

"Ahh Cali girl, nice to meet you Ava I am Andrew Thomas. Your cousin's babysitter when she is drunk," he says and I punch him in the arm.

"He is not, he walked me home from parties when he was a pledge. He and Nathan have started quite the bromance," I tease.

"Ah, you know the famous Nathan Moore. It's nice to meet you too. Are you in sigma chi?" She asks him.

"No Fiji," he says and she nods smiling.

"Cool, I'm an Alpha Phi at San Diego," she says.

"The blonde house," he teases and she shakes her head.

"Whatever, frat boy," she says.

"I'm getting another beer you ladies need anything?" He asks and we both shake our heads. He walks away and Ava smirks at me.

"He is ridiculously hot," she says.

"Yeah and I am ridiculously taken, He is just a friend a really good one," I say and she nods.

"Can I bang your really good friend?" She asks and my mouth drops open.

"No you can't," I say and we both laugh.

We both keep drinking and walking around talking to Everyone. Ava meets almost all of my friends from my sorority. When the night ends Andrew walls us all home even though he is the soberest.

"Bye Grey girls," he says.

"Why don't you just come sleep on the floor in here?" I ask him. We have a big fluffy rug.

"Yeah come on loser," Olivia says.

"Uh fine," He says and lays on our floor. We all end up passing out very quickly from the drinking. We are not going to wake up for a while.

—-

Today is the day I get to go home! Nathan is already there because he flew home yesterday. Our two year anniversary is this weekend. I have no clue what he has planned.

Olivia left yesterday so I pack up my stuff lock the door and head to Sawyer's car. I put my stuff in the trunk with his help then get in the car. I have my laptop because I am going to do some homework.

I end up falling asleep the majority of the way to my house instead of doing homework. When I wake up we are about 10 minutes away. "Dang I slept for a long time," I say.

"Yes you did, with what time you have been coming home lately I think you needed it," He says making me laugh.

"Are you excited to be home?" He asks.

"More than excited," I say and he smiles.

We pull up to my house and I am practically bouncing out of my seat. I grab my suitcase much to Sawyer's disliking and take it up the steps. "You don't have to take my suitcase you do almost everything else for me," I say and he laughs.

I walk inside my house to smell the amazing home smell. I set my suitcase down and walk into the kitchen to find my parents sitting down at the counter eating lunch. I smile and come up behind them.

"Hey guys," I say and they both turn at the same time smiling.

"Phoebe," My mom says and jumps up hugging me. I wrap my arms around my mom tightly.

"Hi momma," I say and she rubs my back.

"How are you my sweets?" She asks.

"I'm good, happy to be home and to see you guys," I say. She holds me in a hug.

"Can I have a turn now?" I hear and see my dad waiting patiently. My mom lets go of me and smoothes out my hair.

"Hi Bubs," He says and I smile hugging him tightly.

"Hi dad," I say and he rubs my back. He holds me out at arm's length looking me over.

"I missed you so much," he says and I smile.

"I know I missed you too," I say.

"Tell us everything," my mom says acting like I don't call them every other day if not once a day.

"I love it so much, it is so much fun. I love my sorority sisters and my big, I love school and my classes. It is just amazing," I say.

"That is so good to hear. I am sure your brother will love hearing that too," My dad says and I smile.

"Where is Teddy?" I ask.

"He is at Conner's right now he should be back any second," My dad says.

"Is Delaney here again for Thanksgiving?" I ask. My mom and dad look at each other and I give them a weird look.

"What?" I ask.

"Delaney and Ted broke up in October, did he not tell you?" My mom asks. I am shocked. More than shocked.

"What, why? Why didn't he tell me?" I ask.

The door opens and in walks Teddy Grey. I turn and he smiles when he sees me. "Bubs," He says and comes and gives me a hug.

"Hey Teddy," I say and hug him back.

"What's going on? How is freshman year?" He asks. We talk weekly I am so hurt that he never told me.

"It's great, how is junior year?" I ask him.

"It's tough, but it is very fun," he says.

"Why didn't you tell me you and Delaney broke up last month," I ask. His mouth drops open and he looks to our parents.

"Phoebe, I never meant to…. Look it's complicated," he says.

"You would be the first to know if Nathan and I ever broke up," I say and he frowns.

"I know that Bubs I just didn't want you to be worried from all the way in Vancouver I know how you get. I wanted to be the one to tell you in person," he says. That is kind of thoughtful of him.

"Okay... I guess that makes sense. Why did you guys break up," I say and he frowns looking to my dad?

"She uh was cheating on me," He says and my mouth drops open.

"What a bitch," I say.

"Language," both my parents say at the same time making all of us laugh.

"Look Bubs, it wasn't meant to be. I don't need a girlfriend right now. School is keeping me very busy anyway," he says and I nod. I give him a hug and he kisses my head.

"It's so good to be home," I smile. My dad wraps his arms around me and kisses my head.

"We missed you," He says against my head.

"I missed you guys so much too," I say. "It's so good to be home," I smile.

"Are you hungry, Bubs? You are looking thinner, let's get you lunch," My dad says. Oh, how I missed being home.

"I'm not too hungry, but I will eat," I say and my dad smiles. He gets me a plate with a sub, pasta salad, and fruit.

"Thank you," I say. Teddy and my parents sit down next to me and all stare at me. I giggle at them.

"I feel like a human TV show. Why is everyone looking at me like you are shocked I made it here," I say and they start laughing.

"We just never imagined our baby being gone for so long. We aren't used to having kids in the house now," My mom says. I laugh at that.

"Did Olivia go home to Florida for break?" My dad asks.

"Yep, she left yesterday," I say and he nods.

"How are you two getting along?" My mom asks.

"We have never fought. She is the coolest person I know. I love rooming with her," I say and my parents break out in huge smiles.

"We love to hear that, Bubs," he says.

The rest of lunch is spent talking and bonding. That night we have a family movie night. I lay with my dad as we watch a scary movie. It is so good to be home. And my dad hasn't left me alone once. I think he really did miss me. Makes my heart so happy.

—

Yesterday was Thanksgiving which was spent with my family. It was so amazing getting to see my grandparents and hang out with my aunts and uncles and cousins. Plus eat very good food. But today is Nathan and my two year anniversary. I am in my car now on my way there.

When I get there he is waiting on the front porch. I park my car and get out running towards him. "Hi Bee," He says and I throw myself in his arms. He smells just like Nathan. It's the most comforting smell.

"I missed you," I say as he holds me tightly. He leans down and kisses me.

"I missed you more. Happy two year anniversary," He says and I say it back to him.

We walk inside and before the door is even shut I am over his shoulder and we are going to his room. I giggle as he carries me. "Fuck I missed that sound," he says and I smile.

He throws me on the bed and I laugh as he laughs on top of me kissing me. I wrap my arms around him as we make out. He takes my top off and leaves me in a bra. "Fuck you look so good," he says and I smile. I slip off his shirt and start kissing his neck as he slides my pants off.

"I need you right now," he says and I nod. I unbuckle his pants and pull them down and his boxers. I stroke him a couple of times before he is inside of me.

The first time he goes in me I moan. It's been so long. I have to get used to his size. Did he get bigger? I dig my nails into his back and he stays like that not moving.

"You okay?" He asks and I nod.

"Hold on," I say and he nods kissing me all over my face. He slowly slides out then in once. He looks down to see if I am okay.

"Move," I say and he slides out than in. The first couple of times it is slow until he is confident I am okay.

"Ahhh Nathan," I Call out his name.

"Feel it, baby," He says and I do. He speeds up and I am calling out his name.

"Come for me," He says and on his command I do. Soon after me, he is finishing. We are both out of breath.

I lay on his chest we are both naked and he rubs my back. I kiss his chest and look up at him. "Hi," I say and he leans down kissing my head.

"Hi beautiful girl," He says and I smile.

"I missed you," I say and rub his bicep. He has gotten more muscular since he left.

"I missed you more," he says brushing the hair out of my face.

"I don't want this to end," I say. He looks down confused.

"I don't want us to leave again," I say. He finally understands and pulls me closer.

"Baby, we just got here, you don't have to worry about that. And besides you are coming to see me in December then we have all Christmas break," he says and I nod.

"I know, I am so excited to watch you play. How has basketball been?" I ask him.

"It's been so good, I love the team," He says and I smile.

"Will I get to meet them?" I ask him as I rest my chin on his chest.

"I think we could arrange that. I will have to take you out when you come so you can meet my friends," he says and I smile.

"I would like that a lot, when are you going to come to visit me?" I ask him.

"Hmmm we can arrange that," he says and I smile.

"I want you to meet my friends, and you can finally meet Andrew in person," I say and Nathan nods.

"Thank you for being so cool about him by the way. He is super cool," I say.

"He is cool, and very protective of you which I appreciate," he says and I smile looking down.

I wrap my arms around Nathan pulling myself closer. I have missed this boy so much. He wraps his strong arms around me tightly and I kiss his neck.

"I love you so much, my girl," He says.

We both clean ourselves up and get dressed. I put my hair in a ponytail. When Nathan comes out of the bathroom he playfully pulls on my ponytail. He sits next to me on the bed. "You hungry for some lunch?" He asks.

"Sure, do you wanna go out?" I ask him.

"I actually bought some food yesterday for me to make you, but if you wanna go out I can take us anywhere," I smile. My sweet boy. I smile and straddle him so we are face to face.

"I love you so much, I would love nothing more than you to make lunch," I say. He smiles and kisses me.

We walk downstairs and he pulls out all the food he bought to make. "What's for lunch," I smile as I sit on the counter.

"Lemon chicken and arugula salad," he says and I smile.

"You are seriously the best. How did I get two full years will you?" I ask him. He comes over standing between my legs.

"I ask myself the same thing every day," he says and kisses me.

I help him make the salad because cooking meat isn't my thing. And neither of us want salmonella. "So tell me how are pre-med classes?" I ask him.

"So interesting. I know I'm only in my first year but I really am thinking I wanna be a general surgeon," he says.

"Like Bailey from Grey's Anatomy?" I ask.

"Something like that," he says laughing.

"You would be the best Doctor," I say and he smiles.

"You are going to be the best psychologist," he says.

"You flatter me," I say and he smiles.

We cook together and then sit down to eat. I smile as we sit across from each other at the table. I put my feet up and rest them on his lap. He looks down and laughs shaking his head.

"Have you seen Tyler or anyone since you have been back?" I ask him. He nods as he chews.

"Yeah, I saw Preston and Tyler the day I got back. I also saw Drew," he says.

"What about you?" He asks and I shake my head.

"Just Ava and Brooklyn," I smile.

"It's weird being home isn't it?" I ask and he nods.

"It is, it's good to be back with Berkeley though," Nathan says sighing. He mentioned something back in early October about how she wasn't doing very well.

"How is she?" I ask and he shrugs.

"She has done a complete 180. She used to try so hard in school, and practice dance 24/7. My mom said she is hanging with a new group of girls and she doesn't have a good feeling about them," he sighs. I frown shaking my head.

"Where did this come from?" I ask. It sounds so unlike Berkeley.

"It started in the middle of this summer. Apparently, it has only gotten worse since I left. My dad isn't helping either is what my mom says. I have tried talking to her and she just shuts me out. I am so worried for her," he admits and I take his hand from across the table.

"You my friend are such a good brother. Nobody can compare to you. I hope you know that. Nothing you did could have caused this. I am here to help in any way I can," I say and he nods.

"And that is why I love you so much. I just wish I knew what could have caused this much change in her life," he says.

"I'm sure when she is ready she will talk to you about it, she is very lucky to have you," I say.

"I know, hey enough about this, let me take your plate," he says and grabs my plate off the table. He puts them in the dishwasher then comes back to me.

"How does some time in the hot tub sound?" He asks.

"Amazing," I smile. "But I don't have a bathing suit," I say.

"Just wear your bra and underwear," He says and I smile.

We go to his back porch and I strip. I'm left in my black bra and underwear. I climb into the hot tub and he comes in shortly after in his boxers. He wraps an arm around me. The jet hits my back perfectly massaging it. I don't think life could get any better.

"If this is two years I am ready for many many more," I say. Nathan leans down kissing my head.

"Me too, my love. Me too," he says.

_**DECEMBER **_

I am back at school. My Thanksgiving break was better than anything I could have asked for. It was so good getting to hang out with my parents, Teddy, and Nathan. It was a bummer to hear about Ted and Delaney, but if it wasn't meant to be, it wasn't meant to be.

Next weekend is sibs weekend for my sorority meaning Ted is coming here. I am so excited. We rented out a bar, and everyone's siblings are coming. Caroline, my big, is an only child so she is hanging with us.

The weekend after I am headed to New Jersey to watch Nathan in his first game. Then the weekend after that I go home for Christmas break. I am on break until the end of the first week in January. They are generous here with breaks.

I am waiting for Olivia to get back right now. She is on her way back from the airport. We are going to dinner with Andrew. Maisy and Regan get back tomorrow. I had a class today so I had to come back.

I hear the door open and I look up to see Olivia. I smile and rush over giving her a hug. "I missed you, PG," she says and I smile.

"I missed you too," I say. She gets settled in and sits on her bed putting her hair up.

"Before we spill all about our breaks I have bad news," she says and I frown.

"Okay, you're going to kill me, but I kinda forgot about dinner and made plans with Jackson," she says. Jackson is the guy she has been talking to.

"You get a pass this once because we made the plans before break and I forgot until Andrew texted me," I say.

"I'm sorry, next time I am for sure coming. Anyway tell me about your break," she says.

"Lots of time with Nathan and my family," I say. She smirks at me and I blush knowing exactly what she is going to say.

"How was the 2-year sex?" She asks and I laugh.

"You are so forward, and it was amazing if you must know," I say. She smirks and throws her pillow at me. There is a knock on our door and I know it is Andrew.

"See ya later, use protection," I say walking out.

"Grey, it's good to see you," Andrew says as he wraps me in a hug. I hug him back smiling.

"I missed you," I say.

"I missed you too," he says. "How was break?" He asks as we start walking towards the Mexican restaurant we both love. They also give margaritas without carding. So that's a bonus.

"My break was amazing. It was so good to be back home for a few days and get to spend time with my family. What about you?" I ask him.

"It was good. I got to see my newborn cousin and meet my sister's boyfriend. Oh, congrats on your and Nathan's two year anniversary. That's a long time," he says.

"Thank you, tell me about your cousin and the boyfriend," I say.

"The newborn cousin is from my moms youngest sister. It is her second baby. She had a girl and they named her Monroe Grace," he says. I smile.

"Congratulations, that is a beautiful name," I say.

"It is, and my sister's new boyfriend is cool. They both live in New York, she works for Vogue and he works for Morgan Stanley which is an investment bank. I don't know how long he will last, but for now he is keeping her happy," he says and I smile. He opens the door for me at the restaurant and we sit down at a table.

"If he treats her right and makes her happy then that's all that matters right," I say as I eat some chips and salsa.

"Oh yeah, but she dates a lot of guys. It's never just been one guy for her. Abby is kind of a free spirit," he says and I smile.

"Good for her," I say. A waiter comes over and we order two margaritas and our food.

"Are you excited for sibs weekend?" He asks.

"Yes, you will have to meet Teddy. I think you guys would get along alright," I smile.

"Yes, I am curious to know what your brother is like and what he has to say about you," He says as our margaritas get delivered.

I sip mine and it is delicious. I can tell Andrew is thinking the same thing. It is so good.

Before we know it we are eating tacos and we are on margarita 4 laughing about the first time we went met. "You were so drunk," Andrew says almost making me spit out my taco. I take a sip of my margarita.

"I felt so bad for you," I laugh.

"Yeah uh huh," he says and I laugh.

"I'm so glad it was you who walked me home," I say.

"Me too, lord knows what would have happened if one of the other pledges walked you home," he says.

"That is very true," I say and sit back. I am pretty drunk but it is good fun drunk.

"Should I walk you home?" He asks and I nod.

"Third time's a charm," I laugh.

We walk out with locked elbows. It is chilly but it feels kinda good. Plus there are lights up for the holidays so it is so pretty out. By the time we get to my dorm, I am exhausted.

"Goodnight. Thank you for dinner," I smile. He gives me a hug and says I am so welcome.

"See you soon PG," he says and I smile. I shut the door and get into bed heading to sleep.

—-

Today is the day that Teddy is coming! I am so excited. He is staying at the hotel on campus because it would be weird if he stayed in my dorm. I am walking over to the hotel right now. We are meeting and going to dinner before we go out tonight.

I walk into the hotel I just came from class so my backpack is still on. I sit down in the lobby and wait. A person comes by and gives me a glass of water. Dang, this is nice. I might just start coming here more often.

"Bubs," I hear from behind me. I smile and get up giving Ted a huge hug.

"Hey Ted," I smile.

"Come get checked in with me, how are you?" He asks.

"I am great, how are you?" I ask him.

"Happy to be here. I am very excited for tonight," he smiles.

"Room under Christian Grey," He says and I wait while he gets all checked in. He gets the keys and we head up to his room. We go up to the top floor and go into the suite. I sit down on the chair and Teddy puts his suitcase on the bed.

"I am going to get changed and then we can head out to dinner," he says and I nod.

"Okay, you ready?" He asks as he walks out of the bathroom.

"As I'll ever be, can I leave my backpack here and grab it tomorrow?" I ask him.

"For sure, what's for dinner?" He asks as we walk out.

"I was thinking we could go to my favorite dinner place here. It is Italian and very yummy," I say and he nods smiling.

"Sounds good to me," He says.

"Perfect," I say.

We have Sawyer drive us there because it is chilly. Teddy and Sawyer talk about their drafts and all that junk. I sit quietly and listen. Once we get there I give Sawyer a hug and we head inside.

"How was your flight?" I ask as we get seated.

"Long but that is to be expected when you are coming from Boston," he says and I nod smiling.

"Thank you for coming, I am so excited for you to meet everyone," I say.

"I am excited to meet everyone too. Go easy on the drinking though tonight, if anything happens to you dad will drive here and kill me with his own two hands," Teddy says and I smile.

"I think I can manage to be good for one night," I say and he smiles.

We order our food and talk about life. It is so good to be here with teddy. I have one thing I want to ask him but I am not sure if he will be open about it. I know it's a sensitive topic.

"Can I ask you something?" I ask him as our food gets brought out.

"Anything, what's up, Bubs?" He asks.

"What happened with Delaney?" I ask him. He sighs and takes a sip of his drink.

"She cheated on me," He says and I nod and take a bite of my food. Not the answer I was hoping for.

"It was with one of the guys in my fraternity. She came over to find me apparently and he was there waiting and one thing leads to another," he says and I frown.

"Did it happen more than once?" I ask.

"Yes, it went on for a month before I found out," he says.

"How did you find out?" I ask him.

"The guy told me," he says and I nod.

"What a bitch," I say.

"She made a mistake. I will never get back together with her, but I do think she has a good heart," he says. Teddy has always been this way. He got my moms calmness. I would have freakout out.

"You're a good guy, Teddy," I say and he smiles.

We finish up eating and head back to his hotel room. I am ready to go out. He just had to grab a couple of things. When he is ready I take him to the bar. On the way there we pick up Caroline.

"Pheebs," She says and gives me a huge hug.

"I haven't seen you in forever," I say and she smiles.

"You look, good kid," she smiles.

"Caroline this is my brother Teddy, Teddy this is Caroline, my big. She doesn't have any siblings so she is hanging with us tonight," I say. Caroline gives him a look. I know the exact look it is. She thinks he is hot and by the way, he is looking at her it is reciprocated.

"Hi I'm Caroline Hall, nice to meet you," she smiles. She is in black jeans and a black satin camisole with lace down the front showing her cleavage off.

"I'm Ted Grey, pleasure is all mine," he says. We walk into the bar and all 3 of us grab drinks.

"So you're a sophomore here?" Ted asks.

"Yep studying business, what about you?" She asks.

"I'm at Harvard in the law program," he says and she smiles.

"A smart kid," She laughs. I leave them to talk and go find Maisy. She is in her leopard pants and black body suit. I go up and tap her.

"Hey I was just going to come to find you, this is my sister Conley," she says.

"Hi I'm Phoebe," I say.

"Hi nice to meet you, I've heard a lot about you," she says and I smile.

"Good things I hope," I laugh.

"All good things," she says. We talk for a bit more and I keep drinking. After spending some time with Maisy and her sister I talk to Lyla.

I then realize I need to find Ted. I look around and see him and Caroline at the bar. They are laughing and talking. I walk up to them and smile.

"Hi," I say.

"Hi, how are you Bubs?" Ted asks.

"Bubs, that's such a cute nickname," Caroline smiles.

I sit down with them and we drink and talk for a while. I check my phone and realize how late it is. The bar is kicking people out in 10 minutes. "We should get going," Caroline says.

We walk out. My dorm is not too far from here. "I'll see you guys later," Caroline says. I don't want her walking alone. Ted and Caroline are pretty buzzed. Along with me, I guess.

"Caroline let us walk you home," I say.

"Your dorm is the complete opposite of my house. I feel bad," she says.

"How about you walk Phoebe home with me then I'll walk you home," he says.

"That's a good idea come on," I say and she smiles.

They walk me back to my dorm and I head inside sitting down. I give Caroline a hug goodbye. I give Teddy a hug too. I lay on my bed and pass out. Tomorrow I have to grab my backpack from Ted's room. He gave me a key so if I wake up early I'll just sneak in. I head to bed for the night.

When I wake up I see it is 8. I decide to head over to Teddy's room after getting ready so we can grab breakfast before he leaves. I walk over and ride the elevator up to his floor. I walk in and read the key in the door. I walk into a dark room. The only light shining is peeking in through the curtains.

Quietly I pick up my backpack. I look at the bed and am confused. Why are there two people in the bed? I look down to the floor and see Teddy's clothes and a pair of black ripped jeans. Those look familiar. There is also a black silk camisole. Oh my god. Oh my god.

All of a sudden teddy sits up. He is shirtless. "Phoebe, oh god," he says and rubs his face.

"What the fuck, Ted?" I say. Caroline pops up and I see she is not wearing any clothes. Oh my god. Ew. She covers her chest and I can tell she is speechless.

"Are you fucking kidding?" I ask.

"Phoebe, hold on. Let's just talk about this," he tries to say.

"You were supposed to come and hang out with me not fuck my sorority sister. Goodbye, I have class," I say. I storm out. I quickly exit the building and head home.

I have never been this angry in my life. That is my sorority sister. He was here for me not her. I can't believe he fucking did that. What an ass. I rush back to my dorm and lock the door luckily Olivia has class all day so she won't be here. I put my face in my pillow and close my eyes. What am I going to do?

—-

It's been a week and I still have yet to talk to Ted. I am so angry at him right now it is not even funny. Caroline has tried calling me but I don't answer. He just got out of a relationship and he comes here and hooks up with my friends. That's Gross and he would have been pissed.

I am trying to put that behind me because today, I am going to New Jersey. I am on my way to the airport right now. Sawyer is flying out with me on the jet. I look down and see my dad calling me.

"Hey Bubs," He says.

"Hi dad," I smile.

"How are you?" He asks me.

"Ready to see, Nathan," I admit.

"Is everything okay in Vancouver?" He asks.

"Yeah I just miss Nathan," I say which is partially true.

"Well, I am excited to see you next week. I know mom and Ted are too," he says.

"Me too, does ted get home next week too?" I ask.

"Yes, now are you ever going to tell mom and me what happened?" He asks.

"Nothing of importance, we just got to the jet. I love you," I say.

"I love you most," he sighs. We hang up and we board the jet. I go into a seat in the back buckle myself up and then lay my seat back to sleep. They dim the cabin lights and I am out. All the stress of fighting with Teddy and school has gotten to me.

When I wake up we have landed. Sawyer scolds me and says I need to sleep more when I am at school. Even when my dad isn't with me I have people acting just like him.

Sawyer gets in the rental Audi and we drive towards Princeton. As we get closer I realize how beautiful the campus is. This is my first time in New Jersey too.

When we get to Nathan's dorm I thank Sawyer and grab my bag. Nathan comes out as I get the door. I smile and jump in his arms. He picks me up off my feet in a big bear hug.

"Hi baby," he says.

"Hi good looking," I say and he gives me a kiss.

"Let's get you inside it's chilly out here," He says and kisses my head.

"It's so pretty here," I say and he nods smiling.

"Here we are," he says and we walk in his dorm. It is nothing like I imagined it. He has a grey comforter and grey pillows. He has a Princeton banner over his bed. On his nightstand, he has a picture of me. I blush as I see it. It is on his birthday when we went on the Ferris wheel. It was his wallpaper on his phone for so long.

"It is so clean and organized," I say. He smiles and looks around rubbing the back of his neck.

"Uh yeah, it's not usually like this. I made Cole clean up since you were coming, I even lit a candle," he says. This boy has my whole heart. I laugh and walk over to him. I hold his face between my hands and kiss him. The kiss turns passionate and he guides me over to his bed. I lay back and he gets on top of me.

We make out and as Nathan goes to take off my shirt the door swings open. Nathan jumps off of me and pulls my shirt down. I look up to see his roommate Cole who I have never met in person. Nathan has posted pictures with him on his Instagram.

"Shit sorry man," Cole says to Nathan.

"Don't worry about it," Nathan says helping me stand. I smooth out my pants. "This is my girlfriend, Phoebe," Nathan says.

"What a great first impression I am making," I laugh as I shake his hand. He laughs with me.

"Don't worry about it, I'm Cole," he says. "I'll know to knock next time," he smirks. I laugh and sit with Nathan on his bed.

"So where are we taking the girl tonight?" Cole asks Nathan.

"I was thinking we could go to Mark's. They are having a party tonight," Nathan says.

"Oh shit yes let's do it, you aren't drinking though right?" He asks.

"No game tomorrow at 12," Nathan says.

"Okay, I am not sleeping here tonight so you guys will have the room to yourselves," he winks at Nathan.

"I'm going to go shower and get ready," Cole says before walking out. I turn to Nathan and he laughs.

"Well that was Cole," he smiles.

"Do you need to shower before we go out? I am having pizza be delivered here. It's my favorite I think you will love it," He says.

"I am excited about pizza, and no I showered before I left. I just need to do my hair," I say. He pulls out the chair for me at his desk and shows me where the outlet is. I thank him. He sits and watches me.

"So can you finally tell me what is going on with you?" He asks. I might have not yet told Nathan what is happening either.

"I'm just fighting with Teddy," I sigh. I begin to straighten my long hair. It shouldn't take long because it is already pretty straight.

"I called you last week and you answered crying," he says. "It's not just a fight with Teddy," he says. So intuitive.

"I just," I brush out my hair after I run the straightener through it a couple of more times before unplugging it. Nathan is still sitting waiting patiently. I go and sit next to him resting my head on his shoulder.

"What's going on with you?" He asks as he pulls us back so he is resting against his headboard holding me.

"Teddy slept with my big," I say. Nathan looks down at me and I can see in his eyes he isn't sure how to fix this one.

"I walked in on it," I say.

"Oh no, baby," He says and I shake my head.

"The morning after I should say, I was so angry at him I just stormed out," I say.

"Didn't you say him and Delaney broke up," he says.

"That doesn't give him a right to go sleep with my big during sibs weekend. It was supposed to be about us bonding not him getting laid," I say.

"You are completely right and have every reason to be mad. I just think that you should talk to him. Not shut him out because that is when things get messy," he says and I nod.

"I know, I will next week. For now, I just want to pretend I never saw them naked in bed together," I say trying to get the picture out of my head.

"I'm sorry that happened baby," He says and kisses my head.

"It's fine," I sigh. There is a knock on the door and a showered Cole walks in with a box of pizza holding a piece in his mouth.

"I knocked this time," he jokes as he sets the pizza down.

"A novelty," Nathan jokes.

We all take a piece and sit eating it in their room. I learn that Cole is from Connecticut and plays football. He is so nice and very funny.

After we are done eating I change my clothes into some going out wear which consists of a black silk onesie that has a low cut center. A black jean jacket and black jeans with leopard print booties. I put on my perfume and add some finishing touches to my makeup.

"Okay I'm ready," I smile.

"You look beautiful," he says and kisses my head. We head out and Nathan takes my hand. We head out and walk to a very large house.

Nathan holds my hand tightly as we walk up to the house. "Moore," a guy yells and slaps Nathan on the back.

"What's up, Martz?" He asks.

"Not much, you got yourself a dime for this party," he says motioning to me. I smile and look to Nathan.

"This is my girlfriend, Phoebe Grey. She goes to Washington State," he says and looks down at me.

"Nice to meet you, I'm Michael," he says and shakes my hand.

We talk to Michael for a bit before walking inside the house. It is huge here. A group of girls comes up to me complimenting my outfit and saying hi to Nathan. "You have quite the fan base here," I smile. Nathan laughs and gets me a drink.

"Nothing compares to you," he smiles. I kiss him and take a sip of my drink. He keeps his hand at the small of my back. There is loud music blaring over the speakers.

"Nathan," a girl who is very pretty comes up and hugs him.

"Hi, how are you?" He asks.

"I'm great, I haven't seen you in a while, how's life?" She asks. I have to swallow the jealousy and remember I have guy friends at school.

"It's good, I know it has been too long. This is my girlfriend, Phoebe grey she is visiting from Vancouver," he says.

"Hi, nice to meet you. I am Samantha White. I am from Portland Oregon," that's funny, that's where Andrew is from.

"I have a friend from Portland Oregon, he went to Greensburg High School," I say. Her face lights up.

"No way that is where I went, what is his name," she asks.

"Andrew Thomas," I say. Her face turns white and she quickly makes an excuse to leave. That was weird I wonder why….. oh no.

"I wonder what that was about," Nathan says shrugging.

"Shit. She dating Andrew and cheated on him. I didn't know she went here. Why did Andrew never tell me," I sigh?

"She doesn't go here. She goes to Rhodes College but comes here to party. That's so funny," he says and I slap his arm. He would find that funny.

I stay with Nathan for the rest of the night. We turn in at around midnight so Nathan can get a good night's sleep. We walk back to his dorm and I get into my PJs putting my hair in a high pony. I don't even press for sex as I know Nathan needs sleep. We squeeze into his twin bed even though there is an open one right next to us. We spoon and end up falling asleep quickly in my love's arms.

I wake up to the sound of Nathan getting ready. I slowly sit up and he passes me a plate of peanut butter and banana toast. My favorite. "Thank you, love," I say and he smiles.

He is getting ready for his game. He has his warm-ups on. I look to see it is 10. I know he has to be there by 10:30. I can see it in his eyes he is nervous. I put down my plate and tell him to come to me. He sits down next to me on the bed and I stand between his legs.

"You are going to do great, you have worked so hard and I can't wait to see it pay off," I say.

"I needed to hear that, I love you so much," he says.

"I love you too," I say.

"Now go kick some ass," I kiss him goodbye as he heads to the stadium.

I finish my breakfast and get ready. I put on my Princeton shirt and ripped jeans. I put on a jacket and tie my shoes before heading out the door. I have one ticket close to the front. I get there soon before the game begins.

After the national anthem is played Nathan and his team run onto the court and the game begins. Nathan's team gets the ball and we're off to a good start.

As the game goes on, Princeton is destroying the school. It is so fun to watch my man in action. I cheer for him and take lots of pictures. I probably look like the psycho girlfriend.

Nathan scores a basket just as the buzzer goes off. They won! I am so proud of my man. The team runs off the court and I go wait by the locker room for my boy. After 45 minutes he emerges. He comes up to me and gives me a big kiss.

"Thank you for coming baby," He says.

"No place I'd rather be," I smile.

—-

I've been back at school for two weeks now. Nothing good has happened because I have been cramming for exams. They are no joke. I haven't drunk or gone out in two weeks.

I'm coming home for Christmas today. Unfortunately so is Teddy. We haven't spoken in 3 weeks, so this should be interesting. I am in the car on my way back home.

Nathan doesn't come home til tomorrow. I get to pick him up from the airport because his family left to go to Florida. He said he didn't want to go so they don't come back til Christmas Day. Meaning that Nathan was going to spend Christmas Eve alone at home. When I told my mom that she insisted her stay with us.

"We are here," Sawyer says and I look up to see my beautiful home. This is going to be my longest break yet. Lucky for me my boyfriend has the same length break. Even though it's only been two weeks I miss him.

I walk inside and see my dad and Teddy talking. Ugh. My mom is around the corner and she comes and gives me a huge hug. "My sweet girl," she says holding me tightly.

"Hi mom, I've missed you," I say and she smiles.

"I've missed you too, it'll be good to have another female around here," she says and winks at me.

"Bubs," My dad says and comes up behind her. I rush to him and he holds me in a bone-crushing hug.

"I've missed you," I say.

"I know, I have missed you too," he says holding me and rubbing my back.

We all walk in the kitchen. "Okay everyone sit. Gail made subs for dinner," My mom says. I sigh and sit next to my dad. Usually, I am next to Teddy, but there is no way that is happening. I get a plate put in front of me.

"switching it up today?" My dad asks about the seating. We always sit at the same seats at the table.

"I guess so," My mom says. Teddy and I stay silent. He stopped trying to call me a week after the incident happened. Some would say I am being dramatic but I am not. He never even apologized her just kept going let me explain or I really like her. It hurt the most that it was on sibs weekend.

"Phoebe, how were exams?" My dad asks.

"They were harder than high school that is for sure. I studied super hard though and I think I did well," I say and he smiles.

"We are so proud of you," my mom smiles.

"How is your sorority?" My mom asks. "When is moms day more importantly," she smiles.

"February and Dad's day is in March," I say looking to my dad. He smiles holds a thumbs up.

"I'll be there," he says.

"I'm excited to meet everyone," my mom says clapping her hands.

"You guys never told us about sibs weekend. Or sent us pictures like we asked," my mom says. I scuff and look to Teddy who has not looked up from his plate.

"Will you two get over what happened? Or explain it to us. We know you two are fighting and it is Christmas. You guys don't get to ruin that for us with your petty fighting," my dad scolds us lightly. If only he knew.

"It isn't petty fighting when you don't apologize for your wrongs," I say. Teddy looks up pissed.

"But it is petty when you ignore me for 3 weeks," Ted says.

"Because you never apologized," I fight back.

"Because you never gave me the chance to explain," he says.

"There is nothing to explain," I raise my voice.

"Woah timeout what the hell is going on?" My dad asks.

"Teddy slept with my big and I walked in on them," I say. Teddy's eyes bulge out of his head when I say that.

"Theodore," My mom says rubbing her temples.

"And Phoebe walked in without knocking and stormed out by herself," Teddy says.

"Because I saw you naked with my big," I yell.

"You don't get it, Phoebe. You weren't there and who gives a fuck if I slept with Caroline it's not like you guys were dating," he yells back.

"Theodore language," my dad says.

"Did you use protection?" My dad asks. I about gag on the spot. Is he kidding that's all he asks him?

"Of course we did and she is on the pill," that's it. I am done.

"Ted you were supposed to be there for Phoebe," my mom says. He rolls his eyes.

"I was there for Phoebe all night. I walked her home and made sure she was there safely. I never ditched Phoebe to be with Caroline," he says.

"That's bullshit and you know it. You two were at the bar flirting and drinking all night together, I hung out with Maisy and her sister and Andrew," I say.

"That is just not true," Ted raises his voice.

"I'm done with you lying. You know this entire situation is bullshit on your part and you haven't tried to apologize once. Screw you, Teddy," I say and shove my chair back walking out.

"Phoebe Grey get back in here now," My dad scolds.

"No we told you guys what happened and all you asked was if he used protection. You might as well have high fived him. I'm so done with everyone giving teddy a free pass because he's older and he's a boy. If I slept with one of Teddy's frat brothers it would have been world war 3 and you all know it. This is bullshit and I am done," I storm upstairs. I am so angry. I slam my door and sit on my bed.

Why is my family so infuriating. My mom looked so shocked she didn't even know what to do. Teddy hurt my feelings and he just doesn't get it. I don't understand how someone could be so obtuse.

I lay on my side facing my wall. I text Nathan. I know he won't respond for a while because he is busy at basketball practice sadly. I sigh and pick at my nails. After about half an hour I hear a knock. I don't answer whoever it is doesn't deserve my time.

"Bubs, it's Ted please let me in," screw him. I am not letting him in. After standing there for a while I hear him walk away.

Soon I hear my lock get opened up. Of course, I forgot Dad has a key to every room in this house. I see Ted and my dad standing there.

"Bubs, you can't not say anything when someone knocks. You are going to turn my hair grey," My dad says before walking off. Ted stands there with his arms crossed.

"I am here to apologize. What I did was wrong and I was too prideful to admit it at the moment. I shouldn't have slept with Caroline, after Delaney I was upset and lonely. She was such a great girl, and I took advantage of that. It will never happen again and I get it if you don't want to talk to me right now," he says.

"You are right what you did was wrong and very hurtful, it also hurt that you never apologized. I forgive you, I just wish we were never put in this situation," I say. He smiles and walks over sitting on my bed wrapping an arm around me.

"I never meant to hurt you, kiddo," he says.

"I know, thank you for apologizing," I say.

"Thank you for forgiving me," he says. After he gives me another hug and walks out. I hear a knock on my door soon after and my dad walks in.

"Bubs, can we talk?" He asks.

"Yeah, I guess," I say and scoot over so he can come sit with me. He comes and sits next to me on my bed.

"You know I hate it when you are mad at me right?" He asks. I shrug and he looks over at me.

"Phoebe Grace, you know I will always be in your corner. But I also will be in Ted's. I know the first thing you wanted me to do was yell at him. But I can't just do that. I had to make sure that he was being safe. We don't need him getting a girl across the country from him pregnant. What he did was wrong, and I told him that after you stormed off. So did your mom. But you have to understand, Bubs, I can't just yell at Ted without hearing his side of things," he explains. I guess he does make a fair point.

"Ted already accuses me of babying and favoriting you," He says and I smile trying to hide it.

"I see the smile, you will always be my baby, Phoebe Grace. I know I baby you and I always will. And for being the favorite I can't admit to that," he says making me laugh. I know he is kidding but it's still funny.

"I'm sorry I stormed off," I say and he smiles wrapping an arm around me.

"Some things never change, Bubs," he says and I smile.

"I love you," I say.

"I love you the most," he smiles. We sit there for a while. I rest my head on my dad's shoulder. Before I know it I am asleep. College has taught me one thing. Sleep when and wherever you can because you are not getting a lot of it.

—

Today is get Nathan day. It also is Christmas Eve tomorrow, so I am very excited. I ate dinner with my mom about an hour ago. We did a girls day and hung out together. "When do you pick Nathan up?" My mom asks.

"Eight, so I will leave in 15 minutes or so," I say drinking some water.

"Are you excited to see him?" She asks.

"Beyond excited. Even though it's only been two weeks, I have missed him a lot," I say and she nods.

"I understand that it's hard being away from the person you love," my mom says and I smile.

Before I head out, I say goodbye to my parents. I get in my car yawning. I am still somehow tired even though I slept so much. I drive to Seattle airport and park my car. I head inside to where his flight will get out.

As I am waiting people finally start to come out and then I see him. I get up and run towards him. He smiles and catches me in his arms hugging me. Oh, he smells so good.

"Hi," I smile.

"Hi baby," He says and kisses me. He is in his Princeton sweatshirt and black joggers.

"Let's get your luggage and get you to my house," I say taking his hand. We walk over to baggage claim and watch the belt as a bunch of suitcases pass by us.

"How was the flight?" I ask.

"Not too bad, I was next to a baby," he says.

"Aw speaking of babies, has Elise had her baby girl yet?" I ask him.

"Anytime this week," he says and I smile.

"You will have to keep me posted, I want to go see her with you," I say.

"I will baby," he says and I smile.

We get his luggage and we get in my car. He puts his hand on my thigh and it feels just like old times. I drive towards my house with Sawyer tailing me.

"I have missed you," I say.

"I have missed you so much, I can't wait to be inside of you," He says and I blush.

"Nathan," I laugh. He squeezes my thigh and I smirk.

"Are you tired?" I ask him.

"Not too bad, I just want to shower," he says and I nod. That's understandable.

"I get it, the guest room is all set up for you. You can use it as you please," I smile.

"Can you come shower with me?" He asks as we pull into my driveway.

"If you value your life and mine I'd say no," I smile. He sighs and gets out of the car.

"I will find a way to be inside of you one way or another," he says as I stand in front of the trunk to get his luggage. Goosebumps form on my arm and I shiver.

"I am all for that," I say and he kisses me.

We walk inside and my parents come to greet Nathan. My mom gives him a hug while my dad shakes his hand. "Are you hungry, Nathan?" my dad asks.

"I am okay, sir," he says and my dad nods.

"Well we are heading off to bed, Ted is staying at the grandparents for tonight, Phoebe," my dad says and I look confused.

"He and your grandpa are going on a hike tomorrow morning," my dad shrugs.

"Oh okay well I love you both," I say giving my dad then mom a hug.

"Love you too, sweetheart," my mom says.

Nathan and I head upstairs. I hear my parent's room door shut and I look to Nathan. He takes my hand and leads me to the guest room. We both strip I am giggling as he is kissing my neck.

We get into the shower together and waste no time getting to it. Nathan is inside of me before I can get any words out. He has his arms wrapped around me pinning me against the wall.

"Fuck," he says as he thrusts in me. I am holding onto him tightly as if he would let me fall. I smile at the thought. This boy wouldn't let me get a scratch.

"What are you smiling about?" He asks slowing down and looking at me.

"Just how amazing you are," I say and hold his face in my hands and kiss him deeply.

Nathan returns to thrusting inside of me. I am building as the shower jets hit us. I come undone and soon after he is with me. He puts me down and holds me to steady me.

"Good?" He asks and I nod.

"Yes, I am amazing," I say.

"I know you are," he says and I blush looking down. We finish our shower and Nathan lays with me in my bed until I fall asleep.

I wake up on Christmas Eve and head downstairs. I am going to spend the day watching Christmas movies with Nathan. My parents are cooking dinner together this year. More like my mom cooks and yells at my dad for picking at the food.

I walk down to Nathan's room and knock on his door. I peek my head in and see he is asleep. I smile and walk over to him. I sit on the bed and stroke his hair. He looks so perfect like this.

"Mmmm hi," he says in his hot morning voice.

"Good morning, I'll be in the basement getting our movie day ready. Be there or be square," I say and kiss him.

I head downstairs wearing my Christmas PJs, I bring a bunch of snacks that Gail laid out the night before. I put on the Grinch first and bring a bunch of comfy blankets.

"There she is," Nathan says as he comes downstairs. I pat the seat next to me and he snuggles in.

"Hi baby," he kisses my head and I rest my head on his chest.

Our movie day is perfect. I would do it a thousand times over. We snuggle, kiss, and watch lots of Christmas movies. Not to mention the snacks. At 4 we head upstairs to shower and get ready.

I wear my thigh high heeled boots, black turtleneck sweater dress, and fur vest. Mia put the outfit together for me. I curl my hair and put on my makeup and perfume. After putting on my jewelry, I head downstairs.

When I get down there I see Nathan already talking and bonding with my family. He is talking to my grandparents. He has them both laughing. I stand there and look at the scene in front of me. This could not get more perfect.


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2

_**(Y'all have the patience of saints! I am not one to make excuses, but the reason this chapter took so long is because when I got to 15,000 words my computer crashed. That was two weeks ago. I was so frustrated that I had to take a bit of a break then rewrite it. To be honest I like this one better! Thank you all for understanding! XOXO) **_

_**(The PINTEREST is updated if you all want to look at that:)**_

_**JANUARY **_

Tomorrow is New Year's Eve. Also known as the annual Grey party. Nathan's family is invited this year. Nathan said they are coming and I am very nervous but also excited.

Right now, we are on his way to visit his baby cousin who was born yesterday. Nathan is driving and he has his hand on my thigh. I look over and put my hand on his and he gives me his beautiful smile.

"Gosh," I say.

"What's wrong," he asks.

"You are so fucking hot," I say he shakes his head laughing.

"I could say the same thing about you, my love," he says making me blush.

We get to the hospital and head up to the maternity ward. We are holding hands and Nathan swings our hands making me laugh. He is so cute sometimes.

We get our badges and go to Elise's room. Nathan knocks and peeks his head in. She gets so excited and tells us to come in. She is holding a pink little bundle.

"Look who's here to see you," Elise says. We walk over and the sweetest baby girl is in her arms. She is so tiny.

"Here babe, help Nate hold her," she says to her husband. She props herself up more and gives me a hug.

"I've missed you too," she says.

"We've missed you, how are you feeling?" I ask her.

"Like I gave birth yesterday, but am on cloud nine," she says and I smile. I look down at the little bundle Nathan is holding.

"Do we have a name?" Nathan asks. I smile looking up at them.

"Yes, this is Monroe Olivia, she was 5 lbs 13 oz," I smile down at the baby.

"She is so sweet," I say.

"Thank you, Nathan let Phoebe hold her," I sit down and Nathan passes me, Monroe. She is asleep and so sweet. Nathan gets a bunch of pictures of me holding her.

She wakes up and yawns looking at me. Oh my gosh, how precious. I can't wait to have a little baby to hold. Wait. Yes, I can, but I do love holding sweet little Monroe.

"So what are your guy's plans for New Years?" Elise asks.

"We are going to Phoebe's house. Her parents always threw a huge party," Nathan says and I smile.

"I'm jealous, I wanted Ms. Monroe to be a New Year's Eve baby, but she had plans of her own," Elise says smiling.

After Nathan and I take a picture with her we bid Elise goodbye. We walk out both having our newborn fill and both smelling like a baby. We walk out to the car and get in.

"What now sweets?" Nathan asks.

"Wanna go pick up my dress with me?" I ask him.

"Of course. Show me the way," he says. I had to get my dress shortened because they don't make long dresses for short people. The color scheme last year was gold, this year it is black and silver.

We go to Maria's Tailoring and I get out. I run inside and pay for my dress. After I come out and get into the car. "Good?" He asks and I nod smiling.

After Nathan takes me home and kisses me goodbye. He is so sweet. I spend the rest of the night prepping for tomorrow. I go to bed fairly early because I know it's going to be a late one tomorrow.

New Year's Eve before the party is a blur of getting the house ready. Then going to the salon and getting myself ready. Franco does my hair in Long beach waves. Then his assistant does my makeup. All while I am getting my nails painted. I do all black nails to go with my dress.

Two hours later I am pampered and ready to go. I head to the house. It is like a circus over here. The party is about to start and I have to get dressed. When I get there Nathan's car is there. I smile and walk inside. He is sitting talking to Gail.

"Look how gorgeous you look," he says coming over and kissing me. I get lipstick on his lips and wipe it off.

"Wanna come help me get dressed?" I ask him.

"Nothing would make me happier, but your parents," he says looking around.

"They are running around like chickens with their heads cut off," I say taking his hand we go upstairs to my room and I lock the door. Nathan is in his black tux looking amazing. I put on my nude thong and Nathan helps me out on my dress.

It is a black long dress with silver beading. It is tight to my body until about my knees then it flows out. It is absolutely beautiful. Nathan zips it up then kisses my back.

"This looks so good on you, you look absolutely stunning," he says watching me put my jewelry on. I smile and shake my head.

"What you don't believe me?" He asks. I shake my head. I don't even know what to say. I look fine, but he makes it seem like I am a whole new woman.

He comes behind me and wraps his arms around my waist in front of the mirror. He kisses my neck and I watch him. He presses himself against me and I can feel his hard member.

"You did that, you look so beautiful," he says and I blush looking at him through the mirror.

"Thank you, you flatter me too much," I say.

"I do not, look how beautiful you are," he says and tickles my stomach making me laugh.

"Let's go down there, your family should be here soon," I say and he nods. He takes my hand and we walk downstairs. We head outside to the tent and go inside. The whole tent is black and silver. It is so elegant.

Nathan and I spot his family. We walk over and I give his mom a hug. His dad and I shake hands. Berkeley is not with them tonight.

"Phoebe, you look beautiful," his mother says.

"Oh thank you, ma'am, so do you," I smile.

"Oh stop that, I wish Berkeley was here to see all of this. She wasn't feeling well tonight," I frown and see Nathan sigh and frown.

"Oh no, give her my best," I say.

"We will do that, now we are going to get a drink, you two have so much fun. Nathan, be good," she says. I smirk and hide my laughter. After Nathan and I walk over to Teddy.

"Hey Ted," Nathan says and shakes his hand.

"Hey man, how are you?" Teddy says giving him a bro hug.

"I'm great, it's good to see you. How are you?" Nathan asks.

"Lonely tonight without a date, you're lucky you have a pretty cute one," Ted says. I laugh and Nathan wraps an arm around me.

"I am very lucky, I have a stunning date tonight," he says and I smile.

"Better treat her right, Moore," my brother says and Nathan holds me close.

"Trust me, I wouldn't dream of not," he says. Teddy sees one of his friends and walks over to them. Nathan gets us both drinks. He gets a coke and I get a club soda. Everyone thinks it is so gross drinking it plain, but I love it.

"Thanks for being here tonight," I say kissing him. He smiles and cups my cheek.

"What's wrong?" I ask. I can see it in his eyes he is worried about something.

"Oh nothing," he says and smiles. That means there is something wrong.

"Is that a learned behavior from me? Lying about nothing being wrong," I ask and he laughs.

"Must be, you are quite contagious. I just am not up for talking about it right now," he says and I nod. Even though it is killing me I respect that.

"Okay, I am here if you need me," I say and he smiles. It doesn't quite reach his eyes though. All of a sudden we are hit with the storm that is Ava Grey.

"Oh my gosh, holy shit, Phoebe," she says.

"What? What's wrong?" I ask.

"You look amazing, I thought you were someone else. I didn't even recognize you, have you lost weight? Your body is amazing," she says. I blush looking down. Nathan frowns at the weight loss comment.

"Umm no I haven't tried to, but thank you. You look beautiful too," I say and she smiles.

"Thanks, Tyler said this dress makes me look tan, but that could also be the spray tan," she says and I laugh.

"Where is Tyler?" I ask.

"Talking to my dad about basketball," she says and I smile.

"I should go find him, I just saw you and had to tell you. Nathan, you look great too. More muscular if it's possible," Ava says and if it were anyone else I would think they were flirting, but Ava is just being Ava.

"Well that was something," Nathan says as she walks away.

"That's Ava for you," I say and he laughs. He puts his hand on the small of my back taking a sip of his drink.

As the night goes on I can tell Nathan is checking his phone a lot and looking more worried. I have no clue what's going on in that brain of his. At around 11, he gets a call. He kisses my head and tells me to wait while he takes it.

I watch as he walks over to the edge of the tent. It is short and I can see something is very wrong. He rushes over to me and my stomach drops.

"I have to go really quick, baby. I will be back," he says and I get up grabbing his hand and walking out of the tent.

"Phoebe, I really have to go," he says. What could possibly be wrong?

"Then I am going with you," I say. Nathan sighs rubbing his head.

"Baby stay here," he says and I can tell he is losing patience.

"Nathan, you would never let me leave my house alone. Come on please," I say. He sighs and I know he knows I am right.

"Fine, but we need to go now. Go tell your parents," he says.

"They are so busy, they won't even know we left," I say.

"Come on," he says and we walk out. We go through my house. We start walking to his car. There are so many cars here.

"I parked far down," he says holding my hand. He is walking so fast. I am running in my heels to keep up with him. It is freezing out. The tent was so warm. He turns and sees me. He stops and takes off his suit jacket putting it in me. After we continue speed walking.

"Thank you," I say. We get to his car and I snuggle into his jacket. I am so stressed out.

"Can you tell me what's happening?" I ask quietly.

"Berkeley decided to get super drunk at a party. Her friend called me and said they are worried," he says. Oh no. Overprotective brother. Nathan speeds off.

We arrive at a house about 10 minutes away from mine. We park and Nathan opens the door for me. He puts his hand at the small of my back and we start walking, well me running him fast walking into the house. We knock on the door and a bunch of eyes peek out the window. Oh to be a sophomore again. I didn't drink until my junior year.

Finally, a girl answers the door. "Hi Nathan," she says shyly. I can tell she is scared. She is in a sparkly shirt and black jeans. She definitely has been drinking.

"Where is she?" Nathan asks. I can tell he is pissed.

"Woah Woah Woah who are these people and why are they in my house?" A kid their age asks talking about Nathan and me.

"Jack, they are here to get Berkeley stop?" The girl who opened the door shyly says. The vein in Nathan's neck is popping. He is mad. We probably look insane being in a long designer dress and a tuxedo in their party.

"She's fine, Quinn is taking care of her," he laughs. Before I can stop him Nathan slams the kid against the wall. Everyone goes silent.

"Where the fuck is my sister? You have two seconds before I punch you in the fucking face," Nathan spits out. I go up to Nathan and try to pull him back but he shakes me off. I lose balance on my heel and fall on my butt.

"She's upstairs, the first room to the left," he says and his voice shakes. Nathan drops him as soon as he hears me fall.

"Oh my god, Phoebe," he says feeling horrible for knocking me over.

"No, let's go get Berkeley," I say sliding my heels off. I feel like a movie with all the kids watching me.

We run upstairs and go into the bathroom. Nathan barges in almost breaking the door. He says "fuck" as he sees. I move him to the side and come in. Berkeley is in a tiny silver dress with it hiked up to her hips as she is vomiting into the toilet. A guy stands behind looking more at her exposed butt than helping her.

"You have one second to get the fuck out of here," Nathan says.

"Chill bro, she's sloppy tonight," he laughs walking out. If Berkeley wasn't in such bad shape I am sure Nathan would have run after him and thrown him out a window.

I rush to Berkeley and bend down. I am still in my dress so I can only bend so low. She looks at me and I can see in her eyes she is very drunk. "Phoebe," she slurs out confused.

"Yes I am here, how much have you had to drink?" I ask her. She points to the bottle of vodka with three-quarters of the liquid gone. Oh no.

"Berkeley, what the hell were you thinking? You could have been hurt. Now Phoebe and I are missing our New Year's Eve to come save your ass," Nathan says with his hands on his hips. He is pissed. Berkeley immediately starts to cry.

"I'm I'm I'm sor sor sorry," she tries to slur out. I know for a fact him yelling at her will make this so much worse.

"Nathan, let's get her out of here. Yelling will do no good," I say. I slip off Nathan's jacket and put it around her. All of a sudden she starts vomiting again. I am quick to hold her hair and Nathan cones rubbing her back.

"Are you done?" Nathan asks. She nods and we start to try and help her up. I pull her dress down. We start trying to walk with her and see it's no use.

"I'll carry her," Nathan says and I grab her phone and bag as he lifts her into his arms. We walk downstairs and the girls all try to come and see her. Some friends they are.

"Guys she's fine, go downstairs," I say as we walk out. I get in the back and Nathan lays her down with me. Her head goes in my lap. He passes me a bag in case she throws up.

He starts driving. Every so often I feel his eyes look at mine through the rearview mirror. As I look at him our eyes meet and then his go back to the road.

After 15 minutes and Berkeley throwing up once, we get to his house. "I'll pick her up," Nathan says. Berkeley tries to talk but is crying too hard.

"Shh Berk, you're okay," I say. We walk inside and go up to her room. Nathan puts her on her bed. She looks rough.

"Berkeley, where did you even get such a dress," Nathan rubs his temples.

"Why don't I get her changed. You go get some water and crackers, maybe a bucket," I say. Nathan sighs and looks at her.

"I got her baby," I say. He kisses my head not saying anything and walking out.

I grab a pair of her sweatpants and a T-shirt. Here goes nothing. "Berk, I am going to help you change," I say.

"I I can do it," she says. Oh lord. She sits up and I have to hold her up while I unzip her dress. I slip on her T-shirt and then pull down her dress. It is so tight and tiny.

"Stop, I got it," she slurs out. I can barely understand her.

"Berk, let me help you," I sigh. She tries to feed her legs through her sweats put is doing it wrong. I have to put each leg in a pant leg than pull it up. Once she is dressed she starts to cry.

"What's going on?" I ask her as I wrap an arm around her.

"Nathan hates me," she cries. I know she is drunk, but I can't help but believe she has been worried about her and Nathan's relationship.

"Berk, Nathan loves you so much. More than me, more than anything in this entire world. Why would you say that?" I ask her.

"No, he doesn't, you you took my spot. He never calls me, he never visits me, only you," she says crying. I know she is drunk, but I still feel so bad.

Nathan walks in and sees her crying. He has ice water and a bunch of crackers with a bucket in his arms. I help him set the stuff down.

"Would you mind if I talked to Berk?" Nathan asks. I think he heard the end of our conversation.

"Of course," I say kissing him then walking out. I go to Nathan's room. I sit on his bed and look at the picture of us from junior year he has hanging in his room. We are at dinner that was our 6-month anniversary date. We both look so young. It is so crazy how fast time moves.

After waiting a while I lay back on Nathan's bed. Soon after he walks in he has his suit jacket off and bow tie off. His dress shirt has the first two buttons undone and his sleeves are rolled up to his elbows. He looks distraught but so sexy.

"She's asleep, I had her take some Advil so the hangover isn't as bad tomorrow," he says and sits down next to me.

"You're such a good big brother to her," I say and rub his bare arm.

"She told me I left her, and that she has never felt so alone," he says. "That I never come home to visit her, and you took her spot," he says. I frown and look at him.

"Baby, you had to leave for college. And with basketball season there is no way that you could have visited. You are so good to her, don't worry," I say. Nathan nods and holds my hand.

"I was so angry, I pushed you off me and you fell. Fuck, Phoebe, I touched you in a way I promised I would never," he says.

"Nathan, don't even do that to yourself," I say and he shakes his head.

"No, none of that. I lost my balance and fell. It was not your fault, you didn't lay a hand on me," I say. He rubs his face in his hands and looks at me.

"You are such a good brother, boyfriend, son and every other hat you wear. You need to stop worrying," I say and he nods. This poor boy.

"I love you so much," he says and I smile. I take his face in my hands and kiss him.

"I'm not ready to leave you," he says.

"Neither am I, but let's not talk about that right now," I say. My dress is so uncomfortable and I want out. I move a little bit to give me comfort.

"You looked absolutely stunning tonight," Nathan says rubbing circles on my back. "This dress looked like it was made for you," he says. I decide to be cheeky in spite of the situation.

"You know where the dress would look better?" I ask him. He shrugs looking at me.

"The floor," I say. Nathan looks at me shocked for one second before he is behind me unzipping my dress. He leaves the trail of the zipper with small kisses down my back. I take a big breath that I was holding once it is unzipped.

"Can I take this off?" Nathan asks. I nod and slices it down my front. My nipples harden at the cold air that hits them.

I smile and lay down on the bed. Nathan crawls on top of me and starts kissing me hard. My panties have been wet all night because of how hot he has looked.

Nathan hooks his fingers in my panties and slides them down. He kisses the inside of both of my thighs before getting where I need him to be.

He starts sucking and licking and kissing. I am a withering mess on the bed. He puts his fingers in me and starts pumping them in and out. I bite my hand trying to keep myself from screaming.

I feel him watching me and I look at him. His eyes and face are filled with lust. My hips start to buck and he holds them down. It is so forceful and hot. Before I can finish because I am so close Nathan climbs on me and replaces his fingers with his dick.

"Oh my gosh," I grip onto him. I am building and all sensations. Every little movement I can feel.

"Nathan," I cry out.

"Feel it, baby," he says and my eyes close as I moan out.

Nathan changes his paces and it brings me closer to the edge every single time. I'm so close. My nails are digging into his back and I am moaning his name.

"Please," I cry out.

"Just let go," Nathan says. And on his command, I am falling over the edge. This is one of the strongest orgasms I have ever had. Nathan finishes with me soon after.

I am a panting and sticky mess as I lay on his bed. I smile and turn to look at the clock. "It's midnight," I laugh.

"What a damn good way to start the new year," he says and kisses me.

—-

I am back at school this week and so excited to see everyone. I walk into my dorm room for the first time and drop my suitcase when Olivia, Maisy, Regan, and Kendra all pile on top of me hugging me. I was the last one back.

"Phoebe, how was break," Kendra asks as I set my bag down on my bed to unpack.

"Amazing, but it is so good to be back. How were you guys?" I ask them.

"I got laid once a day and drank my own weight in alcohol," Maisy says. I turn around and see if she's joking. Low and behold she's not. I start laughing.

"You would," Olivia says.

"So where are we going tonight?" Regan asks.

"Hmm theta chi is having a party, we could pregame at Kora's," Kendra says. Kora is her big.

"Yeah for sure, let's do that," Olivia says.

"I wanna wear my new shirt," I say and Olivia smiles.

"Is that the shirt that Nathan bought you?" Liv asks.

"Maybe," I smirk.

"You are so whipped, Phoebe," Regan jokes.

"If I am then I am happy to be it," I say and they all laugh.

"Okay ladies everyone gets ready and meet back here at 8, then we'll walk to Kora's," Olivia says.

I head to shower and get ready for tonight. I get in the shower and wash my hair and shave. I get out and go into my room. I put on my bathrobe and begin to do my hair. I am curling it for tonight.

Olivia comes in and sits next to me. We turn up our speaker and do our makeup next to each other. This is what I have missed most. We jam out to our favorite songs and get ready.

I finish my makeup and hair and put on the shirt that Nathan bought me. I wanted it so bad but didn't end up buying it because I thought I didn't need it. When I came home it was on my bed with a note that said you deserve the world. My sweet boy.

I put on the army green silk camisole and black high waisted jeans. I put on my Gucci belt and pair it with black booties.

"Damn you look good, PG," Olivia says.

"So do you, those jeans are adorable," I say. She is in a white crop top and high waisted blue jeans. They are so cute.

"We need to get pictures tonight so we can hang one on our door," Olivia says.

"Yes for sure, let's do it before we go out," I say.

Maisy, Regan, and Kendra all come over. We take a bunch of pictures before we head out to go to Kora's apartment. It is a short walk to get to the tall apartment buildings. We head up the elevator to the 11th floor where she lives. You hear the loud music before you get to the room.

When we walk in there is a bunch of girls from my sorority and from Olivia's. I grab a drink and walk up to Taylor who is Caroline's roommate. Caroline hasn't really talked about the whole Teddy situation so I am hoping to avoid it. I'm not mad at her anymore, I just want it to blow over.

"Grey, how are you?" Taylor asks giving me the biggest hug.

"I am amazing, how was your break?" I ask her.

"Caroline and I were together almost the whole time," she laughs.

"Sounds so fun," I say.

"Speak of the Devil," Taylor says and from behind me, Caroline walks up.

"Oh my little," she says and wraps me in a big hug spinning me around.

"Caroline, how are you oh my gosh," I ask her.

"So good and so drunk. I am always so happy to see you," she says.

"Are you going to theta chi's party after this, who am I kidding of course you are," she says and I laugh.

"You have a birthday next week?" She asks and I nod smiling.

"January 23rd," I say and she claps her hands smiling.

"Oh, I am throwing you the best party ever. You won't even know what hit you," she says and that makes me nervous.

"Birthday drinks and sex," she says and I raise my eyebrows.

"Okay birthday drinks," she says and I smile laughing.

"You don't have to throw me a party," I say.

"Don't even try that with me, Grey. After what I put you through we are throwing you a party," she says.

"About that, you really don't have to worry about it," I say.

"Well, I do because I upset you. I really liked your brother, I mean I really do like him still, but I wouldn't want to do that to you again," oh no. Tell me it was just a one-time thing.

"Have you guys talked since?" I ask.

"No, but I've thought about him. What is it with you Grey's and being freaking heart breakers," she says laughing. I know she is serious though. I don't want to be the one stopping them, but that's my brother.

"You should text him or something, just please no sex without a door locked," I say.

"Technically it was locked you just walked in," she says.

"Shut it," I smirk.

We keep drinking until I am drunk. We all walk over to Theta Chi together. Caroline has one of my elbows and Olivia is on the other side. When we walk in there is thumping techno music playing. I've never been to this house before.

Caroline leads us to where the drinks are and we all make ourselves some. I grab a mike's hard lemonade for myself. It's in a huge black can. I pour some in a cup then leave the can.

As I walk away a guy walks up and grabs my arm. I turn to see Josh the guys Caroline introduced me to at our first frat party. He is the president of his frat. He was the one that was trying to flirt with me. Ew.

"Phoebe Grey, it has been a while," he says.

"Josh Shipley," I say as I take a sip of my drink.

"How have you been?" He asks as he gives me a hug. It goes on a little longer than necessary.

"I have been good, I got back from Seattle a couple of hours ago," I say and he smiles.

"How was your break?" He asks.

"It was good, yours?" I ask.

"Great, I missed this though," he says looking around at all the partying college kids.

"So when are you going to take me up on my offer of dinner?" He asks. Oh yeah, the last party before break he asked me to dinner. Not in a way that Andrew did but in a let's go out on a date way. Speaking of Andrew, where is he?

"Let me get settled in before jumping down my throat, Shipley," I say making him laugh. I hope that takes him down a few notches.

"Fine fine, Grey, but when you are ready you know where to find me," he says and I nod smiling.

When I walk away with him I come face to face with no other than my best friend, Andrew Thomas. He smiles when he sees me and wraps his arms around me.

"Phoebe, holy shit. How are you?" He asks.

"So good, I missed you," I say.

"I missed you too, kid. You are very drunk," he says.

"How do you know?" I ask him.

"Because whenever you're drunk you don't talk you scream," he says. I start laughing and take a sip of my drink.

"I'm walking you home tonight, deal?" He asks.

"Of course," I smile.

"Okay go find Maisy she was looking for you, but don't forget to grab me before you leave," he says and I nod. I push my way through the crowd to Maisy. She stands there smiling and talking to a class act frat boy.

"You wanted me?" I ask her.

"Yeah, I was talking to Reed and he had said he'd never met you, I wanted to introduce you guys," she says. Maisy will never understand I have a boyfriend.

"Oh well, umm hi I'm Phoebe Grey," I smile.

"Reed Rander, you look great tonight," he says. Oh wow, we are just going in for the kill. I look to Maisy and her face is bright red. She pretends she sees someone she knows and walks off. She knows I will kill her when we are alone.

"Thank you, where are you from?" I ask him. I take a big gulp of my drink.

"I'm from Park City in Utah. What about you?" He asks.

"Seattle," I tell him.

"Wait a second, you aren't Phoebe grey as in Grey Enterprises," he says. Oh lord help me.

"Yep," I say. He laughs and looks around.

"Shit, holy shit," he says. "We just looked at one of your dad's business deals in class," he says.

"Oh cool," I say.

"Can I get you a drink?" He asks. I look down at my almost empty drink.

"Umm, sure yeah. Thank you," I say handing him my cup. He goes off and I am left with my cup.

From across the room, I see Andrew. My vision is a little bit blurry because I am so drunk. I didn't even realize how low my tolerance has gotten. That's what I get for not drinking for almost 3 weeks.

Reed comes back with my drink in his hand. I take it and thank him. We keep talking about my dad and he is boring me to tears. As I go to take a sip my drink is pushed out of my hand and falls to the floor. I look up to see the culprit and it is Andrew. Confused doesn't even begin.

"We need to go," he says. I look at him and am confused. What the fuck? I mean I'll go to not have to talk to him.

"Okay nice meeting you, Reed," I say and he looks less than happy for me to be leaving. I say goodbye to all my friends and Andrew and I walk out.

"What was that about?" I ask.

"Phoebe, are you crazy?" He asks.

"Not that I know of no," I say. I can tell he is trying not to laugh.

"You can't take drinks from strangers. Especially kids like Reed. He is creepy and definitely was trying to take you home," he says.

"I didn't even think about that, I am so stupid," I say. Especially after what happened in Florida.

"Don't make me have to watch your every move, Grey," he says and I laugh.

"I won't I promise, I have already had an experience with that, it won't happen again," I say.

"What do you mean had an experience like that?" He says. Oh boy, I don't want to get into this I am too drunk.

"Did someone drug you?" He asks. We are at my dorm and I am tempted to just run inside.

"Yeah, but it was my fault," I say. Tears well in my eyes and Andrew takes my key and scans us in the building.

"Come on, kid," he says and wraps an arm around me. When we get to my room he opens the door. He puts my key back in my bag and sits on the couch as I lay in my bed.

"Phoebe, are you okay?" He asks as he walks over and sees my teary eyes.

"I'm fine, just thinking about bad memories," I say.

"Do you want to talk about it?" He asks and I shake my head. He brings me in a tight hug and kisses my head.

"I'm always here for you, Grey," he says and I nod.

"Thank you, for being here," I say and he rubs my back.

—-

"Shhh shh don't wake her up," I hear. All of a sudden a confetti popper is shot and I about jump through the ceiling.

"Happy birthday to you," I hear people singing. When I open my eyes I look to see all my friends singing to me. Caroline, Maisy, Regan, Olivia, Emily, Kendra, and Ellen are all singing.

"Oh my gosh guys," I laugh. "Thank you," I say as they pass me a coffee and a donut from my favorite place.

"Happy birthday, you bitch," Olivia says jumping on me and hugging me.

"You are going to be so wasted tonight," she says and I shake my head.

"First I have to have lunch with my parents," I say and she rolls her eyes.

"Then we are doing cake and presents then we are getting you fucked up," she says and I laugh.

"Half of you have class to get to so don't be late but, thank you guys really," I say smiling. They all give me hugs and head out. After drinking my coffee and eating my donut with Olivia, I head to shower.

My parents are coming down today to have lunch with me. They originally weren't then my dad refused to not see me on my birthday. After I shower I get out and put on a cute bralette, a big sweater, and jeans.

Olivia is gone by the time I am back in my room and I do my makeup and hair. After I am done I have 10 minutes till I need to meet my parents. I check down at my phone to see if Nathan has texted me. When I don't see a text or call I am a little hurt. Maybe he isn't up yet.

I head downstairs and walk outside to see my parent's car pull up. I smile as my dad rushes out and speeds over to me. "My birthday Bubs," he says and hugs me tightly. It's been two weeks since we have seen each other. Even though it doesn't sound like a lot it is.

"Happy birthday, my sweet girl," my mom says.

"Thank you so much," I say.

After lots of hugs, we get into the car and head out to the Heathman Hotel. At the top the nice restaurant that we are going to. We ride up the elevator and get seated.

"How has your birthday been so far?" My mom asks smiling.

"It has been great, my friends woke me up with a donut and coffee from The Brew, which is my favorite coffee shop on campus, then I showered and got ready to go," I say. My mom smiles and nods.

"That's great, Bubs. What are you guys doing tonight?" My dad asks.

"We are going to my Big's apartment and then going out," I say smiling. We order our drinks as the guy comes over. I get an unsweetened iced tea.

"Iced tea? That's new," my mom says.

"I love it, Olivia drinks it all the time," I say and she nods.

"How is everything with school?" My dad asks.

"It's great, I love all my classes. They are fascinating," I say. My dad smiles.

"I am so glad you love them, Bubs," he says. He comes back with our drinks and I take a big sip. After we order our food. I get the lobster bisque with a Caesar salad.

"Oh I forgot to tell you, Dad, I met a guy who is in the business school here and he said he studied one of your deals," he says.

"Really? Must have been the carbon disclosure project," My dad says and my mom looks over at me shrugging.

"Yeah, he was shocked to meet me. You are like a celebrity to the kids in business school," I say and he laughs shaking his head.

"That's funny to hear, Bubs," he says.

"How is everything at home?" I ask them.

"Pretty boring. We both work, then come home and eat dinner together," my mom says.

"Gosh, you make it sound like a prison," my dad says and I laugh.

"Oh don't get your panties in a twist, you know what I mean. Much less lively without you and Theodore there," she says and I nod.

"She is right, how is Nathan? Have you heard from him today?" My mom asks. I check my phone to make sure.

"Um actually no, he hasn't called yet, but I am sure he will when he wakes up," I say.

"Wakes up? It's 1:30," my dad says.

"He is on college time, honey. Don't worry sweets," my mom says. Nathan doesn't sleep in ever. But I pretend he does and nod.

"Oh, I totally forgot I have this for you," my mom says and goes in her purse. She pulls out an envelope and hands it to me. I look on the back and smile. I instantly know who it is from. In scribbled letters, it says "Bee Bee"

I open the letter to find a handwritten note from the Cruz kids. Mrs. Cruz wrote the note, but the kid's sweet signatures are below.

Bee Bee,

Happy birthday we miss you so so so so so much. Drew took his first steps last week! He still seems to think that crawling is a better mode of transportation though. Spencer knows how to spell her name which you can see below and wants to tell you she loves you. Quinn is working on reading bigger books now and wants to tell you that he thought you looked pretty. Not really sure what that means, but it's Quinn. Charlie started basketball practice and absolutely loves it. He says he is going to be like Nathan one day. Happy birthday, Phoebe! We miss you so much.

Love, the Cruz's

Inside is a check for $200 and a picture of the kids. That is so sweet of them to do for me. I will have to call and thank them. I study the picture. Drew is placed in Charlie's lap who has his arms around him. Quinn has an arm around Charlie and Spencer who is laid across the front. Crazy kids. They all look so much bigger. I miss them.

"Oh my gosh," I say and smile down at it.

"Thank you for bringing this," I say as our food gets delivered.

"No problem, they came over for dinner last weekend and Spencer was your dad's shadow," my mom says showing me a picture. Spencer is on my dad's hip with her head rested on his shoulder while he talks to Mrs. Cruz.

"She loves Dad so much," I laugh.

We eat our food and talk more about school and life. It is so good to have them here. After we eat our lunch they take me back to my dorm. I invite them in because I know Olivia is in class right now.

"It's pretty clean in here," my mom says and I laugh. They both sit on the couch. My mom hands me a wrapped present and I thank her.

I open it and find four plane tickets all to California. I am confused and look up. "For spring break we want you to bring 3 people to our house in California," my dad says.

"Oh my gosh, thank you so much, I don't even know what to say," I say as I hug them both. I am so excited.

"You guys didn't have to do that," I say.

After I open the rest of my presents my parents head out. It was a hard goodbye, but I know I will see them soon. I lay on my bed and check my phone still no Nathan. I sigh and decide to call him.

It rings all the way through with no response. I text him again. If he forgot I'll be sad, but I do just want him to be okay. I lay in bed upset. He would never forget my birthday I don't think.

—-

"Come on Pheebs, we are going out after cake and presents it's your birthday and you got already," Olivia says. It's official Nathan forgot my birthday. I just don't feel like going out after this. We've been dating for two years now. How does he forget?

"Okay my present first," Maisy says. She hands me a wrapped gift and I smile thanking her. I open it to find the cutest picture of us framed in what looks like a Tiffany frame.

"Oh my gosh, Mase, thank you so much," I say and hug her.

"Now mine now mine, Regan says," I smile thanking her. I open it to find the cutest ring. It is an opal ring with a rose gold band. So freaking cute. I slide it on my finger and hug her.

After Kendra gets me a makeup palette and Ella gets me a keychain with a P on it for my car keys, everyone looks to Olivia. Oh, this should be good.

"Okay my present isn't wrapped, Pheebs I'm sorry," she says.

"Do not even apologize you butt face," I say and she laughs.

"Okay my present is behind our door," she says. I look to our door confused.

"Is it an animal, please don't say you got us a lizard. I was drunk not being serious," I say and she laughs.

"You wished I loved you enough to get you a lizard," she says making me laugh.

"Fine… okay," I say

"On 3, 1….2...3," I open the door and my mouth drops open.

"Hi Bee," I hear out of his mouth. I am in shock. I look to Olivia and she takes a picture of me. Everyone in the room is laughing. I look up at Nathan and he is laughing.

I rush to Olivia and hug her but playfully slap her arm. "I can't believe you, I thought he forgot my birthday," I say and wipe the tears from my eyes.

"Well I hope you enjoy this and the fact that I am sleeping at Cara's apartment," she says and winks. I am in shock. I can't believe this.

"Well, are you going to say hi to him?" She asks and I turn looking at Nathan standing there watching me. I start tearing up and nod.

I walk up to him and he smiles wrapping his arms around me. "Happy birthday, my girl," he says and kisses my head. I listen as the girls sneak out while we have a moment.

"I thought you forgot," I cry as I look up at him. He cups my face and wipes my tears with his thumbs.

"Phoebe Grace, you must think very lowly of me to forget my favorite day of the year," he says and I laugh going back to hugging him. I look up at him and kiss him. He smiles at me.

"I probably look a mess now," I say and look in the mirror. I wipe under my eyes and clean myself up.

"Quite the opposite, birthday girl," he says. His hands run over my top. I am wearing a two-piece outfit with a crop top and a tight skirt. It is a black and white checkered pattern. I have a black fuzzy jacket over it. Outfit credits going to Kendra. She always knows what to wear.

"I like this outfit," he says and kisses my neck.

"Thank you, I can't believe you are here," I say.

"Nowhere else I would be, now let's go celebrate you," he says and kisses me.

We walk out and all 6 of them are sitting there waiting. "You guys good?" Maisy asks. We both nod and Nathan takes my hand. We get lots of pictures together. I post one of Nathan and me.

We walk to Caroline's apartment. As I walk in confetti poppers and champagne is popped. I laugh and look to Nathan who kisses my head.

"Happy birthday, little," Caroline screams and about jumps on me hugging me.

"Thank you so much," I smile laughing. There is champagne and margaritas flowing.

"Now who is this?" She asks looking at Nathan.

"This is my boyfriend, Nathan. You know the one you try to get me to cheat on every once and a while," I whisper the second part to her and it sends her laughing.

"Oh my gosh, you picked a funny one Nathan. Nice to meet you, I am Caroline Phoebe's big," she says and I smile.

"Nice to meet you, Caroline. I did pick a great one," he says wrapping an arm around my stomach. She looks at me and smiles.

"We'll drink and enjoy. Grey, you have 19 minutes to get drunk before I force feed you alcohol," she says and I laugh.

"Sounds good, thank you again, Caroline. It means a lot," I say and she smiles. Nathan and I both grab margaritas and drink them. They are so good, I don't know how Caroline pulled this off so well.

"Grey," I hear and I smile at the voice. It's Andrew and he is here.

"Andrew," I say and put my drink down so I can hug him.

"Happy birthday," he says as he hugs me.

"Thank you, I have someone you might want to meet," I say. "This is Nathan Moore the one I cry to when I am drunk," I joke and they both laugh remembering one of our first encounters.

"Hey man, nice to meet in person," Andrew says as they do their dude greeting thing.

"Nice to meet you too, thanks for keeping this a surprise," Nathan says.

"Anytime man," he says. Wait what? Did he know?

"You knew he was coming?" I turn to Andrew and ask.

"Of course I did, and don't even try to be angry at me," he says. Nathan laughs and I glare at him.

"I was just complaining to you about how much I missed him," I say.

"And that's what makes the surprise even better, now have another margarita," he says and grabs me one. I smirk and drink the margarita finishing it and handing him the glass.

"Jesus, at least I'm not on walking home duty," he says and Nathan looks down at me.

"Should be an interesting night for me," Nathan teases. Andrew gets whisked away by a girl and we are left talking.

"Can I say happy birthday to the woman of the hour," I hear a familiar voices. Shit.

"Hi Josh," I say.

"Happy birthday little Grey," he says wrapping an arm around me. I see Nathan's jaw click.

"Thank you, Josh," I say.

"So who is this?" He asks looking at Nathan.

"I'm Nathan Moore, Phoebe's boyfriend," he says and I smirk at territorial Nathan coming out. Josh's arm stays around me until he shakes Nathan's hand. I take that as my opportunity to sneak away from him and go over to Nathan who yanks me closer to him.

"Nice to meet you, I am Josh. I supply Phoebe with lots of alcohol and parties. I am the president of my frat," he says as it makes him a big shot.

"Well I'm glad you keep her entertained," Nathan says and it takes everything in me not to laugh.

"Yeah, well hey nice meeting you man. I got a girl over there," he says and walks off.

"Jeez you might as well get me a tattoo that says taken," I say and he shakes his head.

"You are mine," he says and leans down kissing me. I smirk and look up at him.

"That's very presumptuous, Mr. Moore," I say.

"Watch it, birthday girl," he smiles and I laugh.

We keep drinking and dancing. It is so much fun and I end up getting more drunk than I should. I am having trouble standing without swaying so Nathan has an arm wrapped tightly around me.

"Yes that's my little," Caroline says as she walks by. I giggle as Nathan takes a big sip of his beer.

"PG, look at you," Olivia says coming up to me. I laugh and hug her tightly.

"Oh gosh, you really are hammered," she says and I laugh.

"I just want to thank you for him," I say and point to Nathan who smiles.

"Anytime, Grey. And besides, if I heard you say you missed him one more time I would have had to walk to New Jersey to get him," she says making me laugh. I guess I really did miss him a lot.

"I love you," I say and she laughs. I walk over to Nathan and grip his wrist so I can see the time.

"3 am, wow," I say and laugh. "I need another drink," I say. Nathan grabs my waist.

"No more drinks for you, my sweet girl," he says and I pout.

"I know you if you have one more I will be holding your hair all night," he says and I smirk.

"You are right," I say and yawn.

"We should head back," he says and I smile.

"To have sex?" I ask.

"We'll see, come on," he smirks.

After many goodbye hugs, we are out walking. Nathan is holding my hand and we are laughing about how I cried when I saw him. This is perfect.

When we get to my dorm I lay on my bed. "Come have sex with me," I say fumbling with my skirt button trying to get it off. Nathan is standing over me laughing.

"Can I help you there?" Nathan asks and I nod smiling. He helps me take off my jacket, top, and skirt. I am left in my panties and I smile up at Nathan.

"Now can we have sex?" I ask opening my legs.

"When you are sober you won't let me watch you change, you are brazen when you are drunk," he says.

"Uh huh, less talking more sex," I laugh.

"No sex tonight, but I am going to make you orgasm," he says as he crawls on top of me. He starts kissing my neck and my panties dampen.

"Mmm," I moan and squirm under him. He goes to my boobs and sucks and teases them. I giggle as it tickles a little bit.

"Shhh feel it, baby," he says as he sucks and nips down my stomach. My panties are soaked by the time he puts his nose there and inhales.

"You smell good enough to eat," he says and I laugh. He pulls off my panties and opens my thighs to him. I stare up at the ceiling as he teases me running a finger up and down the slit.

"Ahhh," I cry out.

"Watch me," he says and I put my head on my pillow and watch as his mouth connects with the most sensitive part of my body.

"Nathan," I cry out.

It feels so good. Watching him makes it all the more intense. My hips start to buck so he holds them down and I am left just getting so much pleasure.

"Nathan," I cry out. He adds a finger and I about convulse on the spot.

"Come for me," He says and his words are my undoing. My hips shoot up and I am hit with a powerful orgasm.

After Nathan cleans me up and puts a big T-shirt on me. He takes off my makeup and puts my hair in a bun. After he climbs in bed in his PJs and holds me.

This was the best birthday ever. I am so lucky to live this life. I put my face in the crook of Nathan's shoulder and he holds me tightly. This is my favorite place.

_**FEBRUARY **_

Nathan stayed to my surprise for 2 more days. The amount of sex that has been had is crazy. I am so tired but so happy. Who knew two weeks away from someone is enough to go mad.

We are laying in bed it is 9 am. His flight leaves at 9 tonight, so I have a couple of hours today with my boy. I decided we are going to go into town and hang out.

We are both naked and he has an arm around me tightly. My head is on his chest and it raises and lowers as he breathes. He strokes my hair and kisses my head occasionally.

"I don't want you to go," I admit. He laughs and rubs my back.

"I don't want to go," he says.

"Then don't," I say already knowing the answer I am going to get.

"Bee, I have classes and basketball. Trust me if I could stay here all year I would," he says.

"I know, I know," I say.

"Mmm why don't we enjoy this day together," he says lifting me up more so I am on him.

"I need a shower," I say.

"You still look beautiful," he says and I smirk.

"Yeah, nice try. I'll be back, you can use Olivia coffee machine if you want," I say and he smiles.

I walk out with my towel and my shower stuff. I head down to the showers and get in. I wash my hair and body. After I shave and rinse myself off. When I am done I dry off and put my robe on.

When I come back in my room Nathan is dressed and drinking a cup of coffee. "Look at you making yourself at home," I smirk and he laughs.

"This coffee is amazing," he says making me smile. I shake my head and sit down at my desk. I start blowing dry my hair and I feel a pair of eyes watching me. I look over to Nathan and he is smiling watching. I stick my tongue out at him and keep drying my hair.

After I am finished I put it up in a high ponytail. I put on some mascara leave it at that. Nathan always says I look the most beautiful with no makeup, so I'll go by his words today. After I throw on a colorful sweater and jeans that are ripped at the knee. Nathan watches my every move and it makes me laugh.

"Okay ready?" I ask and he nods. We are having Sawyer drive us to town. I put on my coat and we walk out.

Once we get in the car we buckle up. Sawyer and Nathan talk about basketball and all that jazz. I on the other hand just listen along. I love watching Nathan, but that is where my love for the sport ends.

It is a short drive and I hear both of our stomachs rumbling by the end of it. We head to a little breakfast place called Besa. It has all types of omelets, pancakes, and breakfast foods. Olivia and I go here sometimes on Sundays.

"This place is so cool," he says as he looks around at the decorations. It has big grey stone walls and dark wood tables. Very pretty inside.

"I know, the food is nothing short of amazing too," I say and he smiles.

"What are you going to get?" He asks reading over the menu.

"I think the Greek yogurt parfait and fruit platter," I say.

"That's all? What about getting an omelet or something more filling," he suggests. Oh no, not this again.

"No I am okay, the Greek yogurt is huge too," I say. Nathan looks up at me then down at his menu. Pick your battles, Phoebe.

We order our food and I look out the window. Downtown Vancouver is beautiful. I love it here. Nathan takes my hand from across the table and rubs it. "You look beautiful," he says and I smile.

"Thank you, you don't look too bad yourself," I smile.

"What's on tap for when I leave?" He asks.

"Well, we have Valentine's Day party coming up. We do it with our brother frat. Andrew and I are going together. I am so glad you got to meet him in person. Your online bromance wasn't doing it," I smirk. They text all the time about basketball and lord knows what else.

"Shut up," Nathan laughs. "I am glad we got to meet, he is a really cool guy, and he watches over you while I am not here," Nathan says.

"Uh huh, what about you? What's going on at Princeton?" I ask him.

"Basketball, school work, and more basketball," I laugh. He is a very busy guy at school.

"So no partying and doing drugs?" I tease. He shakes his head.

"Not during the season unless we are told otherwise by the team captains," Nathan says.

"I am going to miss you sleeping in my bed with me," I say and he smiles.

"Hey it's already February, summer will be here in what 3 months?" He asks and I nod.

"I know, I am excited. I am nannying the Cruz's again," I smile.

"That's exciting," he says as our food gets put down. I smile at my Greek yogurt and fruit. Nathan got me an extra side of toast and eggs. So protective. I dig into my food and Nathan watches me smiling.

"So how is the pre-med track treating you?" I ask him.

"It's hard, but I like it a lot. We are learning so much fascinating stuff. I'm looking into the future a bit and seeing where I want this to take me," he says.

"Yeah, what are you thinking?" I ask him.

"Well at first I went in thinking orthopedics, and I am still thinking that but I am now leaning towards pediatric orthopedics," he says and I feel the biggest smile creep up on my face.

"Really?" I ask. Nathan is so good with kids. He just has a natural touch to him.

"Yes, I was just thinking about how much I enjoy being around kids and I don't know," he shrugs.

"I am so happy you decided to work with kids. I have always told you how good you are with them," I say. He shrugs and I shake my head.

"I am proud of you," I say and he smiles.

"I love you," he says.

We finish up eating and head out. Vancouver has a bunch of cute stores so we start walking around. We go into a cool outdoor type of store. They have the type of T-shirt's Nathan loves so I look at the rack of them.

"I like this one," I say. I hold up a light blue shirt with a mountain logo on the pocket of the shirt.

"I like that, but I also like this one," he holds up a red long sleeve with the logo on the back.

"Okay I'll buy you this one, and you buy that one," I say. The look on his face is priceless.

"Absolutely not. You are not buying me anything," oh Nathan Moore this is payback for all the times you have bought me clothes I didn't need.

"Yeah okay," I say. When he looks away I walk right up to the cashier and check out. Best 35 dollars I have ever spent.

I pass him the bag and he looks in it. He takes a deep breath and looks at the ceiling. "Thank you, Bee," he says. Not what I was expecting. He must have sensed the look of shock on my face.

"Picking our battles," he says and I smile. We had a talk about that a while ago.

"Well I am glad you like it, now what are you getting?" I ask him.

"This one and a hat," he says. He holds up his items and we head over to the cashier. She checks him out and puts the items in the bag I have. We walk out and head into another store.

I look around and grab a couple of things. I try them on and give Nathan a fashion show. He laughs as I twirl around in the clothes I am trying on. "You are so cute," he says and I smile.

I end up buying two pairs of jeans and a jacket from that store. I am on a hunt for a Valentine's Day party dress. We go into a bunch of cute little boutiques until we find one that has some good stuff.

Dress after dress I hate all of them. I have two more left and I put on one. I come out and am shocked to find out I love it. It is a bodycon red dress. The sleeves are off the shoulder.

"Holy shit," Nathan says and comes up behind me.

"Do you like it?" I ask him.

"You look stunning, red looks so good on you," he says and I smile.

"Thank you, sugar," I say and he laughs at my nickname. I end up getting the dress.

After we shop for a bit we head back to school. Nathan and I get in my room and I put the clothes I bought away.

"I should pack my stuff up," he says looking at his boxers and shirts on the floor.

"I'll help you," I say and start picking up and folding his stuff. He just throws it in his suitcase. Such a boy. I help him fold and put away all his stuff.

Finally, we are done and he has to head off to the airport. I am so sad to see him go. But I need to get back to my routine of not waking up every morning and having sex.

"Okay let's get you to the airport," I say. I help carry his carry on backpack downstairs.

When we are standing outside I know it's time to say goodbye. I smile up at him and he wraps both arms tightly around me. "I love you so much," I say and he looks down at me and smiles.

"I love you too, my girl. Be good while I am gone," he says. This is such a hard goodbye because I know I won't see him till April.

"I will text me as soon as you land," I say and he smiles. He hugs me and kisses my head. We kiss before he gets in the car. He waves goodbye to me and heads out. Man, I love that boy.

—-

Today is Valentine's Day and that means it is my first sigma kappa Valentine's day. From what I have heard it is a huge party. Everyone wears red and drinks.

Andrew and I are going together, so I am very excited. His frat and our sorority are together for this party. Maisy and John, a sophomore here, are going together.

This morning, Nathan had flowers delivered to my dorm. We called and FaceTimed and got our daily dose of each other. This was our first valentines without each other.

I look over at Olivia and she looks not good. Last night she went out and came home early saying she didn't feel good. She says she has a migraine and feels nauseous. I go to the bathroom and come back with a cold washcloth for her.

"Thank you," she says and I frown.

"Can I get you any medicine or anything to eat?" I ask her. I feel so bad she looks like she is in a lot of pain. She shakes her head no.

"Would you mind getting ready in Maisy's room? I just don't know if I could deal with the lights being turned on," she says and I nod.

"Of course, I am actually going to head over there now," I say and rub her shoulder. I pack up all my makeup and take my curling iron. I replace the cold washcloth before I head over to Maisy's room.

"Hey bitch, what's up?" She asks as I set my stuff down.

"Not much Olivia is sick, so I am getting ready in here today," I say and she smiles.

"Yay, wanna curl my hair for me," She asks and I knew that one was coming.

"Of course, let me do my makeup first then I will," I say and she thanks me. I sit at her desk as she plays music and does my makeup. I decide to do a red lip because it is Valentine's day.

After I am finished I have Maisy sit down in front of me. I section off her hair and start to curl it. "How is Nathan?" She asks.

"So good, he sent me flowers this morning," I say and she smiles.

"Such a good boyfriend," she says and I nod. He truly is.

I keep curling her hair until I am happy with the results. She, of course, loves it and prances around the room. She puts on her dress and shows me the final look.

"Okay now look," she says. It is so her it makes me smile. She is in a bodycon red sparkly dress and tall red shoes.

"Damn girl," I say. "You look so good," I smile.

"Good enough to have John hook up with me?" She asks.

"If he doesn't he is stupid," I laugh and she smiles.

"Okay you go get dressed the males will be here soon," she says. I leave my stuff and sneak into my room. When I walk in Olivia is on her side holding her head. I feel so bad.

"Liv, can I get you anything?" I ask.

"No, but have so much fun tonight," she says and I smile.

"Call me if you need anything," I say as I slip on my dress. I put on nude lace-up heels and apply a little more lipstick. I remind Olivia to call before I head out.

When I walk out to Maisy's room, John and Andrew are standing there. They both have their red shirts on and it makes me smile. "Dang Grey, you clean up nicely," he says and I smile.

"You do too, are we going straight to the frat?" I ask. They both nod and I grab my body cross bag for my phone.

We walk outside and Nathan loops his elbow in mine. We walk in front of Maisy and John who are laughing behind us. Maisy is doing her signature flirty giggle as she flips her hair behind her back.

"How was having the kid here?" Andrew asks me.

"amazing, it was so good to see him. I can't believe you knew he was coming and didn't tell me," I say and he shakes his head.

"Why would I, it was such a good surprise I would never ruin that for you," he says being sweet as usual.

"I'll get you back for that," I smirk.

"I hope you do," he says and I laugh.

We walk up to the frat and there are red balloons and red solo cups everywhere. Andrew gets us both drinks and we walk around talking to everyone. We talk to Olivia's boy toy named Tj who is the funniest kid ever. He also is pretty cute. Nothing compared to my Nathan.

"How was Liv when you left?" He asks.

"She was feeling pretty bad. She refused to let me get her anything though. Truthfully, I think she wanted me out so she could sleep," I say and he smiles.

"That's Olivia for you," I say and he laughs nodding.

We head over to the dance floor and Andrew and I dance to the remixes of songs all mashed together. The heat and alcohol is making me feel pretty buzzed. Maisy and I dance together to when she comes over.

"Holy shit, this is so fun," Maisy says chugging the rest of her drink and handing the cup to John to refill. She has him in line.

I get another drink and walk over to Caroline. "Hey girl," she says hugging me.

"Hey what's up?" I smile.

"Not much, how is everything?" She asks me.

"Pretty good, how are you?" I ask her.

"Good, how is your family?" I know exactly what she is asking. She never will just come out and ask me how teddy is. I have gotten used to the fact that they do text and talk. I don't know exactly what's going on with it though.

"Pretty good, Teddy has been busy," I say.

"Oh my gosh I know," she says then pauses realizing what she has just said. "I mean… I bet law school is hard," she says. I laugh at her trying to cover up.

"Caroline, I know you guys talk, it's fine," I say.

"You do?" She asks.

"Ted learned his lesson and told me. Just like you should. As long as I am not walking in on you two doing the dirty and aware of what's going on I am fine with you two seeing each other," I say. She smiles and wraps her arms around me.

"Phoebe Grey, I think I love you," she says and I laugh.

"Uh huh, okay I have to go find my date, bye," I say and walk off to find Andrew. I feel my phone buzz and grab it from my bag. I see a text from Olivia.

*I think I need to go to ER. If I am not in the dorm, assume I went there. Don't worry about me, PG!*

Oh lord. I run and find Andrew. "We need to go now," I say. He looks concerned but doesn't question it. I take off my shoes and run out of the frat.

"Olivia says she is going to the ER," I say quickly. He says shit and gets on his phone.

"we need to go to my dorm," I say. He takes my hand and runs with me there. After the quick run, I see Olivia. She is laying on a bench outside our dorm.

"Olivia, what are you doing?" I ask.

"Waiting for my Uber to the hospital, Phoebe I told you not to come," she says. She looks ghostly pale and very sick.

"No, none of that. We are coming," I say. She tries to protest, but Andrew and I get her in the uber successfully. She lays down in the back behind us. I feel so bad.

"Almost there, Olivia," Andrew says. I rub her back and Andrew is texting TJ I assume.

Once we get there it is a whirlwind of explaining to doctors and nurses what is going on and getting her in a room. My phone is buzzing like crazy and I ignore it because I assume it is Maisy.

Olivia is laying down on the exam bed and Andrew and I are sitting waiting for the doctors. Finally, a young woman walks in carrying a clipboard.

"Hi there, I am Nurse Tina and I am here to check you out. I hear you are having a migraine and vomiting," she says and Olivia just nods.

"Okay, I am going to stick this under your tongue and check your temperature," she says and she nods. She takes it in her mouth keeping her eyes closed.

"You have a fever, okay we are going to get you on an IV, you are very dehydrated," she says and Olivia nods.

Olivia winces as the nurse sets up her IV. Olivia is squeamish when it comes to medical stuff. She about fainted when she watched me throw up. my phone keeps going off an insane amount. I ignore it as Olivia grab my hand holding it.

"Liv, we should call your parents," I say.

"No, I am fine. I'll be fine," she says weakly. I look to Andrew and he signals to leave it. Olivia keeps her eyes closed and ends up falling asleep.

Andrew's phone starts to ring and he quickly silences it. He looks to see who it is and holds it up to me. Fuck why is Nathan calling him?

I take the phone and walk outside the room. I know Olivia is good with Andrew in there. "Hello," I say.

"Phoebe? Phoebe, are you okay?" He asks. He sounds panicked.

"Yes, I am fine. Nathan, what is going on?" I ask him.

"I should be asking you that, I get a call from your dad saying Sawyer watched you get in an Uber and it took you to the hospital and before he could grab you, you ran in. Now he is sitting in the lobby and they won't let him back," he says. Oh, my word. Sawyer. I wasn't even thinking.

"I'm so stupid. Olivia is super sick, and when she called saying she was ubering to the hospital alone I ran to her," I say.

"Phoebe, your parents are worried sick. We will talk later you need to call them," he says.

"Okay, I am sorry," I say. Shit, I really screwed up.

"I love you, keep me updated," he says.

"I will, I love you too," I say. We hang up and I immediately take my phone out of my bag. Shit. 8 missed calls from my dad, 3 from Nathan, 2 from Teddy, 4 from Sawyer, and 1 from my mom. Bless her heart. I call my dad back. It takes no more than two rings to get him on the line.

"Phoebe Grace, where are you? What is happening?" He says and I can hear in his voice he is pissed.

"Dad, listen I am so sorry for not calling you or telling Sawyer, but it was an emergency. I was at a party and Olivia called me saying she was taking herself to the hospital. I couldn't let her do that, so I hoped in the car she was going and went to the hospital with her. I am fine, I am not hurt just being here to support Liv," I say. I hear my dad sigh.

He takes the phone away from his ear and is talking. Assuming he is telling the seven bodyguards he has hired in the last 30 seconds that they are free to go. I can imagine him running his hands through his hair.

"Phoebe, I am glad you are there for Olivia. You can't just run away though. We were worried sick about you. We didn't know what was going on with you. Please remember we need to be in the loop," he says sighing.

"I am sorry, Dad. I will I promise. I love you so much," I say.

"I love you most, Bubs," he says. It feels so good to hear that. After we hang up I head back into the room. Olivia got a shot from the nurse that is supposed to help her feel better. For now, Andrew and I are sitting in two wooden chairs leaning on each other.

After a couple of hours, she starts to feel better. The doctors said she was severely dehydrated which causes migraines and nausea. They said it was good she came here because she was about to be really sick.

They discharge her around 4 in the morning. Sawyer drives us home and the whole way I get to hear about how mad he is at me. I apologize then just let him go on his tangent.

I kiss Sawyer's cheek before heading inside with Olivia and tucking her in. She will be out for the count for a while now and I am thinking I may just join her.

—

This weekend is mom's weekend. I am so excited, it is going to be so much fun. We rented out a club for it, so it'll be crazy. My mom gets here in an hour. I have been at the sorority house all morning prepping our moms day stuff.

I made my mom a cute picture frame, so when we get our picture taken she can put it in it. I also helped paint the mom's day banner. I am covered in paint and glue. I head back to my dorm to shower.

"Yikes," Olivia says as I come in and grab my towel and robe.

"Shut up," I laugh. I head into the bathroom and scrub myself clean. I have glue and paint all over. I wash my hair and my body and then get out.

I dry and curl my hair and start my makeup. My mom is coming soon, so I have to hurry. I do some pretty natural makeup and call it a day. For right now, I put on a WSU shirt and jeans.

I get a text from my mom that she is almost here, I head downstairs and wait by the door. It is chilly out here right now. Soon I see an Audi pull up and I run out. She gets out of the car looking perfectly polished as usual.

"Phoebe girl," she says hugging me. I smile and hug her back tightly. I have missed her.

"How are you?" She asks me as she checks over me.

"I am great, super excited for this weekend," I say.

"Oh me too, I am excited to have you all to myself. I never get that," she says and I smile.

"I know, it will be so fun. Let's put your stuff in the hotel and then we can get lunch. Where do you want to go?" I ask her.

"Hmm, what's your favorite place here?" She asks.

"The Soup Spoon, it has every type of soup you could ever want," I say and she smiles.

"Soupspoon it is then," she smiles. We walk out together. We head to the hotel and she puts her stuff in her room quickly. After she walks out and we head over to soup spoon.

"This place is so cute," she smiles looking around.

"I know, I took Nathan here and he wanted to come back every day he was here," I say smiling.

"How is Nathan?" She asks as we get seated.

"He is great, Princeton's team is doing great they have only lost once," I say and she smiles.

"You said he is interested in peds now?" She asks and I look up from my menu.

"Yes, he is," I say.

"Wow, that's a difficult major," she says.

"How so?" I ask.

"You'll have to see kids in pain. I could never do it," she says.

"But you're helping them," I say. She shakes her head.

"After you have kids of your own it's different. Seeing you guys hurt, hurt me," she says and I nod. "I applaud him for being able to do that," she says and I nod.

We order our food and my mom holds up her phone taking a picture of me. I laugh and shake my head. "What your dad asked for one," she says. I shake my head laughing.

"You are such a Mom," I say.

"Thank you, I take that as a compliment," she says making me laugh.

"How is everything at home," I ask her.

"It's good, we had dinner with the Team's last night," she says talking about our family friends.

"Oh cool, how were they?" I ask her.

"Good, their daughter, Ally, is graduating from Duke next year," she says and I nod.

"Impressive," I say.

"How has school been? How is Olivia?" She asks.

"A lot better. Olivia gets ocular migraines and so when she had a regular migraine she didn't think anything of it and went to class and so she was super dehydrated," I say and she shakes her head.

"Sounds like something you would do," she teases me.

"I am pretty injury prone," I shrug and she nods.

"You got that from me, we are both accident and injury prone," she says and I smile.

"You never show it though," I say and she laughs.

"Oh my gosh, are you kidding? Did I ever tell you the story about our first trip away from Teddy?" She asks. I shake my head no as our food gets delivered. We both thank the waiter and dig in.

"Teddy was seven months old. It was our first time being away from him for longer than a night. Elliot had just redone the cabin in Ellensburg for the first time, and they offered to let us stay while they watched Ted. So we go and everything is great. We decide to take a hike. I am in front of your dad on a downward hill and all of a sudden I miss a step and am sliding down the hill feet first. I ended up fracturing my wrist and we had to go to the ER," she says and I am dying laughing.

"That's horrible Dad was probably freaking out," I say and she nods laughing.

"Oh yeah, big time. When the nurses took me to get an X-ray and they told him he couldn't come it was about to be world war three," she says and I laugh at that.

"Sounds like Dad," I say.

"Exactly like him, how is your soup?" She asks. I got the broccoli cheddar soup and she got French onion. We both got side salads.

"Amazing, how is yours?" I ask.

"So good try some," she says and I take a bite. It is so good.

"So who am I meeting this weekend?" She asks.

"Maisy, Regan, Caroline, Kendra, Lyla, and Olivia are the big ones," I say.

"Which one started the drama with a Teddy?" She asks and I smile.

"My big, Caroline, I think they are talking," I say and my mom raises her eyebrows.

"Wow, are you okay with that?" She asks.

"I am because they told me and I know not to walk in on them anymore," I say making her smile.

"Oh sweet girl," she says smiling.

"Anyway, do you want to head out? We can go walk around campus for a bit," I suggest.

"That sounds amazing, let's do it," my mom smiles.

She takes me to her and Kate's apartment together. "This is where I lived when I met you, dad," she says and I smile.

"That's so funny, I bet dad had a heart attack when he saw this compared to Escala," I say.

"No, but when he saw my car that him in," she says and I laugh.

"Wanda?" I say and she laughs.

"Yes, Wanda. She was a great car," my mom says.

My mom walks around the campus showing me all her favorite spots. Some are gone and replaced, but most of the stuff is still here. She is the funniest tour guide.

We head back to my mom's hotel and I agree that after I get ready I will come back here. I just have to go to my dorm and shower. I also have to pick an outfit, do my hair, and makeup.

I head home and hop in the shower quickly. I dry my hair but decide I want my mom to curl it. I love it when she does it. I do my makeup like I normally do it and throw on a little lip gloss. Now picking something to wear is going to be hard.

We have to be conservative enough to not offend any moms, but still, dress up. I decide on my black and white striped pants. I put on a black crop top so only a little bit on my stomach is showing and my black shoes.

When I am finally happy with my out, I head towards the hotel. When I walk in I go up to the top floor and head into her room. She is sitting in her robe doing her hair. "You look so pretty," she says.

"Thank you, will you do my hair," I ask and she nods. She finishes up hers first and then I sit down in front of her and she starts mine.

"What do you think I should wear?" She asks.

"What did you bring?" I ask her.

"A little bit of everything, my dear," she says and I smile.

"What are we doing tonight?" She asks.

"We rented out a club and there's going to be a photo booth cause we all made you guys these little gifts," I say and she smiles.

"I'm so excited to meet some moms," she says and I smile. She is so cute.

"How are your classes?" She asks.

"They are good, kind of stressful right now. It's nothing I can't handle though," I say and she nods.

"Don't be afraid to ask for help," she says being such a mom.

"I know, I will and I do," I say and she smiles.

"Well Okay you are done, now come help me pick an outfit," she says and I smile.

We go in her closet and end up picking out a red Prada sweater and her new jeans. She looks absolutely adorable.

"I love that sweater," I say.

"Your dad picked this out. He said red is my color," she shrugs. My dad would say every color is her color. He worships the ground she walks on.

"Okay I am ready," she says smiling.

"Let's go then," I say. We head out and start towards the sorority house. It is a quick drive and we are there. When we walk out I see Maisy and her mom.

"Maisy," I call out for her. She sees me and smiles running towards me.

"PG, what the hell you never said your mom was your clone," she says making my mom and I both laugh.

"Hi nice to meet you, I am Maisy," she says and gives my mom a hug.

"Hi I am Ana, Phoebe's mom," she says smiling.

"This is my mom, Janice," she says. She introduces her mom who looks nothing like her.

"I know it doesn't look like it, she is all her dad," Maisy's mom laughs.

"Nice to meet you," I say as we greet each other.

"So what do you girls have planned for us?" She asks.

"Lots of fun stuff and beverages," Maisy says. Her mom shakes her head laughing.

"I hope you mean water," my mom says making us laugh.

We walk in the club and they have oldies playing for all the moms. We get drinks, my mom and I get white claws. I think back to the first time I drank these which was on Nathan's friend's boat in Florida.

Our president tells us all get in line for the photo booth. We did picture frames for all of the moms and we are giving them a picture to go with it. My mom and I are up and we get a couple of pictures.

After I give her the frame and the picture. "Phoebe girl, this is so cute," she says.

"I'm glad you think so, it wasn't my best work," I shrug and she smiles.

"I love your paintings and art. The painting that you gave me is still my favorite," she says and I smile.

"That makes me so happy, well let's go talk to the moms," I say and she nods.

I see Caroline and her mom. We walk up to them and Caroline runs and gives me a huge hug. "Grey," she says. She turns to my mom then to me.

"Wow, you two look so much alike. Hi, Mrs. Grey, I am Caroline," she says and shakes my mom's hand.

"Hi Caroline, I am Ana Grey," she says smiling.

"Hi, Mrs. Grey. It's nice to meet you, this is my mom Amy," she says. I have never seen Caroline be so polite and put together. Is she trying to impress my mom?

"Is Phoebe your only child?" Amy asks. Oh no not a good question, Amy.

"No, I have a son who is a year above Caroline. He goes to Harvard," My mom says and Caroline's mom raises her eyebrows. I can see Caroline wanting to crawl into a hole.

"Harvard, that is amazing," she says and we smile.

"So Caroline what's your major?" My mom asks averting the conversation away from Teddy Grey.

"Business," she says and my mom nods her head.

"That's what my husband works in, mergers and acquisitions," she says and Caroline nods smiling.

"I know, we study a lot of your husband's deals here at school," she says and my mom smiles.

"Doesn't surprise me. He is a very hard worker," she says smiling at the thought of my dad.

"Well we need more drinks, we will see you guys around tonight," Caroline says and hugs my mother and me before walking away.

The rest of the night is spent talking and socializing. It is so much fun to have my mom here. She keeps staring at someone and I can't help but look too. I think that is Caitlyn's mom.

"Do you know her?" I ask.

"No," my mom says quickly. That means she 100% does know them.

"Oh, then why are you staring?" I ask.

"Because I- she just looks familiar," my mom says. There is something going on here.

As we talk to Lyla and her mom the lady starts walking over towards us. "Anastasia Steele?" The woman asks. I knew they knew each other.

"Susan, What are you doing here?" That's a weird question, Mom. She is acting so weird.

"My daughter Caitlyn goes here and is a sigma kappa," she says and my mom nods. What the hell is happening?

"Oh that's great, you got married?" My mom asks and she nods.

"A man named Jim, he is great and is so kind to me. No being an asshole or controlling," she says and my mom's face goes whiter.

"Well I am happy for you," my mom says sarcastically. Yikes. What is happening?

"Give Mr. Grey my best," she says. Why did she call my mom Anastasia and my dad Mr. Grey?

"What was all that?" I ask.

"I don't know," she says and I can tell she is lying. Who was that Susan girl? She had similar features to my mom. Dark brown hair and blue eyes. What is going on?

"You obviously knew her, she knew your name and called Dad Mr. Grey," I say. She sighs and looks to me.

"Your father had a relationship with her before he met me," she says and I am shocked. What are the odds that they meet here?

"Jeez, then how do you know her?" I ask. If their relationship was before why would my mom know of her?

"Not here, Phoebe," she says and looks around. I nod and accept that. I get it I wouldn't want to talk about my past either.

"Hey well, why don't we go dance," I say and she smiles.

The rest of the night is spent jamming out to all of our mom's favorite oldies. My mom meets a ton of other moms as she wanted to. I love having her here with me. It almost makes me miss living at home.

At around one in the morning, we head back to the hotel. My mom convinces me to just stay with her for the night. She gives me her extra set of pjs and we lay in the big bed.

"Mom?" I ask.

"Mhmm," She says.

"How did you know that lady?" I ask her. She sighs and turns to me.

"You my child," she says.

"What I'm curious," I say.

"Curiosity killed the cat," she says and I shake my head.

"Fine, after your dad and I got married she came to my office and asked for a meeting. I let her in because I didn't know what she wanted. She ended up trying to tell me bad things about your father," she says.

"What did you do?" I ask.

"Politely asked her to leave," she says and I smile. So my mom.

"Thanks for telling me," I say and she smiles.

"I love you, now go to bed," she says making me smile. I love this woman.

—

"Okay, you're sure it's okay we go?" Olivia asks me for the fifth time. Spring break is next week and she is freaking out about my dad paying for us to go to California.

"Olivia, don't worry about it. It was my birthday present you are fine," I say and she nods.

"I mean, I just can't believe that he did that. I haven't even met him," she says.

"You will when we have dad's weekend," I say.

"Well I need to get ready for spring break," she says.

"What do you have to do besides pack?" I ask.

"Packing takes me forever and a day. And I have to go get some stuff from the drug store. I don't even know what I want to pack. I am so excited," she says and I smile.

"Well I have to get to class, you should make a packing list," I say and she nods.

"You're brilliant, have fun in class," she says and I smile.

I walk outside heading to class. It is a little bit chilly, so I have my big coat on. When I get to class I sit at my usual table. I wait for Lyla and Charley. They are my psych friends.

When they sit down we chit chat before the professor starts her lecture on bystanders. It is quite fascinating. I take diligent notes while Lyla types on her computer and Charley draws. She always takes pictures of my notes anyway.

The lecture goes on for two hours. I write down all the things I need to study before our exam this week. We have exams before we leave on spring break. I don't think mine will be too bad I just have to make sure I study.

After class, I head to the library to study. As I sit down and sip the coffee I bought myself I hear my phone ring. I pull out my phone and see Nathan calling me.

"Hey Nate," I say as I answer. I am cradling the phone between my head and shoulder as I write.

"Hey Bee, you have a minute?" He asks.

"Always for you, what's up?" I ask.

"You are going to be in California next week right?" He asks.

"Yeah, why?" I ask.

"Well, we have a game at USC next weekend so I will be there from Thursday to Saturday," he says. What? Is he kidding?

"Are you screwing with me?" I ask.

"Why would I screw with you about that? You don't have to come to the game, but I would love to get to take you to lunch or something. I don't want to barge in on your spring break," he says and I smile.

"Are you kidding? I'm buying tickets now, the girls will be so excited to get to go to USC, Regan almost went there," I say.

"Are you sure, I don't want to interfere," he says and I roll my eyes.

"Shut up, we are coming, I am so excited. You and some guys will have to come over and hang out with us," I say and he laughs.

"I'm sure your friends would love that," he teases.

"I know I would," I smirk.

"Uh huh. Watch it, Grey," he says.

"Well, now I am so excited for spring break. I have to go tell the girls they will be so excited," I say and he laughs.

"Okay, I love you," he says.

"Love you too," we bid each other goodbye and I finish up studying. After I am done, I go back to my room and call the girls in.

"What's up?" Maisy asks.

"Well, Nathan called me today and said they are playing at USC next week," I say and they smile.

"Does that mean we get tickets?" Maisy asks and I nod.

"And if you guys were okay with it maybe one day after the game they could come and hang with us," I say.

"The Princeton basketball team in swimsuits with us? Oh count me in," Olivia says.

"Olivia aren't you and TJ dating?" Regan laughs.

"Hey gawking isn't cheating," she says and I laugh.

"Sure, you can gawk all you want. But really is everyone okay with that?" I ask.

"Phoebe it is your beach house, even if we weren't all absolutely stoked it wouldn't matter," Liv says and they both nod.

"I love you guys. I am so fucking excited," I smile.

"PG thank you for picking us to come to your house, this is going to be so crazy," Olivia says and I smile.

"I know, ahhhh and this is my first time on a private jet," Regan says and we all laugh.

"What do you do on a private jet? Can I stand up and scream and dance?" She asks making me laugh.

"If that's your cup of tea sure," I say and she smiles hugging me.

"I can't wait to be in warm weather," Maisy says.

"And get drunk with warm weather," Liv adds making us all laugh.

"Oh hell yeah, ladies get ready for the week of your life," Maisy says and we all smile.

_**March **_

We leave for California today. Meaning I get to see Nathan in 3 days. Meaning I am done with exams for another 2 months. I am so excited. I can't even contain it.

We are on our way to the private airport right now. It is seven am and we all have coffees and are in sweats. When we get there we board the plane and sit down. I am next to Olivia and across from Regan and Maisy.

"Take off will be in 10 minutes, if you need anything my name is Katie please do not be afraid to ask," the flight attendant says. We thank her and snuggle into our seats.

"I can't believe this is how you traveled all throughout your life," Maisy says.

"It was the only thing I knew," I shrug and she nods looking around.

"Is that a bedroom back there?" Regan asks.

"Yep," I nod.

"Didn't you take your cousin and Nathan to California once?" Olivia asks.

"Yeah when we were seniors," I say.

"Oh my god," Maisy says.

"What?" I ask.

"You are totally a member of the mile high club," my face turns bright red giving me away.

"What?" I feign innocence.

"You and Nathan have totally fucked in there," Liv says.

"Maybe," I say and they all start dying laughing.

"Grey, who thought you had it in you?" Regan says making me blush.

"Was it good?" Maisy asks.

"It's always good," I say and they all start oohing and laughing.

"Don't make me jealous, Grey," Maisy says.

"What was Mike, Nick, Joe, or John not good enough for you?" Regan teases her.

"Joe and Mike were excellent if you must know," she says and I laugh.

We take off and I put on my headphones to watch a movie. Regan does class work and Maisy and Liv sleep. I end up falling asleep for the majority of my movie and the plane ride.

I get slapped on the arm by a twizzler and I don't even have to open my eyes to know who did it. "Maisy piss off," I say and I hear her laugh.

"Come on, Grey. We are landing soon," she says and passes me a bottle of water from her bag. I take it thankfully and take a large sip. Holy fuck.

"Maisy, what the fuck?" I say and she laughs.

"Come on, Grey," she says.

"What happened to a warning," I ask. Her bottle of water is full of vodka. I pour a little in my cranberry juice I was drinking and put it in my bag.

"There is a lot more where that came from," Maisy says. Liv and Regan have their own water bottles too.

When we get off the plane we are all buzzed. We get in Sawyer's car and he looks back at us. "What's up?" I ask.

"You all wreak of alcohol," he says and shakes his head.

"Sorry Sawyer, you want some?" Olivia asks.

"I'll kick you out of the car, Johnson," Sawyer teases and we all start laughing.

The ride to the house is quick and painless. We all get our own rooms. The girls are shocked and will not stop thanking me. "Phoebe, it is so nice here," Liv says.

"Thank you guys for coming, now let's all get our swimsuits and Maisy approved water bottles and head to the pool," I say and they start laughing.

I put on my pinstriped bikini with the cut outs and grab my sun hat. I put on sunscreen and grab my water bottle heading downstairs. I grab the lounge chair next to Liv and sit down.

"I love that suit," she says and I thank her.

"Gosh Grey, this is amazing," she says.

"I know I am so glad you guys are here," I say.

I drink a little bit of my drink and lounge in the sun. This is life, it is so great not having to worry about anything or anyone. I yawn and put down my sunglasses.

"Party's here," I hear Maisy's voice and Regan's laugh.

"We wanna go to the beach, are you guys coming?" Regan asks.

"Eh I'll stay here and come down later," Liv says and I nod my head agreeing with her.

I am so exhausted from flying so I start to nod off. I end up falling asleep in the sun. Luckily, I have Liv who continuously sprays me with sunscreen so I don't burn in my sleep. I dry asleep for about an hour.

When I wake up I feel hot and crispy, but very good. I jump in the pool and get out. "Thanks for making sure I didn't burn," I say to Liv and she smiles.

"You are the only person I know who would sleep in the sun like that," she says.

"Shit, Phoebe you are so tan already," Maisy says as they come up from the beach.

"Oh thank you," I say and smile.

"Let's swim for a while and then head up to shower and get ready for dinner," I say.

"Sounds perfect," Liv says and they nod.

We swim for a couple more hours until heading upstairs. I hop in the shower and realize how much color I actually did get. My tan lines are sharp and I am loving being this color.

I curl my hair in long waves and put on makeup. I put on my matching two-piece set. It is a cropped tube top and a skirt. I love this outfit. I put on nude wedges and head downstairs.

"Damn," I hear Regan say.

"Oh my gosh, Pg. I am borrowing that one night," Maisy says.

"You guys are too sweet," I laugh. We take lots of pictures to post and send to our parents.

We go to dinner at a restaurant near our house. It is an Italian place and has the best pasta in the world. The conversation ranges from boys to school to partying.

We go to Nathan and my favorite ice cream place after dinner. I get mint chocolate chip in honor of Nathan and send him a picture. We sit on the patio eating our ice cream and enjoying the warm weather.

"This week is going to be perfect I can already tell," Maisy says and we smile.

"Oh I know," Regan says.

"Let's head back and do a bonfire on the beach," Olivia says. Must be her Florida roots itching to get on the beach.

"Sounds good," I smile.

We head back to the house and do just that having a bonfire together. The next 3 days are spent just like the first one. Relaxing and being with my girls.

—-

Tonight is the game at USC. We all have our Princeton gear on. I had to lend all 3 of them shirts, but thankfully I steal a lot of Nathan's clothes. Maisy is braiding my hair right now to the side.

We are getting ready and jamming to the playlist we created for this trip. I am doing my makeup while Mase does my hair. She is so good at braiding she makes it look so cute.

"Okay you are done," she says and my hair is braided to the side. I will never understand how she does it. It is like perfectly messy and styled.

"You are a miracle worker," I smile.

We all finish getting ready and get lots of pics. I am practically bouncing on the edge of my seat as we drive there. I am so excited to see my boy. I haven't seen him since my birthday.

We arrive in the arena and I pass the girls their tickets. We scan in and go through security one by one. We get sodas and sit down at our seats. They are very close to courtside.

There is a bunch of fun music and interactive games before the teams run out on the court. I spot him very quickly. If it's possible he looks even better than usual. He looks even more muscular.

"Dang Grey, I call dibs if you two ever end it," Maisy says and I start laughing.

"I'll remember that," I say and she smiles.

The game starts and the boys are doing pretty well. USC scores, but the boy's defense is looking very good. We cheer and yell for Princeton. I think all the people around us would love to kill us.

Nathan gets a free throw and makes it. I jump up clapping and going crazy for him. I'm such a proud girlfriend. The girls are loving their lives getting to watch these boys.

Princeton is up and we are winning when we go into half time. Maisy and I tackle the bathroom line before heading back to our seats. Regan and Liv are taking pictures.

I sit and think of how good it is to be able to be here. It is so good to watch him play. I miss being able to go to all his games like I did when we were in high school. This is only my second game.

We are in our seats and the game starts back up. It is a shorter half and the Princeton boys are doing amazing. They end up winning the game after Nathan makes a shot. Everyone stands up screaming and cheering.

After the game, the girls and I go and wait where Nathan said to meet him. It doesn't take long before he walks out and I run to him. He smiles his biggest smile when he sees me. I jump in his arms and we hug.

"Hi Bee," he says and those are the two most comforting words.

"I'm so proud of you," I say and he laughs.

"I'm sweaty," he says as we hug.

"I don't care," I say.

"Hey Nathan," I hear Olivia say. We walk up to them and Nathan greets each of them.

"Are you coming back to our place?" I ask him.

"Technically, I am supposed to be at the hotel. Tomorrow is when we can go roam around wherever. I would love to have you come to the hotel, but I don't think you want to room with Zach," he says and I smirk.

"Okay, well what time are you coming over tomorrow?" I ask him.

"I'll come over right when I wake up, but the guys will come over around noon. There is 3 of them is that okay?" He asks and I nod smiling.

"Okay, the bus is leaving so I have to go, but I love you and will see you so soon," he says and kisses me. He says goodbye to the girls and heads off.

"He is so dreamy," Maisy says and I laugh.

"Shut up, let's get home so I can sleep and wake up to Nathan," I say.

"Where? Between your legs?" Maisy says and I cover my face as they laugh.

"You're disgusting," I laugh. We head home and as promised I get to bed. It doesn't take me long to fall asleep.

I wake up around 10 to feel a lump next to me. I push it away thinking it is one of the stupid decor pillows that we have on the beds. It turns out to be way more solid and warm than a pillow.

"That's no way to greet your boyfriend," I hear his voice and smile. I open my eyes and rub them

seeing Nathan's smiling face.

"Hi," I smile. He laughs and leans down kissing me.

"Hi yourself," he says and I giggle. This boy makes my heart so happy.

"I missed you," I say as I prop myself up more. I am in his T-shirt and panties.

"Do you ever wear your own clothes?" He asks examining my outfit. I shake my head laughing. His hand creeps up my thigh and rests on it.

"You're killing me," I say and he smiles leaning down kissing me.

The kiss turns passionate and he lifts me up so I am straddling him. I run my hands through his hair as we make out. I grind my butt against him and I can feel him getting harder beneath me.

"You little minx," he says and I laugh. He pulls off my shirt leaving me in just my panties. His eyes wander over my body and I begin to feel self-conscious.

"Stop that," he says. "You are so beautiful," he says before going in and kissing my neck. How does he do that?

I unbuckle his pants and pull down his boxers. I wrap my hand around him and start stroking him. He breathes against my neck and his lips find my boobs.

"Oh my fuck," he says. I smile and go faster teasing the tip with my thumb.

"I need you," he says. He lifts my hips up and rips my panties off. Well, I guess I didn't need those anyway. His fingers dip inside of me without warning and I jump a bit.

"You are so wet for me," he says and I blush. He keeps fingering me until he replaces his fingers with his dick. I start riding him as I am on top.

My hands are on his chest and I am bouncing up and down. I do long strokes on him and it feels so deep. I grip his shoulders tightly as I bounce on him.

Nathan's hands go from my boobs to that little ball of pleasure. I moan as he rubs me. It makes me arch my back a bit. Sweat drips down from me as I ride it out.

"You are so close," he moans and I call out yes. How does he always know before I finish? I really should ask him that one day.

"Ahh, Nathan I'm-" my words get cut off by my orgasm as I ride it out on him. It is so intense and so good. He comes right along with me. I fall forward onto him with my face in the crook on his neck. His hands find my naked back rubbing it.

"Damn Bee," he says and I smile.

We both clean up and decide we are hungry heading downstairs. Nathan's friends should be here soon. We make breakfast and sit enjoying each other's company before the storm that is my friends come downstairs.

We sit on the patio eating cereal. Nathan wanted to make me something better, but I was craving Honey Nut Cheerios and bananas. I am sitting Indian style on the patio furniture listening to the sound of the ocean and Nathan talk about school.

The girls come outside in their swimsuits. They see us and all come over. "Hey, we totally thought you guys were fucking so we didn't come get you," Maisy says. Well, at least she is honest.

"Nope just eating cereal, the guys are coming at noon, so you all can relax until then," I say.

"Nate, are anyone of them hot?" Olivia asks.

"Don't you have a boyfriend?" Nathan asks.

"Gosh, you sound like Phoebe," she says making us laugh.

Nathan and I go inside to change into swimsuits. I put on my cute colorful striped bikini. It makes me look very tan. I braid my hair to the back and grab two of Maisy's "water" bottles. Nathan puts on his army green swim trunks and looks good enough to eat.

"You ready?" I ask him. He looks me up and done and smirks.

"As I'll ever be, you look so good, baby," he says.

"Mmm thank you, are you going to stay here tonight?" I ask with big doe eyes.

"We'll see what I can do, is this for me?" He asks pointing to the water bottle.

"Yeah, but it is vodka," I smirk and pass it to him.

"Jesus, it's almost noon let's head down," he says. We go to the pool deck and lay on the big outdoor daybed we have and tan. The girls are all on pool rafts floating.

All of a sudden we hear laughing and whooping. Must be Nathan's friends. I stand up and go with him to open the back gate. Three huge guys walk in. They are all Nathan's height making me feel tiny.

"Phoebe, this is Zach, Jake, and Cooper," he says.

"Hi guys, I am Phoebe Grey," I say greeting all of them. They are all pretty attractive. Nothing compared to Nathan, but still, they are lookers. The girls come over and I can see they like what is here.

"Guys this is Regan, Maisy, and Olivia. Girls, this is Zach, Jake, and Cooper," I say introducing them. They all mingle and come inside. They brought alcohol here for them. We turn on some music.

I have a vodka lemonade and am sitting with Nathan's arm around me on the side of the pool. We are all learning about each other. Zach and Cooper are both business and marketing majors like Olivia. Jake is a political science major.

They tell stories about going out with the basketball guys. Some Nathan hasn't even told me. I can tell Maisy and Cooper are hitting it off. Regan has stuck close to Jake and Liv and Zach are talking.

I get buzzed and when I jump in the pool Nathan insists on being right next to me. The guys are so fun and play basketball against us. It is so funny because we can barely make a shot and this is kid stuff to them. But to be fair we are a little tipsy.

By the time the boys have to head back, we have done all sorts of stuff. We went jet skiing and played beach volleyball. It was so fun having them here. When I look over I see cooper and Maisy exchanging numbers. That girl.

Nathan stays here instead of heading home and that makes me one happy girl. "Thank you for staying," I say.

"Where else would I be?" He asks and I smile. We lay on my bed talking and he rubs small circles on my back.

"You'll have to come visit soon," he says and I nod.

"I know, tell me when and I am there," I say.

"Hmm well in April there is Princeton founders day. It is like the biggest party of the year. Everyone is drinking and partying all day and night. I would love for you to come to that," He says and I smile.

"I'll book my flight tomorrow," I say and he smiles leaning down to kiss me.

"You are so perfect. How did I ever get so lucky?" He asks. I can ask myself the same thing, Nathan Moore.

—

We are back home from spring break. It was so nice to have Nathan with me for two days. Even a short amount of time with him just makes me feel so much better. But now that I am back things are in full swing.

I am waiting at the hotel for my dad to arrive for dad's day. We rented out a Top Golf floor for the dads. Top golf is a place where you can play golf and it keeps track of your scores automatically. It is on a rooftop so you shoot down onto a lit up course. It is so much fun.

I get a coffee and sit at a table on my laptop doing my homework. I look up to see my dad walking towards me and I run towards him giving him a huge hug.

"Bubs, you look great," he says making me smile.

"You do too. How was the drive?" I ask as we head upstairs to his room.

"Not bad at all, how are you?" He asks.

"I'm great, spring break was so fun. Thank you again for letting us go," I say.

"Of course. I heard You saw Nathan," he says. I nod smiling.

"We got to go to his game at USC it was super fun and the day after he came over with some of his friends," I say and he smiles.

"I'm glad you had fun, Bubs. It looked super fun by the pictures you were sending," he says. We walk into his suite and I sit down on the couch.

"It was so much fun. How is mom?" I ask him.

"She is great, working on two books right now with Rose Cruz. She came by with the kids the other day. Spencer and I got to hang out," he says and I laugh.

"I was working in my office and heard the door open and when I looked up I saw her standing there with her blanket," he says and I laugh.

"Sounds exactly like Spence," I say.

"When she saw the picture of you on my desk she asked if I could put a picture of her on my desk too," he says and that sets me off laughing.

"She is so funny, I love that girl to bits. How were the boys?" I ask.

"Drew is so cute. He has everyone wrapped around his chunky finger. The older boys are great and rambunctious," he says. Sounds exactly like when I left.

"So cute. You must be hungry, we can go get some food if you would like. I made us a reservation for tonight in about 15 minutes at the top of the hotel," I say.

"You are so smart, my dear. I am starving, let me change then we can go," he says. He is still in his suit I assume he worked before he drove down.

When he comes out he is in his casual attire and we head out. We go to the top floor and get seated at a table near a window overlooking Vancouver. I love this restaurant at the hotel.

"Tell me about everything, I haven't seen you since your birthday," he says as I look at my menu.

"I mean since you left, we had mom's day. That was fun and eventful. Then we had date parties and lots of sorority stuff. I passed all my exams before spring break. I don't know what else do you want to know?" I ask.

"Mom said she had fun on mom's day. Have you started planning for next year at all?" He asks.

"Yes, now that I did my mandatory year in a dorm I think Maisy, Olivia, and I are going to get an apartment," I say.

"You want an apartment?" He says as he looks over his menu.

"I mean if it's okay with you," I say realizing he'll be finding this apartment.

"I didn't mean it like that, I am happy to do whatever your heart desires. As long as you are working hard at school and being safe," he says and I nod.

"Yeah it would be nice because the three of us could have our own rooms and we are all best friends so it would be fun," I say and he smiles.

"Just the three of you?" He asks.

"Yeah Regan is moving into a house with some people from her major," I say and he nods.

"What is her major?" He asks.

"Photojournalism," I say and he raises his eyebrows. The waitress comes over and asks if we are ready. I nod and get the pesto pasta with chicken. My dad gets the salmon.

"I actually did have something I wanted to talk to you about now that we are discussing majors," he says and I over at him as the waitress takes my menu.

"The department chair of the business school here reached out to me," he says.

"About what?" I ask.

"They asked me if I would be interested in opening up an internship program with the university. It would be very exclusive only one or two kids would be taken every year. But the goal would be to let kids see what is it like to work at a prestigious company," he says and I nod.

"That sounds pretty cool, are you going to do it?" I ask.

"Well, that is what I wanted to ask you. Are you comfortable with me embarking on a project like that?" He asks. I am shocked that he is asking me. Actually no shocked doesn't even cover it.

"What?" I ask him. He senses my confusion.

"I know I don't usually ask you before I do things that are work-related, but I don't want to overstep my welcome here. I would be coming up at least once every month or two to work with the school on the program. Then when it is announced next year I will be coming to make a speech in September," he says and I nod.

That is so nice of him to ask me before he just does something. I would love for him to do this and I think it would be a cool opportunity for business school kids. Of course, I want him to do it.

"I think that is a super cool idea. I am totally on board if you guys end up doing that," I say and he smiles.

"Your support means the world, Phoebe Grace," he says and I smile.

"I have friends in the business school, I bet they will think it's amazing. They already worship the ground you walk on," I say and he laughs.

We get our food and eat talking more about the program. It sounds like an awesome idea the more I hear about it. My dad works so hard for everything he does.

After dinner, my dad drives me to my dorm. We are meeting at 10 to get breakfast before the Top Golf excursion. I am so excited to golf with my dad and my friends. It'll be so funny.

"Sleep tight, Bubs. I love you," he says as we hug.

"I love you too," I say and he heads out. I wash my face and go to bed. Olivia should be back later. She went out with TJ tonight.

When I wake up in the morning Olivia has the trash can by her bed. Rough night I am guessing. I laugh and shake my head. I put on my dad's day shirt and a pair of jeans. I grab my dad's shirt. I can't wait to tell him he has to wear this. He is going to be less than thrilled.

I head out to the hotel. Sawyer takes me and it is a short car ride. When I walk in I go up to the top floor and head to his suite. I knock on the door and within seconds I open it to him. He is in jeans and a T-shirt. He is showered and his hair is still wet.

"Bubs, you look so cute," he says giving me a hug. I walk in the suite and see a breakfast buffet. Oh, dad.

"Did you eat?" He asks.

"I grabbed a granola bar, but I think I'll have some pancakes instead," I laugh holding up my cliff bar.

We sit down and open the patio doors. "It is getting nicer out," I say.

"It has been pretty nice. Closer we get to April the better," he says and I smile.

"What day do you get home for summer?" He asks.

"May 5th which is super early," I say and he smiles.

"We get you for May, June, July, and part of August?" He asks and I nod. He looks as if he won the lottery.

"That is so exciting," he says and I smile.

"Okay, well I have to break the news. You have to wear this shirt today," I say and pass him his shirt. I am not a huge fan of the matching shirts, but apparently, it's tradition and who am I to stop it.

"Oh," he says and picks up the shirt unfolding it. "This is a nice shirt. I wear this today?" He asks and I laugh. He is such a bad liar.

"Yeah, well get a group picture in it and you and I can get one," I say and he smiles.

"Well, okay. Let me go change and you finish your pancakes," he says and kisses my head. I do as he says to compromise for the shirt.

"Okay ready," he says. He comes out in his jeans and shirt. I can't believe I am 19 wearing a matching shirt with my dad.

We head out to top golf. When we get there we walk in and get our picture taken. We head over to the table with Lyla and Amy two girls from the sorority.

"Grey," Amy comes around and hugs me. She is a junior.

"You never told me your dad was sexy," she says and I about choke.

"Okay you two are at 8, with Maisy, Natalie, and Jess," she says. I love all 3 of those girls.

We head over to where the 8th section and there is a couch, a cooler full of beers, and putters for us. They did such a good job with this. I wasn't involved in really anything I did mom's day.

I sit with Maisy and Natalie as the dad's all talk. I start and type all of our names in the system. I am first and take my club. I go up to the thing I have no clue what it is called and swing. My ball goes straight out and stops not going in a hole. Golf isn't my thing.

All the dad's are drinking beers and talking. It is weird seeing my dad this relaxed and chill. When he is up he, of course, gets his in the farthest hole. The dad's drink and we all play golf.

I can see my dad and Maisy's talking. We go over and talk to them. "Yeah, Phoebe kept us on her toes as a kid," he says and I laugh. Maisy laughs too.

"Maisy… well, she was just Maisy. You could always expect something to be going on with this child," Maisy's dad says. We all laugh at that. I can only imagine Maisy as a kid.

"Hey, I wasn't that bad," Maisy says.

"You crashed your tricycle into your mother's car so hard that is scratched the whole back," he says and we laugh.

"Pheebs, you're up," Jess calls out. I go up and swing. Of course, I miss the easiest hole and my ball stops in the grass. Well, I'm good at other things.

After we play and we finish my dad ends up winning followed by Jessica's dad, Natalie's dad, Natalie, Jess, then me. Oh well. I am not too heartbroken over it.

"You're lucky you are pretty, Grey," Maisy teases making me laugh.

"Shut up," I say.

We all say goodbye and head our separate ways. Dad's day was so much fun. It was so good having my dad here too. He heads home tonight because he goes to Taiwan tomorrow for work.

Saying goodbye is always hard, but knowing that I get to see him in a month makes it easier.

—-

Yesterday was Andrew's birthday. And we went hard. We went to the easiest bar on campus to get into underage and drank a lot. The hangover this morning almost wasn't worth all the fun we had last night.

Andrew ended up sleeping on our floor and when we woke up this morning we had 5 people sleeping in our room. Maisy and Regan couldn't make it back to there's. To say this day has consisted of a lot of Pedialyte, crackers, and vomiting is putting it lightly.

Tonight I am taking Andrew to dinner just the two of us. He took me to dinner for my birthday, so I am keeping the tradition going. We are going to a Mexican restaurant called Burrito Loco. It is so yummy and I am very excited to have real food.

I put on a silk camisole top, jeans, and a sweater. It is simple yet flattering. I put my hair in a messy yet styled low bun and put on some light makeup. "How you are getting out of bed is beyond me," I hear Olivia say. She is still in sweatpants and a T-shirt. Her wet hair pulled into a bun.

"It's the best cure to a hangover," I say.

"I thought that was a Bloody Mary," she says making me laugh.

"That too, anyway I am leaving. Call if you need anything," I say putting on lipstick.

"If you want to bring me guac and chips be my guest," she says and I smirk walking out.

When I get to the front I see Andrew waiting for me. "You look nice," he says and we lock elbows.

"I look better than I feel, I need real food," I say and he laughs.

"I have never been so hungover," he says shaking his head.

"I know, Olivia still is in bed," I say and he laughs.

"pour Liv, I don't think she knew her own name last night," he says and I laugh.

"Lord help that girl," I say.

We finish walking to the restaurant and go in getting seated. We are on the patio and get chips and salsa. I eat a couple of chips and chug the water that gets set down. I need to rehydrate myself.

"What are you going to get?" He asks as we look over the menu.

"I think the burrito Verde," I say and he nods.

"I think I am getting the burrito grande with chicken," he says.

"That sounds good too," I say.

"So how is Nathan?" He asks.

"He is good, now that basketball season is done he has a lot more free time," I say.

"I saw, that was a tough loss to Georgia," he says and I nod.

"Very tough. Nathan was not a happy camper," I say making him laugh.

"I wouldn't have been either. I wasn't just watching it," he says.

"But he does have so much more time now to go out and focus on school," I say and he nods.

"I get it, speaking of how is psychology," he asks.

"So great, we are learning about child development right now. It is so fascinating," I say.

"Only you, Phoebe Grey, would find that fascinating," he says. I stick my tongue out at him.

"Whatever, how is business?" I ask him.

"Pretty good, the rumor going around is that they are redoing the program and making it so much better," he says. I wonder if that has anything to do with my dad.

"How so?" I ask.

"Apparently, a girl heard something about making kids get internships before they graduate and changing the course work," he says and I nod. Well, it isn't a rumor. I don't know if I am allowed to say anything, so I play dumb.

"That is pretty cool. Where would you intern?" I ask.

"I am guessing businesses around Washington. Maybe you could tell your dad about me," he says jokingly. Little does he know.

"Maybe I should," I say. The waiter comes over and takes our order.

"So did you hear about Todd Smith and Leanna Blackburn?" He asks. I know Leanna from rush. She is a delta gamma here.

"No what about them?" I ask.

"They got caught doing coke in a bathroom at Easy's by a security guard. They both got arrested and taken into custody," he says. My mouth drops open. Leanna seemed like the most innocent and well-rounded girl. I didn't even know she drank.

"Jeez, are they out now?" I ask.

"Yeah, their parents paid bail. Just a reminder to never go to Easy's unless you are 21," he says. Easy's is a bar on campus that is super strict. I don't even know how they got in.

"I wouldn't even try," I say and he nods.

"I wouldn't either. But on the topic of bars I have a question," he says.

"Hopefully I will have an answer," I say.

"Did you see Lindsey Hunt last night?" He asks. Oh yes, I did. Lindsey is what one may call a whore. She hooks up with anything that moves. Usually, I wouldn't talk this bad about a person, but on my birthday she tried to sink her claws into Nathan.

"Yeah, I saw her. She was barely wearing clothing," I say and he rolls his eyes.

"She was flirting with me the entire night. And then when I got home she added me on snap," he says.

"Aw she needs a new fuck," I say and he shakes his head.

"You are missing the point, she is into me," he says.

"So is half the population of this school," I say.

"Like who?" He asks.

"Lyla, Maisy for the longest time, Julia, Elizabeth, Maddie, Christina, so I need to name more?" I ask. Our food gets delivered and he is shaking his head.

"None of them actually wanted anything except sex," he says.

"And what do you think Lindsey wants?" I ask him. He is stumped at my question.

"And Maisy wanted way more than sex, but you friend zoned her," I say and he rolls his eyes.

"If we dated it would have ended so badly," he says and I shake my head.

"Not the point. You can't get with Lindsey she probably has like five STDs," I say and he laughs.

"Okay Grey, whatever we are dropping this conversation," he says and I nod.

"How is the big burrito?"

"Pretty good, how is your green burrito?"

"Unbelievable," I smirk.

We finish up eating and decide to get dessert. We get him a flan cake and they come and sing happy birthday in Spanish. It is very funny because he turns bright red. I video him and post it to my story.

"I hate you," he laughs.

"No, you don't," I smirk.

"I know," he says. We share the yummy cake and end up finishing it. I order a to go order of chips and guac for my very hungover roommate.

We walk back to my dorm and I give Andrew a hug goodbye. "You don't need to settle for Lindsey," I tell him and he smiles down at me.

"You kill me, Grey. Thank you for dinner," he says and I smile.

"No problem, I'll see you this weekend?" I ask him.

"Of course, take care of yourself and Olivia," he says before we bid each other goodbye.

"Chips and guac for the walking zombie," I tease Olivia. She takes the bag and laughs.

"Grey, I owe you a life," she says and I laugh.

I finish up my night by watching a movie with Olivia. I love my friends at school so much. They all bring so much freaking joy into my life.

_**APRIL **_

April showers bring stress. This week I am so busy. School has been kicking my ass recently. I am trying to figure out next year while finishing out this year.

The girls and I are apartment hunting today. After that, I am meeting a study group at the library. Busy is an understatement. I have on a pair of shorts and a T-shirt. We have three apartments to look at all in our price range.

We walk up to the first one. Its location is ideal for my classes and just college life in general. There is the drug store just down the street and it's near the sorority house.

"I like the location of this one," I say.

"Yes, it is super nice to be close to the frats and sororities," Liv says.

We walk in and there is a big kitchen and living space. "This is so nice. Phoebe can cook us dinner while we watch tv," Maisy says.

"Keep dreaming," I say making them laugh. We walk through the bedrooms which are the same size. I can already think about what I want to do to mine. If we pick this one.

There are two bathrooms both with showers which I doubt will become an issue. We are pretty good about respecting each others time and space.

"I like this one a lot, there is enough space for all of us," Liv says.

"Yes this was a very good start, let's go to the next two and then we can narrow down our decision," I suggest.

We head over to the next one. The location of this one isn't ideal. It is quite far from campus life. Going to class would be a 15-minute walk and if I have an 8 am then that would be hell.

"This is 20 minutes from my business building," Olivia says.

"Yeah the location kind of sucks," I say.

"I already don't walk to class when I know it is cold out. This would be a whole new game," she says making us laugh.

We walk up to the apartment and go in. It is the same size as the other one. The kitchen has a little more room. The bedrooms are also bigger.

"The room sizes are nice, but we only have one bathroom with a shower," Maisy says.

"That's true. The bedrooms are big," Liv says.

We head over to the third. I am really doubting we pick the second. Even though it was bigger it still was too far. When we get to the third I can tell the girls are not into it.

It is close to campus, but it is over the sub shop. There is a separate entrance but still. I would gain 20 pounds living over this. Not good for me.

"I am not living over a sub shop," Maisy says.

"It's not ideal," I say trying to not throw it away before we even see it.

It is a tiny little thing. The rooms are the size of my closet back at home. Maisy and Olivia both hate the place. "No, this isn't it," Olivia says.

"Yeah no way," Maisy says.

"Okay so if it's not this one which one are you guys thinking?" I ask.

"The first," they say at the same time. I laugh and nod. That one was the best location and room situation. It also had a balcony.

"The first it is then. Let's put our bid in tomorrow night," I suggest. They both agree.

"Let's go drink to this," Maisy says as we walk out.

"I can't I have to study," I say and they look at me like I'm crazy.

"What?" I ask.

"We just got our apartment, come on PG," Olivia says.

"I can't two tests tomorrow. You guys go and have fun. If I finish early I will meet you," I tell them.

"Deal, have fun studying, Grey," Maisy says and hugs me. I hug Liv before we bid each other goodbye.

I head to the library after I grab my backpack. I go to the third floor which is the quiet floor. I grab myself a coffee and sit down. I review all my notes for calc and start redoing some of the problems.

After an hour of doing it, I am still struggling. I can't figure out how to solve the problems. I am getting so frustrated. Taking a deep breath, I move on to psych. I open my notes and start studying them.

It is so easy for me to review these. Math makes me feel so dumb. I hate it so much. I continue studying my psych terms and reviewing for that test.

When I am all psyched out I have to go back to math. I open my binder and sigh. Slowly, I start working my way through the problems. Frustration builds as I keep going. After what feels like hours, I still am struggling with one type of the problems.

I really do feel like crying as I check the time. I see it is one thirty in the morning. I have been here for six hours. That's when the dam breaks. I am just so frustrated and tired.

I decide to head home. Maybe Nathan is awake. I hit his number and hold the phone up to my ear.

"Bee? Hello?" I hear loud club music and a very drunk Nathan. Shit.

"Hey I'll call you back tomorrow, I'm sorry for calling," I say.

"No Bee, Bee hey," oh lord he is drunk.

"Nathan, I got to go," I say and just hang up.

I wipe my eyes as I head towards my dorm. I know I can't be mad at him for going out and drinking. Basketball season is over and I do it all the time. I really just wish he was sober right now.

As I walk into my dorm I'm getting drunk text bombed from Nathan. He is so sweet for wanting to check in, but I need sleep. I turn my phone off and crawl into bed. I can't deal with this right now.

—

I am on my way home right now because Easter is this Sunday. I am so excited to get to spend time with my family. Especially after how stressed I was last week.

It's finally starting to warm up, so as Sawyer and I drive through our neighborhood we have the windows down. When we get to our house, I walk inside. I put my suitcase down and both my parents rush over to hug me.

"Hi baby," my mom says as she kisses my head.

"Hi mom, how are you guys?" I ask.

"Glad to have you home," my dad says as he hugs me.

We sit down at the kitchen table and my mom passes me a cut up orange. "Can you believe it's already Easter?" I ask.

"Not at all, I'm glad it is though. I love Easter," my mom says.

"I do too, it's a great holiday," I say.

"Do you remember the Easter where we went to the Easter egg hunt and you cut your chin open? My dad asks. My mom starts shaking her head.

"I have no memory of this," I say.

"Oh my lord, were you an accident-prone child," my dad says laughing.

(Flashback Phoebe 4 Christian's POV)

I am helping my son button up his dress shirt. Ana has him in a green striped dress shirt and white dress shorts. I know that they are going to get ruined in 5 seconds with my almost 7-year-olds play habits.

"Do I have to wear this Dad?" Teddy asks sighing. "I feel stupid," he says.

"Hey we don't use that word in this house, you look very handsome," I say.

"Uh huh," he says and crosses his arms. He really is my mini-me. I tickle his belly and flip him upside down making him break down in giggles. His laugh is the most contagious thing.

"Come on let's go find your sister and Mom so we can head over to grandma graces for the Easter egg hunt," I say and he nods. I take his hand in mine and we walk downstairs. I see Ana dressed and ready to go bent down putting Phoebe's shoes on.

"You look beautiful," I say to Ana and I give her a kiss.

"Daddy, look at my Easter Dress," Phoebe says and twirls.

We have had to keep this dress hidden from Phoebe for the past week because every time she sees it she says to put it on. It is a white dress with pink roses. The reason she loves it so much is because there is tool underneath to give it a little poof. Which she says makes her a princess.

"You look beautiful, Bubs," I say and pick her up kissing her cheek. Ana fusses over how handsome Ted looks.

Gail takes an abundance of family photos before we head out to my parents. They do a huge Easter egg hunt every year the day before Easter. There are always so many kids and families there.

This is the first year Phoebe can do the hunt without one of us with her. I will still be keeping a close eye on her though. Phoebe is so excited to show off her dress to everyone. Even though right when we get there she will become shy.

When we get to my parents we park the car and walk in. I have Phoebe on my hip and she is talking to me about her dream she had last night. "And then you tolds the mean man he's not allowed to take my popsicle," she says.

"Wow sounds like a crazy dream," I say and she nods.

"Hi guys," my mom greets us. She dotes over the kid's outfits. Phoebe refuses to get put down even when my mom tries to take her.

"Give her some time to warm up," I tell my mom.

"Grandma has some special treats for you when you want them come find me okay?" She tells Phoebe giving her a kiss.

The backyard is decked out. There is a bounce house, a ball pit, and an Easter bunny to take pictures with. Ted runs off instantly to go find friends. He makes friends whenever we go.

Ana and I get glasses of water. We sit down at a table with Elliot and Kate. I set my Bubs down on a chair next to me and pass her water. Ava walks over to Phoebe in her blue Easter dress. Ava is a darling girl.

"Hi Beebs," Ava says. Kate calls Phoebe Pheebs and Ava tries to too, but it comes out more like Beebs. Very cute.

"Hi Ava," Phoebe says waving.

"Want to come to play with me?" Ava asks. I love eavesdropping on their conversations.

"Mhmm I have to tell my daddy though," Phoebe says.

"Daddy, I go play with Ava," she says.

"Okay be careful. Mommy and I will be right here if you need us," I say and she smiles. Ava and she held hands and run towards the bounce house.

I talk to Elliot about baseball while I glance over at the girls in the bounce house. Phoebe and Ava are dying laughing while holding hands and bouncing. It is so cute to watch. They bounce with the other kids having a great time.

"Wanna go grab a beer?" Elliot asks. I nod to him and we head inside the house. My mom has a whole buffet of food set up. We both grab a beer and pick at the buffet.

It's only a matter of time before my mom finds us and kicks us out of the buffet. Some things never change. This is obviously one of them. We walk outside to find the girls getting their faces painted.

Elliot and I head over. "Daddy daddy daddy," I hear and I know exactly who is calling for me.

"Where'd my Bubs go?" I ask. Phoebe starts laughing.

"I right here, daddy I am a fairy princess," she says. It looks like pink and purple threw up on her face.

"I see that you look pretty," I say and she smiles. I take a bunch of pictures of her.

It is announced that the Easter egg hunt will start soon so the kids need to get their baskets. Phoebe grabs hers and i take pictures of her and Ted with theirs. They are so cute.

"On your marks… get set… go," I hear. All the kids go off running. Phoebe and Ava hold hands laughing and running around the yard.

About five minutes in I am watching the girls run around. All of a sudden I see the Phoebe fall. Not just on her knees but slam onto the corner of the patio stairs. Before I know it I am on my feet running to her.

I pick her up and she is sobbing. Blood is all over her mouth and chin. Shit. I run her inside while she is sobbing. She sees the blood and starts freaking out.

"Daddy, help, daddy," she sobs.

"Shhh, I got you, baby. You are okay," I say trying to be calm. Ana was with Teddy last I saw, I know she didn't see her fall.

"Gretchen, will you get my mother please?" I ask urgently. I have Phoebe on the counter holding her little arms down as I hold pressure against her lip and chin.

"Baby, I know you are scared, but you have to let daddy help you okay?" I say. She is still just a hysterical mess. Her chin is really bleeding.

Ana and my mom both run in at the same time. "Let me get my bag, take her to the master bathroom," my mom says.

I pick her up with Ana hot on my trail. We run to the master bedroom. I set her on the counter as my mom comes in. "Mommy Daddy it it i hurts," she cries.

"I know baby, you have to let grandma help

You okay," Ana says holding her hands.

"Daddy holds me" Phoebe sobs. I feel so bad for this little girl. Why did I let her go off without me holding her hand?

"Okay baby, Daddy will hold you," I put her on my lap and sit on the counter. My mom is at eye level with Phoebe now.

"Shhh," Ana rubs Phoebe's back.

"Okay her chin is cut open. I am going to have to glue it shut," my mom says. Shit.

"Phoebe, you hurt your chin pretty bad okay? Grandma is going to have to fix it, can you be a big girl and help grandma?" Ana asks. She is so good when the kids are hurt. Phoebe shakes her head. I am holding the towel against her chin so she doesn't see the blood.

"I can do a numbing cream to try and help

ease the pain," my mom says and we both nod.

I hold Phoebe's arms down as she puts the cream on. "See that wasn't so bad," my mom says.

"Daddy, I scared," Phoebe says.

"I know baby, but you are so brave and daddy will be here the whole time holding you," I say. She nods and wipes her nose.

"Okay Phoebe, this may sting a little. Hold daddy's hand," Ana holds Phoebe's chin up and I hold her arms down while holding her hands. She screams and sobs as my mom glued her chin shut.

We have to hold it like that for what feels like forever. Finally, we can let her go and Phoebe sobs. I turn her into my chest and she sobs into my shirt. This poor girl.

"It's all done, you did so good baby," I try to comfort her but I know it is no use.

I take her to the room with the glider chair and sit on it rocking her back and forth. Ana comes in and sings quietly to her. Phoebe loves when Ana sings.

"You are my sunshine, my only sunshine," Ana sings to her. I rub Phoebe's back as she sobs.

Before we know it Phoebe is asleep sitting astride me. I keep her like this and I look to Ana who leans over and kisses me.

"There is no other person in the world that I would rather do this parenting thing with," she says and kisses me. This woman.

(End flashback)

I am dying laughing. "Well let's hope this weekend goes better than that, I was so accident prone," I say. Both my parents laugh.

"Let's hope it goes better too," my dad says.

"I hope it will, that was a wild weekend," my mom jokes.

—

Easter weekend was so much fun. On Saturday I went to Nathan's family brunch and on Sunday I spent the whole day at grandma graces. But it is now back to school for me. Which isn't a bad thing at all. I am actually excited to be back.

My friends and I are going to a concert tonight. It's a band that Maisy loves and I like some of their music too. We are all in Maisy's room getting ready. She did my hair in two French braids.

"Phoebe your hair is so long it can be used to strangle someone," Maisy says and I laugh.

"Shut up," I say as I do my makeup.

Since it is finally warm out again, I wear an outfit my father would beat me if he saw. I put on a floral mesh shirt. It is completely see-through so I pair it with a cute bralette and jean skirt.

"Hot damn, Grey," I hear Olivia say.

"Shut up," I laugh.

Once we have taken a fair amount of pictures we head out. On the way there in the Uber, we pass around a water bottle full of vodka. It is enough to get us all buzzed before we go.

We walk into the venue. It is general admission only so there are no seats. It is just one big open space in front of the stage. Let's just say I wasn't completely honest when I said to my dad that it was a small little venue with assigned seats.

Sawyer is waiting in the car because he doesn't really know how big this concert is going to get either. I'll take the rath from that later. The opening act starts and we shove our way to pretty close to the front.

"This is fucking awesome," Maisy says over the loud music.

We jump up and down to the beat of the song. This is my first time at a concert like this. There are people on every side of me I feel so hot and sweaty. But this is so fun. I guess this is what I missed from my sheltered life.

The person behind me keeps getting super close, but I think it's just because there is almost no room here. When I say almost no room I mean no room. The main act comes on and everyone goes nuts.

Maisy is about to cry she is so happy. They play their opening song and the hand behind my creeps around my wait as I dance. What the fuck? I push the hand away, but don't look back. Maybe they thought I was someone they knew.

We keep dancing around. I have people on every single side of me. It is insane in the mosh pit. Everyone is dancing and being buzzed makes it better.

The person behind me presses up against me. Okay seriously? I say it in Olivia's ear and she turns around. "Get off her," I hear Olivia yell over the music.

Suddenly a hand comes up and under my skirt and grabs my ass. I turn around and see a guy way older than us. Maybe in his 40s standing there. I slap him across the face.

"Don't ducking touch me," I yell. Maisy and Olivia both grab my hand and pull me away.

We go to the side in the back. "Phoebe, holy fuck what was that?" Olivia asks.

"He grabbed my ass," I say.

"So you slapped him?" She asks.

"Well yeah," they both look at each other and start laughing.

"Jesus Grey, it's like you want to die," she says and I smile.

The concert is so much fun. Even after the pervert tried to grab my ass. I am glad I smacked him. I am sure my mom would appreciate that story. We all 3 grab waters on the way out.

We get in Sawyer's car and he turns to me. "100 people maximum?" He says. "Really Phoebe?" Uh oh. He is not happy.

"Sawyer come on, it was like 300 max I was a little off," I say.

"Phoebe, are you crazy? That was almost 800 people. You can't lie to me like that. I could have lost you. What would have happened if you got hurt?" He asks.

"I'm sorry, I just didn't want security in the pit with me," I say and he sighs.

"I get that, please just tell me next time. When do I not let you do whatever you want?" He asks.

"Good point, I'm sorry Sawyer," I say and hug him. My friends laugh from the back.

He drives us 4 home and when we go upstairs we all shower. After we go into the common room and turn on the bachelor. "Phoebe, has anyone told you Sawyer is kinda hot?" Maisy asks.

"I tell her every day," Olivia says.

"Me too," Regan says.

"Ew guys that's like my second dad," I say.

"Daddy," Olivia and Maisy both say at the same time.

"Ew oh my lord. You two are fucked up," I say. They both laugh and high five each other.

Next week is exams then summer. I can't believe how fast this year is going by. I love it so much, but I am also ready for summer and to see Ava and Nathan. It will be so good to be home.

Exam week also known as hell week. I have never been so stressed out in my life. I am running on 6 hours of sleep between the past 3 days. The barista at the brew knows me by name.

I have lived at the library these past couple days. I take my psychology exam tomorrow and that is the most important one I take all year. I have been studying for 5 hours for it. I am on my third coffee.

At 3 in the morning, I head back to my dorm. My exam tomorrow isn't til 9 tomorrow. That means I can get around 5 hours of sleep. Olivia is dead asleep as I walk in so I climb up on my bed and pass out.

I wake up to my alarm and feel dead. This is my last exam and I can come home and sleep after. I am so excited. I put on my backpack and stay in my clothes from yesterday and head out.

I sit in my assigned seat and get out my pencils. The test takes forever to be distributed and finally, I can start taking it. I remember what Nathan told me. Breathe and focus you can do this.

As time is called I feel really good about it. About to pass out, but still very good. I walk back to my dorm. Olivia has an exam right now so I turn off my lights and head to bed.

"Phoebe, Phoebe," I slowly wake up. I sit up and rub my eyes. It is dark out and I am so confused.

"What happened?" I ask. Olivia is standing there in her robe.

"It is 8 you have been asleep since noon. Go shower we are going out," she says.

"We are?" I ask.

"We just finished hell week of course we are. Now go," she says ripping my sheets off me. A shower does sound kind of nice.

I head to the showers and take my time showering. I still feel pretty groggy, but nothing a good shower won't fix. After I shower I head back to the room. Olivia is doing her makeup.

I sit in my bathrobe and start drying my hair. "Where are we going?" I ask.

"Sigma Chi, they are having a final party," she says and I nod.

We get ready listening to our playlist. It's sad to think this is the last time we will do this in our dorm room. It has been such a good year it blows my mind.

We get dressed and get Regan and Maisy. We head out towards the frat. When we get there I see Andrew on the porch. "Andrew," I yell and run up to him.

"Pheebs you look good, I am surprised to see you out," he says.

"Eight-hour nap," I say and he laughs.

"Yeah let's get you a drink," he says and I laugh.

Andrew makes me a drink and passes it to me. I thank him and we walk out to the dance floor. We dance and he goes off making me laugh. He is such a bad dancer.

"Andrew," I hear a girl say. I turn to see Lindsey Hutchinson walking towards him.

"Ew, find me later okay. Use protection lord knows what she has," I say and Andrew laughs.

I go up to Caroline who practically tackled me. "Phoebe Grey," She says.

"Why haven't I seen you in years," she says.

"I saw you in the library two days ago," I laugh.

"I was two Adderall and 4 coffees in. Exams are a blur," she says making me laugh.

"Sounds like you had a death wish. Anyway, when do you go home?" I ask her.

"Uhm like 10 hours," she says.

"Tomorrow?" I ask her.

"Yeah I hope to still be drunk," she says.

"Uh huh, how is my brother?" I ask her. She smirks and playfully pushes me.

"The best thing on the planet," she says and I laugh. They have both been trying to keep from me that they are talking. But whenever Caroline is drunk she tells me how amazing he is.

"Are you going to come visit me this summer?" I ask her.

"Yep and you and me and Teddy can hang out," she says and I laugh.

"Uh huh," I smirk.

"Oh shut up, Grey," she says and I laugh.

After I talk to Caroline for awhile I head back to Olivia and Maisy. They are talking to Josh the sigma chi president.

"Hey Grey," he says.

"Oh hey, Josh, what's up?" I ask him.

"Just living life, Grey," he smirks. I have never really talked to Josh. I'm surprised he knows my name.

"Pheebs, you need many more drinks," Maisy says and drags me to the table.

We do shots for every hour of sleep we lost. Which maybe wasn't a good idea for me saying that I got 6 hours of sleep between 3 nights. After many many shots, I am shot. No pun intended.

I am drunk, to say the least. All of a sudden I see Andrew and he looks at me. "Damn Grey, did you chug a bottle of vodka?" He asks.

"Something like that, how was Lindsey?" I ask.

"She's great, are you okay there, Grey?" He asks.

"More than okay just very drunk," I say.

"I'll walk you home for old times sake tonight," he says and I smile. I would love nothing more.

After a few more drinks and lots of dancing, Andrew and I lock elbows. We set off for my dorm. "Can you believe it? I leave tomorrow," he says and I shake my head.

"It's crazy, like crazy," I say. He laughs and I can tell I am slurring my words. When we get to my dorm, Andrew comes up with me. I lay in my bed and pat the spot next to me.

"Grey, thanks for being a good friend this year," he says and I smile.

"Thanks for walking me home," I say.

"Aww, I wanna join," I laugh as Maisy and Olivia walk in. They both crawl on my bed. These people make me so happy.

We all cuddle in on my bed. It's a tight squeeze and I can barely move, but this makes my heart so happy. "I love you guys," Olivia says.

"I love you so much," I say and we have a group hug. I know these next 3 years won't be easy but with these people by my side it should be


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter 3

(Hi y'all hope you are all enjoying the story! Thank you guys for your support. Chapter four should be up in the next two weeks:)

_**SEPTEMBER **_

I am not ready to go back to school. This summer was the most amazing summer. I got to babysit the Cruz kids and love on them. Drew is a year old now! It is so crazy how fast they grow.

"Okay I think you are all settled in," my mom says as we finish my room in the apartment.

"It looks great in here, Bubs," my dad says and I nod smiling.

"I think so too. Thank you guys for helping me," I say and they both hug me.

My mom decorated my room mostly. It is white with pink and gold accents. I have a queen size bed and it's a novelty. I loved my dorm, but the twin size bed didn't do it for me.

"Are you ready for sophomore year?" My mom asks as we head out to the common area. Maisy decorated it in greys and blacks and it looks amazing. I plop down on the couch.

"I could have done another month of summer," I say and they smile.

"It's a hard goodbye. I loved getting you home for a bit," My mom says and my dad nods.

"It is a hard goodbye, it was with Nathan too," I say.

"Well if you ever need us to come just call us," my dad says and I nod.

"I know that's the beauty of staying in state for college," I say.

"Okay sweetheart. We will give you peace, I know you have plans tonight," My mom says.

"It's just dinner here with some friends," I say and they smile.

"We don't want to interrupt that," my dad says as he comes over and gives me the biggest hug.

"I love you so much, Bubs," he says.

"I love you too, Dad," I say.

"Bye sweet girl, I love you," my mom says.

"Love you too," I smile as we hug.

"Okay, remember to be safe and call if you need us," My dad says.

"I know, I love you guys," I say as they head out after my dad gives me one more hug.

I am left in our apartment by myself. The girls went out to grocery shop. I sit down on the couch and turn on the TV. I look around the apartment. It is so nice, our kitchen is so cute, so is our dining room and a little living area.

I watch some HGTV and before I know it the door opens to Olivia and Maisy. I get up and help them carry the groceries in. We start putting stuff away as they talk about the store.

"Okay, so who's all coming tonight?" Olivia asks.

"Regan, Andrew, and maybe Kendra," I say.

"Aw yay, so we are ordering pizza right," Maisy says.

"Unless you are cooking," Olivia says.

"Yeah hell to the no," she says making us laugh.

"I got beer and appetizers though," she smiles and shows me.

"How'd you get the beer?" I ask.

"I'm 21 in Maryland," she says pulling out her fake ID. I laugh and shake my head.

"I'm showering and getting ready," I say and head out.

I shower and straighten my hair. I put on a little bit of makeup and get dressed. I wear jeans and a lace silk camisole. I walk out to see Maisy all ready and Olivia doing her makeup in the bathroom.

"Okay let's get some music playing, then I need a drink," Maisy says. She turns on our Alexa to dinner party music making me laugh.

"What?" She asks.

"Mase, we are 19, not 49, you can turn on some regular music," I say and she laughs and does.

Olivia walks out and grabs a beer. The doorbell rings and I open it to see Andrew and Regan. "Hey guys," I give Regan the biggest hug and when she walks away Andrew picks me up and spins me around.

"Grey, you look great," he says.

"Speak for yourself, I am so glad to see you," I say.

"I know, it has been too long without you," he says.

We walk inside and everyone has a beer and is talking about their summer. Andrew went to Ireland with his family and paraglided. Regan interned at her dad's business. Maisy well Maisy drank with her friends. And Olivia nannied for her cousins.

I tell them about the Cruz kids and hanging out with Ava and Nathan. My summer was so much fun and talking about it makes me miss home. I don't know why it is so hard to come back.

We sit down at the table and eat our pizza. The conversation flows easily. "Phoebe, what's your class schedule looking like? Any 8 am classes?" Maisy asks.

"Luckily no. My earliest is a 10am on Thursday's and Tuesday's. I have two classes on Wednesday and one on Monday," I say.

"I have an 8am in Wednesday's I don't know how I got screwed over with that," Maisy says.

"I'm guessing you are not going tomorrow?" I say.

"Oh hell no, over my dead body," she says and I laugh.

"Did you guys here Teek is having a toga party next Saturday?" Regan asks.

"No way, I've always wanted to go to one of those," Maisy says.

"What's a toga party?" Andrew asks.

"It's a Greek-themed party. You wear clothes made out of bed sheets to look like what the Greeks did," Maisy says.

"Great explanation," Olivia high fives her and we all laugh.

"It should look like this," Olivia shows Andrew a picture.

"Oh, that looks so fun. We are all going," Andrew says.

"Hell yeah we are, I'm excited," Olivia says.

The rest of the night we drink and talk about life and school. Regan starts to talk about when she went to a waterpark drunk. It makes me think back to this summer when Nathan and I took the Cruz kids to the water park.

(Flashback)

"Okay guys everyone get in their swimsuits," I say as I help Spencer but on her floral bikini with the ruffled skirt. She looks so adorable. The boys both put on their board shorts. Drew is staying with the grandparents for the day.

"Natin, you likes my swimsuit?" Spencer asks and pulls on his swim trunks.

"I love it, you look like a princess," he says and she smiles.

"Okay, guys let's head out to the car," I say.

"Natin holds me," Spencer says. Nathan picks her up and helps her zip her cover-up. We go out to Nathan's car and the kids all get buckled in. I help Quinn with his seatbelt while Nathan straps Spencer into her car seat.

"Okay, here we go," we drive off towards the water park. The kids sing the pop songs on the radio and Nathan and I laugh at them. They are so cute.

"Nathan, do you have your jersey?" Quinn asks.

"From this past year?" Nathan asks.

"Yeah," Charlie says.

"I do, it's at my house," he says.

"Can we see it?" Charlie asks.

"Yeah I'll bring it over one day," Nathan says and they smile.

When we get to the park the kids get wristbands put on them. I am walking with the boys and Nathan is holding Spencer. We put our stuff down on a lounge chair.

"Sunscreen time," I say and the boys groan.

"No sunscreen no water," I say.

"Okay me first," Charlie grumbles. I use the spray lotion and spray him. I use the lotion on his face and he looks less than pleased. Quinn jumps in front of me.

"My turn," he smirks. This little womanizer.

I spray his back then the front. He pretends to flex his muscles when I spray his arms. "Look at you," I say and he giggles. This boy.

"Spencer, your turn," I say. Nathan sets her down and I start spraying her. I have to be very gentle with her face because she is super sensitive. I use the face stick.

"Your turn," Nathan says. I laugh and let him spray me, then I spray him. We all get into our bathing suits. I am wearing my black high waisted bikini.

"Okay, where do we wanna go first?" I ask them.

"Lazy river," the boys shout at the same time.

"Okay let's go," I smile. We walk over and grab tubes for everyone. The rule of the lazy river is everyone has to be in a tube.

I put the boys on a tube and Spencer on my lap. We all four hook tubes. Nathan grabs the boys and I grab his. Spencer is loving every minute of this. She waves to Nathan and he waves back making her giggle.

We go under a water dispenser and the kids laugh so hard. It gets bumpy at some points and Spencer death grips my legs. The boys are having so much fun it makes me smile.

We get out of the lazy river and decide to go on the family ride. It is a ride that fits 5 people in one circular tube. We put Spencer between Nathan and me. The boys huddle together in excitement.

We get pushed down and the tube goes into complete darkness. Spencer screams and I feel her jump onto Nathan's arms. She starts screaming crying. The boys are screaming because they are having fun.

"Yeahhhhh," Quinn screams. We shoot out the end into the sunlight and Spencer is screaming crying.

"Shhhh, Spencer it is all over," I try consoling her.

"Bee Bee dark," she cries and I know she was afraid of the dark. I should have thought about that.

We all get out of the tube. I am holding a sobbing Spencer. I rock her back and forth. "Boys why don't we go see the water park," I say. They have an actual water park with mini water slides and a playground. It is very cute.

"Yeah yeah," they both say. They run over and Nathan and I walk behind them. When we sit down to watch the boys play Spencer is still sobbing.

"Hey no more crying, it's supposed to be a fun day," I bounce her trying to make her smile. She just sobs harder.

"Here," Nathan says and I pass her over. She cries into his chest.

"Shhh, Spencer it is all done now. You don't have to do it again," he says trying to console her.

"It's scared me," she cries.

"I know, but you are such a brave girl for going on the ride you know that?" He asks. She nods and I lean in wiping her eyes.

"I don't wanna go on those," she points to the big ones.

"You don't have to, we can play in the fun little pool and Bee can take the boys," Nathan says. Spencer smiles and nods resting her head in his chest.

"Okay, thanks you," she says and I smile.

I take the boys onto the toilet bowl ride. Then the green slide, then the cyclone, then the family ride. They are starting to get warm out. I take them to the pool in front of our chair. I go to sit on the lounge chair and I see Nathan. With a bundle of towels on him.

"Oh my," I say as I see Spence on him sleeping with towels wrapped around her. I look at her cheek squished against him and she is out.

"She is out for the count," I say.

"We played hard in the playground," he says and I laugh.

"We should get them home for a nap. The boys are pooped too," I say. I head over to get the boys. They are less than pleased to be leaving. We walk out with me holding Spencer. I slip her into her car seat and buckle her. Nathan drives us all home.

"Would you look at that," he says and I look behind me. All three kids are asleep. It was the sun and running around. It got them.

When we get them back to their house we used them in. They are all three still in bathing suits. "Boys go change, I will be up in two minutes to check," I say. They run up accepting the challenge.

I go upstairs with Spencer and change her into PJs. I braid her hair so it doesn't get knotty while she sleeps. "I wanna see Nathan," she says.

"He's downstairs," I say.

"Please," she smiles. I smirk and walk her down. When I Peek in the boy's room they both have PJs on and are in their bed waiting for a story.

"Hi sweets," He says to Spencer.

"Hi, Natin, can you and Bee Bee puts me to bed?" She asks. He looks at me and I smile.

"We owe her one for what we put her through," he says and I laugh.

"Okay let me go put the boys down. You go wait for me and pick a book," I say heading into the boy's room.

I read them green eggs and ham before they fall asleep. I tuck them both in and kiss their heads. I head back into Spencer's room. "Okay, what'd we pick?" I ask.

"Owen," Spencer says. Owen is about a little mouse who can't get rid of his blanket. I pass the book to Nathan. I rub Spencer's hair as he reads. She is asleep by page 4.

I pull back and we sneak out of the room. As we walk out we high five. No one else I would rather do this with.

(End flashback)

I really do miss my Nathan. The next time I'll see him is in November. Not very good. It makes me so sad. I already miss him so much. How am I going to get through this year?

—-

This week has been real. Classes started up on Monday. Already I have a ton of work to do. For some reason, it has been really hard to settle in this time. I am really just having doubts and negative thoughts. Nathan has offered to fly out, but I know he has practice and all that.

Tonight is the toga party. I am very excited about it. Hopefully, this gets me out of the funk that I am in. We all have our bed sheets and Kendra is coming over to help us cut and tape them.

We are all getting ready in our apartment. After I am all ready and waiting for Kendra I decide to call Nathan. He answers after one ring.

"Hey, baby, what's up?" He asks.

"Nothing, just calling to hear your voice," I say.

"How are you feeling today?" He asks.

"Um okay I guess, I just am missing you," I admit. He sighs and I frown.

"I miss you too, are you sure you don't want me to book a flight?" He asks.

"No Nathan, you can't. We will see each other in November," and as I say that I get a nervous feeling in my stomach.

"I'm just a little worried about you," he says.

"Don't be, it's just first week jitters," I lie.

"Well, what are you doing tonight?" He asks.

"We have a toga party," I say.

"Oh that's so fun, you'll have to send me pics," he says.

"What kind of pics are we talking?" I smirk. Nathan and I have had our fair share of pictures sent back and forth. Keeping our long distance relationship alive.

"Cheeky girl, pictures of you in the toga and what's underneath," he says and I smirk.

"We'll see," I say and he laughs.

"Well have so much fun, my girl," he says.

"I love you," I say.

"I love you more," we bid each other goodbye and when I hang up I fight the urge to cry. I just am feeling so insecure. I just wish he could hold me.

"Phoebe come on your turn," I hear Kendra call. I grab my sheet and wipe my eyes. I go out and Kendra has me stand in my bra and underwear while she wraps and does the toga.

When she finishes I am amazed. She has made a short one shoulder toga dress. It is so cute and fits so well. "This is a talent Kendra," I say and she shrugs.

"Lots of practice," she says and I laugh.

We pregame at our place then head out. I am feeling pretty buzzed. The alcohol is getting to my head. When we walk into the party I see Andrew and his roommate Colton talking.

"Grey, you look great," he says and wraps an arm around me. Colton says hi to me.

"Thanks, you don't look too bad yourself. Hey Colton," I say

"Isn't this party so fun," Colton says. Everyone has their own style of toga. Lots of girls made two pieces or bodycon dresses.

"I'm sure you like it," I say to him. Colton is what one would call a man-whore. He gets lots of girls.

"So how is Lindsey?" I ask Andrew.

"We hooked up a couple of times, but that was it," he says and I roll my eyes. Not shocking for Lindsey.

"So who is the new victim," I ask him. Colton starts laughing and walks away.

"What who is it?" I ask him he is bright red and keeps saying no one.

"Who tell me you butthole," I say.

"Fine fine, umm well after you guys had us over for dinner Maisy as you know came over to drop off my wallet. She ended up staying and talking," he says. I knew she was out for way too long. Andrew lives like two minutes walking distance from us.

"I knew something was weird. Did you guys fuck?" I ask.

"Brazen Grey, and no we didn't we just talked. I like her a lot," he says. Why wouldn't Maisy tell me?

"I'm so happy for you two," I say. I really am it's like my two best friends.

"Well it's nothing official, we are getting dinner on Saturday," he says and I smile.

"That makes me so happy," I say.

"Speaking of relationships, how is Nathan?" He asks.

"I miss him a lot, I really do," I say and he frowns.

"I'm sorry, Grey," he says and hugs me.

"It's okay, I'll work through it," I say.

"I'm always here for you, you know that," he says and I nod.

"I know let's go drink, enough of this sad talk," I say and wipe a stray tear.

"Okay, but you know I am always here," he says.

"I know, that's why I love you," I say and he laughs. We go to the bar and both get drinks. They are Greek-inspired cocktails. I get the Aphrodite and it is so good.

We walk out to the dance floor and Maisy runs up to us. I smirk at her and she blushes knowing he told me. "You'll be hearing from me later," I smirk as I drink.

"I'm sorry, hey Andrew," she says and gives him a hug.

"Hey Mase," he says.

"Oh my gosh, there's Caroline I haven't seen her since I have been back," I say and leave the two of them to talk.

"Grey," Caroline just about screams and runs up to me. Yeah, she is hammered.

"Hi Caroline," I laugh. Over the summer Caroline and Teddy started dating both my parents were so worried about me when they told us. I said I didn't care as long as they were honest.

"I missed you," she says.

"I know it has been a long month away from each other," I say. She came to visit in August. My parents like her a lot.

"How's that brother of yours?" She asks.

"As if you don't talk every day, he is good. Moved into his apartment last weekend," I say and she smiles.

"I know, we talked today," she says and I laugh.

"You are swoon," I say and she smirks.

"Yeah, pretty much, I am going to visit him next month," she says and I smile.

"That's so fun," I say.

"Yeah I'm so excited," she says. Aw, I would be too. I miss Nathan so much.

Caroline gets pulled away by her big to take a picture. I head over and see Maisy and Andrew talking still. Makes me miss Nathan even more. I am feeling pretty bummed out.

I decide to walk home. I say bye to Caroline and she says to call when I get to the apartment. I sneak out without saying bye to anyone else but Maisy who is pretty hammered too. I just want to be alone.

As I walk, I feel tears slip out of my eyes. Why is it so hard being away from him? It makes my heart hurt. I miss him so much.

I get to my apartment and walk in. I wipe my eyes and put my keys down. After washing my face and getting into PJs, I lay in my bed. Seeing Nathan would help so much. I don't know how I am going to do this.

—-

"Don't you have 24/7 security how are you going to do this?" Olivia asks me as I buy my plane ticket off her card.

"It's only for this weekend. I am going to tell him I'm sick so I am staying in, I'll sneak out with one of you when you go to class and he'll be watching the apartment," I say.

I'm going to see Nathan. I can't do this anymore. I have never felt so apart from him. I don't know what it is. I'm just having insecurities and worries. I don't have class and have the money to buy the ticket. The only problem is my dad.

He would never let me just go to New Jersey without a reason and well I don't have one. My reason is being insecure and stressed. My plan is to call Sawyer and say I have the flu. He won't come into the apartment and I won't go out. When Liv goes to class, I will sneak out with her.

I can't pay for a plane ticket with my credit card because Mr. Control will see. I paid Olivia in cash for the ticket and she is buying it for me. I am taking a taxi that I will pay for in cash and when I get there I just will use the money I have left.

Nathan doesn't really know I am coming. Like at all. If I told him I was coming he would insist on me telling my dad and really I just can't deal with that stress.

"Phoebe, I agree you need to see him, but is this the way to do it?" Maisy asks.

"It's the only way to do it without my dad driving here and sending me to a therapist," I say and they look at me.

"I'm just worried if something goes wrong, you won't have anyone there with you," Maisy says.

"I'll call you guys if anything goes wrong I promise," I say.

"Well, you better get packing," Maisy says. I smile and go over hugging them both.

"If you think this is what you need PG then you should do it," Olivia says.

"We hate seeing you like this," Maisy says.

"I know, and I hate feeling like it," I say.

"Well go pack and get a good night's sleep," Maisy says.

"I love you guys. Thank you for helping me," I say and they smile.

"Of course, we would help you anytime," Olivia says.

After I finish talking to them, I head into my room and grab my bag. I pack a toothbrush, pajamas, underwear, and one day outfit. I can't pack a suitcase because I'm sneaking out with Olivia.

For the plane, I pack some homework and headphones. I plan to catch up on some sleep too. Hopefully, this will be good for me and exactly what I need.

I also hope that Nathan has nothing going on. I have subtly asked him throughout the week and he has said nothing every time. So I am assuming he has nothing planned.

I am pretty nervous about my parents finding out. But I have the whole thing planned out pretty well. Maisy is right a lot can go wrong, but I just need to try it. I have been feeling so insecure about school and myself and Nathan always helps that.

The hardest part will be getting there and after that, it is smooth sailing. Once I return home I won't tell anyone it happened and Maisy and Liv are already sworn to secrecy. I'm nervous but I know this is what I need.

I take a quick shower and get in my bed. This weekend cannot come soon enough. All I want is a Nathan hug and for him to just reassure me that I can do this.

I curl up in my bed and say a prayer that I can get there without shit hitting the fan. I fall asleep quickly knowing that I will get to see Nathan.

—

My alarm goes off and I sit up yawning. I am so excited, but also so nervous. I get up and shower. I put my hair in a high ponytail and put on black leggings and a T-shirt. I bring a sweatshirt In case I get cold.

Last night I texted Sawyer I had the flu so I would be staying in the for the weekend. He asked if I needed anything and I said no. He told me to feel better and rest.

I come out and eat a banana. "You ready, Grey?" I hear Olivia say. My cab is called and is going to be in the back of my building. I nod and follow her.

We sneak out the front door and I run down the hall. I wait for Sawyer's text or call and nothing happens. I hug Olivia tightly.

"Be safe, Grey," she says.

"I will, thank you for all your help," I say and she smiles.

"Text me when you get there," she says and I nod.

"I will, I love you," I say.

"Love you more, now go you have a plane to catch," She says and I smile.

I head out the back door and get in the cab. I tell him to take me to the airport and slouch in my seat. The drive to the airport is a short one. I get out and pay the driver in cash. I get my bag and head inside.

I keep my hood up as I travel through the airport. After I get my boarding ticket and go through security I stop at the Starbucks. I am going to need this coffee to get me through this day.

I sit at my gate and keep to myself. My heart is beating so fast. I can't believe I am doing this right now. I look around and don't see anyone I know on my flight. Thank the lord. They start boarding my flight and I get in line.

I quickly scan my boarding ticket and head onto the plane. I pick a window seat and keep my hood up. An old woman asks if the seat next to me is open. I nod and move my bag under the seat.

This is only my second time flying on a non-private airplane. It is weird, but I couldn't have asked for the jet. The lady next to me smiles.

"First time flying alone?" She asks.

"Yes, it is," I say.

"You get used to it, do you go to Washington State?" She is a sweet old lady.

"Yes, I am a sophomore there," I say.

"So what brings you to New Jersey?" She asks.

"My boyfriend goes to Princeton," I say and smile.

"Smart boy, you are going to visit him I assume?" She asks.

"Yeah," I smile.

"I can tell by the way you look you are very much in love," she says and I smile.

"What brings you to New Jersey?" I ask her. Her distracting me is actually helping my major anxiety right now.

"Well, my husband passed away last month, we own a place in New Jersey and don't need it anymore. I am selling it and want to meet the family that wants to buy it. Not anyone can just buy that house. I want it to be people who I know will take care of it," she says and I smile.

"I'm sorry about your husband," I say.

"Thank you, sweetheart, Carl and I lived a very special life together. He was the love of my life, he passed away from lung cancer. We had time to process it together. I am glad he is not in pain anymore, but boy do I miss him," she says.

"I can't imagine that," I say and I truly can't.

"It makes me happy that you are going to visit your boyfriend. I can tell you two are in love, let me tell you, honey, never let that go. Even on the days that you are the most upset and mad forgive him life is too short," she says.

"I will definitely take that advice, I am going to see him now because well I just miss him," I say and laugh a bit.

"Young love is the most powerful, I remember sneaking out of my window at night to see Carl," she says and I laugh.

By the time we stop talking we are already up in the air. I start to work on my essay for psychology. I had to miss class today so I am getting a head start.

The flight attendant comes around and gives us cookies and takes our drink orders. I get water and Priscilla, my new friend next to me, gets tea. She looks over at my essay and smiles.

"I remember those days," she says and I nod.

"Lots of work little time," I say and she laughs.

"What's your major?" She asks.

"Psychology," I say and she smiles.

"What do you want to do with it?" She asks.

"I think work with kids," I say and she smiles.

"I was a kindergarten teacher," she says and I smile.

"Wow that's a hard job," I say and she nods.

"But so rewarding," she says and I smile.

"I learned more from a class of 20 four and five-year-olds than I did in my entire life," she says and I smile.

"Kids, Phoebe they are brutally honest and pieces of work. But they love you unconditionally," she says and I smile.

"Do you have any of your own?" I ask her. She nods smiling. She shows me her flip phone wallpaper.

"My oldest is Michael he has three kids of his own named Dylan, Tyler, and Georgia. My middle is Jeff he has two kids named Finley and Reed. My baby is Ruby she has four kids named Beckett, Hannah, Lucy, and Jake," she says and I smile.

"That is so sweet. Your grandkids are so cute," I say and she smiles.

"They are my lifeline," she says and I smile.

We talk more about her kids and life. She makes me feel so comforted. I am so glad she is here with me on this flight. I don't know what I would have done if I had to sit in silence the entire ride.

We land 5 hours later in New Jersey. It is pouring rain here. Perfect. I hug Priscilla goodbye and head off to find a cab. My bag is my carry on so I don't need to go through baggage claim.

For the first time ever I am alone. No one following me no one watching over me. It is quite crazy actually. I get a cab and tell her to take me to Princeton. She nods and heads off. I fidget nervously with my hands.

I try not to think of my parents because when I do I feel guilty. They deserve better than me. Maybe this was a selfish decision. Oh, my dad would be so mad if he found out I was here. Oh my gosh.

As soon as I really start to have a panic attack we are here. I pay her and get out of the cab. I hold my bag and walk up to Nathan's apartment building. I take a deep breath and walk up the steps walking in.

I get on an elevator after a student scams their badge to get up. I know Nathan is the 6th floor. As soon as I get up I realize I have no idea which one is his. Shit.

All of a sudden I hear talking. I look behind me and I see two people walking towards me. I step to the side and peek my head around. I see Nathan and a girl. Who the fuck is that? They both have coffees. Maybe they just got coffee and saw each other on the way up.

All of a sudden they stop at the same door and Nathan puts his key in. They both walk in and I feel my heart drop. Tears fill my eyes. I bought a plane ticket, snuck here, and lied to everyone just so I could see him with a girl.

Maybe they are just friends. Maybe they aren't. Coming here to have to find that out is so hard. I decide to sit on the stairwell and call Olivia. She answers pretty fast.

"Did you make it?" She asks.

"Yeah, I'm sorry I didn't call you sooner," I say.

"What's wrong? Have you been crying?" She asks.

"I walked into his apartment building and as I was going to find out which one was his he walked past me with another girl," I say.

"What were they doing?" She asks.

"I don't know they both had coffees and both went into his apartment," I say.

"Well Phoebe, that could mean anything. They could be studying in there for all we know," she says. She is right I guess.

"I know," I say.

"Well don't you trust him?" She asks.

"Of course I do," I say.

"Really?" She asks.

"We will have been dating for three years in November, why wouldn't I-" I cut myself off.

"You're right I'm being dramatic," I say.

"Phoebe, that boy loves you. And I know you love him. You went to him out of everyone after these past couple weeks of insecurity. Go love on that boy don't waste your time being skeptical," she says.

"I know you're right, thank you Liv," I say.

"I love you now go spend time with him," she says. We hang up and I stand up to go to knock on his door. As I walk to open the stairwell it opens. I am left being face to face with Nathan. He opens his mouth to say something and then closes it.

"Hi," I say. I had this whole speech planned, but seeing him made it all go away.

"Phoebe, what are you doing here?" He still hasn't moved. I really got him.

"I just needed to see you," I admit. He walks forward and takes me in his arms. As he holds me I start crying. This is exactly what I needed.

"Don't cry," he says.

"I'm sorry for just showing up I just having been having the hardest time at school and I just needed to see you," I say.

"Don't apologize, baby, I'm so happy you are here," he says. "Let's go to my room," he ushers me into the hallway and into his apartment.

I look around at the apartment. He has one roommate. They keep the place pretty clean. He has his books scattered on the table and the coffee he was holding. So he was studying.

We sit down on the couch and he looks at me. "So, what's happening?" He asks.

"I just got to school and it didn't feel right. We said goodbye and I just have been having a tough time. It's been so hard without you," I say and he frowns.

"I knew something was up. Baby I could have come to you, you didn't have to have move Sawyer and your dad bring the jet," he says moving me closer to him.

"Well that's the thing," I say and Nathan looks down.

"My parents… well, they don't really know I am here," I say. Nathan looks down at me.

"What do you mean they don't know you are here?" He asks.

"Don't be mad, but I kind of had Olivia buy my plane ticket and I took cabs to and from the airport. Sawyer thinks I'm locked in my apartment with the flu," I admit. Nathan closes his eyes and tilts his head back.

"Phoebe… this is one of the most reckless things you have ever done, I would have just come to you. If you get caught I won't see you for months," he says and I nod.

"Don't be mad," I say again. He takes a deep breath and holds me close.

"You are so lucky that I love you," he says and takes a deep breath.

"Where's your roommate?" I ask him.

"He's not here tonight. They had a frat formal at the pier," he says.

"I have good timing then," I smirk and cuddle to him. I start to doze off as he rubs my head. I haven't been sleeping well at all and traveling wore me out.

"Bee?" I hear and I look up. Nathan frowns as he looks down at me.

"Come into my room, let's get you to sleep," he says.

I walk into his room and smile. It is so him. He has a world map tapestry hung up behind his bed. It covers the entire wall. It is a bluish grey color. His bed sheets are navy blue and grey. He has the grey Vancouver throw pillow I bought him on his bed too.

"I love it in here," I say and crawl into the bed. I lay on my side and Nathan comes over.

"Let's get you some PJs," Nathan says.

"I'm fine," I say sinking into his bed.

"No come on," he says. I shake my head and he laughs coming over. He pulls my pants off leaving me in my panties.

"Here," he says and I take off my bra putting on one of his big shirts. He comes in the bed with me and holds me to his chest.

"Sleep, we will talk more in the morning," he says.

"I love you," I say.

"I love you more," he kisses my head holding me. I fall asleep in his arms.

_**OCTOBER **_

"Good morning, sleepyhead," Nathan kisses my head between each word.

"I made you some peanut butter banana toast," he says and puts the plate down as I sit up.

"Mmm thank you, good morning to you too," I smile. He kisses my neck as we hug.

I eat breakfast as I stare out his window. Princeton is a really cool campus. "So, can we talk?" Nathan asks. I nod my head and he looks at me.

"You said you got to school and didn't feel right, what do you mean by that?" He asks.

"I mean I just, I got there and my anxiety was at an all-time high. I didn't sleep well, and I was missing you and home a lot. Maisy and Andrew have started talking and Olivia and TJ are dating, it all just made me miss you," I say and he takes my hand as I put my plate down on his bedside table.

"Babe, why didn't you tell me this was going on I would have been there in a second. It's okay to miss home, Phoebe. After you got adjusted to being there for almost 4 months you were taken back to school and that's hard," he says.

"It just seemed like everyone else was doing so good and having so much fun and I was missing you," I say.

"Everyone seems to have it together on the outside, Bee," he says and he makes a fair point as usual.

"I know, Caroline and Teddy are dating now. She was talking to me about them and she seemed so happy. It just made me miss you so much, I don't know why this is so hard," I say.

"Nobody said it was easy. You need to start going easier on yourself, Bee. You always want to make yourself happy and content with life at all times and sometimes that isn't realistic," he says and I nod.

"You make very good points, Mr. Moore," I say.

"It's okay not to be okay, you need to learn that," he boos my nose and I smile. I do put a lot of pressure on myself.

"I'm sorry again for just showing up," I say. He rolls his eyes.

"You are welcome anytime. I'd just prefer next time you maybe ask your father," he says and I nod.

"Are you anxious about your dad or mom finding out?" He asks.

"Well not really. I guess my dad more so than my mom. I think my mom would be proud of me," I say and he laughs.

"I'm glad you are here," he says and I nod.

"You know you can call me anytime and be honest about what's going on right?" He asks and moves some hair out of my face.

"Yeah, I know. I just hate to call and dump all my problems on you. Besides I just wanted to see you," I say and he smiles.

"You are never dumping your problems on me. Ever. I am always here for you," he says and I lean in kissing him.

"I love you," I say.

"I love you more. Now, what do you wanna do today?" He asks I smile and look out the window.

"Well last time you didn't really get to give me a full tour, maybe we could do that," I say and he smiles kissing me.

"That sounds like a great idea? Do you want to shower?" He asks and I nod. He is being very gentle with me I can tell.

"Follow me," he says. I stand up and grab my clothes. His roommate is still not here. He is in his PJ pants with no shirt. I walk behind him and his back muscles and butt are so hot.

"Here you are," he says. And that is the second clue he is treating me like glass. Usually, he would get in the shower with me. This boy.

"Where are you going?" I ask as he starts to walk out. He turns and smiles at me.

"You sure?" He asks.

"I didn't fly five hours to get here and not have sex with you," I say and he laughs.

"We aim to please then," he says.

We both get in and have our way with each other. It's a pretty spacious shower. After we get out and both get ready for the day. We head out in the afternoon.

"Okay, you ready?" Nathan asks. I nod and we head out the door. We walk to the elevator and head down to the first floor.

We walk hand in hand as Nathan takes me on a tour of campus. The first stop is his favorite coffee shop. "What do you get here?" I ask him.

"Iced coffee with cream," he says and I smile.

We walk to the football stadium and I get to see the boys practicing. "This is so cool," I say and Nathan kisses my head. We walk out then head to the clock tower.

"This is the exact middle point of campus," Nathan says and I look up at it.

"That's pretty smart if you ever get lost you can just look for the tower," I say and he laughs.

"I'm not sure that's what they built it for, but yeah that is a good idea," he says and I laugh.

"I'm trying to think what else I could show you," he says.

"Where do you go out on the weekends?" I ask him. He takes my hand and we start walking. It's a short walk before we get to huge houses.

"This is fraternity row, these are all the frats on campus. We usually go to these two, sigma chi and Theta Chi," he says and I nod.

"Is this were you meet all the babes," I ask and he shakes his head.

"You my friend, are the only babe I need," he says.

"Oh, you flatter me," I say.

"Okay let's head back to my place for lunch, I'll make your Mac and cheese," he says.

"You read my mind," I say and he laughs. We walk back to the apartment and on the way, he shows me the basketball court. We can go all the way in, but I get to peer down at it.

"This is so cool," I smile clapping my hands.

"I'm glad you got to see it," he says and as he takes my hand.

"Thank you for showing me around campus," I say and he smiles leaning in and kissing me.

"Thank you for coming," he says against my lips. We walk out and head back to the apartment. When we get there my phone starts to ring. I grab it out of my bag and freeze. Shit.

"Who is it?" He asks.

"My dad," I say.

"That's fine just act natural," he says. Shit. Shit. Shit.

"Hello," I say.

"Hey Bubs, how are you?" He asks.

"I'm good, how are you?" I ask.

"Doing well, what are you up to?" He asks.

"Just hanging out in the apartment," I say.

"Oh fun, listen I have a question for you," he asks.

"Sure what's up?" I ask.

"So tomorrow I have a meeting with the dean about the internship program. I will be at campus at around 11 the meeting should end by 2, so I was wondering if I could pick you up for lunch?" He says. Shit. My flight lands at 12:30. I'll have to sprint back to the apartment. But I can't say no because he'll show up to the apartment to say hi.

"Sure that sounds great," I say.

"Perfect, I love you Bubs," he says.

"Love you too," I say and hang up.

"What's going on?" He asks.

"Well lucky for me he has a meeting at WSU tomorrow," I say.

"You're kidding," Nathan says.

"I'll be back in time to meet him for lunch, so it's fine," I say and he laughs.

"Just your luck," he says as he cooks and I nod laughing.

Nathan cooks me lunch and we eat it together on the tiny patio. He has such a good view of the campus. It truly is beautiful.

"I don't want to leave," I say and he smiles.

"We will see each other next month," he says and I nod.

"I know it's just hard," I say and he takes my hand rubbing my knuckles.

"We can do it and besides after next month we have all of Christmas break," he says and I nod.

"Then spring break and then school is basically over," I say and he smiles.

"You're right, my dear," he says and I smile.

"We can do this," I say.

"That we can," he says and kisses me hard.

—-

"Come on, get out of bed," I am wrapped up in Nathan's comforter.

"It's so comfy," I say.

"Well it won't be comfy when you miss your flight and your dad comes to pick you up and you aren't there," he says and I about jump out of bed.

"I'm up I'm up," I say. He laughs and smacks my butt as I walk to the bathroom. I get into my travel clothes and brush my teeth and do my hair.

"I made you breakfast," he says. I smile and dig into my toast and eggs.

"Thank you," I smile kissing him.

"Did you make me any?" I turn and see a guy our age walking out of his room. He is blonde and Nathan's height. Ava would find him so hot. She's into the blonde surfer types.

"In your dreams, Liam this is Phoebe, Phoebe this is Liam Garret, my roommate," he says. We shake hands.

"Nice to meet you, Phoebe. I've heard a lot about you," he smiles.

"Good things I hope," I say smiling. He laughs.

"Of course, this kid worships the ground you walk on," he says and I laugh.

"What time did you get home?" Nathan asks.

"Two-thirty, I was at Emily's," he says and Nathan's fist bumps him. Boys.

"I have to drop, this girl off at the airport can I borrow your car?" Nathan asks. Liam passes him the keys.

"It was nice meeting you," I say as Nathan takes my bag.

"You too, safe travels," Liam says as we head out.

"He is so nice," I say as we walk to the car.

"Yeah he is great," Nathan says and I smile. We walk out to a black BMW. Nathan opens the door for me and I slide in. As he starts driving his hand rests on my thigh.

"Thank you for taking me," I smile.

"Of course baby," he says.

"Are you feeling ready to go back?" He asks.

"Yes and no. Knowing I will see my dad makes it better," I say and he nods.

"You know I am always here," he says and I nod smiling.

We drive to the airport and Nathan carries my bag in. We walk up and get all my stuff situated. He walks me all the way to security and that is where he can't get through.

"So this is goodbye huh?" I ask and he smiles.

"I'm always here for you, Bee. Call me right when you land," he says and I smile.

"I will, I love you," I say and he wraps his arms around me. I hug him tightly as he kisses my head.

"I love you so much," he says and I kiss him.

"I don't want you to miss your flight," he says and I smile.

"I know, thank you for hosting me," I say.

"You are welcome anytime. I love you, my girl," I give him one more tight hug then walk into the security line. I look back and see him watching me. I blow him a kiss and he pretends to catch it.

I walk through security and head to my gate. I text Nathan and thank him again. He responds, of course, telling me not to thank him and that he loves me. That boy.

I get in line and board my flight. I sit in the middle of the plane and sit in a window seat. The flight fills and I watch people continue to walk by. No one ends up sitting next to me, so I have the row to myself.

The flight is a breeze. I sleep for majority of it. I didn't sleep a lot last night. I blush thinking about it. Nathan stays on my mind. The flight lands and I grab my bag. I shuffle out of the plane and hold my bag tightly to me.

I order an Uber and get in the car. He drives me the short distance to WSU. It is 2 on the dot when I get out of the Uber. He pulls away and I run upstairs to my room. As I am putting the key in the door to get into my door I hear my dad say my name.

"Bubs," he says as he hugs me.

"Are you Okay you seem out of breath?" He asks and I panic. Why am I out of breath?

"I just ran up the stairs," I say and he laughs.

"Oh Bubs, what have you been doing all weekend?" He asks. Shit, he obviously hasn't talked to Sawyer.

"I actually wasn't feeling well, so I stayed in," I say and he frowns. He holds his hand to my forehead.

"You don't feel warm," he says.

"Oh nothing like that just girl stuff," I say and that shuts him up quickly. Score.

"Well, what do you want for lunch?" He asks.

"You want to go to Soup Spoon?" I ask him.

"Sounds great, do you wanna go put that bag down?" He asks. It has all my stuff in it. I nod and walk in. Luckily no one is home, so I drop the bag in my room and head out.

"Okay, you ready?" He asks. I nod and we head out. There is nothing more I want to do than shower, but my dad is here and I need to take advantage of that. He is easing my sadness about leaving Nathan.

"How was the meeting?" I ask as we walk in the restaurant.

"It went well. The dean is a very nice man. I am very happy to be working with this university," he says and I smile.

"I'm glad it went so well, when do you pick the first students to intern?" I ask him.

"December then they start in the summer," he says.

"That's so exciting," I say and he nods. We order our food. I get tomato soup and grilled cheese. My dad gets the Italian wedding soup and salad.

"So you stayed in this weekend, but what were you up to last week?" My dad asks.

"Just going to chapter at the sorority house and class. We had a toga party which was fun," my dad gives me a look at the last part. I'm sure that isn't his cup of tea.

"Fun, how are classes this year?" He asks changing the topic from my partying habits.

"They are good. I am really enjoying psych this year. It is super cool," I say.

"And you are still leaning towards doing child psychology?" He asks and I nod.

"I really love working with kids, I think this is the way to go for me. Is that stupid?" I ask him.

"I don't think it's stupid at all, and I know that you are a very hard worker so I think you can achieve anything you want to do," he says and I smile.

"I'm very excited about it," I say and he smiles.

"That's my girl, how is Nathan doing this year?" I do feel guilty for lying, but he would kill me if he found out.

"He is great, getting ready for basketball season," I say and he smiles.

"We should try to go to one of his games if they every play in Washington," he says and I smile nodding.

"They play University of Washington, I don't know when though," I say and he smiles.

"We will have to go, that sounds like a lot of fun," my dad says and I smile. I love that he is so supportive of Nathan.

Our food gets delivered and we dig in. It is so freaking good. I would eat soup spoon every day of my life if I could. My dad is really enjoying his too which makes it all the better. We walk out after eating and start our walk back to my apartment.

"So what's in store for the next couple of weeks?" He asks.

"Well we are making our Halloween costumes then we have our sorority Halloween party," I say.

"What are you guys being?" My dad asks.

"Olivia, Maisy, and I are being the Powerpuff girls," I say and my dad laughs.

"You loved that show," he says and I nod smiling.

"That I did," I smile.

"Let me guess you are Bubbles," he says and I nod smiling.

"How'd you know?" I ask.

"That was your favorite when you were little," he says.

"I remember that," I say.

"You were so funny," he smiles and wraps an arm around me. We finish our walk back and he drops me off at my door.

"Don't be a stranger okay? And make sure to call your mom she was jealous I got to see you," he says and I smile.

"I will, I love you," I say.

"I love you most, Bubs," he says and we hug before he heads out. I go into the apartment and fall on the couch. What a week.

—

"Who's ready to make some costumes?" Maisy asks coming and in and dropping all the stuff she bought on the ground.

"Us apparently," I say making Olivia laugh.

"You two are lucky to have me, I got all the stuff for next week," she says and I laugh hugging her.

"This shouldn't be too hard. I got big T-shirt's and we just have to cut them and put a waistline on them so we don't look 500 pounds," she says and I shake my head.

"Maisy you weigh 120 on a good day," Olivia says.

"This isn't about me," she says and we laugh.

"Uh huh," Olivia says.

We all sit in a circle in our living room cutting and tying. I am just following Maisy because she seems to know what to do. Not too shocking.

There is a knock on our door and I grab it. I open it to find Andrew. I smile and give him a hug. He gives me a short pat on the back before going over to Maisy. Ouch. He gives her a kiss and I shut the door.

"What's up, Andrew?" Olivia asks.

"Just stopping in to see my girl," he says and I smile. They are so cute.

"You flatter me," Maisy says and I laugh.

Andrew watches as we make our costume. I go to the bathroom and try mine on. It fits perfectly. I come out and show Maisy and Olivia. Andrew is on his phone but look up.

"Hot damn, Grey," Olivia says.

"See I told you-you could do it," Maisy says and smacks my butt.

"Now help me," Olivia says. I hang mine up and switch back into my normal clothes before coming out and helping Olivia.

"Andrew, did you hear the new Avengers movie came out?" I ask. He says yeah.

"Did you still want to go see it together?" I ask him.

"I already have tickets to see it with Maisy, I'm sorry," he says and I force a smile.

"No you're fine," I say. We had plans to do it months ago, but I can't get mad I know what it's like to be in a relationship. Especially as new as theirs.

"I'll go see it with you," Olivia offers.

"You were just talking about how much you hate superhero movies," I say and she laughs.

"I just feel bad you got stood up," she says and I smile.

"I didn't stand her up," Andrew says.

"You kinda did," Maisy buts in. I love her so much. It's her boyfriend and she is defending me.

"Whatever," he rolls his eyes and I get back to helping Olivia.

Once we all finish we hang up our costumes. Maisy ordered pizza so we are all just going to eat here. Maisy and Andrew, who is being a dick, are sitting on the couch. I stay in my room. I hope Andrew doesn't start being weird like this because he is dating Maisy. He didn't even ask how New Jersey was.

I walk out when the pizza comes and grab a wine glass and a bottle of wine. Maisy got a really good bottle of red wine. I sit at the counter with everyone and eat pizza and drink my wine.

"Drinking on a Tuesday?" Andrew asks.

"It's just one glass," I say.

"That's how it starts," Andrew says and I give him a confused look.

"What's going on with you?" I ask him.

"Nothing, it's just off character for you to drink on a Monday night," he says and I shake my head. I finish the glass and put it in the sink.

"I'm going to turn in for the night," I glare at Andrew and give Maisy and Liv a hug before I head into my room.

I have no clue why he is being such a dick. Ever since he and Maisy have been official he has been pushing me away. This is the third time he has canceled on me for something.

Last week we were supposed to get dinner, he canceled then came to our house and he and Maisy hung out in her room. Then we were supposed to study for bio together and he failed to show up to that. I don't want to be mad at him because I know what it is like to be in a relationship, but he is one of my best friends and is pushing me away.

I lay on my bed and get my laptop out. I play a movie on my computer and watch it in my bed. I drown out the noise coming from Maisy, Liv, and the dickhead.

For the rest of the night, I hole up in my room. I watch movies and head to bed early. I have class tomorrow anyway.

—-

It is Halloween night! I have my hair in two high pigtails. I put on my dress then my Steve Madden platform shoes. If I had blonde hair I think I would look exactly like bubbles. I put on a little pink blush to make it more convincing.

I walk out and find my roommates, Regan, Kendra, Andrew, Cole, Ryan, and TJ in the kitchen pregaming. "There she is," Maisy says and wraps an arm around me. Andrew gives me an awkward side hug and I quickly move on the guys that I haven't seen in forever.

"Grey it has been a hot second," Cole one of Tjs friends says.

"It has been awhile. How are you?" I ask as I pour myself a vodka lemonade.

"I'm great, just living the life, you look great," he says and I laugh.

"So do you, 3 hole punch Jim," I say looking at his costume. He is Jim from the office when he dressed up as a 3 hole punch.

"You're an office fan?" He asks and I nod smiling.

"Of course, it's the best," I say and he smiles.

"Grey, I like you more every time I meet you," He says and I smile looking down and finishing my drink.

I look up to find Andrew staring at me. He is dressed as Alan from the hangover. He isn't Cole's biggest fan let me tell you. Well, I'm not Andrew's biggest fan either.

"Everyone lets do shots," Maisy says and brings out the tequila. I do three tequila shots with Coke and 1 with Olivia. I am very drunk by the time we walk out.

We go to Fiji and walk in. Loud music is playing and I go to the bar and get another drink. They have pledges be the bartenders. The drinks are usually very strong and very bad, good thing I'm already drunk.

I sip my drink and go over to Caroline. She is Sandy from Greece. She is killing it too. "Grey, how are you?" She asks giving me a huge hug.

"I am amazing. Very drunk and very amazing. How are you?"

"Also very drunk. Missing your brother tonight," she says and I laugh.

"You'll see him for sibs weekend," I say and she nods.

"I know, but you have dibs on him then," she says drinking her drink.

"Long distance is hard," I say and she nods.

"It's so hard, why is it so hard?" she asks and I shrug.

"Good question. But tequila always helps let's go do shots," I say and she laughs. She takes my hand and we run over to the bar.

We end up doing one too many tequila shots and are both just hammered. We FaceTime Teddy in the bathroom. "Caroline?" He asks.

"Yeah yeah it's me, Theodore Raymond," she says and I turn the camera to me. "And me you forgot me," I laugh.

"Oh lord, where are you two up to?" He asks.

"It's Halloween, look how hot your sister looks," Caroline says and he shakes his head.

"Did you two drink a bottle of tequila?" He asks.

"Close to it, we miss you," I say.

"I miss you guys too, I'll be there in a week or so," he says and I smile.

"I know and I am staying at the hotel with you," Caroline says and I plug my ears. Ew.

"Okay I'm leaving," I say and Teddy says to be careful and text him when I am home or else he is calling Sawyer. I roll my eyes and head out of the bathroom.

I walk straight into Cole. "Oh my gosh I am so sorry," I say.

"No Grey, don't worry about it," he smiles and puts an arm around me. I move away from him and he laughs.

"I don't bite," he says.

"I know it's just I have a boyfriend," I say.

"And I have a girlfriend," he says and I feel uncomfortable.

"Really?" I ask.

"Yeah she goes to TCU her name is Amanda," he says and I blush.

"Oh I'm sorry I didn't mean to-" he cuts me off.

"don't worry about it. You are loyal I like it," he says. I laugh and shrug.

"It's hard doing long distance," I say.

"It is, it's always at night when it's the hardest," he says and I stumble a bit. He catches me when I fall.

"I know right," I say. It's always nice talking to people who get it.

"So where does your boyfriend go?" He asks.

"Princeton," I say.

"Wow Ivy League?" He asks and I nod.

"He plays basketball and is going pre-med," I say.

"Wow sounds like quite the catch," the sarcasm goes straight over my head.

"So, What about Amanda?" I ask.

"Oh she's um she is at TCU for anthropology," he says and I nod. The alcohol is really hitting me.

"Cool, I actually should um go home," I say. I look at my clock and it is 2:30 in the morning.

"Let me walk you," he says.

"Oh no, it's fine," I say.

"Why not?" He asks. My drunk brain is slowly thinking of every excuse plausible.

"I told you I have a girlfriend, Phoebe," he says and I sigh.

"Okay," I say. I stumble a little bit and his hand finds my arm. I'm so drunk. Those tequila shots really do it for me.

We walk outside and I feel the tequila coming up. "Shit can I have a second?" I ask.

"Are you okay?" He asks. I nod and lean against the stair railing. All of a sudden I try to take a step down and end up falling. I feel Cole try to grab me, but I fall flat anyway.

"Jesus, Phoebe are you okay?" My dress has ridden up and Cole puts his hand way to high up on my thigh. He starts rubbing it and I shove him away. He comes back and starts doing it again.

"Stop it," I say.

"Phoebe?" I hear. I see Andrew and he runs over to me. What is he doing here? I am mad at him.

"What the hell is happening?" He says and Cole jumps off me.

"She fell man, I was trying to help her," Cole says.

"I got it from here, you can go I'll get her home," Andrew says. Why is he trying to be helpful now?

"Why are you trying to help me now?" I slur out.

"Phoebe, stop," he says and alcohol makes me emotional.

"No you stop," I say as tears stream down my face.

"She obviously doesn't want you, bro," Cole says.

"God Damnit, Phoebe he is trying to get with you," Andrew snaps. I am so drunk I don't know who to believe.

"He has a girlfriend she goes to TCU her name is Amanda," I say and push Andrew away.

"What the? Did you tell her that? For fuck's sake his sister's name is Amanda and she goes to TCU," he says and I am so confused.

"Fuck you, Andrew," Cole says. Wait he lied. Then come the tears.

"I don't want either of you walking me home," I sob and stand up doing my best to storm away. I hear yelling from behind me. I get out my phone and hit Nathan's name.

"Bee?" I hear a sleepy voice.

"Nate, Nate, Nathan," I say as I sob.

"Baby, what's wrong? Have you been drinking?" He asks.

"I want you to come to Vancouver," I say. All of a sudden there is a hand on my shoulder. It's Andrew.

"Please just stop," I say.

"Phoebe, who is with you? Is someone trying to touch you? Should I call the police?" He asks. Andrew must have heard him.

"Moore, don't worry I have her. She is very very drunk. This douche lied to her and said he had a long distance relationship too. She was crushed to find out he was lying and was just trying to walk her home to do lord knows what. I am getting her home," I can't hear what Nathan says. Andrew passes me back the phone.

"Baby, I want you to listen to me okay?" He asks.

"Okay," I sniffle.

"I need you to listen to Andrew okay? Let him get you home and then we'll talk in the morning," he says. Oh no.

"Please don't be mad at me," I cry.

"Shhhh baby I am not mad at all, I am happy Andrew, has you. I hope you had so much fun. I love you so much," he says. My drunk mind doesn't realize how gentle he is being because I am sensitive when drunk.

"I love you too," I slur out.

"Now make sure you listen to Andrew," he says and I say I will.

By the time we hang up, we are at my apartment. We take the elevator up and I give Andrew my key. He lets us in and I run to the bathroom. I shut the door and start throwing up in the toilet.

It is all the tequila making an appearance again. Andrew makes his way in and holds my hair. "Let it out, do you have a ponytail holder?" He asks and I hold up my wrist that has one on it.

I feel him doing my hair. He puts it in a high bun. Why does he know how to do this? I almost laugh when then leads me to throw up more. I sit back against the glass shower when I am done.

Andrew passes me water and once. I am done I notice blood on my floor in the bathroom. Andrew notices it too.

"Oh for fuck's sake," Andrew says.

"I'm going to check you over okay?" He says and doesn't do anything til I say okay.

"Phoebe, your leg," he says and I look and see it dripping blood on the back of my thigh.

"I fell," I say and Andrew grabs a wet towel holding it on it. I have bandaids in a mason jar on my counter. Nathan grabs a couple and starts putting them on my leg.

"I'm sorry," I say.

"No I'm sorry," he says and I look up.

"I've been a horrible friend, Phoebe. I have been so focused on Maisy I didn't even check to see how you were," he admits.

"It really hurt my feelings when you canceled on me," I say and tears start streaming down my face. I try to wipe them quickly and he frowns.

"I know and I will never be able to apologize enough, my friend. How about dinner and the Avengers movies on Friday," he suggests and I nod smiling through the tears.

"Good, now give me a hug and then let's get you into bed," he says. I stand up and wrap my arms around him. He smells like his cologne. He helps stay me up and I crawl in my bed.

What a night.

_**NOVEMBER **_

It's siblings weekend! Teddy is on his way to the hotel. I am so excited. For this weekend, we rented out the bowling alley. It's siblings versus sigmas. I can't wait to beat Ted at bowling.

I am at the apartment right now. He already got checked into the hotel and is on his way here. Olivia is home for this weekend because her parents just got a new dog.

There is a knock on the door and I run to it. "Teddy," I smile and give him the biggest hug.

"Oh my gosh, Bubs you look great," he says and I smile.

"Thank you, so do you," I say as he comes in.

"Well show me your place," he says.

"Okay, so this is the kitchen. I cleaned it for you, so you're welcome. This is the living room and where we spend the majority of our time," I say and Ted smiles.

"Then this is my room and my bathroom," I say and he laughs at my wall plaque that says 'welcome to the shit show'

"Pretty on point for me," I say and he laughs.

"You are too funny," he says and I smile.

"So what's on par for tonight?" He asks.

"Bowling," I smile and I can tell he is excited.

"So I can crush you," he says.

"Shut up," I laugh.

"Is everyone going?" He asks.

"If by everyone you mean Caroline then yes," I say and he laughs.

"Shut up," he playfully shoves me. He sits on a barstool on the island and I stand across from him.

"How is that going?" I ask leaning back against the countertop and crossing my arms.

"With Caroline? It's amazing, she makes me so happy. I didn't think it would work long distance, but it is great," he says and I smile.

"I'm happy to hear that," I say.

"Speaking of, how is Nathan?" He asks.

"Good, he has his first game next month which is pretty exciting," I say and Ted smiles.

"You picked a good one," he says and I nod.

"You know they play Harvard in February," he says and I look up.

"Wait really?" I ask. Ted nods.

"Are you going to go?" I ask.

"Well duh, it's in Boston," he says and I smile.

"Maybe I could fly over," I say and he smiles.

"I would love that, you could come out with me, maybe Caroline could come," he says.

"Oh yeah that would be awesome," I say.

"I think it would too, we will have to talk to the boss man," Ted says referring to our dad.

"If I ask him he'll say yes," I say and Teddy rolls his eyes knowing it's true.

"Whatever. So what time does this shindig start?" He asks.

"You did not just say shindig," I say and he laughs.

"At 7 so we should head out in 20," I say and he smiles.

"How crazy is it that you graduate this year?" I ask him.

"With my bachelors, I still need to go to law school," he says and I nod.

"I know, but that's still a big thing," I say and he nods.

"I know, it is crazy," he says.

"April 21st I have it on my calendar we are all flying over to see you," I say and he smiles.

"I'm excited, you haven't been to Harvard since what your junior year?" He says and I nod.

"Yeah, long time no see," I say.

"Well it'll be good this time," he says and I nod.

"So can I make our drinks?" I ask him

"Phoebe Grey, I am astonished," he says and I laugh.

"Don't act like you don't know what goes on in college," I laugh. "What can I get you we have bud lights, stuff for margaritas, and vodka," I say.

"Why do you have beer?" He asks.

"Mostly for the house guests, but we all occasionally will drink beer," I say. "But what do you want?" I ask him.

"Umm I'll take a beer, I don't trust you to make me a margarita," he says and I shake my head.

"Your loss," I say and pass him a beer. I make myself a vodka cranberry.

We pregame together before heading out. We go to the bowling alley and go in. I am so excited. I see Maisy and she comes over to me smiling.

"Hey Ted, remember Maisy?" I ask him.

"Of course, hey Maisy," he says as they hug. We talk to them for a bit before getting set up at our lane. Caroline is with us and so is Maisy and her sister.

We get set up at our lane and from nowhere Caroline comes over and about jumps in Teddy's arms. It is so sweet to see. She looks damn good too. She is in a white bodysuit and black jeans with her Gucci belt on.

"Hey baby," He says and I smile at him being so sweet to her.

"I missed you," she says in his arms. I go over and sign us all up letting them reunite.

I am first. I bowl and get a spare. Suck it, Ted. He is up next. He smirks at me and goes. He is left with one pin standing. He goes and puts his arm around Caroline brooding.

Maisy and her sister go, then Caroline. I get a strike the next go around. Ted high fives me and then gets a strike too. "Don't get too cocky, little," he says and I roll my eyes. Whatever.

We keep playing until it is our last bowl. I get a strike and Theodore stands up. He gets a strike too. Oh, buddy. The scores come out and he beats me by 1. One fucking point.

"Ha," he says and I kick him in the shin playfully.

"Whatever," I roll my eyes.

"Don't be jealous," he smirks.

"Trust me I'm not," I say and he laughs.

We bid goodbye for the night and plan to meet up in the morning. He and Caroline are going to his hotel room. Gross. I head back to my apartment. It was such a good night and so fun to see Theodore.

—-

"Time's up pencils down," my professor says. I look across the room to Kendra who winks at me. That was my final test before Thanksgiving break. I was so lucky because I got all of them down and still have four days on campus to chill before break.

I walk out and Kendra heads back to her apartment. The fresh fall air feels amazing on my face. It is the best. I head back to my apartment and open a window. I get out an ice tea and sit on the counter.

"Someone's in a good mood, how'd your last test go?" Maisy asks.

"Great, actually. I am so happy to be done," I say and she smiles.

"Lucky bitch I have one tomorrow," she says.

"Which speaking of I should be studying for. Enjoy the freedom, Grey. I am jealous," she says as she heads into her room.

"Good luck," I call after her. I sip my tea and look out the window. It is so nice. The sun is shining and I feel great. I should go out tonight. I pick up my phone to call Andrew and as I am dialing my number Sawyer calls me. That's odd.

"Hello?" I say.

"Phoebe, we have to head up to Seattle. I need you to pack a bag. I will explain in the car, but we need to go now okay?" I hear. My heart drops. Teddy? My parents?

"Is everyone okay?" I hop off the counter and rush into my room.

"We'll talk in the car I'll be in the front in five minutes," he says before hanging up. And just like that, my mood is crushed. I have no clue what is going on.

I quickly pack a bag only throwing necessities in there. I pop my head in Maisy's room and explain what just happened. "Oh Phoebe, call us if you need anything okay?" She asks and I nod. She gives me a hug goodbye.

I run down the stairs and see Sawyer. I quickly get in the car and beg to know what is going on. Sawyer turns and looks pale. I'm about to burst into tears.

"It's your grandpa, Ray. He had what they think is a heart attack. He is in the hospital and they are assessing him. He is stable right now. Your dad is going to call you, but he didn't want you to be told that over the phone," Sawyer says. And just like that my day is ruined. My world feels like it stops. I've never lost a grandparent. I think of all the times grandpa ray took me fishing or to the park. His laugh and his smile.

My phone starts to ring as Sawyer let's go if my hand. "Bubs?" I hear my dad's voice and it makes me cry harder Sawyer starts driving.

"Is he okay?" I ask.

"Shh don't cry baby, he is so strong. The doctors are working with him now baby," my dad says and the fact that he didn't give me a yes or no answer worries me.

"He has to be okay," I cry. My mom. Oh, my mom. Is she okay?

"Where is mom?" I ask.

"She is with him, honey. Don't worry baby you will be here soon," my dad says. I'm so scared.

"I need you to keep breathing and remember how strong he is," My dad says.

"Okay," I say weakly.

"Just keep breathing," he says.

We hang up and Sawyer takes my hand. "Are you okay?" Sawyer asks. I shake my head no and bury my face in my hands.

"Phoebe, he is so strong. He is going to make it through this," he says. How can he be so sure?

The ride feels like hours. Nathan calls me twice and I just can't bring myself to respond. When he calls me a third time I turn my phone off. My mascara is smeared all down my face. Sawyer hands me a tissue and I wipe my face off.

We pull up to the hospital and Sawyer drops me off in the front. I run up the steps of the hospital. This feels like a bad dream. I crash into my dad and he holds me tightly. He is just who I needed to see.

"Take a deep breath, take a deep breath," he says as he holds my face. I do and I can see his eyes are brimmed with tears. That makes me cry even harder.

"Come on baby, you can come see him," my dad says. I nod and he wraps me under his arm. Paparazzi are on the streets and I hear Sawyer yell before going inside.

I get checked in and get a visitors badge. My dad escorts me to the room and as I put my hand on the handle my dad stops me.

"Bubs before you go in, you need to know there are a lot of tubes and wires hooked up to him. They are all helping him breathe and get better. He is still the same grandpa ray," my dad says and I nod. I take a deep breath and walk in. My world stops. The scene in front of me.

Grandpa Ray has a tube down his throat. He is hooked up to countless IVs and has wires attached to him everywhere. He doesn't look like himself. He looks smaller and paler. My mom is sitting with her back facing me. She is holding his hand tightly.

"Phoebe," she stands as she sees me. I can tell she has been crying. She wipes her eyes and I can see she is trying to be strong. I give her a huge hug. She rubs my back as I cry into her shoulder. I sit down next to her and look at grandpa ray.

"Can he hear me?" I ask her.

"I haven't stopped talking to him since I got her," she says. I nod and take a deep breath.

"Hi Grandpa Ray, it's Phoebe. Your lovebug. We need you to stay strong for us but take your time. When you are ready to wake up we will all be here," I say and hold his hand. My mom sobs next to me and my dad is next to her holding her.

I start to cry as I watch my mom cry. I have never seen her like this. She is always so poised and put together. I hold my mom's hand and grandpa's hand. I pray that he can get better.

Hours pass and I sit with him. My dad has begged me to go home but I can't. I can't leave mom and grandpa. It is so hard. I ate a little oatmeal and some apple slices. My dad has his arm around me right now.

All of a sudden I look up to see Teddy coming in. He comes in and looks at grandpa. My mom gives him the biggest hug. He holds her as she cries. Their relationship really does warm my heart.

"Hi Bubs," Ted says and comes over hugging me. I cry into his shoulder and he rubs my back.

"Son," my dad says as he hugs Ted. Ted sits down and holds grandpa's hand. This is heartbreaking.

"Do they know what happened?" Ted asks.

"They ordered an EKG and the results should be in by tomorrow," my mom says. Ted nods and looks at Grandpa.

"Is Grandma Carla coming?" I ask. I haven't seen Grandma Carla in over a year. She calls a lot though. She got married when I was a freshman in high school to a new man. Mom says she is a hopeless romantic.

"We are waiting to hear what the results are honey," my mom says and I nod. My dad looks at his watch than to me.

"Bubs, let's get you home. It is 2 in the morning. I promise I will get you here by 9 tomorrow morning," my dad says. I cross my arms and look at my mom. She had a pull-out bed brought in for her. I know Ted will stay with her.

"Honey go, we don't have anywhere for you to sleep and the last thing we need is you getting sick. Grandpa knows you were here. If anything happens throughout the night we will wake you up. Grandpa wouldn't want you missing sleep over him. You know that" she says and I nod. I fight the tears that spill over my face.

"I love you, Grandpa. I will be here tomorrow bright and early. I love you so much," I say. I give him a kiss on the head and stand up. I hug my mom tightly and then Ted.

My dad puts his hand on my back and walks me out. As I walk out, I realize just how tired I was. I get into the car with my dad and Taylor driving. We both sit in the back. I sit silently and stare out the window.

I think about my mom and how much pain she must be in. I can't even imagine. I picture my dad being the one in the hospital bed. Tears start to roll down my face.

"Don't cry, Bubs. He'll be okay," my dad says.

"I just feel so bad for mom," I say and my dad holds me to his chest.

"You are so caring and so special. Mom is tough, and even in her times where she doesn't feel strong, she has you and me and Ted. Even Aunt Kate and my parents and siblings. She is the daughter of Ray Steele though which makes her very tough," he says and I nod.

"I know, but it's so scary," I say and he nods. He rubs my back as I lay my head on his chest.

"We are home baby," he says and I get out. I walk into my room and change into pajamas. There is a knock on my door and I say come in.

"You tired?" My dad asks me. I nod sleepily.

"Okay, let's get you to bed," he says. I lay in my bed and he comes over. I lay my head on his chest.

"Does Nathan know?" My dad asks. I am assuming Nathan texted him. I shake my head no.

"Any reason for that?" My dad asks and I shrug.

"I don't want him to feel like he has to come," I say. My dad smiles and kisses my head.

"You are so altruistic, Phoebe," he says.

I close my eyes and pray for Grandpa Ray. I end up falling asleep very quickly on my dad's shoulder. I stay asleep for the night.

—-

"Grandpa it's me, Phoebe," I say holding his hand. It's been almost a week and he is still the same. They said he needs open heart surgery. That scared the living daylights out of me.

"Nathan is coming home today for Thanksgiving break. Our three year anniversary is the day after Thanksgiving. It's crazy that you have only met him once. I will have to bring him in to see you," I say talking to him.

The door opens from behind me and my mom and Dad walks in. "Phoebe, you've been here for 8 hours, you need to get home," my mom says. I have been spending every day here. I come when I wake up and leave before bed.

"I'm fine, Mom," I say. She sighs and comes over to where I am sitting and bends down to eye level with me.

"Baby, Grandpa knows you are here and loves spending time with you. But you need to go home and eat and sleep. You are going to get sick if you keep this up and that is the last thing Grandpa would want," she says and puts her hand on mine.

"I know, I was just reading him a book. It's about the guy who caught the world's largest shark," I say.

"And you can finish it tomorrow, plus the nurses need to get in here and give him his medicine," she says and I nod. I stand up and give Grandpa Ray a kiss on the cheek.

I walk out with my parents and we get in the car. My dad is driving and my mom is in the front. "When is his heart surgery scheduled for?" I ask my mom.

"Well they scheduled it for the second week in December, so in 3 weeks, that gives him time to recover from what happened last week," she says and I nod.

"I'll be home then. I get done with my exams on that Monday," I say and my mom smiles.

When we pull in my driveway I see a familiar black Jeep. "Nathan is home?" My dad asks.

"Yeah, would you guys mind dropping me off here. Then parking in the garage," my dad stops the car and I get out.

I walk over to the front porch and see Nathan sitting on the steps. When he sees me he about jumps up and comes to me. " I'm sorry, I've been so distant," I say and he cups my face in his hands.

"Don't apologize, are you okay?" He asks. I shake my head no and he wraps me in his arms.

"Don't cry," he says rubbing my back.

It starts raining and Nathan starts to escort me inside. I shrug my jacket off and he hangs it up. "Let's go get you something warm," he says.

We go into the Kitchen and my parents are whispering back and forth. When they see us my mom smiles. "Hi Nathan," she says and comes over hugging him. My dad shakes his hand.

"Hi Mr. and Mrs. Grey, I am so sorry to hear about your father Mrs. Grey," he says and she smiles.

"Thank you, Nathan. We are going to turn in. Remember Phoebe tomorrow is Thanksgiving, and everyone is coming here," My mom says. I nod and my dad comes over and kisses my head.

"Take care of her," my dad says and pats Nathan's back.

I look down at my hands as my parents walk away leaving Nathan and me in the kitchen. This is the first time I've seen Nathan since early October.

"what's going on in that head of yours?" Nathan asks me. I shrug and look down at my hands. I am just so bummed about Grandpa Ray.

"He has to be okay," I say. Nathan comes over and turns me to him.

"He will be baby, you have to stay strong," Nathan says and I nod.

"I can only be so strong," I say and put my head in my hands. He wraps his arms around me.

"I'm here for you, I will always be here," Nathan says.

"Let's go to your room and get some sleep," he says.

"You're staying?" I ask and he nods.

"Of course I am, come on," he says. We walk up the stairs together and go into my room. I sit on my bed and Nathan comes and lays me down. I rest my head on his chest and he rubs his hands through my hair.

"I'm scared," I admit. Nathan looks down at me and brushes the hair out of my face.

"Talk to me," he says.

"If Grandpa Ray doesn't make it, what will my mom do? What will I do? He has to wake up," I say and start crying. Nathan pulls me so I am on his chest.

"Don't think like that okay? He is going to pull through this," Nathan says.

"I'm so scared," I say.

"You don't have to be," he says and holds me. We sit in silence as he rubs my head and I end up falling asleep on his chest.

When I wake up in the morning Nathan is laying next to me. Today is Thanksgiving. I really don't feel like getting ready or doing anything. I just want to be with grandpa ray. I sit up and rub my eyes. I look over at Nathan who is sleeping peacefully.

I get out of bed and go into my bathroom. I need to shower. I turn on the water and get in. As I stand there letting the water pour over me, I start to think about different memories with Grandpa Ray.

When he took my dad and me on the boat to go fishing and I cried because I couldn't catch a fish, so he let me reel in his. When we stayed at his house and we played hide and go seek in his huge backyard. When he would cuddle and watch my little pony with me.

Suddenly the shower door opens and Nathan is standing there. The cold air hits my body and I cover myself. "Bee, you've been in there for an hour. Come on out," he says. I quickly shut the water off and cover myself with a towel.

"Sorry," I say and wrap my hair up. I start putting on clothes. I have to dress up a bit since it's Thanksgiving.

"Are you feeling any better after some sleep and showering?" Nathan asks. I nod and finish putting on my shoes. I have on a big comfy sweater jeans and my lace-up flats.

"I just have to do my hair," I say as I start blow drying it. I finish it up and curl it as Nathan watches. I put on mascara and lipgloss.

"I'm ready," I say.

We head downstairs. Nathan has to leave to go to his family's Thanksgiving. I help my mom cook. We both stay pretty quiet.

After a couple of hours, we have finished setting up the house. Dinner is on the table and people start arriving. When Ava comes in she wraps me in a big hug.

"I missed you," she says and I smile.

"I missed you too, Ava," I say.

"I'm sorry to hear about Ray," she says.

"It's okay, he is strong," I repeat what everyone has told me. I then hug Mia and Ethan and their kids. Grandma Grace And Grandpa Carrick come too.

Everyone is standing around talking and all I can do is think about Grandpa Ray. He should be here right now. Not alone in the hospital. No one is with him and it's Thanksgiving.

I look around at everyone and sigh. I walk out and grab my keys and jacket. I walk out of the house and get into my car. No one will even notice I'm gone. As I go to pull out my car lights illuminate my dad. Who is standing in front of the gate?

I sigh and roll down my window. "Phoebe, what are you doing?" He asks.

"Going to see Grandpa," I sigh. My dad frowns and opens the car door.

"Phoebe, it's Thanksgiving everyone is here," he says.

"Exactly everyone is here and Grandpa is alone. It's Thanksgiving, it's not fair," I say and tears roll out down my face.

"Hey hey hey, don't cry, oh my girl," he says and takes me in his arms. He smells like my dad and it's so comforting.

"I can't stay here," I cry. "He is alone and doesn't deserve to be," I say. My dad looks around and is obviously conflicted. He sighs and looks at me.

"Then let's go," he says and I am shocked. He gets in the passenger seat and buckled himself.

I drive out and head towards the hospital. It is quiet and my dad holds my hand. When we get to the hospital we sign in. We go into grandpa Ray's room.

"Happy Thanksgiving, Grandpa," I say to him and kiss his cheek.

"Everyone is at our house and thinking about you. We are all missing your voice and laugh. When you are ready to wake up we are all here," I say. My dad kisses my head and holds my hand.

"You are so caring, Phoebe," my dad says.

I just want him to wake up.

—

Today is Nathan and my three year anniversary. Unfortunately, Ray is not awake yet. His vitals are getting better so they think he'll wake up in the next couple of days. Right now I have just finished getting ready then Nathan is picking me up.

I am going to try to put on a brave and happy face today. Today is such a special day and I need to perk up. I walk downstairs and I see Nathan waiting in the kitchen with flowers.

"Happy 3 years," he says and I smile. I give him a kiss and thank him for the flowers.

"These are beautiful," I say and start to put them in water.

"So what is the plan for today?" I ask leaning over the counter smiling at him.

"Well first we are going on a drive to somewhere I love," he says and I smile.

"Okay, let me just get my stuff," I say and grab my bag with my phone and his presence in it.

We get in the car and drive. I have no idea where we are going until we pull up in front of the dock. He got my dad's boat for the day. I am so excited.

"You got the boat?" I ask and clap my hands as he pulls out a picnic basket and another bag.

"Is this okay?" He asks nervously. I go over and kiss him deeply.

"I love it so much," I say and he smiles. We get onto the boat and head onto the back where the seating is. He has the table set up for us and sets the picnic basket down.

"So," Nathan says. "We have subs, fruit salad, chips, and homemade cookies," Nathan says. I smile and my stomach rumbles.

"Nathan, I don't deserve any of this," I say. I am speechless that he did this for me.

"Baby you deserve the world," he says. I shake my head. I don't deserve him.

"I'm really sorry for how I have been this past week. You did nothing to deserve my less than appealing behavior. I am just really worried about my grandpa and I don't mean to take it out on you at all," I say and Nathan looks at me. He takes both my hands.

"Baby how many times do I have to tell you, you are allowed to be upset and worried. You don't have to put on this happy and brave face around me. We are too far into this relationship for that bullshit," he says and kisses my knuckles. This boy.

"Thank you for being so understanding to me. I don't deserve it," I say.

"Yes, you do. You deserve the world," Nathan says and I blush.

Nathan takes my hands in his. "You are so beautiful," he says. "And so strong, and caring," he says and I blush.

"That blush is so adorable," he says and I look down.

"Three years huh?" He says and I nod.

"It's crazy," I say.

"Tell me your favorite memory of us," he says and I sit back. That's a tough question.

"Jeez, when you surprised me for my birthday this year, or our first anniversary," I say and he smiles.

"Those are big ones," he says.

"Well, what about you?" I ask him.

"September 18th, our junior year of high school," he says. I have no clue what happened then. Not even an idea.

"The first day we met," he says. Oh my gosh, I am so dumb. We met in late September.

"How do you remember the exact day?" I ask him.

"That's the day I met the love of my life," he says and I am left speechless. I open my mouth to say something and close it.

"I'm the love of your life?" I ask raising my eyebrows.

"Who else would be?" He asks and I smile looking down.

We clean up our mess and sit on the deck on the couch. He has both his arms wrapped tightly around me. This is the most relaxed I have been in weeks.

Nathan strokes my hair and we lay there. I start falling asleep then all of a sudden Sawyer is in front of us. "Phoebe," he says waking me up from my dream like state.

"Yeah?" I ask.

"I'm sorry kids the boat is going back, Phoebe it's Ray," Sawyer says. Nathan grabs my hand holding it and my heart sinks.

"Is he okay?" I ask.

"I'm not sure exactly what is happening. I didn't get details Taylor said we need to go back and go straight to the hospital," Sawyer says.

"Oh my god," I say and tears well in my eyes.

"Come here," Nathan says and holds me to his chest. I start to sob.

"Baby, it could be good we don't know what's going on," Nathan says.

"I don't- I can't- I," I can't even form words. The thought of Grandpa Ray passing kills me.

"Shhhh we don't know what's going on yet, don't assume the worst," Nathan says holding me. He rocks me back and forth until we are at the dock.

We quickly run to the car and get in. I am silent the entire drive. Nathan keeps talking to me and telling me everything will be okay. He whispers in my ear and holds my hand.

When we get to the hospital I feel sick. I am holding Nathan's hand as we head back. I knock on the door and my dad opens it. My world stops for a second.

"Hi Lovebug," Grandpa Ray says.

_**DECEMBER **_

"Phoebe, just get through your exams then you will be home, Grandpa Ray already told you, he doesn't want you missing them," my mom says. My mom and dad are standing over my bed trying to make me go back to school.

"What if something happens? I won't be just 5 minutes away," I say.

"Phoebe, your grandfather has one of the best cardiac teams in the country working with him right now. You need to go to finish your exams. After you take your last one next week you can come home," my dad says.

"I don't wanna leave," I sigh.

"Phoebe, everyone has left. Nathan left, Ava left, Teddy left today. It is time to go, baby, you need to take your exams," My mom says. I know she is right, but I really don't wanna leave.

"You guys have to promise me you'll keep me updated," I sigh.

"We will, of course, Bubs," my dad says.

"It's only one week, then you can come back," my mom says and I nod.

"Okay, then let's go," I sigh. I grab my bag and head downstairs.

"Goodbye my sweet pea," my mom says kissing my head.

"Bye Mom, I love you," I say.

"Bye Bubs, I love you the most," my dad says hugging me.

After the long goodbyes, I am in the car with Sawyer. We start heading towards WSU and I start studying. "How are you holding up?" Sawyer asks.

"I'm fine, I guess. Just nervous about leaving my Grandpa," I say.

"You shouldn't be kid. You know who your dad is and frankly who your grandpa is. Those two won't stop fighting for his health until there is nothing left," Sawyer says and I nod.

"Fair point," I say and he smiles back at me.

"I'm always here for you too. I know you have Nathan and the boy at school, but remember who sang princess songs with you while you danced in your car seat," he says and I smile. I always remember our jam sessions in the car.

"I know, you'll always have the most special memories," I say and he smiles.

"Now get back to studying so we can get you home," Sawyer says. I laugh and start reading again.

The ride goes by pretty quickly. I am reading and writing for most of it. I am studying hard for these exams. I need to do well on them so I can get out of here and go home.

When I walk inside Andrew and Olivia are sitting there. Andrew is the first to walk up and wrap me in his arms. "How're doing?" He asks me and rubs my back.

"Getting there," I say and he holds me in his arms.

"I believe in you, Grey," he says and I smile. Olivia then gives me a tight hug.

"I missed you," she says and I smile.

"I miss you guys too where's-" I get cut off by Maisy barreling into me and hugging me. I smile and hug her.

"You're home, I thought you'd never be back, I missed you so much," she says and I laugh.

"I missed you too," I smile.

"So do you wanna go out tonight?" Maisy asks. Olivia and Andrew both cut in.

"No," they both say at the same time. I smile and laugh.

"I'm okay Mase. I think I'm just going to lay low and study," I say and she nods.

"Okay, well we will all be here if you need us," Olivia says and I nod.

"Thank you guys," I smile giving them all one more hug.

I head into my room and sit down. It feels weird to be back to my room here. I get out all my school supplies and start studying. I have my first exam Monday so I have two days to study.

After two hours straight I head out to my kitchen. I open the fridge and see leftover pizza. I open the box and grab myself a slice putting it on a plate. I warm it up in the microwave as I get myself a glass of water.

I see Olivia is gone. I knew she went to TJs to spend the night. Maisy is here and by the looks of it so is Andrew. Once my pizza is done warming up, I sit at the counter and force myself to eat it. I didn't eat lunch or dinner today so I need it.

I hear laughing from Maisy's room. Before I hear more I put my plate in the dishwasher and head back into my room. I check my phone and see I have a missed call from Nathan.

I call him back and he picks up pretty quick. "Hey baby," he says and I smile at his voice.

"Hi," I say.

"How are you doing?" He asks.

"I'm okay, just studying for exams," I say.

"Did you get to school okay?" He asks.

"Yes, I studied for the whole ride so it went pretty quick. How was basketball?" I ask him.

"A breeze as usual," I know he is being sarcastic so I laugh.

"I'm sure, why'd you call?" I ask.

"Well to make sure you got to school safe and to ask what day you head home," he says.

"I leave Friday. Ray's surgery is on Monday," I say. I plan to be at the hospital the entire weekend before.

"Shit," he says.

"What?" I ask.

"I have an exam Monday it's my last one," he says. My heart drops. I really wanted him to be there for support.

"It's okay, don't worry about it," I say.

"I'll try and find a way to be there," he says and I know that means it's a slim chance he will.

"Really, it's okay," I say.

"We will figure it out. I will let you get back to studying. I love you so much," he says.

"I love you too," I say and we hang up.

I am quite bummed about Nathan, to say the least. It's okay though I'll have my parents. I know my mom is going to need my dad. It's a six-hour procedure from start to finish.

I know I will get through it. It is going to be hard on everyone. I just pray for Grandpa Ray and his health. I get back to studying for the night.

—-

I walk out of my last exam and take a deep breath of the winter air. It feels so good on my face. My exams were so stressful. I have been having stomach cramps due to all my stress.

Finally, I am now done. I walk back to the apartment where I have all my stuff packed for winter break. I am so ready to see Grandpa Ray. I head in and grab my suitcase. I go downstairs and get into Sawyer's car.

"You ready?" He asks.

"More than ready," I say and he smiles and starts driving. I take advantage of this time to sleep. I haven't been doing a lot of that recently.

When I wake up we are pulling onto the hospital grounds. "You good?" Sawyer asks as he looks back. I nod and he smiles.

I get out and walk into the hospital. I first see my dad who takes me in his arms. "Hi Bubs," he says. "I missed you so much," he says and I nod.

"I know, I missed you too," I say.

"You feel way too thin, have you been eating?" He asks pulling me back and looking at me.

"Yeah, I have just been so stressed," I say. That's the other thing I have lost at least 10 pounds from when Grandpa came in the hospital till now and it's catching up with me.

"I am going to get you some food and when I come back I want all of the food on the plate gone," he says and I know he is serious.

"Sir yes sir," I smile and he laughs shaking his head.

"Someone is waiting to see you, I'll be back with food," he says motioning to grandpa's room.

I walk into my grandpa's hospital room and he gets the biggest smile on his face when he sees me. "There she is. They told me, you'd be home an hour ago," he says as we hug.

"I know, my exam got delayed an hour," I say and he smiles.

"Well, how was it?" He asks me.

"My exam? It was good, I studied a lot for it," I say and he smiles.

"You make me so proud," he says and I smile.

"Where is my mom?" I ask him looking around his room. It's like a small garden.

"She went to a meeting she'll be back in a couple of hours," he says and I nod.

My dad walks in with grilled cheese and tomato soup. "Operation get Phoebe to eat," my dad says. My grandpa shoots his head over at me.

"Have you not been eating?" He asks. "I knew you looked thinner. Phoebe, not eating is not an option you look at least 8 pounds lighter," he says. "Not in a good way. You are already so petite, sweetheart," he says and I sigh.

"I have, he is just being dramatic," I say and my dad narrows his eyes at me. I take a bite of my grilled cheese and start eating. My grandpa clears his throat.

"Phoebe, I want to talk to you," he says.

"What's up?" I ask him.

"As you know, I am having my surgery on Monday. I want to talk to you about if I, Well if I don't make it," my stomach drops.

"No, don't talk that way," I say.

"Phoebe, I need to know that you will be okay. If I don't make it-" I cut him off.

"Grandpa, you are going to make it," I say and push my food away from me. Tears well in my eyes and he takes his hand.

"I love you so much, my Phoebe girl. If I don't make it I don't want you to push away your family and friends. You do that you know. Anytime something's bothering you, you hole up and hide. You can't stop living your life because of me," grandpa says and I nod.

"You're going to make it," I say.

"Phoebe, I'm not saying I am not going to, but you have already lost what 8 pounds. You can't stop taking care of yourself," he says.

"I won't," I say and wipe the tears that fall. I give him a huge hug and he rubs my back.

"I love you, Phoebe girl," he says and I tell him I love him.

The next days before his surgery are spent with a lot of hugs and hand holding. I've been leaving the hospital late and getting there early. The day his surgery comes around is the scariest day of my life.

"Okay, we have to take you back now Ray," the nurse comes in.

"Well let me give my people hugs," he says. I go first and give him the biggest hug. He holds me in his chest and kisses my head.

"Remember what I said, Phoebe Girl. I love you and am so proud of the person you are," he says and I nod.

"I love you so much," I say and he kisses my head. I walk out of the room. My dad gives him a hug and I wipe the tears that fall. I don't want him to see me crying.

I watch as my mom and he talk. My mom is hugging him. They told us before he agreed to have the surgery that is it is a long and dangerous procedure. Any open heart surgery is.

My dad tells Teddy to take me to the surgery waiting room. I nod and walk down. I am sure he doesn't want us seeing my mom upset. My heart is beating out of my chest as Ted walks me to the room. We sit down in a corner. The chairs aren't comfortable.

The thought of sitting here for 6 hours while he gets operated on makes me sick. Nathan can't be here today because he has an exam. Teddy rubs my back and I wipe my eyes.

"He'll be okay, right?" I ask Ted.

"I think he will be, Bubs," he says and I nod. Teddy kisses my head and wraps an arm around me.

Mom and Dad walk in a short while after. My dad and mom sit across from us. "You guys okay?" My mom asks us. We both nod and she takes our hands. I can tell she has been crying.

"He'll make it through," she says and we nod.

I really could just throw up. I am exhausted and so worried about him. I pray that he makes it through this. I am staring at the tv screen that they have up playing the news.

After two hours, I am restless. Literally. The doctors assistant has been out once and told us he has no news.

"I'm going to get Mom a tea, doesn't anyone want anything?" My dad asks.

"Water please," Teddy says.

"Phoebe?" my dad asks and I shake my head no.

"I'm okay," I say looking down at my hands.

"I'm going to get you a tea," he says and I nod.

As we sit there in silence, I hear footsteps. Assuming it's my dad I don't look up. When I don't recognize the shoes I look up. Oh my god.

"Nathan," I say standing up. I about melt to the floor like jello when he wraps me in his arms. I start sobbing.

"Come over here, let's talk," he says. He guides me away from my mom and teddy. This is the last thing they need to see.

"I thought. I thought. I thought you were taking an exam," I say crying. He wipes my eyes with his thumbs.

"I took it early, I wouldn't let you go through this alone," he says and I hug him tightly.

"You came all the way here," I say and he nods. I feel like jello.

He sits me down and gives Ted a hug. Then he goes over to my mom who thanks him for being here.

Nathan wraps an arm around me and I lean against him. His support right now is everything. He kisses my head and I close my eyes.

"Nathan, Thank you for coming," my dad says and hands me a tea. I thank him quietly. I take a sip and hold it letting it warm my hands.

My dad wraps an arm around my mom and we all sit quietly. Nathan scratches my head soothingly as we wait. Another 2 hours pass and I have only gotten up to go to the bathroom.

"Steele family," the doctor walks out and my mom and dad shoot up walking over.

I stand anxiously waiting. It has only been four hours, there should be another two. I watch as my mom nods as he talks. They both shake his hand and walk back over.

"It is going to take longer than expected," my dad says as my mom sits.

"What why?" I ask.

"Because they have to take things a little slower, Bubs. He is doing great in surgery," my dad says and I look at my mom. She forces a smile at me.

"Phoebe and Ted, you need to eat," my mom says.

"I'm not hungry," Ted and I both say at the same time.

"Guys, you need to eat. Grandpa won't be out for at least another 3 hours," my dad says sternly.

"Go to the cafeteria and get some food," my mom says. Teddy shakes his head and storms off to the cafe. I, on the other hand, do not. I refuse to leave. What if something happens while I'm gone?

"Bee, come on," Nathan says standing up.

"Phoebe, go," my dad says.

"I'm not hungry," I say again.

"You need to try and eat, don't make me carry you," my dad says. I know he will too.

"Phoebe, please. This is already hard enough on all of us," my mom pleads and I start to feel bad. I sigh standing up.

"Call me right away if anything happens," I say and they promise they will. Nathan wraps an arm around me as we walk to the cafeteria.

I look around at all the food. I have no clue what I want to eat right now. They have all different options. I decide on some french fries and chicken fingers.

Ted got a coffee and a croissant and left to sit outside. It's freezing out there. Nathan and I sit at a table near a window. I put my food in front of me and pick up a French fry.

"Can you tell me how you really are?" He asks me.

"I'm fine," I say.

"That's not what I meant by how you really are," he says and I shrug.

"I'm tired and worried," I say and Nathan nods taking my hands.

"He's going to make it through this. How about after you eat we can go sit on a couch and you can sleep with your head on my lap for a bit," Nathan suggests. I shrug and eat a fry. Nathan watches me.

"You have to sleep, Bee. You are going to get sick," he says and I sigh.

"I feel fine. Anyway, how did you get here?" I ask him.

"I flew on a plane. I came straight here," he says and I nod.

"I don't deserve you. Thank you for coming," I say and he shakes his head.

"I don't deserve you, Bee. Now eat up," he says and I eat a chicken finger.

After two chicken fingers and some fries, I can't eat anymore. Nathan eats some too before we throw it away. We head back to the waiting room and sit down on a couch near my parents.

I rest my head on Nathan's shoulder and he moves me so I am laying with my head on his lap. He runs his hands through my hair and it is so soothing. I close my eyes and end up drifting off.

When I wake up, I am startled. I jump up and look around. "Bee, relax," Nathan says.

"Is he okay?" I ask. My dad stands up and squats down in front of me. I look to see my mom resting on her chair.

"He got out of surgery 5 minutes ago. They are taking him to post-op. We can't see him till tomorrow morning because they have to closely monitor him," my dad says.

"So we are staying overnight?" I ask.

"Your mother and I are, Nathan is going to take you back to our house with Ted," he says. My heart drops.

"No I'm not leaving," I say.

"Phoebe, yes you are. This is not an option. You need to sleep. You have barely gotten any since you have been home," he says and I frown.

"I don't wanna leave," I say.

"I know you don't, Bubs. But we won't get to see him till the morning. He is sleeping off the medicine they gave him," he says.

"Where are you and mom going to sleep?" I ask.

"In his hospital room," my dad says rubbing his hair. I can tell he is getting frustrated. I know he is exhausted and stressed so I don't take it personally.

"Why can't we just go in there?" I ask.

"Phoebe, I am telling you, you are going home. Your mother and I are very tired especially your mother. She does not need you being defiant on top of this," he says and I fight the urge to fight back.

"Fine, I'm saying goodbye to mom," I say and go over to her.

"He is just tired, baby," my mom says.

"I know, will you promise to call if anything happens?" I ask and she nods hugging me.

"Go get some sleep," she says.

"I will, is it okay if Nathan sleeps over?" I ask her. She sighs and looks over at Ted and my dad talking.

"I didn't say anything, but yes that's fine," she says. "He can come over to sleep," she says putting emphasis on the word sleep.

"Okay. I love you," I say hugging her.

"I love you too, now go," She says and stands up. Nathan takes my hand as I go over to him.

"Say goodbye to your dad then let's head out," he says and I nod. I say goodbye to my dad and I know he feels bad because he hugs me and apologizes. After we head out. I didn't realize how late it was until we started walking to the car.

When we get in Nathan's car I buckle up and sigh. He takes my hand and starts driving. When we get to my house I still haven't said one word. We walk inside and head into my room. I put on one of his shirts and panties.

I sit on my bed and Nathan comes over. He smiles down at me. "I love you, Bee," he says.

"Stay with me," I say and grab his hand when he starts to walk away.

"Are you sure?" He asks.

"Please don't leave me, I need you," I admit.

"I'm not leaving," he says "don't worry I'm not leaving," he says and slips off his shirt. God, he is so hot.

He climbs in bed with me and wraps an arm protectively around my waist pulling me to him. "I love you so much," he says against my neck.

"Thank you for being here," I say.

"I would be here anytime for you," he says and I turn to face him. I run my hands through his hair. I lean in kissing him and he returns the gesture. It is slow and passionate.

"Sleep now," he says and holds me. I fall asleep easily in his arms.

—

"Slow down you speed demon," I say and my grandpa laughs. We are taking a lap around the hospital floor. They have just recently allowed him to take one lap at a time. He has to sit down and rest after because he gets so worn out.

"Phoebe girl, you kill me," he says. I have his IV pole and he is walking along.

"Ray, how you feeling today?" I hear an older man's voice.

"As good as I can, Phil. When are they letting you bust out of here?" He asks and the old guy laughs.

"As soon as I can walk a lap without wheezing," he chuckles.

"You'll be there soon," my grandpa smiles and we keep walking.

"Hi Ray," I hear.

"Linda, you look lovely today," Ray says. I smile only Grandpa Ray would come in here and make a bunch of friends.

"Ah here we are," he says as he gets back to his room and sits down. My mom is there editing a manuscript.

"How was it, Dad?" She asks.

"Good as it can be, Phoebe will you pass me the water?" He asks and I pass him his ice water.

"So I heard you all are coming here for Christmas. I'll have to put on a new hospital gown," he says. He is wearing his flannel pajama pants and the green hospital gown over top. My mom and I both laugh.

"We rented out the room on the floor and everyone is coming here. Gail and Taylor will be bringing over all the food and drinks," my mom smiles.

"You guys make too much of a fuss for me," he says and I shake my head.

"It's because we love you," I smile.

"Uh huh, speaking of love where is this boyfriend of yours?" He asks. I blush and look down at my pants.

"At home right now I think," I say and he smiles.

"When is he going to come over here?" He asks. My mom looks up and I smile.

"Uhm you want him to?" I ask.

"Of course, I have to remind him what I'll do if he ever hurts you," he says and I laugh.

"I mean I can call him and see if he wants to stop by," I say.

"I have the house phone here if you need," he says and holds up the phone by his bed. I laugh because he is truly so cute. He hasn't gotten used to cell phones yet.

"I can use my phone," I smile. I stand up and go in the hallway.

"Hey, baby what's up?" He asks as he answers.

"Not much, but is there any chance you want to come stop by and meet my grandpa?" I ask him.

"Of course, do you mean right now?" He asks.

"Well if that works for you," I say.

"I'm on my way already," he says and I smile.

"Thank you," I say. We bid each other goodbye and I head back into my grandpa's room.

"He's coming by now," I say and my mom and grandpa look at each other.

"What?" I ask.

"Nothing your mom was just telling me about how much this boy adores you," he says and I laugh.

"He does and I adore him," I say.

After about 20 minutes there is a knock at the door and Nathan walks in with flowers. "Hi sir, I'm Nathan Moore," he says and shakes his hand.

"I remember we met briefly on Phoebe's birthday two years ago," he says and Nathan nods.

"That we did, I brought you some flowers is it okay if I put them here?" Nathan asks.

"Of course thank you, son," grandpa says.

"Now tell me how is Princeton treating you?" He asks Nathan.

"It's great sir. I am on the pre-med track and playing basketball. Both of those keep me very busy," he says and my grandpa smiles.

"Sounds like it does. So you get your doctorate, where do you wanna work?" My grandpa asks him.

"I am thinking about pediatrics specifically general surgery or orthopedics," he says and my grandpa smiles.

"Kids huh? They are pretty great," Nathan nods.

"I have 23 cousins and I am the fourth oldest so it's just kind of in my blood," he says and I smile.

"23? Your grandparents must have trouble remembering who's who," he says and we all laugh.

"Nathan helps phoebe babysit sometimes," my mom says and he looks over smiling.

"The Cruz kids?" He asks and we nod.

"I've heard great things about them," my grandpa says and Nathan and I start telling them stories.

After almost an hour of talking a nurse comes in and says he needs to go get his scans. He shakes Nathan's hand and kisses my head.

"Do you want to come over for a bit?" Nathan Asks. I feel bad we have barely hung out this whole break. I have been at the hospital almost the entire time.

"Yes she does, Phoebe girl go. You have been here far too much," my grandpa says on his way out. I smile as the nurse laughs and wheels him out.

"Uhm sure, we can do that," I say.

"Only if you want," Nathan says. I look over to my mom and she nods telling me to go.

"Okay, yes umm I didn't drive," I say.

"I did," he says. I smile and take his hand I hug my mom goodbye and say I'll be back later.

Nathan and I walk out to his car. "Thank you for doing that," I say.

"Of course, Ray is a great man," Nathan says.

"He is, Thank you for being understanding. I know we haven't hung out a lot," I say and he shakes his head taking my face in his hands.

"You don't ever need to worry about that, your grandpa had surgery, I don't expect you to hang out with me," he says and I lean in kissing him.

He holds my face as we begin to make out. I undo my seatbelt and lean in closer to him. His hands run through my hair. The only sound being our kissing and the rain tapping on the car.

His hand moves over to my thigh and I part my legs a bit and his hand moves up farther. We haven't had sex since October. We didn't even on our anniversary because it got cut short.

He pulls back and looks at me. "I love you girl," he says and I look down blushing.

He pulls out and starts to drive us to his house. My panties are wet, so I cross my legs. I take a deep breath and close my eyes.

We get to Nathan's house and no one is home. Figures. We walk inside and I shrug off my rain jacket. We walk into the living room and I fall back on the couch. Nathan comes and sits next to me.

"Ray looks a lot better," he says and I smile.

"He is starting to take longer walks and get better. They say he will probably be home by the end of next month," I smile.

"That's amazing baby, are you ready to go back to school?" He asks. I look down and shake my head. I've been in a family bubble here.

"Not really," I admit.

"I think it will be good for you," he says and I shrug.

"Maybe," I say. He comes over and kisses my cheek. I turn my head and start to kiss him.

The kiss turns passionate and he holds the back of my head. I need more from him. I move so I am straddling him on the couch and his hands find my back.

He starts kissing my neck and I move my head so he has easier access. My hands find the waistband of his pants and start rubbing him over top of his pants. I think he is as ready as I am.

"Baby, do you want this?" He asks.

"Please, I need you," I say. After the words leave my mouth he picks me up holding me under my thighs and carries me to his room. He puts me on the bed and shuts the door locking it. He slides his shirt off and comes back over to me.

"Can I take these off?" He asks talking about my pants. I nod and unbutton them before he slides them off. The wet stain on my cherry colored panties is evident. Nathan smirks and I blush the color of a stop sign.

He comes back up kissing me. His hands find my bra and he pushes my boobs out so they are perked up. My shirt is off within a second and he is attacking my chest. My hands run through his hair.

His fingers make his way down to my panties and they slip inside the waistband. I main out as two fingers make their way inside me. "Shit," I moan out. He starts pumping them in out as we make out.

He crawls between my legs and throws my panties off. Before they hit the floor he is on top of me. "You ready?" He asks and I nod.

He lines himself up with me and slowly enters me. It has been so long that it fills me up more then I remember. I close my eyes as he keeps filling me. He waits for a second and brushed the hair out of my face.

"You okay?" He grunts out and I nod.

"Good girl," he says before he pulls back and starts to move. I am fuller than I can imagine.

I bite my lip as thrusts in and out. It feels so good, but I am barely able to stand it. "Feel it, baby," he says and I close my eyes.

"Ahh Nathan," I cry out as we keep having sex.

"Nathan, I'm going to," he just starts going faster and finally I finish. I grip his bicep and moan out. He is watching me intently and it makes me blush.

Nathan finishes right after me and I am out of breath. I lay on my side and Nathan brushes the hair out of my face. "You amaze me," He says and I laugh.

I pull the sheets over us so we are naked but covered. "You are so beautiful like this," he says and his fingers brush against my shoulder.

"What sweaty and gross?" I ask and he shakes his head laughing.

"No flushed and out of breath," he says and I smirk.

"Thank you for being here for me," I say and he kisses me.

"I'll be here till the end of time," he says as he holds me in his arms.

—-

Today is Christmas Day. We are preparing to go to the hospital to be with my grandpa. My dad rented out one of the nice rooms in the hospital and we are doing Christmas dinner there.

I am in my red off the shoulder jumpsuit. I am wearing the pearl pendant necklace Nathan got for me. It is so simple and so beautiful. He stopped by last night to give it to me.

I got my dad a photo album of us. It started out from the first picture of him and me from when I was born and ended with a picture from Thanksgiving this year. All between are the pictures of us together.

It was fun creating that book because it was so easy for me to see how much I adore my dad. He was holding me in almost every picture. And I look so content in all of them.

It was funny there was one picture of me when I was 7 months old. I have a teething ring in my mouth. My dad told me the story and it is so sweet.

(Flashback Christian's POV)

I have been gone for two days. Ana and my 2-year-old son and 7-month-old daughter are at home. Phoebe has been teething and Teddy is in his terrible twos.

I call Ana and she picks up the phone. In the back, I hear my daughter crying and Teddy yelling. "Hello?" She asks.

"Hi baby," I say. I hear my son demanding to see me. He thinks we are on FaceTime.

"Oh hi Christian, hold on Teddy you can take a turn in a second," my wife says in her stern mom voice. I can imagine her trying to soothe phoebe while Teddy wraps around her leg.

"How have they been?" I ask.

"We've seen better days," I hear a loud crash. Phoebe starts crying even louder. My poor Ana.

"Theodore Grey, what did I say about touching the chairs?" My wife says. Teddy has an obsession with making the chairs fall. My wife blames me for showing him an episode of Tom and Jerry where the cat runs under the table and knocks all the chairs over. We rewatched that scene almost 50 times.

"Shhh Phoebe," my wife tries to calm her.

"I wish I could be there, baby," I say.

"You have work to do Mr. Grey. Besides, we have some baby Orajel on the way," she says and I frown picturing my baby girl chewing on her fingers in pain.

"I'll be home as soon as I can. I'm boarding the jet now," I say.

"I can't wait to see you," she says.

"I know me too," I say.

"Say bye bye to dada, Teddy," I hear Ana say.

"Daddy I woves you dis much," I can picture my little man stretching his arms out wide.

"I love you more, Teddy Bear," I say and he giggles.

We hang up and I board the jet. It is a long 8-hour flight, I am thinking about my kids for most of it. My poor little girl in pain and my funny little man missing me.

I get out and get in the back of Taylor's car. It is 1 in the morning and we are all exhausted. I am very excited to hit the hay. I am hoping the kids went down easy for Ana.

When I get home and walk in I grab a water and head upstairs. When I walk into Teddy's room I find him asleep on his belly in his crib. We had his race car jammies on. I smile at how sweet he is.

I could stare at him sleeping all day. His cheek is squished against the mattress making him look so cute. I can't help but take some photos of him. I turn his sound machine back to his favorite sound of the ocean waves and sneak out.

When I head into the nursery my heart drops to find an empty crib in the beautifully done nursery. It has pink walls and a monogrammed Phoebe above her crib. I check in the crib once more and run to my room.

I hear my daughter before I see her. I walk into my room and see my wife standing in her robe rocking phoebe side to side trying to soothe her. My poor girl has her hand and a teething ring in her mouth.

"Christian," she says and rushes to me. I kiss her deeply and hug her tightly. I give her another kiss and rub Phoebe's back.

"She's been crying since midnight," my wife says and I nod. I take her in my arms and she stares up at me for a second before crying again.

"You go to bed. You've had her for the past two days. I'll get her down," I say. I start rocking her side to side.

"No I feel bad you have traveled all day," Ana says. This woman. My wife. My muse. Amazes me.

"Ana no, go to bed. You've had two kids for two days straight go get some sleep," I say. She kisses me then kisses our whimpering baby girl.

I walk out and head downstairs into the kitchen. On the counter is baby orajel. I position Phoebe so she is sitting in my lap with her facing me. I put some gel on my fingers and run it over her gums. I feel her little teeth trying to pop out.

My poor girl. I then switch her teething rings out so she has one from the freezer that is cold. I give her some gripe water. A trick my mom told me about that worked with Mia when she was teething.

I did call my mom on the way home at 1 in the morning. Teddy never had this much pain. We just gave him a teething ring and he was happy as a clam. I take my girl up to her room. She has quieted down a bit but is still whimpering.

"Shhh shh," I say as I lay her on her changing table. I change her wet diaper and put on a fresh one. I decide to leave her in just a diaper and wrap her in her cozy blanket. It is a floral blanket that Phoebe loves to lay on. It is so soft.

I sit down in her glider chair. She holds the cold teething ring in her mouth and starts to calm down. All that crying really wore her out. I put her against my chest and wrap the blanket around us. I rub her back and turn on her sound machine. Her little hand creeps up and grabs my shirt to hold.

Oh, this girl. She is fighting sleep as she stares at me. "Sleep baby girl," I say. A big smile forms on her face as she hears my voice.

I stroke her cheek with my finger and she opens her mouth and smiles. My entire heart is melted. She yawns as I continue to rub her back. Soon I hear her breathing even out and look down to see my girl sleeping peacefully.

I keep her on my chest and relax. This is where I am the happiest. I let her stay like that for almost an hour before Ana comes in. She smiles at the sight in front of her and takes a picture of Phoebe and me.

I take the teething ring out of her hand and set it down. I put her in her floral PJs and she doesn't even stir. I lay her in her crib and put my arms around Ana as we stare at her. The only sounds being her breathing and her sound machine.

We sneak out of the room and head to bed. Phoebe will be up early for sure so we go to bed immediately for some sleep.

(end flashback)

My dad has always had this way of soothing me. I wish I could have seen him with me when I was a baby. He is going to be the best grandpa.

He said that is his favorite Christmas gift he has ever gotten. That melted my heart. I got my mom a necklace with Ted's and my initials engraved in the back. And I got Teddy a plane ticket to Miami from New Jersey to visit Caroline for spring break. He was very happy about that.

I got from Nathan a plane ticket to come visit him for my birthday. Which was so sweet. My dad and mom got me a summer trip with Nathan and Ava and Tyler to go to the California trip. I am so excited about that. Teddy, well he got me a bottle of vodka and my dad about had a stroke. Ted's 21 now and supplies me with alcohol.

I am so excited to spend Christmas with my family. It is going to be one of the best nights this winter break. I can feel it.


	4. Chapter 4

Chapter 4

_**(Y'all I am so sorry it has been so long. To be honest, I wrote this entire story before my vacation two weeks ago and it got deleted. I didn't have any time to write on vacation, so I had to redo the entire thing when I got back. I am so sorry! I did not leave you all in the dust and plan on finishing this story! Leave some reviews!)**_

_**JANUARY **_

It's new year's eve and I just finished getting ready. This year the theme of the party is just black tie. I just put my dress on and I am heading downstairs. This year the Cruz kids are coming and Nathan's family and Caroline and Teddy. A lot of my friends will be there I'm so excited.

"Hey baby," my mom says. She looks absolutely stunning. She is in a long sleeve beige sparkly gown. She has her hair in an updo.

"You look so beautiful," I say in awe of her.

"So do you sweet girl," she says and runs her fingers over my dress to smooth it. My dress is a deep red dress. It is tight and has an open back. It is more mature than what my dad would like I'm sure, but I'm nineteen.

My dad and Nathan walk into the room and both their eyes pop out when they look at me and my mom. I smile and look down as Nathan comes over and kisses my head.

"Hi Bee, you look good enough to eat," he says making me blush and whispering the last part.

"Hi," I say weakly.

"You ready for tonight?" He asks and I nod. He looks ravishing in his black tux.

"I am, the Cruz kids should be here any second they are coming early," I say. Drew is about to turn two. It is insane. He is the cutest almost two year old. It seems like just yesterday I was changing his newborn diapers.

"Bubs, come here," my dad says. I smile to Nathan and walk over.

"Get with your mom I want some pictures of the two of you," he says and I smile. I stand with my mom and he takes pictures on his phone. It's so funny watching him do it.

"Okay now you two," my mom says. My dad wraps an arm around me and I smile.

When Teddy and Caroline come downstairs I am blown away by how beautiful she looks. She is in a deep blue off the shoulder dress. Her hair is in long curls like mine.

After Ted comes down we take a bunch more pictures together. I get some with Nathan that I end up posting on my Instagram. Maisy is the first to comment "damn girl" of course.

After lots of pictures, we head out to the tent. Guests are starting to arrive. I am talking with Mr. Grate a man who works for my mom with Nathan when I feel someone pull on my dress. I look down to see none the other but Spencer Cruz. I haven't seen them in a couple of days because of Christmas so she is all smiles.

"Hi Spence, you look so pretty," I say. She is in a grey dress that has a sparkly top and a tool skirt.

"Bee Bee I need to tell you something," she says. I smile to Mr. Grate.

"It was great talking to the two of you, good luck in school," he says and shakes both of our hands.

"What's up Spence?" I ask her. She motions her hand to come here and I know she wants us to bend down to her level. Unfortunately this dress does not let me do this.

"Spence, I can't bend down girlfriend," I say and she frowns. Nathan touches my back and bends down for me.

"What's up?" He asks her.

"Mommy, says I need to weave Natin and Bee Bee awone tonight because it's their night too," she says and pouts. I look to Nathan and smile. I'm sure Mr. And Mrs. Cruz had a talk with them that we aren't here to play with them.

"You don't have to leave us alone, Spence. Sometimes Nathan and I will have to talk to the adults though," I say and she nods.

"Okay, da boys are playing with Nolan and Elijah and William," I say and I know that's my cousins friends. They are probably in the kid section of the tent. Spencer is a little shy for that.

"Oh really, that's fun, well can we get you something to drink?" Nathan asks.

"Mmmm do they haves chocolate milk?" She asks.

"I don't think so tonight, Bud," Nathan says and I smile.

"Okays orange drink," she says and I know that's fruit punch to her.

I get her a fruit punch and we sit down at a table. Ava and Tyler come over and give us both hugs. Ava looks amazing in her sparkly gown. It is a neutral tone and very sparkly, very Ava.

"Ava, Tyler, this is Spencer Cruz," I say. "Spencer this is my cousin and her friend, Tyler," I say and she puts down her fruit punch staring at them. Ava has never been one to like kids so she smiles at Spencer.

"Hi, my names Spenca Cwuz," she says and I can see Ava and Tyler melt. "I like yous dwess," Spence says to Ava.

"Thank you, I love your dress too. You look so cute," she says to Spencer.

"Thanks you, my mommy picked out dis dwess it for me," she says and takes her fruit punch in both hands taking a sip.

"So when do you guys go back?" Ava asks as I brush Spencer's hair out of her face.

"Next Wednesday," I say.

"Next Friday," Nathan says.

"We both go back Thursday," Ava says and we nod.

"So I heard that you are going to Princeton for your birthday," Ava says and I nod smiling looking to Nathan. That was a surprise from my parents.

"I am, he has a game on my birthday so I am going to watch then we are going to dinner," I say and Nathan nods. Spencer is being so good just sitting here.

"That is so fun. When are you letting me come to Michigan?" Ava asks.

"You still haven't been?" Nathan asks. Tyler eyes Nathan as Ava eyes Tyler.

"There hasn't been a good time. You can come whenever," Tyler says and I roll my eyes.

"Well how fuc- flipping generous of you," I eyed her as she almost swears in front of Spencer.

"Careful little ears," I say and she flips me off behind Spencer's head. I laugh and look down at Spencer.

"There they are," I hear my Aunt Mia's voice.

"Aunt Mia," I smile giving her a hug. I haven't seen her since I got back. They were with Ethan's family for Christmas.

"Hi sweet girl," she says hugging me and Ava. She greets Tyler and Nathan and says hi to Spencer.

"My son is playing with your brothers," she tells Spencer.

"They're nuts," Spencer says and makes all of us laugh.

"How are you guys, how is school?" Mia asks.

"It's great, California is a dream," Ava says and I nod.

"It's amazing, much more challenging this year, but it's great," I say and she smiles.

"That's awesome girls. I am so proud. We have to get dinner before you guys go," she says and we nod.

"Of course," I say. She gets called off and we all stand up.

"Tyler and I are going to get drinks, and to talk to his family. Save us a seat at dinner," Ava says and we nod.

"There she is, Spencer you can't walk away from mommy and daddy like that," I hear Mrs. Cruz voice.

"I was with Bee Bee and Natin," Spencer says and Mrs. Cruz shakes her head.

"You can't leave the kids area, we talked about this Bee isn't watching you tonight," Mrs. Cruz says and Spencer frowns.

"But she said I cans," mrs. Cruz looks at her. I tell Mrs. Cruz she can sit with us during the fireworks.

"Spencer, dinner is starting soon, you can sit with Bee Bee during the fireworks," mrs. Cruz says. She pouts and tells us she'll see us later.

Nathan laughs and puts his hand on my back. We see his parents and Berkeley and walk over. "Phoebe, you look stunning," Mrs. Moore says.

"Oh thank you so much, so do you," I say.

"Hi Berk," I smile hugging her.

"You look gorgeous," she says. She does too, she is in an emerald gown long dress. It's beautiful.

"Thank you, so do you," I say and she smiles.

We talk to Nathan's family for awhile and then dinner is called. Nathan and I sit with my family. We are across from Ava and Tyler. I am next to Teddy.

"Everyone looks great tonight," my mom says and I smile.

"Phoebe, red is your color," my grandma says.

"Oh thank you so much," I say and she smiles.

"This is amazing," I smile as I eat the French onion soup. It is so good.

"Here try mine," Nathan says and I about die on the spot.

"Amazing," I say and he smiles.

Our main course consists of steak, Caesar salad, and potatoes au gratin. I eat almost everything on my plate and I catch my dad eyeing me and he winks when he sees my plate.

After dinner Nathan takes my hand. "So do I get a dance tonight?" Nathan asks.

"Of course you do," I say and he presses me up against him. His hand finds the small of my back and we start to dance. He moves us across the floor. He knows how to move. My dad used to dance with me all the time. He is the one who taught me.

"You look stunning tonight," he says and I smile.

"Thank you, so do you," I say and he laughs.

He twirls me around and I laugh. The band is playing witchcraft by Frank Sinatra. Nathan hums quietly in my ear as we dance. Soon my feet start to hurt and we leave the dance floor. We sit and look out.

"The fireworks should be starting soon," I say.

"Should we get Spencer Cruz?" Nathan asks.

"We did make a promise," I say.

"And a promise we shall keep," he says and I smile. He takes my hand and we head over to the kids section. They have a mini dance floor and a bunch of activities. My family really does go all out.

"There she is," Nathan points to a little table. She is sitting with a cotton candy. I laugh as she eats it and bops her head to the music. Such a ham.

"Can we sit?" I ask her.

"There you are," She says and I laugh.

"How is the cotton candy?" I ask her.

"Yummy," She says.

"Are you tired?" I ask her.

"Mmm no," she says.

"Really?" Nathan asks as she yawns and she shrugs.

"Maybe," She says. She comes over and sits on Nathan's lap.

"The fireworks are starting soon should we go sit?" I ask her. she nods smiling we head to the viewing area and sit on a provided blanket.

Spencer sits in between Nathan's legs resting back. I smile and lean my head on his shoulder. We wrap a blanket on Spencer and watch as the countdown begins.

"5...4...3...2...1, HAPPY NEW YEAR," I lean in kissing Nathan and he puts his hand on my cheek. The fireworks begin and we look down at Spencer and she is asleep.

"I love you," Nathan says.

"I love you more," I say and we kiss again. It's going to be a happy new year.

—-

Today is my mock party and we'll I've been kicked out of my apartment. The girls are decorating and scheming apparently. I'm supposed to go to Kendra's to get ready she has my outfit which scares me and all my makeup.

I am walking in her building. She lives in a flat type of thing. It's just her in the room but there are a bunch of people in the hall. I walk onto her floor and knock.

"Pheebs," she smiles and welcomes me in. It is so cute in here. She decorated it so well.

"Hey girl," I say.

"Are you ready to get glammed up," she asks. She insists on doing everything. I'm fine with it.

"I think so," I say and she laughs.

"Sit down in the chair," she says motioning to her vanity desk chair. It is fluffy and white.

"Your wish is my command," I say and she laughs.

"So where are you headed next week?" She asks.

"New Jersey. I am staying at Nathan's and watching him play," I say and she smiles as she primes my face.

"That's so fun, I am jealous," she says.

"How are things with Brady?" I ask her.

"They are going. It is so hard with him being so far," she says and I smile.

"It's tough, but so worth it," I say. Brady goes to Cornell University.

"It's starting to feel less and less worth it," she says.

"Why do you say that?" I ask as she does my foundation.

"I don't know, every time we talk we fight and get more and more distant," she says.

"How was break?" I ask her.

"With him, amazing. We have never been closer it's just when we are far we bicker and the distance gets the best of us," she says.

"It's so hard and anyone who says it's not is lying. At the end of the day, you guys just have to decide if it is worth staying together or are you better apart," I say and she nods.

"I think we have different views on that," she says and I smile sadly.

"You need to do what makes you the happiest," I say and she nods.

"I know, it's just hard because I care about him sometimes more than my own happiness," she says.

"I've been there, and you're right it is so hard," I say.

"Close your eyes," she says and I smile doing as she says. I feel her doing my eyeshadow. I never wear eyeshadow because I am so bad at it.

"Okay open, now close," she says and I smile.

"Thank you for doing this," I say.

"You deserve it, Grey," she smiles sweetly.

After she does my makeup, she starts my hair. She straightens it and I realize just how long it is. I need a haircut. Nathan would laugh if he heard me say that.

Finally, it's time for my outfit. She hands it to me and I inspect it. "Just go put it on," she says and I laugh.

I go into the bathroom and see it's a two piece set. It's all black and very sleek. Where did she get this from? Hopefully, I get to keep it. I slip it on and it is so cute. It is a crop top and very cute pants that go together.

I walk out and she claps. "You are so hot holy shit," she says and I shake my head.

"Okay these shoes," she hands me very cute booties. If I get drunk enough I know I'll break an ankle.

"You look perfect and we are done just in time. Let's head over to the apartment," she says. I see it is 9 pm and I smile.

We head out and Kendra drives us over. When we get there we head upstairs. I hear loud music and am sure that our neighbors are going to love this.

I walk in and everyone yells and circles around me. I love these people so much. I smile at how amazing they are. Andrew comes up and wraps an arm around me and kisses my head.

"Happy early birthday kid," he says and I smile. I thank him.

I get a birthday cup full of lord knows what, but I start drinking anyway. It is sweet and very strong. Maisy and Olivia come up to me and I hug them both. "You guys didn't have to do this," I say and they laugh.

"Of course we did, Grey. It's your 20th," they say and I shake my head in disbelief.

"Thank you guys really," I say and they smile.

"We wouldn't miss celebrating you for the world," Olivia says and I smile. I have the best Friends.

The drinks are being poured by Maisy which means everyone is hammered in about 2 seconds. **I **am on my fourth vodka lemonade and it is hitting me. There is loud music and lots of dancing.

"Phoebe, happy birthday," I hear and I turn to see Ryan. He is a senior and here and is so nice. He and Andrew are friends.

"Oh my gosh, thank you," I say.

"So actually, I have a question," he says and I nod.

"What's up?" I ask.

"Your friend Olivia, is she single?" He asks. I smile and shake my head no.

"No she is dating TJ," I say and he frowns.

"Shit she is a total babe, well I'm not about to fuck with TJ," he says and I laugh. TJ is scary when he's angry.

"Grey, I have a surprise for you," I hear Caroline's voice. I'm so drunk I think it's Caroline. I stumble and turn.

"What is it?" I ask her laughing. She grabs my hand and takes me to my room. I know it's not Nathan that happened last year.

"Go in there," she says and I smile. I walk in and my blonde best friend is dressed in a shirt red romper.

"AVA," I yell and run and tackle her.

"Grey good god," she laughs. "Happy 20th birthday party," she says and I smile.

"How did you get here?" I ask her.

"With the help of your brother and his girlfriend," she says and I smile.

"I'm sorry I'm so drunk," I say feeling bad. She smirks and pulls a flask out. She sucks the flask down.

"I won't be far behind you now let's go party," she says.

We go out and start dancing to the music. We both get another Maisy drink. "I'm so happy you're here," I yelled in her ear.

"I'm so happy I am too," she yells back.

"Are we going to bars tonight?" She asks.

"Oh hell yeah," I say and she laughs pulling out her fake. I will need to grab mine.

Andrew comes over and hugs Ava. We all start talking before I walk over to Caroline. She is talking to our Sorority sister. She hugs me tightly.

"Are you excited for New Jersey?" She asks me.

"Yeah I am," I smile.

"Lots of sex huh?" She asks and I blush shaking my head.

"I know that look, be safe missy," she says and I laugh.

I talk to Caroline for a bit longer until the lights are turned out and I see the glow of the candles. Everyone starts singing happy birthday as a cake comes out. Holy crap.

I smile and when they finish blow out the candles. I wish for something special and hope it comes true. After we cut the cake and all the drunk people enjoy it.

I smile and enjoy the rest of my night that ends in a lot of drinking and fun. So much fun. I love all these people.

—

I am on my way to New Jersey. I am on my families jet this time. No making friends on a public plane. I really did enjoy meeting Priscilla last time thought.

Sawyer is with me and is reading his book. My birthday is tomorrow and I am quite excited about it. I can't believe I am going to be 20. Next year I'll be able to legally drink. So crazy.

We fly through the nighttime. We should be at Princeton around midnight. I told Nathan not to wait up for me and I'll lock up, and he told me I was crazy. I get it. I would want to see him.

I do some homework as we fly. I have an essay due, so I am working on it now. It is so interesting what I am learning about child development. I think only I would say that.

"We should be landing shortly," I head over the speaker. I close my laptop and stare out the window at the pitch black sky.

I grip the seat as we land and watch us roll in. I get into the car Sawyer rented. I lean against the seat and drift off.

"Phoebe," I get shaken awake. Holy crap I was out for that entire time. I guess I haven't been sleeping well. I've had a lot of work and a little time to do it.

"Holy crap, I slept that entire time," I say and Sawyer tells me I need to get sleep. I kind of lied to my parents and told them that I was sleeping at Olivia's friend who goes here's dorm when really I'm just going to stay with Nathan.

I take my bag and head upstairs. I open the door and there stands my very sexy man. He is in his pjs and is standing looking beautiful as ever. I run into his arms.

"Hi my girl," he says and I blush.

"I missed you," I say as I inhale his scent.

"I missed you more," he says. "You look so good," and I know he is just being nice. I feel disgusting.

"I look disgusting," I smile and look up at him.

"Not even close. You are stunning," he says and I shake my head. I rest my head on his chest as we hug again.

"Are you tired?" He asks brushing the hair out of my face. I nod and look up at him.

"Let's get you to bed then," I feel bad I hope he wasn't thinking we were going to have sex. I am so tired.

When I change into his T-shirt he is laying in his bed watching me. I feel bad he stayed up late and probably wanted sex. Shit. I crawl into bed and he wraps an arm around me.

I start kissing him and it turns deeper. We make out for a bit and then I reach to find the hem of his shirt. As I pull it up he grabs my hand stopping me. "Bee, you are exhausted. We have plenty of time for that. Get some sleep," he says and I smile.

"I felt bad, you stayed up late for me and well I thought I had to reciprocate," I say. Nathan frowns and turns towards me.

"You never have to feel bad about not wanting to have sex. Your body is your body and you need to listen to it," he says and I nod. He is so respectful towards me it blows my mind.

"How are you my boyfriend?" I ask him and brush my fingers against his cheek.

"I could ask you the same thing," he says.

"I would tell you I'm not your boyfriend if you said that," he laughs and starts tickling my ribs.

"Okay okay I'm sorry," I say laughing.

"Go to bed, we both have big days tomorrow," he says and I smile.

I lay on my side with Nathan behind me. He has his arm protectively wrapped around me. I end up falling asleep quickly in his arms.

I wake up and hear Nathan still breathing softly behind me. I check his clock and see it is 10. We went to bed around 1 so it makes sense. I am was so tired and feel great now. I have a pressing need to pee though.

Nathan's hand is wrapped around me still. Slyly I try to slide out. His grip tightens on me. I look back and he's still asleep. Protective even in his sleep. I take a deep breath and try again.

"Where are you going?" I hear Nathan's morning voice which I may add is so hot.

"I have to pee," I laugh. He lifts his arm up and I walk out of the room. As I'm walking to the bathroom in the kitchen there is a topless girl and Nathan's roommate making out in the kitchen. They don't see me so I run back to Nathan's room.

"Nathan," I poke him awake.

"Hmm?" He asks still sleeping.

"Nathan," I keep poking him. He sits up on his forearms and his biceps flex. Whew.

"Yes?" He asks rubbing his face awake.

"There's a naked girl in your kitchen," I say and Nathan looks confused.

"What?" He says.

"There is a naked girl making out with Zach in your kitchen," I say again.

"Jesus," he says and starts to get up to go out there. He slides on his pj pants and leaves his shirt off.

"Wait," I grab his arm.

"What?" He asks.

"She's naked I don't want you seeing her," I say. He looks at me and sighs.

"I am kicking them out. Not looking at her," he says and I frown motioning my hand for him to go do it.

"What the fuck, Zach?" He says. The girl covers her chest and grabs her dress slipping it on. Well what little of a dress there is.

"What man? Not like you haven't seen boobs before," he says and I stifle a laugh.

"I told you Phoebe was coming and to not do this shit," Nathan says. I can tell he isn't mad he's just frustrated.

"You said she was coming Thursday," he says.

"It's Friday," Nathan says and his roommates face drops.

"Fuck sorry man, I was just busy last night with Kayla," he says. The girls gasps and we all look at her.

"Are you fucking kidding, my name is Katelyn," she says and grabs her purse and shoes and storms out. Before she does she looks at him and says "you weren't even good in bed," Nathan starts dying laughing.

"What a bitch," he says.

"Dude you forgot her name and slept with her," I say.

"Phoebe's right, dick move," Nathan joins in laughing.

"Whatever, sorry you had to see that I'm Zach," he sticks out his hand and I'm reluctant to shake it because I just saw where it was.

"Oh sorry," he says going to the sink to wash his hands.

"Hi Zach I'm Phoebe," I say and we shake hands.

"We are going to the shack for breakfast," Nathan says.

"Okay I have class today, nice meeting you Phoebe," he says and grabs his backpack off the counter walking out.

"He didn't even change," I say.

"Welcome to Zach's world," Nathan says and I laugh. He looks so good in just his pj pants. He looks older and I can't put my finger on why.

"I have to change before we go," I say. I head back into his room and he follows. I slip off my shirt and put on jeans and a long sleeve. It's pretty chilly today.

"You look stunning," Nathan says coming up behind me and kissing my neck.

"Now I know you're lying," I say and he shakes his head.

"Let's go," he says and takes my hand.

We head out. He takes me to the shack. We sit down at a window table. We both get coffee and water.

"What's good here?" I ask him.

"Everything. But the crepes are really good," he says. I'll take his word for it. He gets the strawberry Nutella crepes and I get the bananas foster crepes.

"I miss you," I say and rub my nail over his finger.

"I've missed you too. I'm excited for you to get to watch me play," he says and I smile.

"Me too, do you guys have a game over spring break?" I ask him. Last year we met up over spring break.

"We do but it is in Texas," he says and I frown. Poor timing.

"Damnit," I say.

"Do you know what you guys are doing yet?" He asks.

"Olivia said something about going to her house in Florida," I say and Nathan nods.

"That'd be fun, you could say hi to all my old friends for me," he says and it's a sad smile on his face.

"What?" I ask. He shakes his head and I frown.

"What is wrong. Something is obviously bothering you," I say and he shakes his head.

"Nathan," I say.

"I don't want you going to Florida without me there," he says and I raise my eyebrows. The waiter interrupts us by putting down plates. Once he walks away I look to Nathan.

"Why would you say that," I ask him.

"Last time we were there you know what happened, this time I won't be there to prevent it," he says and I frown.

"Nothing is going to happen to me," I say.

"Just worries me, you are the sweetest thing in my life," he says and I smile.

"We don't even know what we're doing yet," I say and he nods.

We finish and head home for the rest of the day we hang out. Have lots of sex and then hand out some more. It is not very productive.

Finally, Nathan has to leave for his game. I'm going after he leaves. I have courtside seats. It's just me going.

"See you soon," he kisses me goodbye.

"Bye hottie," I say squeezing his butt. He laughs and walks out.

After he heads out I leave an hour after. I go wearing one of his Princeton shirts tied in the front with ripped jeans. I go and sit.

Watching Nathan play is one of my favorite things. I take pictures and send them to my parents. He is playing amazing tonight. He rubs by me and winks.

He looks so sexy on the court. When half time rolls around I sit on my phone. There are two girls behind me talking and I hear Nathan's name pop up.

"He's just so hot," I hear the one girl say.

"I'd let him do anything to me, and he posts the cutest things with his girlfriend," I smile at the second part. They know he's taken.

"Really let me see," she says.

"Omg the caption, usually I wear my heart on my sleeve but this time it's on my back," I know the picture they are talking about. It's when Nathan and I went on a hike and he carried me on his back over the mud and my dad got a picture.

"I mean that is so cute, but he isn't loyal to her," my heart sinks and I listen closer. It's just two girls gossiping.

"What do you mean?" The one girl asks. I'm holding back tears.

"I heard he made out and felt up Brooke Zellers at the bar on fifth," she says.

"No way, I doubt that," please not be true I think to myself.

"I don't know apparently there is some video going around," my heart is torn out of my chest. The game starts again and I sit there barely able to figure out what just happened.

After the game, I am heart broken. I can't stop thinking about what those girls said or that video. My birthday is tomorrow and all I want to do is go home.

"Hey baby," Nathan says and comes up to me.

"Good job," I say and dodge his kiss when he tries to come forward.

"What's going on?" He asks.

"I don't want to talk about it here," I say and he frowns.

"Is everything okay?" He asks on the way home. I don't respond and stare out the window.

When we get inside his apartment, he shuts the door and puts his bag down. "What is going on?" He asks.

"Did you make out with a Brooke Zeller at a bar?" I say.

"What are you talking about? How do you even know who Brooke Zellers is?" He asks. Why is that his only question.

"Answer my question, did you make out with her?" I ask him.

"No what? Why would you even think that?" He asks.

"Because I heard two girls talking behind me and they said there is a video of you making out with another girl," I say and tears stream down my face.

"And you believe them over your boyfriend of 3 years? Phoebe I don't know what I have to do to make you trust me. I swear I am constantly trying to prove myself to you," He starts to raise his voice.

"If you heard guys say that about me then I'm sure you would freak," I say.

"Yeah I would but not on you. On them for saying that about my girl, you want the video of Brooke? Here, I'm taking a shower," he throws his phone down after typing in something. He slams the door to his bathroom and I start crying.

I grab his phone and low and behold it's a video of a beautiful blonde making out with a brunette kid that could look like Nathan if you squint. Or maybe it does and I just know him too well.

Fuck, what did I just do?

—-

I am sitting on the couch in his apartment staring at my hands. I didn't mean to doubt him. I am seriously feeling bad. I hear the shower turn off and I go into his room. I sit on his bed and he comes out.

He walks out and has a towel wrapped around his waist. He ignores me and I sigh. "Nathan, can we talk," I say.

"Phoebe, I've done nothing to make you doubt me. But over and over again you continue to make me the bad guy" he says.

"I'm sorry, Nathan I am," I say.

"I get that, but you have no idea what it is like to be constantly accused of stupid shit. I would never make out with another girl," he raises his voice and puts on his pj pants and boxers.

"It's just hard to ignore it when girls behind me say there's a video of you making out with this girl," I try to defend my stupid actions.

"Phoebe, you've never met those girls. They could have not even known me," he says. "You constantly buy into this shit. I am so loyal to you, Phoebe. You don't even understand it," he yells and I wipe my face off with my hands.

"This is a cycle that just repeats and repeats," he is really getting going now. "You hear some bullshit rumor that people love to talk about and you believe it," his voice is raised. "If I did that to you, you would freak. It's exhausting being contestant fucking doubted," he yells. I am a mess now.

"Are you even going to say anything?" He asks. This is bad.

"I'm just scared okay? I'm scared I'm not enough for you. You are so attractive, you are so kind, you play basketball for one of the most prestigious universities in the US, and you are smart. Genius smart. You are a complete catch and no one could deny it. You have fan pages on Instagram. I am just Phoebe. I'm not anything special and the girls around here are so beautiful. I'm sorry I doubt you. It's just so hard to force myself to believe that I am enough," I say. He is looking at me like I have three heads. He walks over to me and cups my cheeks.

"Don't you ever talk about yourself that way again. You are everything I need. Enough doesn't even measure up to what you are," he says and tears stream down my face.

"I'm sorry" I say and he sighs.

"I just need you to believe me. There is not a soul in this world that would make me cheat on you. You are enough. More than enough," he says.

"I'm sorry Nathan. I really am I fucked up," I say and he shakes his head.

"I lost my cool, I shouldn't have done that," he says and I wrap an arm around him.

"You are always way too patient with me," I say and he laughs.

"I love you," I say.

"I love you more, Phoebe," he says.

"It's 12:03," he says. I look to the clock.

"You don't miss much do you?" I say and he laughs shaking his head.

"No sassy pants I don't and it is your birthday," he says and I realize I am 20. Holy crap.

"It is," I say.

He smiles and starts to kiss me. He lays me back on my back and pulls away. "Happy birthday," he says as his hand creeps up my shirt.

"Mmm thank you," I say as we continue kissing. The other reason we are meant to be together is because how mercurial we both are. One minute we are fighting the next. Well.

After we have our way with each other Nathan gets off of me and lays next to me. "Happy birthday, baby," he says. I smile and rest my head on his chest.

"I love you," I say.

"I love you too," he says and I smile.

"Now get some sleep, we have a big day tomorrow," He says and I smile. This boy. My love.

_**FEBRUARY **_

My dad is coming up and meeting me today! He has a meeting at WSU for his internship program that is launching this year. His meeting ends at 11 and we are going to Soup Spoon. I am so excited to see him. It'll be so good to get to see someone from home. Especially him.

I am cleaning up the apartment now. It has been kind of a mess recently. I do not want it to be a mess when my dad comes by. So far, I have wiped the counters down, vacuumed and reassembled the living room.

I get changed into jeans and a sweater and wait for my dad. Finally, I hear a knock on the door. I rush over to answer it.

"Hey Bubs," he says. He is in his black suit looking very sharp.

"You look so nice," I say as I hug him.

"I had my meeting earlier, the apartment looks great," he says as he walks in and looks around.

"I was scrambling to clean it before you came," I laugh.

"Oh you didn't have to do that, besides I did raise Teddy as a son," he says and we both laugh. Let's just say Ted isn't the most organized.

"Are you hungry?" I ask him. He walks over to my kitchen and I realize I forgot to put away the alcohol. Shit.

"I am hungry," he says and lifts up a bottle of vodka.

"Really?" He asks. I bite my lip and shrug.

"I hope you are being safe and smart," he says.

"Always," I say. He opens up the fridge and I think he has a stroke. We haven't eaten at home in probably weeks. All that's in the fridge is left over pizza, beer, some white claws, and fruit.

"Oh my gosh, Phoebe. Where is your food?" He asks.

"We have been doing a lot of ordering food and snacking," I say.

"I'm having Sawyer stock the fridge, this is unacceptable," he says and I frown.

"It's fine, I'll go to the grocery store," I try to reason with him.

"No, while we are at lunch he is going," my dad says and I sigh. There is no fighting Christian Grey on food related issues.

"Sounds good, you ready to go eat?" I ask him.

"Of course," he says and we walk out. After I give him a big hug, Taylor drives us to soup spoon. We get out and go inside and get seated.

"So how was your meeting?" I ask him.

"It went very well. The program is launching and being announced next month after spring break," he says and I nod.

"So when do the interns start working?" I ask him.

"The students who are eligible and want to apply will do so at the end of March. Then we pick our four applicants and they start interning May 30th. It goes all throughout the summer and they are rotating to different jobs and parts of the company," he says and I nod.

"Wow that sounds super cool," I say.

"Well hopefully it helps the students," he says and I smile. We order our food and the waitress takes our menus.

"How was New Jersey for your birthday?" He asks.

"It was so good to see Nathan. I missed him a lot. They won their game too which was good," I say and he smiles.

"That is good to hear, your mother said that you mentioned spring break plans to her, what are they?" My dad asks.

"We are going to Olivia's house in florida," I say and he frowns. Oh no.

"I would rather you go to our house in California again," he says.

"Dad, Olivia was very excited to go home. She never gets to go visit home, it's like Teddy," I say and he doesn't look convinced.

"Phoebe, last time you were there you got drugged. I do not feel comfortable letting you go to that same place again," I shake my head.

"Dad that kid won't be there. And besides we all already have made plans to go," I say.

"Phoebe, I love you, but I really do not want you going," he says. The waiter brings out our food.

"Dad, all my friends are going and I only have so many spring breaks left," I say and he frowns.

"Phoebe, your safety is more important than you having a good time to me," He says and I shake my head.

"Dad, Nothing is going to happen like that again. That kid won't be there and I learned my lesson," I say.

"We'll talk about this later," he says and I take a bite of my soup. Jokes on him I already bought my plane ticket.

We finish up lunch and head back to my apartment. I walk in to find Olivia and Maisy stoking our fridge. Sawyer bought a lot of food.

"Look at you two," I say and they laugh.

"Hi Mr. Grey," Olivia says.

"Oh hi Mr. Grey," Maisy says after.

"Maisy, Olivia, how are you girls?" He asks.

"Great, thank you so much for getting us this food," Olivia says.

"Well I do not know how much food you can make out of cheap vodka and beer, leftover pizza, and fruit," he says and we all laugh.

"Thank you so much," Maisy says.

"Not a problem girls, how are your studies going?" He asks them.

"They are going well, it's getting more difficult as the years go on," Olivia says.

"Agreed," Maisy says.

"Well the best thing to do is to keep studying," my dad says and we all nod.

My dad and I end up spending the rest of the day together. I decide not to bring up spring break again until we are on the plane to Florida. Hopefully my dad just forgets and we can just go in peace.

—

It is Valentine's Day and I am going to Galetine's day at the sorority house. I have my little now that recruitment and rush is over. Unfortunately, it happened in the fall and I was with my grandpa majority of the time in the hospital.

The girls were so understanding and so sweet about it. My littles name is Harper, she is the sweetest southern bell from Tennessee. She is studying to become a nurse.

Maisy and I walk into the sorority house together and already the place is crazy. There is wine, champagne, and vodka for us. Also the best pizza place catered pizza, subs, and salads. Every girls dream.

We are watching romcoms and drinking. Every big and little get to sit together. We also have matching pjs. Super cheesy but cute.

"Okay girls, grab food and a drink first movie up is Crazy Stupid Love," our sorority president yells.

I sit down and wait for Harper. I give her a hug after she sets her stuff down. "Oh my gosh, I can't believe y'all put this on," she says and I smile.

"Isn't it fun? Last year we went to a party, but this year we wanted to just relax and chill," I say. She smiles and takes a sip of her drink.

"I've never seen this movie before," she says.

"Oh my gosh, it is amazing," I say. The movie starts and everyone is eating and drinking. It is so much fun.

We all get through the movie with minimal talking and many laughs. As the movie ends I look over at Harper and she is smiling. "I can't believe I've never seen that. Ryan Gosling is so hot," she says and I laugh.

"That he is, do you want another drink?" I ask her and she nods. I get her some more wine.

"Oh thank you, Pheebs, how is Nathan?" She asks me.

"Great, I actually just got back from Princeton two days ago," I say and she smiles.

"Oh no way. How was it?" She asks.

"It was good, it was really good to see Nate and watch him play again," I say and she smiles.

"How long have y'all been together?" She asks.

"4 years this November," I say and she shakes her head.

"That is crazy, if y'all last through college you'll have what 6 years under your belt?" She says and I am blown away by that comment. I didn't even think about that.

"Well when you say it like that," I say and she laughs.

"That is crazy, y'all are so cute though. I just followed him on his Instagram. He posts the cutest things of you," she says and I laugh. That is not the first time I have heard that.

"I know he does, I am very lucky," I say.

"That you are," she smiles.

"So what's the boy situation like with you?" I ask her sipping my wine.

"I just broke up with my boyfriend actually. We thought we could last through college and freshman year got the best of us," she says and I frown.

"I'm sorry, Harper. What happened?" I ask.

"Well I went here and he stayed in state and went to the University of Tennessee. He was mad I didn't stay, but he denied it of course. He started becoming skeptical of me and not talking to me for weeks, so I finally broke it off," she says. That would be horrible. On top of your freshman year stress. I would have been in denial.

"I am in awe of you, I would have been a mess," I admit. "I am always here for you, if you ever need anything," I say.

"Thanks Pheebs," She says and hugs me.

"The next movie is 10 things I hate about you," our president, Taylor calls out. I smile and sit back.

"What's this one about?" Harper asks. Is she kidding? My mouth drops open.

"Be prepared to be mind blown," I say. She laughs and looks up at the screen.

The rest of the night is spent drinking, watching, and having a lot of fun. I love these girls so much.

—-

I have not had enough Andrew time this semester. I am going to his apartment right now and am forcing him to hang out with me. I have his favorite pizza with me.

I go up to his apartment door and start banging. Soon he opens the door and I smile. "Hey Grey, what's up?" He asks.

"I miss you," I say and he smiles.

"I miss you too, come inside is that for me?" He motions to the pizza.

"You know it," I say.

"Oh I love you," he says.

I set the pizza down on his counter and sit down on a chair. He gets himself a beer and passes me one too. "So update me, what has been up with you?" He asks.

"Not much, just getting ready for spring break. I am sure Maisy has told you," I say and he looks down awkwardly.

"What?" I ask him.

"You haven't heard? Maisy cheated on me over winter break," he says. My heart drops why did no one tell me.

"Oh my gosh, Andrew I am so sorry. I didn't know. Are you okay?" I ask him.

"I am fine, we are working through it but honestly I don't see us making it through the school year," he says.

"I really am sorry. How did you find out?" I ask him.

"She told me after it happened. She felt really bad, but between you and me, I don't think it was an accident," he says and I nod. She always has had feelings for her ex.

"How are you handling it?" I ask him.

"I am fine, I was hurt when she told me. Now it is just old news. I can't believe you didn't know," he says.

"I don't think Olivia knows," I say. Maisy never told us.

"Oh yes she does, remember that fight they got into before your birthday party? That was about Maisy and me," he says. I do remember them bickering, but I just assumed it was pointless girl drama.

"How is Nathan?" Andrew asks as I take a sip of my beer.

"He is good. I miss him a lot. They are in Boston this week," I tell him.

"That is awesome. I have Princeton going far in my bracket," he says.

"I am sure Nathan will love to hear it," I say. I take a couple more bites of my pizza.

"He was the one that helped me make it," he says.

"I am glad you two are besties now," I say and he shakes his head.

We finish off eating our pizza and end up on the patio drinking a couple of more beers. I forgot how much I missed him. After an hour or so we are both drunk and sitting on the patio watching people walk by.

"What are you guys doing for spring break you never ended up telling me?" He asks.

"Florida, going to Olivia's house. Nathan is nervous about me going, but I have told him over and over I am fine," I say and he laughs.

"Well you know you have to be safe is probably what he meant," he says.

"Oh the bromance continues," I say and he laughs.

"Gosh Grey, I missed you," he says and I laugh.

"I missed you more," I say.

I end up just sleeping at Andrew's apartment on his couch. I was too drunk to come home and he even called Nathan who insisted I sleep over. It was so good catching up with Andrew.

_**MARCH **_

We leave for spring break next week. My dad has been trying to get a hold of me and I am too scared to tell him that I am going to Florida whether he likes it or not.

Sawyer has told him I'm fine, and has told me to call him, but I just am scared. I am packing now and am on FaceTime with Nathan.

"Why don't you just tell him you'll be safe and Sawyer will be there, so he doesn't have to worry," he says.

"You've met my dad. That would work with any normal parent, but Christian Grey Hell no," I say and he nods.

"Olivia's parents will be there right," he says.

"Yeah, but I think his problem is they won't be there obviously when we go boating and go out," I say and he frowns.

"What?" I say as I fold all my bathing suits.

"You guys are going on the boat?" He asks and I nod.

"It's some of your guy friends spring break too," I say and he sighs.

"Nathan, come on," I say.

"What?" He asks.

"You know what," I say. "I'm not going to hook up with any of your friends, especially after what happened," I say trying to reassure him.

"I know, I'm just…"

"Over the top protective," I cut him off as he is talking.

"Worried about you," he finishes his sentence.

"You don't need to be, I have Sawyer, and the girls, and Olivia's parents," I say.

"I know but you are my girl, I'm always worried about you," he says and I smile.

"And I love you for that," I say and he smiles.

"I miss you so much," Nathan says shaking his head.

"That makes two of us, when will I see you next?" I ask him.

"Well… summer break right," he says.

"I think so, uh that is so far away," I sigh.

"It'll fly by besides you have spring break next week," he says and I smile.

"I am so ready to get the hell out of here," I say and he smiles.

"I bet, how has class been this week?" He asks.

"Hellish, I'm applying for internships when I get back," I say and he nods.

"Which ones," he asks.

"Well, one is at a children's hospital in Bellevue, and one is at a children's hospital in Seattle, then the other is a children's hospital in Portland," I say and he smiles.

"Wow, I am so proud of you, Bee," he says and I smile.

"Thank you, I'm excited. I really hope I get the one in Seattle," I say.

"If you put your mind to it, I bet you can do it," he says.

"You're too sweet," I smile.

We hang up after talking for a bit longer. I miss that boy so much. I continue to pack and when I am done I head out to my kitchen. I make myself a small salad and get myself a water. I sigh and start reading the chapter of the textbook I need to read for tonight.

Suddenly my phone rings again and it's my mom. I pick it up and hold it against my ear as I read. "Hello?" I ask.

"So you answer your mother and not me," my dads voice comes through the phone. Fuck.

"I've been insanely busy, Dad," I say.

"I saw that you leave for Florida in three days," he says and I sigh.

"Dad, I really just didn't want you telling me that I couldn't go," I say.

"Phoebe, if I wasn't going to allow you to go I would have driven down to school weeks ago and told you," he says and he makes a very fair point sometimes I forget who my dad is.

"Yeah you're right," I say and he sighs.

th

"I just wanted to talk safety with you," he says and I put my salad plate down.

"Okay," I say just allowing it to happen.

"When you guys get there you need to let Sawyer know where you'll be at all times. He has the tracker on your phone and don't do anything because I will fly down to Florida," he starts and I roll my eyes.

"Don't roll your eyes, this is your safety not mine," he says and I swear he has cameras in here.

"No taking drinks from strangers… even if you think you know them. Don't drink and drive, don't let others drink and drive you around. It's better to be safe than sorry call Sawyer if you need anything. No drugs and I mean of any kind I don't care how minor people say they are," he says and I feel like I am in the dare program in fifth grade.

"Lastly, take pictures and send them to your mom and me. We love seeing you having fun," he says.

"Thank you for letting me go," I say.

"You're welcome, please just listen to these rules Phoebe. I am really trying to be cool here," he says and I smile.

"You don't have to try to be cool, you are cool," I say and he laughs.

"I'm sure, have so much fun, and try to keep in touch," he says.

"I love you," I say.

"I love you too, Bubs," he says and I smile.

After we hang up, I get back to my school work. I am trying to cram it all and get it all done before we leave. Maisy comes home drunk as a skunk and lays across the couch.

"Pheebs," she says.

"Yeah?" I ask her.

"I think I want to break up with Andrew," she says and I look down at her. After what andrew told me last week I am starting to wonder if that has something to do with it.

"Why do you say that?" I ask her.

"Because I hooked up with my ex and I am thinking I am starting to like him again," she says and I sigh.

"Maisy, you're drunk as can be right now. It's not a good idea to think about this and try to come to a decision," I say.

"This is the reason I'm drunk," she says and I frown.

"Have you talked to andrew?" I ask her.

"No," she says.

"Then that should be your first step," I say and she smiles.

"You're the best, but I need to go puke now," she says and runs into the bathroom. I shake my head as I get back to studying.

I really hope they don't break up, but if they think it is what is best then they probably should.

—

It's Florida day! I am making coffee in the kitchen while Maisy and Liv rush around doing last minute things. I get them each a to go cup and grab my suitcase.

"Guys come on time to go," I say trying to get them to hurry up.

"Okay I'm ready," Liv says. She grabs her coffee mug and Maisy rushes in after her. We all get our mugs and walk out.

Sawyer is taking us to the airport. We're all exhausted and hungover. Maisy thought it'd be a good idea to get us all wine drunk last night. I'm resting my head on Olivia's shoulder as we drive.

"You girls look like you had it rough," Sawyer says. Olivia and I both shoot a look to Maisy.

"What I never said that you guys had to drink," Maisy says.

"Uh huh," Olivia says and I laugh.

When we get to the airport we head inside. We have to go through security and all that and I feel horrible doing it. I end up having to get a pat down because my jean zipper set off the metal detector. Olivia and Maisy are in seventh heaven watching me laughing their asses off.

"I hate you both," I say as we head back to our gate.

"You love us," Liv says and I laugh. We sit down and plug our phones in talking about Florida.

We board the plane. I sit next to Sawyer and Olivia and Maisy are behind us. I rest my head on his shoulder and close my eyes as they go through all the mandatory stuff.

By take off, I am fully asleep on Sawyer's shoulder. Thank the lord he is here. I know Maisy and Olivia are jealous they both think he is so hot which makes me want to throw up. He's like my second dad.

I wake up about three hours into the flight. I look back to see Olivia and Maisy sleeping. I laugh at that. Sawyer brushes my hair out of my face and smiles at me.

"You feel better?" He asks.

"Somewhat, I'm still kind of tired," I say rubbing the sleep out of my eyes.

"Did you guys have a fun night?" He asks and I nod.

"We really did," I say and he smiles.

"How has school been this semester compared to last?" He asks me.

"More challenging than ever. Psychology has gotten a lot harder," I admit and he nods.

"Make sure you are utilizing your resources and going to your professors," he says and I nod.

"I know I do. Sometimes it's hard though," I say and he nods.

"I get that, I'm always here if you need me, even though I was a business major," he says.

"Where did you go to school?" I ask him.

"I went to Stanford," he says and my eyes shoot open.

"No way, why didn't I know that?" I ask him.

"I don't know you never asked," he says and I smile.

"Well then why did you start doing personal security," I ask him.

"I was in between jobs and your dad hired me. You know I was your mom's until she had Teddy. Then I became Teddy's and when you were born they were trying to find someone for you and the only person who you would let hold you without screaming was me. So your dad decided that Dovis would go to Teddy and I would be yours," he says and I smile.

"I don't think anyone has ever told me that story," I say and he smiles.

"It's a true story," he says and I smile.

We end up landing in Florida and getting our luggage. We head to Olivia's house. I remember being there when I was with Nathan. It is a beautiful large home.

"Here we are," Olivia says.

"Holy shit, this place is amazing," Maisy says as we get out of the car.

"Thank you," Olivia says.

An older brunette comes running out of the front door who I recognize as Olivia's mom. "Oh my Liv," she says as she hugs Olivia.

"Hi mom," I smile at the reunion. Olivia doesn't get to come home as often as I do. That would be so hard.

"How are you, you look to thin, all of you do," she says making us laugh.

"Hi Phoebe," she says to me and hugs me.

"Hi Mrs. Stands," I say as we hug.

"Oh none of that Mrs. Stands stuff call me Amanda," she says and I smile.

We walk inside and Olivia's house is beautiful. So nicely decorated and built. A guy older than us stands in the kitchen. Whew he is hot.

"Hey Liv," he says as they hug.

"Hi Sam," she says.

"Guys this is Sam my brother," I knew she had an older brother but I never knew he looked like this.

"Hi Sam," I say and we shake hands. I have to nudge Maisy to stop staring at him.

"Hi I'm Maisy," she says and smiles.

We head upstairs to Olivia's room. "You never said your brother was a Greek god," Maisy says hitting Olivia's arm.

"You have a boyfriend," Olivia says.

"Not anymore," Maisy says back.

"What?" Olivia and I say back at the same time.

"Well I was going to tell you guys last night but you both got drunk as skunks," Maisy says and I roll my eyes.

"Says the one who initiated the drinking," I say and she shrugs.

"Whatever, but yeah. Our relationship just hasn't been what it was and we decided it was better to break it off," she says.

"I'm sorry, Mase," I say and she shakes her head.

"It's for the better," she says.

"But about your brother," Maisy says looking at Olivia who smacks her with a pillow.

That night we eat at Olivia's and end up going out. We go to this kid named Taylor's house. It is huge and right on the beach. We are in the backyard drinking and partying. It is so fun meeting all of Nathan and Olivia's friends.

"Hey here she is," I feel a guy put his hand on my shoulder and I spill my drink a bit.

"Uhm hi," I say and suddenly a phone is shoved in my face. I see Nathan on the screen and I smile looking to the guy.

"Nathan couldn't come so we are bring the party to him," the guy says and I smile.

"Hi Nate," I say.

"Hey Bee, you look beautiful," he says and I smile. Ever the charmer.

"How is florida treating you?" He asks.

"It's good really, I miss you though," I say and he smiles.

"I miss you too, be careful tonight and call me later," he says.

"I will, I love you," I say and he smiles blowing me a kiss. The kid he is on the phone with runs away.

The rest of the night is spent partying and drinking. It is so much fun but I know I am going to be hungover as hell tomorrow.

—-

We wake up the next day to quite the hangover. It is 11 and I am ready to get to the pool. We are going to Olivia's friend, Aleena, house.

I get on my white bikini and put on sunscreen. I head out to the porch where Maisy and Olivia are eating fruit salad. "Hey you don't look at all hungover," Maisy says.

"Fuck off," I say and get myself some fruit.

"Good morning to you too," Olivia teases.

"What time did we get in last night?" I ask Olivia.

"When we left Taylor's it was half past 3," Olivia says.

"Fuck," Maisy says and we laugh.

"Today is going to be fun," Maisy says as she makes us mimosas.

"I don't know if I can drink anymore," I say as she pours a generous amount of champagne.

"Hair of the dog, come on you say that every time your hungover," Maisy says and I take my glass.

"To me getting laid," Maisy says and we laugh.

"To a good week in Florida," Olivia says.

We drink our mimosas and sit on the porch. After relaxing for a bit we decide to head to Aleena's. I heard she is very sweet, so I am excited.

On the way there, Nathan calls me. Olivia is taking us in their golf cart which is so much fun. "Hey," I say.

"Hi Bee, how are you?" He asks.

"Good, how are you?" I ask him.

"Great now that I'm talking to you," he says making me smile.

"Are you excited for your game tonight?" I ask him.

"Somewhat excited, I wish I could be in Florida with you," he says and I smile.

"I know I wish you could too," I say.

"Where are you guys going today?" He asks.

"Aleena's house," I tell him.

"Oh that's so much fun, our moms are good friends," he says and I smile.

"Well I will be sure to tell her hello, I think we are here so I have to go," I say.

"Okay be safe, text me," he says.

"I love you," I say.

"Love you more," he says before we hang up.

"Liv," I hear a scream that startled me. A petite brunette starts running towards us.

"Lena," Olivia yells as they hug. Maisy and I smile at each other.

"Aleena these are my friends and roommates Maisy and Phoebe," Olivia introduces us. Aleena hugs Maisy and me being so sweet.

"It's so nice to meet y'all," she says. I can hear a bit of a southern accent from her.

"Well come on in and make yourself at home," she says.

We go into her backyard with a huge pool. It is so nice here. We all lay on lounge chairs and Aleena gives us each a gin and tonic.

"So tell me about y'all," she says. I look to Maisy to start.

"I'm Maisy, I'm from a small town in Utah. I am studying fashion merchandising," she says and I take over.

"I'm Phoebe Grey, I'm from Seattle, I am studying psychology," I say and she nods.

"Well I'm Aleena, I am from Alabama. I moved her my junior year of high school and Liv took me under her wing. I go to University of Alabama and studying economics," she says. I knew she was southern.

"It's so great to meet you," I say.

"Oh my goodness y'all too. Are the drinks okay?" She asks.

"Perfect thank you so much," I say.

We lay out and talk about school. It's so funny hearing how different school is in the south. Aleena seems like the perfect southern bell though. Her boyfriend goes to Alabama too. His name is Chase.

"So Phoebe, I heard you have a pretty serious boyfriend who I know," Aleena says and I smile.

"Yes my boyfriend is Nathan Moore," I say and Aleena smiles.

"No way, Moore picked a good one. How long have y'all been dating," she asks me.

"4 years this November," I say and her eyes bug out.

"4 years. That's longer than my parents were together before they got married. Have you guys gone on breaks," she says.

"No, we haven't. We've been together all four years," I say and sip my drink.

"Holy hell, that's amazing," she says. "Anywho what are we doing tonight," she asks.

"We are going to Reed's," Olivia says as she sips her drink.

"I have not seen him since we have been here. I'm excited I miss that kid," she says.

"His house is on the beach, and I think we are outside tonight because his dad is home," Olivia says and Aleena nods.

"I'm so hot," Maisy says and jumps in the pool. I follow her and jump in.

After swimming and laying out for awhile, we head back home to get ready. I have decided to wear my black romper that is completely open back. I curl my hair and do my makeup.

We eat dinner at Olivia's house. Her mom made us gnocchi and it was so good. We also had glasses of wine with dinner. Olivia's parents are very relaxed as long as they have the keys to her car and golf cart.

"Okay, you guys ready?" Olivia asks. We head out and start walking to Reed's. It's at most a ten minute walk.

We get there and head inside. It is a beautiful house that leads right to the beach. We walk to the backyard and there's loud music and lots of drinking.

"Liv," two girls run up to Olivia. Maisy and I go to get drinks. I make myself a vodka lemonade. Maisy uses the club soda and vodka.

We walk out and I see Aleena. We walk over to her and she is talking to a strawberry blonde I know I have seen before.

"Hey ladies," Aleena says. "This is Sloan," she smiles and greets us both.

"Phoebe and I met when Nate brought her down here a couple summers ago," she says and I knew I knew her from somewhere.

"Sloan, it has been too long," I hear a males voice say.

"Aj, i assure you it hasn't," she rolls her eyes and I fight back my laughter. I like her sass.

"Oh don't be like that, aren't you going to introduce me to your friends?" He asks.

"Are you not capable?" She says and I smile.

"I'm Aj, nice to meet you guys," he says and we shake his hand.

"Phoebe," I say and shake his hand.

"So where are you ladies from?" He asks.

"We both go to Washington state with Olivia," I say and he looks to Aleena.

"Nice, I go to the University of Washington," he says and we smile.

"Oh cool, so you live close to Phoebe then," Maisy says.

"You're a Seattle girl?" He asks.

"Yeah, born and raised," I say and he gives Aleena a look to which she shakes her head.

"Well it's been good talking to you both I need to go say hey to my brother," he says and walks off.

"Aj is going to try and get with you," Aleena says and looks at me.

"What? No he isn't," I say and she laughs.

"The look he gave me, trust me he is. Aj is a dick, his twin brother Cole who is right there, is a saint," Aleena says.

"I have a boyfriend, I don't want him trying to get with me," I say and Maisy laughs. I glare at her and she sips her drink.

"Don't worry, you just have to be straight up with him," Aleena says and I nod.

We head out and start talking to a bunch of people. All of Nathan's friends come up and meet me. They all tell me to have Moore get his ass back here. It makes me smile.

I excuse myself to use the restroom and head inside. I relieve myself in the beautifully done first floor bathroom and then head out. When I walk out Aj is standing leaning against the wall.

"Hey Phoebe is it?" He says and uncrosses his arms.

"Yep," I say.

"So I was thinking sense your family lives in Seattle you probably are there a lot," he says.

"Yeah," I say and he smiles.

"So if you ever want to come see UW I wanted to give you this," he passed me a card with his number on it. "I live in an apartment and my room has a futon in it," he says and I sigh.

"Aj I have a boyfriend. I appreciate the offer a lot and am sure UW is amazing," I say and he smiles.

"Who said I was trying to get with you," he says as he puts his hand on the wall above me leaning against it.

I hold up his number that he has written out on a small card.

"I'm just being friendly, Phoebe. If I wanted you, I would already have you," he says and I scoff. What a self absorbed prick.

"Yeah I'm sure, now didn't you have to use the restroom?" I say.

"No," he says.

"Do you wait outside while everyone pees?" I ask him and start to walk outside before he can answer. What a dick.

I walk out to Maisy and she is drunk talking to some guy. "Phoebe, this is Anthony, he goes to Arizona," she says and I smile at him.

"Nice to meet you," I say. I've reached my quota of meeting guys.

I end up going and doing shots with Sloan and Aleena. We do about 6 and I am really starting to feel them. I stumble out to the beach with Sloan and we put our toes in the water.

"It is so nice out here," she slurs and I nod laughing.

"It is amazing," I say.

"Wanna go get in his pool?" She asks.

"Of course, let's do it," I laugh. We run and jump into his pool with everyone. The rest of the night ends up being so much fun. We get home at about 3 in the morning.

This is the vacation I needed more than anything just a bunch of fun and little stress.

—-

We got home from the beach a couple of days ago. It is starting to not be freezing in Vancouver too so it is nice. I am adjusting back to classes and normal life.

I just got back from my psych class and am stopping at the Brew. I grab myself a coffee and danish. I see andrew sitting at a table working on his laptop.

"Hey stranger," I say.

"Oh my gosh, hey Phoebe," he says and we hug.

"Sit with me, tell me about break," he says. I sit and start eating my danish with him.

"It was so much fun, we went out a lot with Olivia's friends from home and just laid out at the pool during the day," I say and he smiles.

"That sounds like so much fun," he says.

"How were the mountains?" I ask him. Andrew went hiking with some frat guys over spring break.

"The views were amazing and it was a lot of fun," he says. He shows me some pictures and they were amazing.

"How was class," he says eyeing my backpack that I still have on.

"It was fine, still getting back into the swing of things, what are you working on?" I ask him.

"Internship applications," he says and I nod.

"Which ones are you going for?" I ask him.

"Well the big one would be your fathers, and the others are at smaller companies," he says.

"No way, I will have to tell him and put in a good word for you," I say and he smiles.

"You would do that?" He asks.

"Of course I would, besides I doubt there are people out there that are better than you," I say and he laughs.

"Look I got to go because I have a paper due tonight, but it was so good to see you. Will I see you out tomorrow?" I ask him.

"Yes you will, I am excited," he says and I smile. I take my coffee to go and wave as I walk out.

I walk home to my apartment building. When I head up and put the key in the door I see it is already open. I am confused because Maisy is in Utah and Olivia has slept at Tjs and hasn't been home since.

I walk in and scream falling on my butt and dropping my coffee. Nathan is sitting on my couch. He jumps up and runs over to me.

"Nathan what the, what are you doing here?" I ask. I sit up and he helps me up.

"Are you Okay?" He asks as we hug. Oh this boy.

"You scared the shit out of me," I say and he smiles.

"I'm sorry baby," he says and kisses my head.

"Oh my god, you are here! What are you doing here?" I ask him and hug him again. It just hit me that he's really here.

"Well when we talked on the phone and said I wouldn't see you till May it bummed me out. So since the team has a week off I came here to see you," he says and I smile.

"Oh my gosh, you are really here," I say. I can't even believe it.

"How did you? Who let you in? Did Olivia know?" I ask him.

"Yeah that's why she's staying at Tjs this weekend," he says and I smile.

"Oh my gosh I owe her one. What were you going to do about Maisy?" I ask.

"That was just pure luck that she was gone," he says and I laugh.

"Well I just got back from class as you can see and got myself a coffee," I say.

"Did you eat? I'm starving you have no food in this place," he says and I laugh.

"Yeah It was Maisy's week to grocery shop," I say and he nods looking at our chore chart.

"It also was your week to do the dishes," he says and points to the pile of dishes that need put away.

"Hey I'm working on it," I smile.

"I'll do that now," I say and start loading the dishwasher. I feel a hand sneak around my waist.

"Why don't we do something else?" He says and I smile.

"Like what?" I ask.

"Here," he puts his hands on my hips and lifts me up onto the counter.

He puts his hands on my thighs and starts kissing me. I start kissing him back harder. My hands go into his hair. I tug it a bit. His hands slide up my body and my shirt to find my chest.

I moan into his mouth as he teases me. I can barely take it anymore. "Bedroom," I say against his lips. He lifts me up under my thighs and walks into my room.

He lays me on my bed and pulls off his shirt. He gets on top of me and we start kissing again. His hands find the hem of my shirt and pull it off me.

"God you are so beautiful," he says as he starts to kiss my neck and down. He goes down to my leggings and pulls them off. Not the sexiest attire but I think we are past that.

I keep kissing him and he pulls off my panties. "Let's try something new today," He says into my ear as his fingers slip inside of me.

"What," I moan out as my back arches as he hits that one spot.

"Get on your hands and knees and face away from me," he says and I blush.

I do as he says and feel so exposed. His hand travels down my back and he puts his hands on my hips. He lines himself up with me and pushes himself inside of me. Oh this is weird and different.

"Fuck," I moan out. It is different but it feels so good.

"Ahh Nathan," I say as he starts pushing in and out.

"You're so tight," he says into my ear.

He holds my hips and keeps slamming into me. Finally we both start to build and finish at the same time. I lay flat on my belly as Nathan cleans the both of us up.

"Was that okay?" He asks.

"Okay? That was more than okay," I say and he smiles.

"I'm hungry," Nathan says as he comes back into my room.

"Well let's go eat then," I say.

We walk out and I grab my purse. We head out to the bagel deli down the street. The best bagels in the world. We get a seat by the window and wait for our food.

"How long are you here for?" I ask him.

"Til Sunday night, my flight leaves at 8 pm," he says and I smile.

"I can't believe you are here," I say.

"I am so happy to be here," he says. "What are we going to do?" He asks.

"Tomorrow we have a formal, I'm sure Olivia told you and that's why Andrew blew me off for it," I say and he smiles.

"Guilty, I'm excited," he says.

"Me too, oh my goodness," I say.

The rest of the lunch is spent talking about our plans and what we are going to do tomorrow. We eat and enjoy then head back to the apartment for some much needed chill out time.

_**APRIL **_

It's our April first formal! I don't know where the tradition started, but I love it. I am wearing a tight blue dress that is short and laces up in the back. My parents definitely wouldn't approve.

Right now I am curling my hair. Nathan is sitting on my bed and watching me. We have my room window open and the breeze feels amazing.

"You're hair is so long," he says.

"I know I need to get it cut," I say and he laughs.

"What," I ask.

"You have been saying that since junior year of high school," he says and I shrug.

"It'll happen one day," I say and he smiles.

After I finish curling my hair, I have to do my makeup. For this formal I'm just doing a natural look. Nathan sits watching me and after I'm done he smiles.

"You look absolutely stunning," he says and I smile.

"Thank you," I say.

I slip on my dress and put on my heels. Olivia and TJ are in the kitchen drinking already. Nathan is in his suit and looks so hot.

"Hey guys," Liv says.

"Hey you look stunning," I say and she smiles.

"Speak for yourself," she says. I give TJ a hug.

"Hey Pheebs," he says.

"Hey TJ, this is my boyfriend Nathan Moore," I say and they shake hands.

"Hey man, I'm TJ," he says and they talk. Olivia makes us both drinks. She hands me mine and I thank her. I grab Nathan a beer from the fridge and open it for him. He kisses my head and thanks me.

"Well should we head over to the hotel?" Olivia asks. This formal is at the heathman hotel.

"Yep the Uber is two minutes away," TJ says.

We lock up the apartment and head down. We Uber to the heathman hotel where they gave us hotel rooms and the main lounge for the formal.

We walk in and get escorted down to the lounge. It is so nice in here. The music is loud and I can already tell the liquor is being poured. I get a sex on the beach drink which Nathan makes fun of me for and he gets another beer.

We walk out and I spot Caroline. She smiles and walks over to us. She gives us both big hugs and lots of love. "Oh my gosh it is so good to see you guys. Phoebe I swear I've seen more of your brother than you," she says and I laugh.

"I know I've been so busy, how is he?" I ask her.

"Amazing as usual. Trying to plan when I can come visit you in the summer," she says.

"Nathan, it's good to see you too. When did you get here?" She asks.

"Just yesterday actually, I about scared the crap out of Phoebe when she was walking inside her apartment," he says and I laugh.

"Did you not know he was coming?" She asks and I shake my head no.

"Well for heaven's sake, Moore. You are good," she says and I laugh.

"Okay I need to go get myself another drink. I will see you two later," she says and I smile. She walks off and leaves Nathan and Me. We go to a standing table and talk.

"This is so nice," he says.

"This is where my parents spent their first night together," I say.

"Ew why do you know that?" He asks. Oh lord he thinks I meant… ew gross.

"Okay ew get your head out of the gutter. No my mom went to WSU and she got super drunk and called my dad and he had to come pick her up. He took her back here and had to take care of her," I say and he smiles.

"Well is that isn't a love story I don't know what is," he says and I sip my drink.

"You are very right my friend," I say and all of a sudden I feel two arms wrap around me.

"Hey stranger," I hear Andrew's voice.

"Hey long time no see," I smile. He comes over and greets Nathan.

"It's good to see you, man," Andrew says.

"Good to see you too, how's life been?" Nathan asks.

"It's been good, lots of applying for internships and studying, but I can't complain. How is New Jersey?" Andrew asks.

"It's great, lots of studying too. Basketball season is over and I'm just ready for summer," he says and I smile.

"Me too, I'll have to come and visit you guys," he says and we both nod.

"Yes, come to Seattle. It would be so much fun," I say.

"Yes you could stay with either of us," Nathan says.

"And you two need to make the drive to Portland," Andrew says.

"Oh my gosh, my dad is there like once every month. We could totally come visit," I say.

"That would be fun," Nathan says.

"You guys could meet all my high school friends," he says.

"We will have to figure out a date, Nathan you'd love Portland's hiking," he says.

"What about me?" I ask. They look at me and laugh.

"I hate you both," I smirk.

"No you don't, Grey," Andrew says.

"Yeah yeah, well I need another drink I'll be right back," I say.

"Here let me come with you," Nathan says.

"I'm fine, babe. I'll be right back," I say and he eyes me.

I walk over to the bar leaving Nathan and Andrew to talk. I order a sex on the beach and feel someone looking at me. I look over and see Cole. The guys who told me he had a long distance girlfriend when really he was just trying to get with me.

I look back to the bartender and ignore him. I get my drink and before I can walk back to Nathan I bump into a chest. I look up and see Cole.

"Phoebe, so good to see you," he says. "You look so nice," he says.

"Thanks," I say and he smiles.

"So I think I owe you an apology," he says and I laugh.

"You think," I say.

"Look, I was under the influence of drugs and all sorts of things. I never meant to hurt you," he says and I sigh. Maybe it's the liquid courage getting me to be so brazen.

"Look, we will never be friends after what happened. You tried to take advantage of me and pretend you knew about what I was going through," I say.

"And for that I am sorry," he says.

"I appreciate your apology, now if you'll excuse me," I get cut off by Nathan wrapping a hand around my waist.

"Hi I was just coming over to you," I smile.

"I'm Cole Harrison," he reaches his hand out to Nathan.

"Nathan Moore," they shake hands and this is probably one of the most uncomfortable I've ever felt.

"Nice to meet you, Nathan. You go to Princeton?" He asks.

"Yeah, you go to WSU right," Nathan says and I take a big sip of my drink.

"Yes, I thought I recognized you though. You play basketball?" He says and Nathan nods.

"I do, so how do you know Phoebe?" Nathan asks. Oh this should be good.

"Uh well we met at a party a couple months ago," he says and I roll my eyes. I spot Olivia and Kendra talking.

"We should go say hi to Kendra, it was nice talking to you," I say and take Nathan's hand pulling him.

"Okay What the hell is up with that guy?" Nathan asks as we walk over to Kendra.

"He's a prick," I say and Nathan laughs.

"You have such a nice mouth," he says and I laugh.

"Nathan Moore, you snuck in here," Kendra says as she hugs him then me.

"Wow look at you, sexy mama," she says and I smile.

"Oh thank you," I say.

"Are you guys staying here tonight?" She asks us.

"Uhm we haven't decided. We have the apartment to ourselves so we may just go back there," I say and she smiles.

"You horndogs," she says

"Shut up," I say laughing. I really have to pee. I'm way drunker than I thought.

"I have to pee, I'll be back," I say.

"Go with her," Kendra says.

"I was planning on it, nice talking to you," he says. I take Nathan's hand and we fight our way through the crowd and go to the bathroom. It's a one person bathroom so we both just go in.

"Face that way," I say as he unzips my dress for me.

"On it," he says. He faces the wall and I go pee. I stand up and fix my underwear.

I flush the toilet and go wash my hands. As I'm fixing myself in the mirror Nathan comes up behind me.

"You look beautiful," he says and I laugh.

"You do," he says.

"I'm way too drunk for my own good," I say and he laughs.

"That should be your last drink," he says and kisses my neck.

"Mmm we'll see," I say.

We walk out of the bathroom to a girl who just smirks at us. I take Nathan's hand and he walks out with me. We go over to the bar area.

"Let's do shots," I say.

"Are you nuts?" He asks.

"Maybe, what are you chicken?" I ask him and he glares.

"You're on," he says and I laugh.

"Can we have 4 tequila shots?" I ask him.

Nathan and I each take one and a lime. "Cheers to you, Ms. Grey," he says and I smirk. We clink our glasses and down a shot. I suck on the lime and shake my head. Ugh.

"This one is for you, Mr. Moore," I say and we cheers and down the second shot.

After shots we go to the dance floor. We dance for awhile and I end up taking my shoes off. I am so drunk. It is so much fun though. At around 3 in the morning people start heading off to their hotel rooms.

"Should we have Sawyer take us?" I ask him.

"Yeah let's get out of here," he says and I laugh. We go to Sawyer's car and he drives us to my apartment. We thank him and head upstairs.

"I can't get my key in," I laugh.

"Oh lord," Nathan says and takes it and opens it. I sit on the couch trying to undo my shoes which Nathan ends up coming to help me do. I lay on the couch and Nathan brings over water.

"Drink this," he says and I take it gladly drinking it. After I lay back down on the couch.

"Come to bed," Nathan says.

"I'm fine here," I say.

"Come on," Nathan says and I shake my head. I feel him lift me up bridal style and I laugh. He puts me on my bed and takes off my dress.

I get under the covers and he kisses me and gets under with me.

"Sleep now," he says and I nod.

"I love you," I say.

"I love you more," he says.

—-

Nathan has been gone for a week now. I have started studying for exams because they are next week. I get done a week earlier than I was last year which is super nice.

Right now I am at The Brew studying for my psychology exams. Next year is the year that I really have to focus on where I want psychology to take me. I am really leaning towards child psychology.

Nobody knows yet, but I am going to meet with a child psychologist at the children's hospital in Vancouver. Sawyer of course knows because he is driving me, but besides that no one knows.

I leave Thursday at 8 am for the meeting. I am working on questions to ask her while studying. Multitasking at its finest. I have my iced coffee to keep me company and I am plowing through this stuff.

After hour four at the Brew I am officially exhausted and they are closing in 30 minutes. I shut my laptop and pack up. I walk out and start heading back to my apartment.

I get inside and head into my room. I take a quick shower and get into my pjs. I head into my room and start studying again. I hear my phone ring and look down and grab it.

"Hey dad," I say when I see he is calling.

"Bubs, how are you sweetheart?" He asks.

"I'm good, really good actually," I say.

"I'm so glad to hear that, what's been going on?" He asks.

"Well Nathan cape to visit last weekend and I'll be done with school next week," I say and I hear him laugh.

"Well that's always a cause for celebration isn't it," he says and I smile.

"Yes it is, so what's up?" I ask him.

"We haven't heard from you in awhile, I was calling to check in. You haven't forgot about us have you?" He asks.

"Are you kidding? You know I would never," I say and he laughs.

"Well we are talking about the girl who hid in the back of my car, so she could come to work with me," he says and I laugh.

"Oh my gosh not that story," I say and he laughs.

(Flashback Phoebe 6)

Christmas break is over and it is time to return to work. It is a very hard transition for me and for the kids, especially Phoebe. Ana is taking another week off, but I can't do that.

I am in my black Armani suit and tie. I walk downstairs and see Teddy eating pancakes. Ana is reading per usual and drinking her coffee. I walk over to her and kiss her.

"Hi handsome," she says and straightens my tie.

"Hi beautiful," I say. I kiss Teddy's head and ruffle his hair. My 9 year old is not amused by that.

"Hey Dad, when you get home from work tonight can we play catch?" Teddy asks me.

"Of course we can," I say as I sip my coffee. He smiles and takes another bite of his pancake.

"Phoebe is still sleeping?" She asks.

"She was when I went in there. She must be tired from all the playing yesterday," I say and my wife smiles. I played princesses for hours.

"I'll write her a note, then I have to go," I say.

Dear Bubs,

You must have been sleepy this morning! I have to go to work but when I get back we can play! I love you most, my sweet girl!

X- Daddy

I kiss my wife and son goodbye then grab my briefcase. I get into my Audi and put my briefcase in the front seat. I turn on my podcast and start heading to work. Traffic as usual is horrible.

I get to work in a half hour. I park in my spot and grab my briefcase heading upstairs. I get the usual hello Mr. Grey and welcome backs from my staff.

I greet Andrea with a smile and she thanks me for her Christmas gift. She is so helpful to me it is the least I could do. I go into my office and fire up my laptop preparing for the massive amount of work I have to do.

I have so many contracts that need read over and signed. I also have a massive amount of emails to respond to. My phone starts to ring and I see it is Mr. Davis. An important businessman on my new deal.

"Mr. Davis, how good to hear from you," I say.

We go over a contract he faxed me. All of a sudden my call is interrupted by Taylor calling me. Frustrated, I decline his call and continue with Mr. Davis.

A couple of minutes go by and Andrea starts to call my work line. I decline her call too. Is everyone trying to interrupt me today? I continue the deal and finally there is a knock on my door.

"Mr. Davis could you give me one minute?" I ask him. He says of course and I put him on hold.

"What?" I roar. This better be good.

"Mr. Grey, Taylor says there is something you need to come deal with in the parking lot," Andrea says. What in the hell is this.

"Can he not do it himself?" I ask her. She looks at a loss for words.

"Christ, I'll be down in 5 minutes," I say and she nods apologizing for interrupting me. This better be good if he is making me stop my work.

I apologize to Mr. Davis and schedule to finish the call at three. I head downstairs and enter the parking garage. I hear crying, not just any crying. Phoebe's crying.

"Taylor?" I run over to my car. I see phoebe sitting in the back of my car crying with Taylor standing over her. She is still in her pajamas and has her blanket with her.

"Phoebe?" I say. She runs to me and clings against my legs tightly. I bend down and pick her up and she grips onto me for dear life.

"What is going on?" I look to Taylor for answers. I am so confused.

"I was looking at the security cameras when your car alarm went off. I ran down here and saw your car door open. I also saw Phoebe hiding in the corner. I am assuming she hid in your backseat this morning after you came downstairs and drove here to work with you. Since your car is locked when she tried to get out it set the alarm off," Taylor says. I am shocked beyond belief. I have no words.

"Phoebe Grace Grey, is that true?" I ask her and she whimpers into my shoulder. She knows she is in trouble.

"Call and notify Ana please. I will bring her home after we talk in my office," I say and shut my car door. I can't believe this is happening. Today of all days too.

I take phoebe up to my office and she hides in my shoulder the entire time. I can't believe she did this. Not only is it unsafe for her to not be buckled but if Ana went up to her room and she wasn't there she would have flipped out.

I set Phoebe down in one of the chairs in my office and I grab a tissue. I feel horrible that she is crying but I can't back down. I sit in a chair facing her and pull it close so we are face to face. I wipe her face off and sigh.

"Phoebe, did you hide in Daddy's car and sneak out of the house?" I ask her. She looks down at her legs and kicks them back and forth.

"Phoebe, look at me when I talk to you," I say. Her tear stained eyes peek up.

"Yes," She says.

"Do you know how unsafe and bad that is?" I ask her.

"I didn't- I didn't want you to leave, Daddy," she says.

"Phoebe, if I would have gotten into a car accident you would have been seriously hurt. You can't get into a car and not wear a seatbelt. And you know the rules about leaving the house. Sawyer or mommy or daddy has to be with you. They also have to know where you are. If mommy went upstairs to get you and say you weren't home she would have been worried sick. This was very bad," I scold her and she frowns.

"I'm so- sorry. I just wanted to be with you," she says and it takes everything out of me not to crack.

"Phoebe, you know daddy comes home whenever he works. I have to be gone for a couple of hours, but I always come home. You can't leave the house and try to come with me," I say and she cries.

"Phoebe, do you understand that what you did today was very bad?" I ask her.

"Yes I could have gotten hurt," she says and I nod.

"And mommy would have been very sad," I say.

"I don't want mommy to be sad," she says.

"I know, when we get home there will be no TV or iPad time, you also have to write Sawyer and mommy I'm sorry notes. And since you didn't sleep today, you are going to take a nap," I say. She nods and picks at her hands.

"Do I have to go home?" Phoebe asks. I sigh and pull her into my lap. She curls up against my chest and it is so hard to be stern.

"Yes you do, but we are going to wait til the morning rush hour is over," I say and she nods pretending like she understands. I take her over to my desk chair and rub her back. She must be exhausted. I see a nap in her future.

"That's me," she says as she points at the picture frame I have of her.

"That is you," I say. "I love that picture of you," I tell her. Her belly rumbles and I look down at her.

"Are you hungry?" I ask her and she nods. She didn't eat breakfast. I feel like such an idiot. I should have asked.

"Let's go get you breakfast," I say and she hops off my lap. She reaches for my hand and we walk out of my office. I take her down to the Starbucks in my building. She of course has to press the buttons in the elevator and is so proud of herself when she does. People smile and laugh as I walk by with my daughter in pajamas and rain boots.

"Okay come this way," I say and lead her into the Starbucks.

"Hi Mr. Grey, what can we get for you?" The woman working asks. I pick Phoebe up, and get her a cinnamon roll and myself a coffee.

"Thank you," Phoebe says. I smile and take her to a table. I sit across from her and give her the cinnamon roll.

"Thanks," She says and I smile. It's so hard to be mad at her. Even though what she did was so reckless.

"Daddy, what time do you get home?" She asks me. She is on her knees on the chair so she is propped up higher.

"I will be home by 6 tonight," I say and she holds up 6 fingers.

"How many hours is that?" She asks. I look at my clock and it is 9:30.

"About eight hours," I say and she frowns.

"That's too many hours, what about three hours?" She asks and I laugh. I wipe her face off with a napkin.

"That's not enough hours. Daddy has to do his job," I tell her and she frowns.

"But I miss you," she says and my heart melts.

"And I miss you, but Daddy always comes home and we eat dinner together and play outside after," I tell her.

"Can we do bubbles tonight?" She asks. Mia got her this special bubble blowing wand and she loves it.

"Of course we can," I say. She finishes up her food.

"Okay Bubs, let's get my keys from my office and get you home," I say.

"Do I have to go, Daddy? I can stay in your office and be super quiet," she says and I smile down at her. I pick her up on my hip and she lays her head on my shoulder.

"You have to go home, Bubs. I have to work," I say and she nods. I think she is content with the time she got while she was here.

We go up to my office and andrea gives her a big hug. As I explain the story she is trying to hold back her laughter. "Oh Phoebe Girl," she says.

I grab my keys and wrap Phoebe in my coat. She didn't bring her coat which isn't shocking. She would run outside in January with a dress on if we let her. She is our wild child.

I buckle her in her booster seat and go up front. I turn on her princess music and start driving. "Daddy, is mommy mad?" She asks me.

"Bubs, mommy is upset that you left the house without telling her or me. She also is upset that you didn't wear a seatbelt or sit in a booster. She knows we talked about it though, but you should still say sorry," I tell her and she nods.

We get to the house in no time. I get Phoebe out and we walk in. Ana is standing there with her hands on her hips and her mom face on. She looks so sexy. Phoebe looks down at her feet.

"Mommy, I am sorry I left the house without telling you," Phoebe says.

"You are never to do that again. Ever. You will be in big trouble," Ana says and Phoebe looks to me. I point to Ana, she isn't getting out of this one.

"I know, I'm sorry," Phoebe says and she goes over to Ana and wraps her arms around her. Ana bends down and takes Phoebe in her arms hugging her. I smile at Ana and she winks at me.

"Phoebe, Daddy has to go to work go say goodbye," Ana says.

She walks over and I bend down. "Bye Daddy, I love you," Phoebe says.

"Bye Bubs, I'll see you tonight," I say and kiss her head.

"I think I'm going to make mommy a sorry card, and bubbles tonight remember," Phoebe whispers in my ear.

"That's a good idea, and yes lots of bubbles tonight," I say and she laughs.

"Give me a kiss then I have to go," she does and I smile. She runs off to her art table and leaves Ana and me.

"Have an amazing day at work Mr. Grey," my wife says.

"Thank you Mrs. Grey, I'll see you tonight," I say and kiss her goodbye.

I head out and head back to work. I finished the day off and as promised play with Ted and do bubbles with Phoebe.

(End of flashback)

—

Today I have my meeting with the child psychologist at Vancouver Children's hospital. I am in a blouse and dress pants. This is the first time I feel like an adult. I grab my coffee cup and walk out the door.

I get in Sawyer's car and he turns and looks at me. "You are not a baby anymore," he says and I smile.

"I know I look too old in this outfit," I say and he laughs.

"You look more like an adult than a teenager," he says.

"Well I am 20," I say and he shakes his head.

"And I can't believe it," he says. Neither can I to be honest.

We start heading towards the hospital and I have my notebook out in front of me. I am reviewing the questions I have for her. It's a lot about the job and working in a hospital.

I'm quite nervous for this meeting. I want to be taken seriously, and look like I have an interest in the job. I reviewed my questions with my professor and she said they were all great questions.

We pull up to the hospital and I thank Sawyer. He wishes me luck and I get out. I take my coffee and my notebook and walk into the building. I go to the front and have to show my ID. I get a badge that I have to wear and get taken upstairs to a meeting room.

"Dr. Rook will be here soon," the nice woman says.

"Thank you so much," I say and she shuts the door.

I look through my questions one more time and get my pen ready, so I can write down all the answers to her questions. After about five minutes the door opens. I stand up and see a tall older woman.

"You must be Phoebe," she says.

"Hi Dr. Rook, it is so nice to meet you. Thank you for taking your time to meet with me," I say and she smiles.

"Oh dear, it's no problem. I am always willing to help the future of my career," she says and smiles.

We sit down and I let her get situated. She has her tea in a mug and a warm smile on her face. She reminds me of my grandma.

"So you have some questions I assume?" She says and I nod.

"Well ask away," she says.

"How easy was it for you to get a job in a pediatric hospital?" I ask her.

"Now this job came at the perfect time for me 30 years ago. I was fresh out of college and this hospital had just opened. They were looking for a qualified psychologist and I came in. I didn't get the job at first but I continued to pursue the career and the hospital. Eventually they saw my potential and gave in," she says and I write down her answer nodding.

"Now for you I do not think it should be too difficult. But you do have to be flexible about where you work. If you have your heart set on one place like me and they don't have any open positions it will take longer to get the job. As long as you are flexible the job will come to you," she says and I nod.

"What does a normal day look like for you?" I ask her.

"Well when I first get here I check if I have any new patients to visit. Usually, I have about one or two every couple of days. But I make my rounds to my patients and spend about an hour each with them. I have to plan what I am going to do in each session and then after help the doctors and nurses to ensure that the patient's care is the best it can possibly be. I also have to chart and document the sessions. Every Friday I have a meeting with the psychosocial services department. There usually is some meetings scattered in but besides that not much else goes on," she says and I nod.

"I assume you hear some pretty heavy stuff. How do you keep your mental health and positivity in check?" I ask her.

"It's all about self care. If you want to help the kids you have to be in the right state to do it. You have to make sure you are a hundred percent so they can get your full potential of a psychologist. I run a lot and drink tea. I read and relax when I need it," she says and I nod.

"What should I start doing now that I want to be a child psychologist?" I ask.

"I would start being around kids and volunteering as soon as you can. The more experience you have the better," she says.

"How many psychologists are there in the hospital?" I ask her.

"There are eight of us," she says. "We all work different shifts and floors," she says. "Soon we will need more." I nod and write that down.

"Who do you work with mostly in the hospital?" I ask her.

"I am around nurses a fair share because if I am with a patient sometimes they will come in and do a quick check or give them their medicine. I work with the doctors too, keeping them updated on the patient's mental health and how we can assure the best care. I also work with social workers if there is a case of neglect or abuse," she says and I nod.

"What is your schedule like?" I ask her.

"I am here Monday through Friday either 9-4 or 10-7," she says and I nod. That's not bad.

"Is there anything else I should know about the field?" I ask.

"It is amazing. My job is my pride and joy. These kids need friends and people to talk to that aren't coming to give them medicine or poke and prod at them. You seem like a good fit for this job," she says and I smile.

"I thank you for that, that means a lot to me," I say.

"Thank you so much for seeing me and taking time out of your day," I say.

"Of course. Please feel free to email me if you have any extra questions," she says and I shake her hand.

We part ways and I walk to Sawyer's car. "How did it go kid?" He asks.

"Well I know I want to be a child psychologist," I say and he smiles.

"I'm so proud of you," he says and I thank him.

Time to start working towards my goal.

—-

I just finished my last exam and now I am on my way home. I am so ready for summer. Sawyer has all my stuff packed up in his car. We are about 5 minutes from my house.

When we get home I tell sawyer that I am going to say hi before I get all my stuff out. I run inside and see my mom.

"Oh sweetheart, you look amazing," she says as we hug. I haven't seen her in two months.

"I missed you," I say.

"I know I missed you more," she says and I smile.

"Where's dad," I ask looking around.

"Some things never change," she says teasing me. "He is stuck at work said he should be home as soon as possible," she says and I nod.

"That's fine, I'm going to help Sawyer unload my stuff," I say.

"Oh I'll help too," she says.

We all go outside and start loading my into the house. I have way more stuff than I thought. As I put all my stuff away in my room I realized how much I missed it.

After an hour of unloading and organizing we are done. "Oh my goodness, let's all go get a drink," my mom says. We walk downstairs and she gets me an iced tea and Sawyer a coke. He excuses himself to go talk to Davis.

"So tell me how was the rest of the year?" She asks.

"It flew by but it was so good. Nathan came to visit at the end of last month and seeing him was so nice. It was just a really good year," I say and she smiles.

"You don't know how happy I am to hear that," she says. We both hear the front door open and my dad walks in.

"Bubs," he says. I smile and walk over to him giving him the biggest hug.

"You look way too thin, we need to get pizza tonight," he says and I shake my head laughing.

"It's nice to see you too," I tease him.

"When does teddy get home?" I ask.

"Not for another two weeks you are early this year," he says and I nod.

"I am very early. All my exams were the first week," I shrug.

"That's nice though. We get more time with you. When does Nathan come home," my dad asks.

"This Friday," I say and they smile.

On the front door there is a knock. I look to my parents and my mom palms her face. "Oh lord I forgot Rose was bringing over a manuscript for me she has the kids with her," I get so excited.

"No way let me hide and surprise them," I say ducking behind the counter.

"Hey guys," my mom opens the door.

"Is Bee Bee home?" I hear Spencer's voice and smile.

"Bee Bee Bee Bee," I hear Drew repeating Spencer. Oh my gosh he is almost 3 that blows my mind. Spencer is going to be five. Quinn is seven and Charlie is 8. It is so crazy how fast time flies. That makes me feel so old.

"I don't know why don't you guys go check?" My mom smiles.

I hear the pitter patter of feet and soon I am tackled by 4 kids. "Bee you're home," Quinn says. I smile and hug them all. I hear my parents and mrs. Cruz laughing.

"You guys are so big now," I say.

"I two," Drew holds up two fingers. I smile and grab him and lift him up kissing his belly.

"You are two. And you missy are going to be five?" I say and she laughs.

"I'm going to be in kindergarten," she says and I can't believe it.

"Who said you were allowed to turn 8?" I ask Charlie.

"Uhm God?" He says and we all laugh.

"Are you babysitting us this summer?" Spencer asks.

"Of course I am," I say and she smiles so big.

"Hey Rose, sense Jason is out of town, why don't you all stay over for dinner?" My mom asks.

"They are so picky it's really okay," mrs. Cruz says.

"We are ordering pizza," my mom smiles.

"No mom please," Charlie says. All the kids start begging.

"Fine fine, but what do you guys say to Mr. Christian and Ms. Ana," they all harmonize a big thank you. The boys ask to go play in the basement. They love it down there of course and my dad says yes.

"Spencer Cruz what am I chopped liver?" My dad asks her. She laughs and runs over hugging him.

"Did I hear you were turning 5?" He asks. She nods with a big smile.

"Oh my goodness," he says and she laughs. I see Drew and bend down picking him up. I bop his nose and he laughs.

"I can't believe he is almost three," I say to mrs. Cruz.

"I know, he's almost fully potty trained too," she says and I looked down with a wide open mouth at him and he giggles.

"I go pee pee on potty," he says and we all laugh.

"I won't have two in diapers like I had with him and Spencer," she says. My parents and I give her a weird look.

"What do you mean?" I ask. She quickly covers her mouth and shakes her head.

"Oh my gosh I wasn't supposed to say anything. We haven't even told the kids yet," she says. I look to my parents. Is she saying what I think she is?

"Are you?" My mom says and she nods.

"Oh my gosh, Rose," My mom hugs her.

"Congratulations," My dad and I say. I put Drew down and hug her.

"I know it's crazy and to be honest a big surprise," she says and unbuttons her jacket showing her tiny belly.

"How far along are you?" My mom asks.

"Fifteen weeks," she says and we smile.

"Are you going to find out the gender?" We ask.

"This time yes. I can't do another gender neutral nursery they are a pain," she says and we laugh.

"Bee, is Nathan home?" Spencer asks. Hearing her say Nathan instead of Natin breaks my heart.

"He is not. But you know what we could do?" I ask her.

"What?" She asks.

"FaceTime him," I say and she smiles.

"In your room?" She asks and I nod.

"Let's go do it," I say and take her hand.

"Up up," I hear a little pitter patter of feet behind me.

"Drew no," Spencer says. I smile and bend down picking him up.

"It's okay he can sit and watch while we FaceTime," I say and she takes my hand. We go into my room and I set drew on the bed with us. He sits between my legs playing with stuffed jaguar.

I call Nathan on FaceTime and he answers pretty quickly. "Hey baby," He says and Spencer grabs the phone.

"Nathan," She says and he looks surprised.

"Spencer Cruz, look how big you are," he says and I smile.

"Look at Drew," she says and I laugh. Nathan gasps.

"Hi buddy," I smile as Drew looks confused but waves anyway.

"You both have gotten so big," Nathan says.

"When will you be here?" Spencer asks.

"In a couple days, and when I get home I will have to come over with Bee," he says. Spencer claps.

"Can you draw with me?" Spencer asks him.

"Raw Raw," Drew holds up my leopard print skirt.

"Drew that's not a leopard silly it's just leopard print, it's in right now," she says making us laugh. Fashionista.

"Well Spence, I have to get back to studying," Nathan says. I smile as she blows him a kiss.

"Bee call me later," he says. I nod and blow him a kiss too. After we hang up I have Spencer and Drew on my bed.

"Pizza," my mom calls up the stairs.

"Let's go guys," I say. I pick up Drew and take Spencer's hand. We walk downstairs and eat pizza.

The rest of the night is spent hanging out and having lots of sweet talks. This is really feeling like summer.


	5. Chapter 5

Chapter 5

**(y'all I have been going through a really tough couple of months. I am not going to go into detail about what has been going on, but one word to describe it is tough. I know this chapter is only 3 months, but that is where I am starting to get back into the swing of things. Thank you all for understanding. You guys are the best.) **

_**SEPTEMBER **_

This year I am living in a house with Olivia, Maisy, and Kendra. It is a four bedroom and four bathroom house. We have a nice size kitchen and dining room. Our living room is nice too.

My bedroom and bathroom is straight across from Olivia's and down the hall is Kendra to the right and Maisy to the left. We live near the bars which is so nice. Not a long drunk walk home.

We got all moved in yesterday and said goodbye to our parents. So naturally, today we are having a house party. The place is party ready. We all went to the store last night and bought vodka, beer, and white claws. Luckily Olivia is already 21 she has a summer birthday like Nathan.

Speaking of Nathan, we had the best summer together. For his 21st birthday, I surprised him with a trip to my house in California. My parents I think have realized how much I love Nathan and how protect he is over me. They let us go just us and Sawyer.

It was my favorite weekend of the summer. He had no clue either. On his birthday, I woke him up at 5 am to tell him we were going.

(Flashback Nathan's 21st)

It is 5 am and I am walking up Nathan's stairs. His parents know and just gave me a key. I sneak into his room. I smile at the picture frame of us he keeps on his bed.

He is sprawled on his stomach asleep. He is only in his boxers and looks too hot. I smile and sit down on the bed. I run my hands through his hair.

"Nathan," I whisper. I scratch his back and all of a sudden he jumps and knocks me off his bed.

"Holy shit," he says and I am on the floor laughing.

"Oh my god, Bee. Are you okay?" He jumps out of bed and cups my face. I am dying laughing.

"I am fine, happy birthday," I say and wrap my arms around him hugging him to me. We lay on the floor hugging and I pull back and kiss him. He helps me up and I stand between his legs as he sits on his bed.

"Not that I don't love seeing you baby, but what are you doing here at 5 in the morning?" He asks.

"That's a great question, so for your birthday I was going back and forth on what to get you. And then I realized why would we want to be limited to staying here on your birthday. I decided that we needed to go to California. So um surprise we are going to California in an hour," I say and he looks shocked.

"Are you serious?" He asks.

"Yep," I say.

"Actually?" He asks.

"Uh huh," I say and he laughs.

"Oh my god, Bee. Thank you," he says and pulls me down to kiss him.

"You need to get packed," I say and he nods.

We spend the next half hour packing and then Nathan goes and gets ready while I lay in his bed. After he's done we head to Sea-tac.

We board the plane and sit across from each other. Sawyer is already there because he had to check the house. I smile as the flight attendant takes us through all of the procedures. When she is done we can lean our seats back and take off. Which we do.

I put my feet in Nathan's lap and he starts rubbing them. "I can't believe this is happening," he says.

"Is it a good surprise?" I ask.

"Do you even have to ask that?" He says and I laugh.

Once we are up in the air we get breakfast which today is oatmeal and toast. I steal a bite of Nathan's toast. "So you can legally drink now," I say.

"Yeah you're right," he says.

"Are you going to get drunk tonight?" I ask him.

"Not if you aren't drinking with me," he says and I smile.

"I will for sure," I say and he smiles.

The flight is not bad. We get there and Sawyer picks us up. When we get to the house we immediately put on our bathing suits and head outside. Luckily, there is a bottle of champagne and I bring it out and pour Nathan a glass.

"Happy 21st," I say and he takes a sip then pulls me in his lap.

"I love you so much, Phoebe Grey," he says and I smile. I cup his cheeks and kiss him.

"I love you more," I smile. He puts down his glass of champagne and picks me up.

"No no Nathan no," I laugh and he does it anyway. He jumps in the pool holding me. The water feels so good actually.

"I hate you," I laugh splashing him. I swim to where I can stand and fix my bathing suit top.

Nathan swims over to me and kisses my cheek. "I like this suit," he says and pulls at the line of my bikini top.

"Thank you, it was 10 dollars off amazon," I say and he smiles.

"Only you," he says and I smile.

"So for dinner tonight I made a reservation at this restaurant called Oh and apparently a very well known bartender works there," I say. "But if you don't wanna go there I can make a reservation at sushi palace or something," I say and he smiles.

"Bee, I am sure I will love whatever you picked out. You could take me to a dumpster tonight and I would be happy," he says.

"Really I'm sure I could arrange that," I say and he playfully splashes me.

We spend the rest of the afternoon laying out and playing in the pool. We shower and get ready for dinner. I curl my hair and wear a red wrap dress with platform shoes.

"You ready?" I ask Nathan and he smiles at me.

"Damn you are a smoke show," he says and I laugh.

"Shut up," I say.

We walk out and head over to Oh. It is a really cool vibe in there. I would describe it as rustic. We get seated at our table and the waiter puts drink menus down. I pass it to Nathan who reads it over.

"What are you going to get?" I ask him.

"I don't know what about you?" He asks.

"Nathan I can't order a drink here," I say. I have a fake ID, but that only works in the random bars on my campus.

"Yes you can, trust me I'll order first and he'll really check my ID," I sigh.

"Have you two decided on drinks?" The waiter asks as he puts down two water cups.

"I'll have a rosemary jalapeño gimlet," Nathan says.

"Very good and for the lady?" He looks at me.

"Oh um I'll get a skinny cucumber drop," I say.

"Very well, I'll get those right out," he says and walks away.

"Oh my god he didn't even ID us," I say and he

smiles.

"Hey when in California," he smiles.

The waiter brings back our drinks and they are both so fancy. I smile and thank him.

"Cheers my love," I say and Nathan clinks my glass.

"Cheers to you," He says. Oh this boy gets better everyday.

(End flashback)

I have to finish getting ready for the party, but that thought made me smile. I hear Maisy and Kendra laughing in her room and I smile. I'm so excited for this year.

…..

I am waiting to hear back from my internships for next summer. I applied for a bunch with children's hospitals near me. I am so nervous, so to get my mind off of it I am finally getting to decorating my room.

My room is pretty big. Bigger than the one at my apartment. And I need to fill it. Right now I only have a mattress and desk. Usually I do all the shopping before but this year was different due to the IKEA opening up in Vancouver.

When I first get to ikea, I look for a bedframe. My mattress is on the floor. My dad told me my room resembled a prison cell. I know I want my bedframe and headboard to be simple because my walls are a deep grey.

I finally find a smooth leather light grey headboard. I decide on that and move on to sheets. I want white sheets with hints of grey and mauve. I buy the soft white sheets and get a big white duvet. I then get a mauve fuzzy blanket and some mauve decorative pillows.

Now that my bed is out of the way I want to get stuff for my walls and to put on my desk. I get two white lamps for my bedside tables and some bronze decor to put on my desk.

It's all really coming together. I get the picture frames so I can put pictures of Nathan and my friends up. I grab a rug and a bench to put in front of my bed and call it a day.

As I'm checking out I look down at my phone. A random number is calling me and my stomach drops. I look at Sawyer and he tells me to go outside and he'll finish paying.

"Hello?" I answer the phone.

"Hi there may I speak to a Phoebe Grey?" A woman asks.

"This is," I say. I am so nervous I know what this call is about.

"Hi there this is Doctor Vanessa Greene from Bellevue Children's hospital, I am calling about the summer internship you applied for," she says.

I applied to Vancouver children's hospital, Seattle Children's Hospital, and Vancouver. Seattle would be the most convenient due to it being so close to my house. Vancouver would be a drive. But Bellevue is only 20 minutes away.

"We would like to congratulate you on getting an internship in the psychology department. If you accept this internship you will begin May 30th. It will go throughout the summer and end August 8th. You need to call and let us know if you will be accepting the internship by next Wednesday. Do you have any questions?" She asks. It is taking everything I have not to jump up and down and scream. These internships are so competitive.

"No I do not have any questions. Thank you so much for offering this to me," I say.

"Well congratulations, Ms. Grey, we hope you consider our offer," she says. After we bid each other goodbye I start to jump up and down.

I turn to see Sawyer with the cart of stuff and he smiles when he sees me. I jump into his arms as he congratulates me. "Phoebe I am so proud of you," he says.

"Thank you, oh my gosh," I say smiling.

"So are you going to take it?" He asks as we walk to the car.

"I don't know yet. It depends if Seattle children's says yes or no," I say. I am on cloud 9 right now.

"Well you have to call your parents and tell them," he says and I nod.

"I know I will when we get back to the house," I say and he smiles.

When we get back to the house I take all my stuff upstairs. Andrew is there and helps me with all the building of the head board and the bench. After we do that we test out the bed. We both lay back on it and he looks at me.

"What's up with you, Grey? Why do you seem extra chipper? Usually you would have insulted me by now," he says and I laugh.

"Well know that you say it. I got a call today," I say and he smiles. We both sit up.

"And?" He asks.

"I got the internship at Bellevue children's hospital," I say and he jumps up. He pulls me up and hugs me spinning me around.

"Phoebe, oh my gosh. They only had one spot with 500 applicants. I am so proud of you," he says.

"I know," I say.

"Have you told anyone yet? Have you screamed it from the rooftops?" He asks I laugh and shake my head.

"You're the second person that knows," I say and he laughs.

"I am so fucking proud of you, I don't know what to do," he says.

"Well you can help me make my bed," I say and he laughs.

We start putting on the sheets and I fold the blankets and lay them on the bed. Finally it is starting to look like a room. Andrew has class so he has to go, but i stay and continue decorating. Finally, when my room is all done I fall into the bed.

My phone starts to ring and I quickly get up and grab it. "Hello?" I say.

"Is this Phoebe Grey?" I hear a voice ask.

"Speaking," I say.

"Hi Phoebe, this is doctor Amanda Hughes from Seattle Children's Psychology department," my stomach drops.

"Hi there," I say.

"I am calling to inform you that you did not get accepted into our internship program," I hear her say. A wave of sadness rushes over me.

"Thank you for calling and letting me know," I say.

"If you would like to apply again for the fall internship the applications open November 20th," she says and I can't help but feel bummed out.

We bid our goodbyes and I put my phone down. I don't know why I feel sad. I have an internship at Bellevue. I guess I was just hoping I could get into both.

I sigh and pick up my phone and FaceTime Nathan. It rings for awhile and then he picks up. "Hey baby, can I," he stops talking when he sees my face.

"Oh Bee, what's going on?" He asks.

"I didn't get the internship from Seattle Children's," I say and he sighs.

"Oh baby, don't be sad. If they can't see how great you would be, then they don't deserve you," he says and I nod.

"And you still have two others. Seattle Children's wasn't meant to be and that's okay. Doesn't mean you can't apply for a job there," he says and I nod.

"I know it just sucks," I say and he frowns.

"I wish I could come kiss you," he says.

"Oh you don't know the half of it," I say and he smiles.

"Well tell me one good thing that happened today," he says.

"I got the internship from Bellevue Children's," I say. He looks so confused.

"Wait… then why are you sad about Seattle Children's?" He asks and I shrug.

I'm "I don't know," I say.

"Everything happens for a reason, Baby," He says and I shrug.

"I just wanted to get both," I say.

"I'm so proud of you," he says and I smile.

"Thank you," I say.

"Now no more being sad, I love you," he says.

"Thank you, now what were you doing?" I ask.

"Having a meeting with my professor," he says.

"Nathan why are you answering this then, hang up," I say and he laughs.

"You will always be more important baby," he says and I smile thanking him.

"I love you," I say.

"I love you more," He says.

…

"We look forward to seeing you in the summer, Ms. Grey," Doctor Greene says.

I just called and let Bellevue children's hospital know that I will be doing their internship program. I am so excited and ready to do it. My parents were so proud. I think my mom cried. Maybe my dad did too.

I walk downstairs and see Olivia and TJ making out. "Oh god," I say and turn around.

"Shit, I didn't know you were home," Olivia says and hops off the kitchen table.

"Tables are for glasses not for asses," I say and she starts laughing. TJ blushes and takes a sip of his water.

"Jesus Grey, you and your little sayings," she says.

"Hey TJ," I say.

"Hey Pheebs, how is the internship applications going?" He asks. He was there last week when Vancouver children's told me I got accepted into their internship program.

"Good, actually I just called and committed to doing Bellevue Children's hospital," I say.

"What no way," Olivia runs over and hugs me.

"What's happening?" Maisy walks in.

"Phoebe is doing her internship at Bellevue," Olivia says.

"Holy shit," Maisy hugs me.

"Okay gosh we have so much to do now," Maisy says.

"What do you mean?" I ask her.

"What do you mean, what do I mean? We are throwing you a party for this. This is huge," she says and I shake my head.

"That's really not necessary," I say.

"Oh shut up, okay I'm on people duty obviously, Olivia you need to get cups and trash bags, Phoebe take andrew with you and go get booze," she says.

"Oh and Kendra will be on house cleaning duty, TJ you help her with that and start doing the dishes. Okay break," she runs off and we all stand there dumbfounded.

"Okay… well I'm going to go see if andrew wants to get booze with me," I say.

I took my car to school this year because junior year you are allowed. I get in my car and head over to Andrew's apartment. I knock and he opens it.

"Hey Grey," he says.

"Hey, we are having a party tonight wanna come get booze with me," I say and he smiles.

"Sure let me put shoes on," he says.

"Thanks," I say and he smiles. He comes out and gets into my car.

We head over to the liquor store and andrew goes in. He is 21 already so he goes in and gets us vodka, beer, and hard seltzer. On my card of course.

After we head back to my place. Andrew helps me carry the brown paper bags full of alcohol upstairs. When we walk in, the apartment is in party mode. Our dining room table is covered in plastic so it doesn't get ruined. The rug is rolled up. The couches are covered too.

"Here set that on the table," Maisy says. We smile and do as she says.

"Okay Grey go shower and get ready, I laid out an outfit for you on your bed," she says and I laugh.

"Okay mom," I say and she points to the stairs

I thank Andrew one last time then head upstairs and start my shower. It feels so good to shower and shave. After my shower, I wrap my towels around myself and moisturize my body.

I head out and check out the outfit that Maisy left me. It's black jeans and a bralette with a floral mesh shirt to go over it. It is so cute. Good job Maisy.

I keep on my robe while I blow dry and straighten my hair and do my makeup. I put on some lip gloss and then get dressed. After I'm dressed, I put on a simple necklace and a ring.

I head downstairs and see that Maisy has gotten balloons that say congratulations on them. She really does care so much about me. It is so sweet.

"Oh my gosh, Phoebe. You look amazing," she says and I hug her.

"Thank you so much for this," I say and she shakes her head.

"Of course, Grey," She says and I smile.

"You really are the best," I say and she laughs.

"This is fun for me Grey, I love to party," she says. I laugh and shake my head.

People start coming in a half hour later. Maisy made me a drink and is trying to force alcohol down my throat. She keeps telling me this is my night. She is so funny.

I have had so many people come up and congratulate me. It's actually so sweet. I walk over to Caroline. Her and Teddy broke up peacefully over the summer. They are now just really good friends.

"Hey Grey," She says smiling. "I am so proud of you," she says as she wraps me in her arms.

"Thank you so much you are the best," I say and she laughs.

"How's that brother of yours?" She asks.

"In law school now," I say and she smiles.

"I'm proud of him," she says.

"Yeah me too," I smile.

Maisy comes over and pulls me away. She makes me another drink and I look at Olivia who is watching us laughing.

This night has been so much fun and I am so excited for this year. It is going to be such a good year.

…..

Ava is coming to visit today and I am so excited. She has fall break this week so she is coming to stay with me. I have a bed set up for her in my room and we are planning to go out tonight.

She is meeting me at the house and should be here any minute now. I am so excited to see her.

"Hey when's Ava getting here?" Kendra asks as she does the dishes.

"Should be here any second," I say checking my Apple Watch.

"Are you excited?" She asks.

"Oh I am so excited," I say.

"Should be fun, we are going to sigma chi tonight right?" She asks and I nod.

"Oh she's in for a treat then," she says.

"I know, is everyone going out?" I ask.

"Yeah I think so. I know Liv had some big project so hopefully she makes it," she says and smiles.

"Yeah hopefully," I say.

Just as I say that there is a knock on the door. I smile and run to open it. I get wrapped in a huge hug from my blonde cousin.

"Oh my god, I missed you," I say as I hug her.

"I bet I missed you more," she says and I smile.

"Well come in," I say and she smiles.

"Oh my gosh this place is so cute," she says.

"When it's clean it is," I laugh.

"Hey Ava," Kendra says and gives her a hug.

"Hey kendra how are you?" Ava asks.

"Good, excited to have you here," she smiles. "It was so good to see you, but I have to run by Chase's," she says and I wink at her as she leaves.

"I take it Chase is the boyfriend?" Ava asks.

"Something like that," I smile.

"So how are you update me," I say as I pass her a water.

"Oh my gosh, good. I've just been hanging out and doing my designing,``she says. Ava has a during the school year internship.

"And I heard you got your internship, congratulations bitch," she says and I smile.

"Oh thank you," I smile.

"I mean that's great, you are going to love it," she says.

"Hopefully," I laugh.

"So how is Tyler?" I ask her. I knew they talked a bit over the summer.

"He has a girlfriend at U of M. I am happy for him. We definitely were just a high school thing,"

she says and I smile.

"Hey that's fine. You'll find a guy, maybe a California surfer," I say and she laughs.

"Hopefully a California surfer," she says and I smile.

"So you look already I just need to change," I say.

"Let me go upstairs and do that you just chill here I'll take your bag up," I say and she thanks me.

I go upstairs and change into a pair of jeans and a crop top. I reapply some makeup and brush out my hair. I brush my teeth then head downstairs.

When I come down I hear a familiar voice. It's Andrews and he has Ava laughing. I walk down and smile. "Hey Grey," he says and I smile.

"Hey dude," I say and side hug him.

"I see you met Ava," I say.

"I've met Ava before, but you never told me she was this funny," he says and I shrug.

"She's alright," I tease her.

"So are you riding with us?" I ask him.

"Sure, can we pregame here though?" He asks and I nod. I go in the fridge and Toss him a beer. I grab vodka from our cabinet and make Ava and myself a drink.

"You're the best bartender," Ava says as she sips her drink.

"So Andrew when do you find out if you got the Grey internship or not?" Ava asks him.

"Mr. Grey is coming to announce the winners next week," he says and I palm my forehead.

"Shit, I totally forgot. He wants to have dinner, thank you for saying something," I say. I put in a good word for Andrew in with my dad. Not that he would make the decision solely on that. But it never hurts.

"Do you know who got it, Phoebe?" Andrew asks. I shake my head no.

"He doesn't tell me that kinda stuff," I say and he smiles.

"Well if I get it then I'm coming to Seattle for the summer," he says and I smile.

"That would be so much fun," I say and he nods.

"Better hope I get it," he smirks.

We keep drinking the night away and finally head out to the frat house. When we get there I go to the bar with Ava and we get drinks.

"Grey," I hear someone yell.

"It's James, who lives next door to Andrew.

"Oh my gosh hey," I say and hug him.

"You look nice," he says and I smile. He is so flirty.

"Thanks, and oh this is my cousin Ava. She goes to San Diego," I say.

"Nice to meet you, I'm James," he says and shakes her hand. I can tell Ava is swoon. Too bad he is dating Carly.

"Hi I'm Ava," she says and bats her eyelashes. I can see right through her.

"Nice to meet you, Ava. So you go to San Diego? How do you like Vancouver?" He asks.

"It's cold, but you guys know how to party," she smiles as she looks around.

"Hey babe, oh my gosh Phoebe I haven't seen you in forever," I hug Carly after she kisses James. I see the green monster in Ava come out.

"I know, Carly this is my cousin Ava," I say and she smiles.

"Nice to meet you," Ava says.

"We are going to get another drink, so good to meet you guys," Ava says. She pulls me along as I wave.

"Bitch," Ava says.

"She did nothing," I laugh and Ava shakes her head.

"I see right through her," I shake my head.

"Woah grey and grey, why the long face?" Andrew says and I laugh. I look to Ava.

"Nothing," She says and I smirk.

"Pheebs, get your ass over here," Caroline yells.

"I'll uh stay with Ava you go," Andrew says and I give him a weird look. Why does he want to stay with her so bad?

"Okay, have fun you two I'll be back," I say.

I head over to Caroline who gives me the biggest hug. "What's up you bitch?" Caroline says hugging me.

"Oh nothing just hanging out," I smile.

"Let's do shots," she says and takes my hand. We go to the bar and Caroline lines us up shots

Next thing I know I'm 6 shots in. Fuck Ava. "Shit Caroline I have to find Ava," I say and hug her goodbye.

I can't find them anywhere, so finally I ask Maisy. "Oh shit I forgot to tell you, they left together and told me to tell you that Ava didn't feel well," I close my eyes. Jesus.

"They are totally fucking," Maisy says. She laughs as I close my eyes. I love that she doesn't care at all. I mean andrew is her ex after all.

"Okay well let's screw around the rest of the night," I say.

The rest of the night is so much fun. I come home at about 3 am. When I walk in I find Ava and Andrew passed out on the couch. I'm sure they did more than just sleep on that couch. I shake my head and walk up to my room. I fall into bed and fall asleep.

_**OCTOBER **_

My dad is coming to campus today to announce the people who got the internship. There are only two of them and he refuses to tell me who it is. I am really hoping that it is Andrew.

I am cleaning the house right now. We had a party last night and it got messy. The floors are covered in beer and sticky drinks. I am moping right now and singing the Mamma Mia soundtrack.

"Morning Cinderella what are you doing?" Maisy asks laughing at my singing and cleaning.

"My dad is coming today and wants to see the house," I say as she drops a piece of her chips on the floor.

"Seriously," I say.

"Don't get your panties in a twist," she says as she picks it up.

After I finish mopping, I begin to wipe down the sticky counters. I also put all the alcohol away and clean out the fridge and restock it. The house is starting to look like a house again.

College really has gotten the best out of this house. I hear a knock on the door and head towards the front. I open the door to my dad standing there with a smile.

"Bubs," He says.

"Hi, come on in," I say and open the door for him. When he walks inside he gives me a huge hug.

"You look amazing, Bubs," he says and I smile.

"Oh thank you," I say.

"Do you want anything to drink?" I ask him as we walk into the kitchen

"No I'm good," he says as he walks around. He sits down on the couch and I sit down joining him.

"It's so good to see you," He says.

"I know, it's so good having you here," I smile.

"So when do you announce the internships?" I ask him.

"Tomorrow at 10," he says and I nod.

"So are you going to tell me who got them yet?" I say. He smirks at me and laughs.

"No I am not, Bubs," he says and I smile.

"Well I'll still love you," I say and he laughs.

"So update me, what's up with you?" He asks. I look around and smile.

"I'm just really happy, I'm so excited for my internship, and school is going well," I say and he smiles.

"That makes me happier than you could know, how is Nathan?" My dad asks.

"Really good, he is just getting ready for basketball season," I say and my dad smiles.

"Well have to go to his game against Washington," he says and I nod.

"Yeah I'll drive up for it," I say and he smiles.

"I can't believe you are living in a house and are getting internships. It seems like just yesterday you were a sophomore in high school upset about your ACT score, now you've been in a relationship for what almost 5 years and are going to be graduating college next year," he shakes his head.

"Oh my gosh that stupid test," I say.

"Ah yes, you were a nut," I laugh as my dad says this.

(Flashback Christian's POV)

Ana left today for a book tour stop in California. She is staying at our house there for the weekend, so I have Phoebe and Ted. Ted is a senior this year and Phoebe is a sophomore.

It is Friday and I am home early. The kids just got back from school and are walking in. "Hey guys," I say. They look confused that I am home.

"Hey dad, what are you doing home so early?" Ted says. Phoebe is just quiet.

"Well since mom is gone I thought I'd be here when you get home," I say.

"Oh that's nice," Ted shrugs. Feeling the love from my 18 year old.

"So how were your days? Are you guys hungry?" I ask them. Phoebe walks upstairs without saying a word. That is weird.

"No, I'm good. But can I go to Grant's tonight. Maria and her friends are going over," Ted asks.

"Sure, but please no drinking or drugs," I say and he laughs.

"Dad come on, we are 18, we don't do that stuff," he says.

"You really think I was born yesterday don't you? I mean it no alcohol. Now can you tell me what's going on with your sister?" I ask him.

"I don't know, she was super quiet on the way home. I tried to talk to her and she just kind of nodded," he says. "Should I go talk to her?" He asks. Oh how sweet it is to see how protective he is of her.

"No you go get ready for Grant's, I'll go talk to her," I say.

"Okay thanks Dad," he says and smiles. I decide to make Phoebe some tea. It is freezing out and maybe will make her more open and comfortable to talk to me.

I head upstairs and knock on her door. I wait for a second and get no reply. I knock again and call out her name. Still no answer. By the third time I am getting worried. I reach above the door frame and grab the key. I let myself in and see that she is on her patio. Oh my god. It is 20 degrees out. I open the patio door.

"Phoebe, what the hell are you thinking?" I say angry that she doesn't have a coat or a blanket on.

"Please just leave me alone," she says and I can hear in her voice that she is crying.

"Bubs, come inside. I'm sorry I snapped at you," I sigh. She turns and comes inside. I get a glimpse of her face and see that she is crying.

She sits down on her bed and I hand her the tea. She thanks me and sips it before putting it down. I want nothing more than to hug her and hold her till everything is better. But I know the older she gets the less that works.

"Can you tell me what's going on?" I ask her gently.

"You're going to be so disappointed in me," she says and my heart drops.

"Bubs, I could never," I say and she shakes her head and starts to cry more. I can't help it and I stand up and take her in my arms. She hugs me tightly. I kiss her head and rub her back.

"Let me help you, sweetheart. Tell me what's going on," I say and she sighs.

"I got a 27 on my ACT," she says and I look at her waiting to finish.

"And?" I say and she says that's it. She is SO hard on herself.

"Bubs, I am so proud of you," I say. I give her the biggest hug and she looks confused.

"Why?" She asks. Oh this girl.

"A 27 is so good," I say and she shakes her head.

"29 is the average for university of Washington," she says and I shake my head.

"Bubs, that was your first time taking it and you didn't study. This was just your baseline. Imagine taking it with study," I say and she wipes her tear filled eyes.

"Teddy got a 30 the first time he took it," she says.

"And that's Teddy. You are Phoebe. You're mom and I don't compare you two," I say.

"I know, but he did so much better than me," she says.

"Who cares? We are so proud of you, Bubs. I got a 19 the first time I took the ACT," I say and her eyes bug out of her head.

"You did?" She asks.

"Yes and then I worked my butt off and got it up to a 35," I tell her.

"It doesn't matter what you get your first time or even your last time. It matters how hard you work. You have your entire summer and junior year to work on this test, Bubs. Teddy and your mom and I will help you. We can even get you a tutor if you would like," I say and she smiles.

"I thought you were going to be so upset with me," she says through teary eyes.

"I will never be upset with you for trying your best," I say and she wraps her arms around me tightly.

"Now how about you and I get a celebratory dinner and ice cream?" I ask her.

"Really?" She asks.

"Of course," I smile.

"You can drive too," I say and she laughs. She just got her license and loves driving everywhere.

"Thank you, Dad. I love you so much," she says.

"I love you most, Bubs," I tell her.

(End flashback)

—-

Today my Dad announces who got the internship in the business program. He's announcing in the schools main auditorium. I just sat down in the back and am observing all the students nervously awaiting his speech.

I sit in the back, one because I know people know he is my dad. And so no one tries to come and talk to me. I turn my phone on silent and watch as the crowd turns silent as the dean walks on stage.

"Welcome students, it is my great honor to present Mr. Christian Grey," everyone claps as my dad walks on stage and shakes the dean's hand.

My dad gives a long speech talking about perseverance and how he once was sitting right where we are. He talks about the importance of business and working hard. He is such a good public speaker. Both my parents are really.

"And it is my pleasure to announce that Maria Lopez has gotten the first internship spot. I look out to the crowd and see the girl walking up to the stage. And the second recipient is Andrew Thomas," I smile and start clapping. Relief fills my body.

I watch as Andrew walks up to the stage and shakes my dad's hand. He closes the speech and everyone walks out. My dad is still on stage talking to maria and Andrew. I wait in the front row.

Andrew walks down and I grab him giving him the biggest hug. "Congratulations," I say and he smiles.

"Oh thank you, Grey," he says holding me tightly.

"So you're going to be in Seattle this summer then?" I smile.

"Yes I am," he says and I smile.

"Oh my gosh that makes me so happy," I say.

"Hey do you want to grab dinner?" He asks.

"I would love to, my dad is driving home tonight so let me say goodbye to him," I say.

"I'll meet you in the front," he says and I smile.

I walk on stage and wait for the dean to be talking to my dad. My dad walks over after he is done and wraps me in his arms. "Was that a surprise?" He asks.

"I'm so excited. That means Andrew will be in Seattle," I say and smile.

"I'm glad that makes you happy, now my sweet Bubs I have to get back to your mother and my work. We both want to come down for lunch soon one day?" He says.

"Yes I would love that," I say.

"And I love you, keep in touch," he says.

"You know I will, I love you," I hug him.

"I love you most," he says and I hug him one last time before heading out to find Andrew.

"Ready Mr. Thomas?" I ask.

"As I'll ever be Ms. Grey," he says and we head over to our favorite little bistro. When we sit down we order right away.

"So I've been wanting to talk to you for awhile now," andrew says and I am confused.

"What's up?" I ask him.

"Well, a couple weeks ago Ava visited," he starts and I have a feeling I know where this is going.

"Yeah?" I say.

"And well I'm going to be honest we hooked up," he says and I nod.

"Trust me I know," I laugh.

"You do?" He asks.

"You really think I would believe you guys just fell asleep on our couch together?" I ask him.

"Yeah I'm not sure," he says and I laugh. "But anyway, umm Ava and I have been texting and I'm really starting to like her," he says.

"Andrew, that's great," I say.

"Really?" He asks.

"Yeah why do you sound so surprised?" I ask him.

"Well I know she's your cousin and all," he says and rubs the back of his neck.

"Hey I love you. And I love her. I am beyond happy for the two of you. And you'll be together in the summer," I say and he smiles.

"You are the best, Grey," he says and I smile.

Oh my two worlds colliding.

—-

It's the week before Halloween, which means I need to get a costume. I have no clue what I want to be this year. Usually Maisy comes up with a plan, but she is visiting her friend in Michigan for Halloween.

I am at the Halloween store now. I decide to call Nathan. He usually has some very good ideas. He picks up fairly quickly.

"How's my girl?" He asks.

"I'm pretty good, how's my boy," I ask.

"Better now that I'm talking to you. How may I be of assistance, Phoebe Grey?" He asks.

"I'm looking for a Halloween costume and am clueless," I say.

"Hmm you could be a nun," he says.

"I'm sure you would like that," I laugh.

"Yeah I would," he says. "What about a pirate," he says.

"I'm not sure an eye patch would suit me," I say and he laughs.

"Okay what about a devil," he says.

"Fitting, but that's what Olivia is being," I say.

"What about an angel," he says.

"That's what Kendra is being," I say.

"Hmmm okay what about a hula dancer?" He asks. I think about it.

"You are a genius, that is such a cute idea. I knew you would have great ideas," I say and he laughs.

"I'm always here, Baby. And try not to be the most revealing hula girl," he says.

"Pinky promise," I smile.

"I love you, now my little hula girl I have a huge medical terminology test tomorrow so I am going to let you go," he says.

"I love you. Good luck studying. Text me after you test tomorrow," I say.

"Love you more, Bee," he says before hanging up.

I finish talking to him and now have the mission of finding a hula outfit. I find the skirt and some green booty shorts to wear underneath. I decide on wearing just a read crop top on top. I find a lei too. Perfect.

I buy the outfit and head home. I try it on when I get there and send Nathan lots of pictures. Some more flirty than others to get him through studying. He is so funny in his replies.

I go downstairs after putting my outfit away and head outside on the patio. I get out my laptop and decide to work on some homework and study. Never too early to get ahead.

I put my headphones in and get working. I finish up a paper I had to do and create flash cards for a test I have next week. I go through them multiple times. Psychology is getting more and more difficult as the year goes on.

I will definitely have to go to office hours tomorrow to meet with my professor. I am struggling with this unit. As I'm going through my cards I stop when someone taps me.

"Hey sorry to bother you, do you want to come eat dinner or we can save you a plate?" Olivia says.

"No no I'll come in," I say. I walk in and smell pizza and pasta.

I grab myself some and sit down with Maisy, Olivia, and Kendra. It is Sunday and we try to eat together every Sunday.

"Maisy, when do you leave?" Kendra asks.

"This Thursday, my flight is at 1," she says.

"You are going to have so much fun," I say.

"I know I'm so excited, I'll miss you guys though," she says and we smile.

"We'll all be missing you too," Olivia says.

"So Olivia how is TJ?" Maisy asks.

"He's good, getting ready to graduate in the spring," she says.

"That's crazy and so exciting," I say.

"I know," she shakes her head.

"What is he doing after graduation?" I ask.

"He is going to start working at Flecks, which is a real estate company based in Oregon," she says.

"What part?" Kendra asks.

"Portland," She says and I nod.

"So you'll be close," I say.

"About 30 minutes," she says.

"So you'll still be able to visit and stuff?" Kendra says.

"Yeah which is so nice," she says and we smile.

"I'm happy for you Liv," I say. "We all are," Maisy says.

"I love you guys like no other," she says and smiles.

This group of girls has my whole heart. I am truly happy that I get to live with them.

—

It's Halloween! I am so excited! I have my costume on and am ready to go. I am just doing the finishing touches on my makeup, when I hear Olivia call for me.

"Phoebe, can you get the door?" She asks. She is downstairs and can't get the door? I sigh and put down my mascara. Instead of fighting I'll just do it.

I walk downstairs and head over to the front door. I pass Olivia doing the dishes which is weird because it is Kendra's week. I open the front door and have to double check my eyes.

"Nathan?" I say.

Olivia comes around the corner and laughs. I wrap my arms around him tightly holding him so close to me.

"Nathan oh my gosh, what are you doing here?" I ask him.

"Well I couldn't let me hula girl go alone," he says.

"But, but you have school and-" he cuts me off.

"I have fall break this weekend, and came here to spend it with you," he says.

"Oh my gosh you are here," I laugh and hug him again.

"Well I have to get ready so take me up to your room, lilo," he says and I laugh.

I take him up to my room and as soon as the door is shut our lips find each other's. His hands make their way to my hair and back and he backs me up to my bed. We fall back and he gets on top of me.

"Do we have time for this?" He asks.

"I don't know or care, we are doing it," I say as I put my lei and take off my skirt. I am left in a red tube top and green booty shorts.

"you are so fucking hot," he says and I smile.

Our lips find each other again and he wastes no time getting me and himself naked. As soon as we are I feel his fingers dip inside of me. "You are so ready," he says.

"Always for you," I say and kiss him passionately. Soon he makes his way inside of me. I cry out and arch my back. It feels so good.

"Oh you feel so good," he says.

"Oh don't stop Nathan," I cry out.

"Feel it baby," he says and picks up his pace. My nails find his back as he continues to thrust into me.

"Oh Nathan," I cry out not caring how loud I'm being.

"Shhh," he says in my ear. "You don't want to let the whole house know I'm fucking you," he says.

"I don't care about the whole house," I say and he laughs and picks up the pace.

"I'm coming," I cry out and he finishes along with me.

"Holy shit," he says.

"Yeah you're telling me," I say and he laughs.

"I love you," I say and hug him to me.

"I love you more," He says.

"Now let's get ready for Halloween," he says.

"Perfect," I say and he smiles.

I get my lei and skirt back on. Nathan is wearing a Hawaiian shirt and board shorts. He looks like the total surfer dude and it is so hot. We head downstairs and both grab drinks.

"Are you guys ready? The Uber will be here in 10," Maisy says.

"Yep," I say and chug my drink.

We get into the Uber all together and head out. We go to the frat house where the party is and walk inside. It is crazy here.

"Nathan, let's get a drink," I say.

I walk over to the bar with him and we both get drinks. "You look so hot," Nathan says into my ear.

"You are telling me," I say and he laughs. I kiss him again before I feel someone tap my shoulder. I turn to see Andrew and hug him tightly. He is Hugh Hefner for Halloween.

"How are you?" I ask him.

"I'm great, you didn't tell me Nathan was coming," he says as Nathan and him bro hug.

"He didn't tell me either," I laugh.

"Surprise? Moore you dog," he laughs.

"So I heard you're coming to Seattle this summer," Nathan says.

"Yeah, I've started looking for apartments now," he says.

"Oh my gosh, man that's great," Nathan says.

"Well come on Hawaiian friends let's go socialize," Andrew says. We walk out into the dance floor and keep drinking and talking.

I introduce Nathan to a lot of my friends. Some of them remember from the last time he visited. We get more drinks and after awhile we are so drunk.

"I have to pee," I say into Nathan's ear. He takes my hand and walks out with me.

We go into the bathroom and Nathan guards the door. I pee and then stand up. As I'm washing my hands Nathan comes up behind me And kisses my neck.

"I'm so drunk," I say and he laughs.

"I can tell," he says.

"Let's go do shots," I say and he laughs.

"You do not need any more alcohol in you," He says.

"Then take me home and fuck me," I say and smile.

"You don't have to ask twice," Nathan says. He takes my hand and pulls me out of the bathroom.

We say goodbye to our friends and Nathan calls in Uber. I can already tell this night is going to end very well.

_**NOVEMBER **_

I wake up in the morning feeling hungover as ever. Halloween never does me well. I also am very hot. More hot than usual. I open my eyes to find a body wrapped around me. A mess of brown hair lays on my chest.

I brush the hair back to see the most beautiful figure ever. The stunning Nathan Moore. He has to go home today unfortunately. I'm going to miss him so much. But I do get to see him in two weeks for thanksgiving and our 5 year anniversary.

5 years. That is crazy. I don't think I've had anything for 5 years that I've loved as much as him. I use my nails to scratch his head. I love this boy so much. It physically hurts.

I'm naked except for my panties and by the looks of it Nathan is naked except for his boxers. He shifts on me and stays asleep. I couldn't move even if I wanted to right now. He has me pinned down.

I feel my phone vibrate. I grab it carefully without waking sleeping beauty on my chest. It's a text from Ava.

*must talk ASAP. Andrew asked me out. I'm sorry I haven't told you eek.*

I smile and put my phone down. Oh Ava. She thinks I'm clueless about their relationship. Both of them must think I didn't see them on the couch. Those two love birds kill me.

I put my phone down and smile. I'm glad her and andrew are talking. If they last Andrew will be good for her. She needs someone stable and who cares about her. Not that Tyler didn't care about her but they were very similar. Similar in the fact that neither of them cared much about what the other did.

My sleeping beauty starts to wake up and I look down. He groans and looks up at me. I smile at him and move his hair out of his face.

"Good morning," I smile.

"It is now," he says and I laugh.

"You need a haircut," I say.

"Not my priority at the moment," he says and I shrug. He moves so he's on his back and pulls me to his chest.

"Do you have to go?" I ask him.

"As much as I want to say no, yes I do," he says and I frown.

"I'll see you in a little over two weeks though," he says and I nod.

"Thanksgiving," I smile. "Actually I was thinking," I say.

"You thinking? No way," he says sarcastically. I tend to overthink sometimes. I hit his chest playfully.

"You said your family isn't going to be together for thanksgiving right?" I say.

"Well not this year, Berkeley is away and staying at school and my dad is gone at work. My mom is going to Europe with her mom," he says and I nod.

"I got invited to go to all three places, but really I just want to be home in Seattle," he says and I nod.

"So if I invited you to my families thanksgiving what would you say," I ask.

"I would say are you sure?" He says.

"Of course I am. You wouldn't be the first lover of the Grey children to come to a Grey thanksgiving," I smile.

"Oh yes, I remember you roasted Delaney, then I came to your house," he says.

"I did not roast her. I just wasn't expecting her and yes you did, that was our first kiss," I say.

"Well thank god for you not welcoming her," he says and I laugh. I lean down and kiss his lips.

"So what do you say?" I ask him.

"If you are sure, then I say yes," he smiles.

"Good, now come cook me breakfast," I laugh. We both get up and head downstairs. No one is home at the moment. I sit on a bar stool and watch as Nathan prepares pancakes.

"So what's your plan when you get back to school?" I ask him.

"Oh you know, study, work out, miss my extremely hot girlfriend," he says and passes me an orange juice and Advil.

"Oh you flatter me, Nathan Moore," I say and he laughs.

"So what's your plan?" He asks.

"Well next week, I am going to take all my exams. Then I am going to Kendra's birthday dinner with girls from her hometown," I say.

"That sounds like fun," he says.

"It should be. I'm excited because she is excited," I say.

"And that is why you are a good friend, Phoebe grey," He says.

"I try my hardest Nathan Moore," I say. He passes me my plate of pancakes and I thank him.

We eat breakfast together and talk about mindless stuff. Conversation with him is so easy. Everything is.

After breakfast I help him pack up his stuff and we head back downstairs. "You're sure you have to go?" I ask him one last time.

"I'm sure. I'm sorry baby I wish I could stay," he says and I nod.

"I know I wish you could too, two weeks though," I say and force a smile.

"Two weeks then I'm all yours," he says and wraps a hand around my waist. I kiss him hard and pull back.

"I love you, Nathan Moore," I say.

"And I love you, Phoebe," he says.

"Now go kick some ass at Princeton," I smile.

"Always for you," he says and I wink. He heads out the door and leaves me to go back to Princeton. Ohh how I love that boy.

—

I'm putting on the finishing touches to my hair and makeup. It's Kendra's birthday dinner. I would never say this out loud, but I really am not in the mood to go. Kendra's friends from home are not like her at all. I met them for 20 minutes and they were all fine. Well except for one.

"Phoebe time to go," I hear Kendra tell.

"Coming," I yell back. I stand up and smooth out my black romper. you can do this. I slip on my nude lace up heels and head down.

"Oh hot damn, Phoebe Grey," Kendra says and I laugh.

"Speak for yourself, hot momma," I say to her and she laughs. We all get a couple of pictures before we leave.

"Quite a short dress for this weather don't you think?" I hear the nasally voice of Kendra's bitch friend.

"It's a romper, Lily," I say. I'm really not in the mood to deal with her.

"Aw you still wear those," she says and walks away. As I'm about to go bitch her out Maisy grabs my hand.

"Woah, P. Grey. Remember she goes to USC. She's supposed to suck," Maisy says and I laugh.

"Thanks Maisy," I say and she smiles.

We head out and I stick with Maisy. When we get to the upscale restaurant I have to pee badly. Before we get seated I go to the bathroom and relieve myself. Once I am done I head back to the table. I frown as I see that the only spot open is between Lily and Olivia.

I take my seat and smile to Olivia. "I heard this place has great cocktails," I say to Kendra. I hear someone scoff next to me. I turn my head and see lily rolling her eyes. I ignore it. It takes everything out of me not to dump her water on her stupid fake blonde hair.

We all order our drinks and they set down bread. I got a lemon drop martini. I am going to need something stronger if I have to keep listening to Lily talk about how she just went from a size two to now zero. After We order our food and I get a flatbread.

I reach for a piece of bread and I feel Lily staring at me. "Can I help you?" I ask her.

"I mean I'm just surprised you keep your figure is all," she says.

"Excuse me?" I say.

"Well the piece of bread, then getting pizza for dinner. Just a lot of carbs," she says.

"You can enjoy your salad with half goat cheese and half air. While I enjoy my actual meal. Thank you for your concern," I say sarcastically. I turn back to Olivia who is holding her napkin over her mouth dying laughing. I hear Lily talking shit to her friend from home.

I order another martini. And tell the waiter to just keep them coming please. By the time our food comes I feel very drunk and am glad I got something that will help soak up the alcohol.

"Woah slow down there, boozy. We are still going to two more clubs," Lily says and her friend laughs. I reach for my drink and Liv grabs my hand.

"Ignore it," she says. I nod and take a deep breath. I just eat my pizza in peace while talking to Olivia and Maisy.

"Okay guys, is everyone ready?" Kendra asks. She is obviously drunk already.

"Yes let's go," I smile. We walk out and head down the street to the nightclub. We all get in because it's Kendra's 21st and she rented a private room.

We walk in and it's amazing. There are so many bottles of champagne around the room. I run to the one farthest from Lily and pour myself a glass.

"Cheers to Kendra," Maisy says. We all clink glasses and take a sip.

I finish my glass of champagne and pour myself another. We all sit and watch Kendra open her gifts. I got her a Kendra Scott necklace. It has her initials on it and is simple. Very Kendra.

She ends up getting a lot of very funny and cute gifts. Lily makes the biggest deal about handing her the gift. "From your best friend," I try my hardest not to eye roll. She gets her a diamond tiffany necklace. Jesus.

They hug and Kendra finishes opening up her gifts. We all head out to the dance floor. While I'm ordering another drink I hear a familiar bitchy voice.

"I mean her dad is the owner of a multi billion dollar company and she gets Kendra what a $75 dollar necklace. Just tacky if you ask me," Lily's bitch voice fills my ears. I can't help it.

"You know some people's daddy's don't buy them everything they want," I say as I grab my drink. She turns and her face looks shocked.

"Oh you've never worked a day in your life, Grey," she laughs.

"Actually, I have a 9-5 summer nannying job. 5 days a week with four kids about to be 5 next summer," I say.

"I'm surprised he doesn't have you slaving away at his company. Since what he is only there once a week? You know how big companies work. The head is always off on vacation. Cheating on his wife and playing golf," she laughs. I take a deep breath.

"You better back the fuck off," I say.

"Oh no she has daddy issues. I wonder what she's going to do when I tell her about her boyfriend cheating on her," that's it. I snap.

I wind up and slap Lily square in the face. No one talks about my dad or my boyfriend. She looks shocked and quite pissed off. Next thing I know I am on the floor wrestling in the middle of a bar with her.

"You fucking brat," she screams.

I am on top and slap her back for hitting me in the face. Until I am yanked off her and pulled away. I look up and see Sawyer. Across from me is a bar manager holding her. And we've made quite the scene.

I'm a dead woman when I get home.

—

"What do you have to say for yourself?" My dad screams as I sit on the couch in my childhood home. I'm home for Thanksgiving and the first thing I got was yanked on the couch and screamed at.

"You should see the other guy?" I say. My brother starts laughing and my dad pinches the bridge of his nose.

"Are you insane? What if the press had been there? What if this girl had been insane and took a glass to your head? And what in God's name caused you to start this shit?" He Asks.

"She said that you cheated on mom, and that Nathan cheats on me," I say. My dad looks dumb founded.

"Does this girl even know me or Nathan?" My dad asks.

"No," I say.

"Then why in God's name would you feed into her bullshit, Phoebe? This was a high end bar. Do you know how much could have gone wrong?" He asks.

"Yeah but she was shit talking my family," I say.

"Phoebe, in life people are going to say things that you don't like. That doesn't mean that you roundhouse punch them. You could have gotten yourself hurt," he says.

"I know It was stupid. She just had been getting under my skin all night," I say.

"It takes way more strength to walk away than it does to fight back," my dad says and I nod.

"Now go have Gail give you something to put on your lip. We don't need the whole family knowing you got in a bar fight" my dad says and I nod.

I walk out and grab some neosporin. My lip has a cut in it. From her stupid long fake nails. The good thing is, all my friends thought it was hilarious even Kendra said it was the best birthday ever.

I hear a knock on the door and go and open it. It's Nathan and I rush into his arms. "Woah, slow down there Rocky, you and I have a lot to talk about," he says. I laugh at his new nickname for me.

"Look, I'm sorry okay? I just got yelled at by my dad please not you too," I say. He frowns and comes inside.

"Basement," he says. He takes my hand and leads me downstairs. We go straight into the bedroom and Nathan locks the door.

"Strip," he says.

"What?" I ask.

"Look I found the bar fight incredibly stupid. But also very fucking sexy. If you don't want me to yell I need to be buried inside you," he says. I smile and sit on the bed. I slip off my shorts and he comes and gets on top of me. He's laying in between my legs. He wastes no time unbuckling his jeans.

He slips my panties off and enters me. I moan and grip his shirt. His pants aren't even all the way off. He starts thrusting into me and I bury my face in his neck.

"You feel so good," he says to me. I moan and hold on.

He keeps thrusting and I am grabbing the sheets trying to hold on. It feels so good and I'm moaning into Nathan's neck.

"Let go," He says and I try.

"Cum for me," he says and his words are my undoing. I end up finishing with him. He helps me slip back on my panties and shorts after he cleans me up.

"So uh welcome home," I say. Nathan laughs and pulls me to him. I rest my head in the crook of his neck.

"I missed you," He says and I smile.

"I missed you too," I say.

"So Rocky, tell me about this bar fight," he says and I cover my face with my hands.

"I hate you," I laugh.

"Come on tell me," he says and props himself up on his elbow.

"This Lily girl is a bitch. The biggest bitch I have ever met and she was saying that my dad cheats on my mom and you cheated on me. So I slapped her," I say. He looks down at me and shakes his head.

"Babe, you know none of that is true," he says.

"I know and I've already been lectured about it from Sawyer, my dad, my dad again, Teddy, and my mom," I say.

"Fine, just don't do it again. And if you do let me be there to watch my girl in action," he says and I laugh.

"We should go upstairs and get ready. People will be here soon," I say and he smiles.

"Sounds good," He says.

We head upstairs and I get ready for thanksgiving. I put on a dress and heels. Nathan has on his dress shirt and pants. We walk downstairs and I grab us waters.

My Aunt Mia's family comes first. She gives me the biggest hug and tells me how adorable I look. She is more than thrilled that Nathan is here too and gives him a huge hug.

The rest of the family comes and we are all just hanging out at the counter. Nathan is by my side but talking to my uncle.

"Okay who wants wine?" Mia asks as she pops the bottle. Everyone gives her their glass.

"Phoebe? Nathan?" She asks.

"Mia, Phoebe is not 21," my dad cuts in.

"Oh Christian stop it's one glass. You let Teddy drink when he came home junior year," Mia says. "Okay now you two have to have a glass," She pours us both a glass of white wine. We cheers and everyone takes a sip. My dad looks less than pleased.

We all sit down and have an amazing dinner cooked by Grandma Grace. It has been the best night and seeing Nathan bond with my family more than I could have ever asked for.

—-

Today is Nathan and my 5 year anniversary. It is the craziest thing I can't even begin to explain it. That is a very long time.

Right now he is on his way to pick me up. I have no clue what we are doing. He planned it all. I am so excited. He pulls up and gets out. He has flowers in his hand and comes over and kisses me.

"Happy anniversary," he smiles. I kiss him back and take the flowers.

"Happy anniversary to you too, my love," I say. We both get in the car and he starts to drive.

"Where are we going?" I ask him.

"That's the surprise," he says and I smile. As we are driving it feels too familiar. As if I know where we are going.

We finally pull up to our high school. I am so confused and look over at him. "Keep an open mind," he says and he has officially stumped me.

"Okay?" I say. Nathan takes my hand and we start walking up. We go in the side door and start walking the halls.

"Just like old times," I laugh.

"Something like that," he says.

"Here," he takes my hand and we walk into the office. On the floor there is a picnic blanket and Mexican food from Puerto Rojo. Tears spring to my eyes.

"This is the first place I ever laid eyes on you. And the first food I ever saw you eat," he says. "I was surprised you ate," he says and I laugh. I wrap my arms around him tightly.

"Nathan I don't know what to say," I say and wipe a stray tear.

"Do you like it?" He asks.

"Like it? I love it. This is the most thoughtful thing anyone has ever done for me," I say.

"I'm glad, so are you hungry?" He asks.

"Yeah, I am," I smile.

We sit down and he gives me my order. It's exactly what I get. This boy always thinks of the little things. Makes me fall more in love with him every single day.

"So five years huh?" I ask.

"Five whole years. That is crazy, how are you still with me?" He asks.

"Are you kidding look around us. How are you still with me is the real question?" I ask him. He laughs and kisses my head.

"You have and will always have my heart," he says and I smile.

"And you mine," I say. He kisses me.

"So I just saw Ava posted a picture with Andrew," Nathan says.

"Yeah they are dating now," I say. Nathan laughs until he sees I'm serious.

"Wait what?" He asks.

"Yeah," I say as I take another bite of my food.

"How do you feel about that?" Nathan asks. I smile because he is always just so caring.

"I'm happy they are happy," I say.

"Well if they make it to summer they'll get to spend that together," Nathan says.

"Very true facts, Mr. Moore," I say.

"How did they meet?" Nathan asks.

"When Ava came to visit. They ended up leaving the party together," I laugh.

"Oh gross I don't need to have that picture in my head," Nathan says. "I've already heard enough of Ava and her sex life," Nathan says and I look confused.

"Remember our friend, Phillip?" Nathan asks sarcastically.

"Ew he was such a creep," I say.

"I'll cheers to that," Nathan and I clink our margaritas together.

"You had your fair share of creeps, Phoebe grey," Nathan says and I nod.

"Him, Mr. Williams, Ryan Malford," I say.

"Oh my gosh, did I tell you?" Nathan asks.

"What?" I ask.

"He just went to prison for dealing heroin," Nathan says.

"What? Ryan Malford?" I ask.

"Yeah, my dad was telling me. One of his fellow lawyers is on the case," Nathan takes a sip of his drink.

"Jesus, didn't see that one coming," I say.

"Really? I mean he did attack you," Nathan says.

"Well yeah, but heroin? Who would have thought," I say.

"Me, he was always trying and doing dumb shit. I remember he was trying to sell the basketball team steroids," Nathan says.

"Was he offering a group rate?" I ask. Both Nathan and I start dying laughing. Nathan has tears running down his face.

"Gosh, I love you," Nathan says.

"I love you too," I smile.

"Well let's finish this pitcher of margaritas and get on our way," I say and he smiles.

We end up heading out and Nathan takes me on an adventure. We go hike on his favorite trail and it is so much fun. We laugh a lot and end up on a cliff where he gives me my anniversary present. It's a flight to New Jersey in February.

"Babe, no way," I say.

"Well what else would I get you?" He asks and I laugh.

"Well funny enough," I hand him his plane ticket and it's a flight home for spring break. He doesn't have a game and was just going to sit in New Jersey.

"Mrs Cruz will be having her fifth and she wants us to watch the kids," I say and Nathan smiles.

"Thank you baby," he smiles and kisses me.

"I love you," I say.

"You know I love you more," he says and we start kissing again.

**(y'all I have been going through a really tough couple of months. I am not going to go into detail about what has been going on, but one word to describe it is tough. I know this chapter is only 3 months, but that is where I am starting to get back into the swing of things. Thank you all for understanding. You guys are the best.) **


	6. Chapter 6

**Chapter 6 **

**(Hi all. Me again. It still has been pretty rough around here. Things are slowly and I mean SLOWLY started to get better. I know this is shorter than what we are used to, but I can't push myself right now. I am starting to think about doing a long senior year recap instead of a chapter like this. That way I can get onto the exciting real world of Phoebe Grey. Let me know what y'all think about that. I think it will be easier for me to get those chapters out quicker and more frequently not only because they aren't 13000+ words, but because I will have more motivation to get them out. Enjoy this chapter and leave me some love. THANK YOU GUYS FOR YOUR LOVE AND SUPPORT XOXOXO) **

_**JANUARY **_

I am back at school after a nice long winter break. It has been a whirlwind of emotions this past break. A lot has gone on in the Grey Family. My Aunt Kate's dad passed away. Seeing Kate and Ava and even Elliot go through that was heartbreaking. Today is his funeral. We will all be in attendance.

Nathan is coming along with Tyler. We all want to be there to support Ava and her family. He died from a long fight from cancer. That poor man fought like no other. He is truly an inspiration.

I slip on my black dress that goes down to about my calves and has half length sleeves. I put on black heels and then jewelry. I have my hair curled and my make up simple.

When I walk downstairs I see my dad hugging my mom. My mom has taken this very hard. Kate's Dad was a lot like her own. When Grandpa Ray couldn't be there Kate's dad was.

My mom is in a black long sleeve dress that goes down to her knees. She has black heels on and her hair in an updo. My dad is in a black suit and black dress shoes. They both look very well put together.

"He's in a better place now without pain," my dad says to my mom as he holds her rubbing her back.

"Phoebe," My mom says and tries to hide the fact that she has been crying.

"Hi mom," I say as I hug her. Teddy comes down too in his black suit.

"You both look lovely," my mom says. Teddy kisses her cheek and I stand there looking at my feet.

We walk outside and get into the car. We drive there in comfortable silence. When we arrive at the church, we hug Elliot and Kate. Ava and I hug for a while as she cries into my shoulder. It takes everything out of me not to breakdown.

"You are so strong," I say and she nods hugging me tightly. "I love you, PG," she says and I smile. I wipe her eyes and we walk into the church.

We sit closer to the front with Kate and her family. My mom and dad are next to each other then Ted then me.

I was not expecting this to be as hard as it is. As the funeral starts the pastor starts talking. I look to see Ava holding a tissue to her eyes. Then to Kate who is crying also. I look down at my lap trying not to cry. I wasn't very close with Ava's grandpa, and even now I am struggling not to cry.

Kate's mom begins to make a speech and I look down at my dad holding my mom who is crying. This is all so much. I know Nathan is closer to the back of the church, but I wish he could be here to hold me.

Kate's mom's speech really does break my heart. She talks about all the good times with her husband and how he was the better part of her. I can't imagine losing Nathan or my dad. I couldn't go on without either of them.

I think about losing my dad and my heart sinks. I start to feel sick. As Kate talks about her dad tears well up in my eyes. I have to take a couple of deep breaths. I can't ever lose my dad.

When the time funeral service ends we head to the lobby of the church for the calling hours. My mom's eyes are so red. I start walking to the bathroom because I can barely take it. As I go into the family restroom and go to shut the door a hand stops it. Tears are already down my face.

"Oh Bee," I hear one of the most comforting voices in the world. Nathan quickly shuts and locks the door.

"I I I can't, I can't lose my dad," I cry. Nathan takes me in his arms and holds me to his chest.

"Shh your dad isn't going anywhere, baby," he says. I shake my head.

"I can't lose him ever," I say and he kisses my head.

"You don't have to worry about that right now," he says calmly rubbing my back. He reaches over and grabs a box of tissues. He starts dabbing my eyes carefully not to mess up my mascara.

"I'm sorry this is happening, Bee," he says. "I wish there was something I could say or do to make this easier on you," He says and I nod.

"This is just so hard," I say and he nods.

"I know baby," he says and kisses my head. "Is there anything I can do to make this easier?" He asks and I shake my head cleaning my face up.

"Why don't we go back out there and sit, people are going to wonder where you went," he says and I nod. When we walk out and head towards the reception area, my dad is walking towards us. He has a look of concern etched on his face.

"Bubs, oh my girl," he says.

"I'm fine," I say and my dad just looks at me.

"Nathan, could I have a moment?" My dad asks. Nathan nods and kisses my head before walking away. My dad guides me to a bench around the corner.

"What's going on, Bubs?" He asks.

"This funeral is just hitting me really hard, and I know I didn't know him very well," I say and my dad cuts me off.

"It doesn't matter how well you knew him, Bubs. You can still be upset," he says and I nod. That is reassuring to hear.

"I just… I just," I can barely get the words out.

"It's okay," my dad says and rubs my back.

"What am I going to do when it's me in Kate's position, I can't lose you," I say and that's when I break down. My dad takes me in his arms and I rest my head on his shoulder crying.

"Shhhh, Bubs," My dad says.

"You don't have to worry about that," he says and he rubs my back.

"But it's going to happen and I won't be able to go on without you," I say and he shakes his head.

"If you think that I am leaving you anytime soon you are crazy, Bubs. Stalker tendencies remember," he says and bops my nose. I laugh and wipe my nose with the back of my hand. My dad passed me a tissue and I start wiping my face up.

"I am going to be here, Bubs. I'm going to be here to walk you down the aisle, to spoil your kids, to be here whenever you need me," he says and I nod. He wraps me in his arms hugging me tightly.

"I love you," I say to him.

"I love you most," he says back.

—

I am back at school and moved back into my house. It was a hard transition, but I am getting better. I did well on all my exams, so now I am trying to prepare for my internship this summer.

Today I am going to the children's hospital in Bellevue I am staying at my house for the weekend because Bellevue is only like a 20 minute drive.

I am on my way there now. I am wearing dress pants and a nice blouse. I walk into the hospital and get signed in. I have to show an ID and bring my background check. I am shadowing Dr. Hackett today.

I see her walking over to me and walk over shaking her hand. "Hi Dr. Hackett, I am phoebe Grey," I say.

"Hi darling, it is so nice to meet you," she says.

"So good to meet you too, I'll take you up to my office," she says. We go up to the 5th floor and she leads me into her office. She sits behind her desk and I sit in one of the chairs in front of her.

"So tell me a little about yourself and how you got into psychology," she says.

"I am 20 years old, I graduate from college next May which is so weird to say. I got interested in psychology when I went into the wrong class freshman year. I became so intrigued and ended up switching my major to psychology. I love working with kids and being around them I nanny four kids during the summer and their mom is expecting the fifth this March, so I combined my love for kids and psychology and here I am," I say. She smiles at me and nods.

"You are just cute as a button," she says and I thank her.

"Well you are at the right place, Phoebe. So today I'm just going to be taking you through a normal day," she says and I nod.

"So for starters I check my population chart. See if I have any new patients that I need to see and schedule when I am going to see the current patients. I printed out a copy for you, it has the patient's name, age, gender, and reason for being in the hospital. If they have any special circumstances it is printed to the side," I nod and look over the sheet. I see an 11 year old girl on the lists special circumstance is that she was sexually abused. My heart drops.

"So today it looks like I just have one new patient. It is a four year old boy named Auidan, if you want to write that down," I nod and do as she says.

"So we are due at our first room in 10 would you like coffee or anything?" She asks.

"I am alright, thank you for offering," I say. She smiles and I follow her out. We head up to the 7th floor and walk to a room.

When we walk in there is a 15 year old girl laying on her side with an IV attached to her arm. "Ashely, is it okay if I come in," Dr. Hackett asks her. She nods and Dr. Hackett motions for me to stay for a second.

"Ashley today I have a psychology student shadowing me. She is going to be sitting and observing me, is that okay?" Dr. Hackett asks. She nods again and Doctor Hackett motions for me to come in.

"Ashely, this is Phoebe. Phoebe this is Ashley," I smile and wave to her.

"It is nice to meet you," I say. I take a seat on a chair in her room and watch as Dr. Hackett starts their session. They begin talking about the hospital and anxiety that comes with it. They talk about how Ashley did talking to her mother when she came and saw her.

Ashley obviously has difficulty talking to her mother. She explains that her mother makes her angry. Dr. Hackett asks her more questions about that. I watch as they interact and write down notes about techniques she uses with Ashely.

They start discussing ways that they could interact that would be comfortable for both of them. Dr. Hackett really is amazing at her job. She guides her through ways they could resolve problems and cope.

After the session, I thank Ashley for allowing me to observe and we walk out. We visit a couple of more kiddos. The younger ones love Dr. Hackett because she makes their sessions more play based. With an 8 year old she incorporated drawing. With the 5 year old there were puppets.

We go to many more rooms and I know this is the field for me. I am so excited to get involved this summer and do my internship here.

—-

Today is my birthday. I am 21 years old. That is so weird to say. I just got my new sideways ID. It is like a right of passage.

I head home and walk into my house. When I get there I hear a bunch of voices. I walk into my kitchen and see Kendra, Olivia, TJ, Maisy, Andrew, and Nathan. What is Nathan doing here?

"Surprise," He says and walks over to me hugging me. I wrap my arms around him laughing.

"Nathan what! What are you doing here?" I ask him.

"You really think I'd miss your 21st?" He asks.

"Well obviously not but you didn't have to come all the way here," I say and he laughs.

"Of course I did," he smiles. I shake my head at him.

"Hi guys," I smile as I look at my group of friends. I get passed around getting lots of hugs.

"Grey you ready for tonight?" Maisy asks me. She rented out the top floor of a bar for 100 bucks because she fucks the guy occasionally who owns it.

"You are insane," I say and she laughs.

"We'll chop chop guys we are leaving at 830 for the club," I check my watch and we have two hours. I take Nathan's hand and take him upstairs. When I shut my door he sits on my bed.

"I can't believe you are here," I smile. As he sits on the bed I stand between his legs. His hands cup my butt.

"I wouldn't miss your day for anything," he says and I wrap my arms around him.

"Mmmm god is it possible you get hotter every time I see you?" I ask. He laughs and pats my ass.

"I don't know baby, you tell me," he says. He wraps his arms around me and pulls me back on top of him so I am laying on top of him on my bed. I squeal and laugh.

"Babe," I say and he laughs.

"Mmm you phoebe Grey, are a vision," he says and I smile. It's funny to me because he has grown so much and become a man even though I thought he already was one in high school. He has some stubble on his face. Oh he is so hot. I cup his cheeks and start kissing him.

"You need to get ready," He says as I kiss his neck.

"Are you denying me," I ask him.

"Wouldn't dream of it. But I do know Maisy will kill us both if we are not out the door by 830," he says and I laugh.

"True," I smile.

"Go shower, wench," he says and slaps my ass. Ow that hurt.

"Ouch dude," I say and he laughs laughing on my bed watching me. I go into the bathroom and climb into the shower. I start letting the water wet my body. Soon the shower curtain is pulled back and a naked Nathan gets in behind me. I knew it was only a matter of time.

His arm wraps around my waist and he pulls my wet hair to the side kissing my neck. "Couldn't stay away could you?" I ask and he laughs.

"Never from you," He says.

We end up having a very fun and drawn out shower. He gives me my birthday sex multiple times and in different ways. I know I've only done it with that boy but he makes it enough.

I blow dry and curl my hair while Nathan studies. Pre med will do it. I put on makeup and slide on my black tight dress and black shoes.

"Damn baby," Nathan says as he looks up. I laugh as I put on my earrings and perfume.

"I'll have to keep a close eye on you," He says and I smile.

We walk downstairs and take a bunch of pictures. I get so many good ones with Nathan to post and send to my parents. We head out and head to the bar.

When we get there I get passed a glass of champagne most of us our 21 now, so there were no fakes used. I drink two glasses of champagne and then go and order my first drink.

I get a cosmo. It is so yummy though. I will pay for it tomorrow. I am dancing with Nathan. Maisy comes over and pulls me to the picture wall. We take a bunch of pictures. I feel someone staring at me to turn and find Nathan. I smile and wave. He blows me a kiss and I wink.

I keep drinking and drinking. I am officially drunk. Andrew and I are on the couch singing "Dancing Queen" I am laughing my ass off. I am bouncing on the couch so hard that I slip.

As I'm falling to the floor a pair of arms comes in and swoops me up. Everyone is staring and I look to see Nathan holding me. Everyone claps and laughs and Nathan sets me down.

"That's enough couch time for you," he says and I blush.

"You always save me," I say and he kisses me.

"Come do a shot with me," I say.

"Deal," he says.

We walk over to the bar and get two tequila shots. We down them both and high five each other. Nathan is drunk too I love drunk Nathan.

"Come with me," I say and he looks confused.

"Come on," I say. I take him to the maintenance closet I saw on the way in.

"Pheebs," He is laughing. I pull him in and he comes to me and picks me up from my thighs my dress rolls up.

"This has to be quick," he laughs. I start kissing him hard and he slips himself inside of me.

I throw my head back as we have sex. I am so drunk but that's what is making this fun. I kiss him hard and hold on.

Soon we are both finishing in each other's arms. Nathan sets me down gently and I clean myself up. He does the same and I cough and take his hand.

We walk out of the closet nonchalantly. We go back to our friends who all know what just happened. We continue dancing and partying for the rest of the night.

_**FEBRUARY **_

Today my dad is in Vancouver for a meeting about his internship program. I am meeting him at the business school building to go to dinner. We are going to go to The Roof. A new restaurant that's on the 15th floor of a building.

I walk into the building with my hair done. I am in grey thigh high boots, jeans and a sweater. A very winter look. My hair is curled and to the side. I walk outside the dean's office and sit on a bench.

I get on my phone and text my dad I'm here when he's ready. I also text Nathan an update of my day. We do that from time to time. I ask him how he is and how he is doing. I told him I miss him.

I really do miss him. I go into my phone and mindlessly go through social media until I hear a door open. Out walks my dad and an older gentlemen. They shake hands and bid each other goodbye. I stand up grabbing my purse.

"Hey Bubs," My dad says hugging me tightly.

"Hi Dad," I say and he smiles.

"You ready to go?" He asks and I nod. We walk out and head into his car. We start driving to the restaurant as he tells me about his meeting.

When we get there we head up to the 15th floor and get seated by the window. The view is absolutely stunning. I missed this. The waiter comes over and gives us both drink menus. My dad orders a glass of wine and I get key lime martini. My dad eyes me and I wink at him.

"So tell me about your birthday, my 21 year old," He says and I laugh.

"Maisy as usual went above and beyond by renting out the top floor of a bar and throwing me a party. Nathan came too as you saw in the pictures which was so much fun," I say. My dad smiles and thanks the waiter as he drops off our drinks. My martini glass comes out with a graham cracker crusted rim and soft green liquid. I try it and it is amazing.

"It is so weird having a drink with you," my dad says shaking his head.

"It's weird for me too," I say and he smiles.

"I swear it was just yesterday that you were shaving with me in the mirror," he says and I shake my head.

"When was that?" I ask and he smiles.

"You were four," he says.

(Flashback Christian POV)

Ana is out of town with Teddy in New York this weekend so it's just me and Phoebe. Today I am planning on taking her to lunch and a trampoline park. She is obsessed with bouncing on trampolines. She would stay for days if you let her.

I just woke up and am in my pajama bottoms and white shirt. Next to me is Phoebe sprawled out like a starfish in her polka dot pajamas. Of course her side of the covers are kicked off.

Last night when I tucked her into her bed and read her a story she was out. Then at about 10 pm I heard crying coming from her room. I ran in and went to her bed where she was sitting up and was soaking from her sweat.

I picked her up and striped her down to her underwear and sat with her in the rocking chair. When I asked her what was wrong, she told me she has a scary dream. She had only been in bed for about two hours so I just decided to bring her in bed with me.

I walk into the bathroom and get a quick shower. After I leave my shirt off and throw on sweats and get my shaving kit out. I lather my face in shaving cream and begin to shave.

Soon I hear the pitter-patter of little feet behind me. I turn and see phoebe watching me. She looks so mesmerized. "Good morning, sleepyhead," I say.

Phoebe smiles and rushes over to me hugging my leg. I pick her up and she rests her head on my shoulder. Her hand goes to my scars where she feels them. She always does this whenever I hold her shirtless. It is such a good reminder of how far I have come over the years.

"Hi Daddy," she says.

"Hi baby girl," I smile.

"What's you doing," she asks.

"I'm shaving," I tell her. I set her on the counter in front of me and continue. She watches me very intently.

"I want to do it," she says. I laugh and look at her.

"I want to save like daddy," she says.

"Shave honey, Shave," I tell her.

"I want to… save like daddy," she says struggling to pronounce it. I smile and decide that she's only this age once. What's a little mess to me.

"Okay, let daddy get your hair back," I say. I go to Ana's drawer and get out a hair tie. I put her hair into a ponytail and brush it back. I slipped off her pj shirt too, so she is just in her pants like me. This will avoid a huge mess.

"So first we need to put shaving cream on you like daddy, are you ready? it's a little cold," I warn her. She nods smiling. When I spray out the shaving cream she claps her hands so excited. I rub it all on her face like mine is.

"Daddy, I have saving cream on me," she laughs. I love how she says saving cream.

I give her a toothbrush and flip it so it's the back end. It's like a stick and pretend razor. "Okay Bubs first you have to get your cheeks like this," I show her and start doing my other side. She watches intently nods and then start doing it herself.

I get my phone and snap a couple pictures of Phoebe. She is so cute.

"Okay Daddy, I did my cheeks," she says.

"Okay now we do our neck," I say and show her and she does the same observing then tries it herself.

Once we finish I pay my face dry with a towel and she does the same. "Daddy, you did so good," she says and I laugh.

"So did you, my Bubs. Now it's time for a bath for you," I say because she has shaving cream everywhere.

"Will you get in with me?" She asks. Sometimes when she's sick I'll get in the tub and hold her.

"I already showered baby," I say and she nods.

"Okay will you sit with me," she asks.

"Of course I will, silly," I say and she smiles.

"I love you, Daddy," she says. This little girl has my whole heart.

(End Flashback)

"You were so good to me when I was little," I say and he smiles.

"You have always been so good to me," he says and pats my hand.

—

Right now I am on my way to see Nathan. For our anniversary he gave me a plane ticket to come watch his game. It's university of Washington against Princeton.

I am on the plane and am about to land. Sawyer is right next to me. I slept most of the flight, but now I am excited. We land in New Jersey and Sawyer drives me to Nathan's apartment.

Nathan says he has a surprise for me. I'm not sure what it could be, but I'm excited. We pull up to Nathan's apartment and I thank Sawyer. I get out and head upstairs to his place. I knock on his apartment door and he answers it. He is freshly showered and looking so hot.

"Hi baby," he says. I smile and wrap my arms around him squealing. I missed him so much.

"Oh I missed you," I say smelling his Nathan smell as we hug.

"I missed you more, Bee," he says. He grabs my bags and puts them in his room. I look around the apartment. It's a very Nathan apartment. He has one roommate named Charlie, but he's not home right now. I go into his room and smile.

He has pictures of us on his bedside table. "I love this room," I say and plop on his bed.

"Hey I made that for you," he says referring to the bed. Nathan has a habit of never making his bed. I sit up laughing.

"So what is this surprise?" I ask looking around.

"If I told you it wouldn't be a surprise," he says. I smile and shake my head standing up.

"So when do I get to know?" I ask him.

"Well when I take you to dinner I will tell you," he says.

"Wine and dining me, Mr. Moore?" I ask and he smiles.

"Only if I can get you in my bed after," he says and his hands find my butt pressing me against him. I laugh and wrap my arms around him.

"Now go shower,," he says and I shake my head. I head into his bathroom and strip. I use his body wash but my shampoo and conditioner. I think he smells amazing. I make sure I shave because well… I don't even have to say.

I get out and wrap myself in his towel. I ring out my hair and brush it out. I need to see if he has any lotion. I try to dig through his drawers, but I can't find it. I'll just ask him.

I stay in the towel and walk out to his bedroom. He's not in there so I walk out to the kitchen call out his name. All of a sudden, I see him and his roommate, Charlie.

"Jesus, Phoebe," Nathan says and comes and covers me. Not that I'm already covered by a towel.

"I didn't know you were home, Charlie. I'm sorry. Umm well I'm Phoebe," I laugh and he comes and shakes my hand.

"Well I'm going to go get dressed," I say. Nathan follows me into his room and shuts the door.

"Well your roommate got a good impression of me," I shake my head and he laughs.

"Why'd you come out babe?" He asks.

"Do you have any lotion?" I ask him. He nods and pulls it out of his bedside table cabinet.

"That's a weird place to keep lot-" then it hits me. "Ew Nathan oh my gosh," I say and he realizes what I'm saying.

"Well you don't live 5 minutes away anymore. And what do you think I do with the pictures of you with no clothes on that you send me?" He asks and I blush.

"Whatever," I laugh and rub the lotion in.

"Need any help?" He asks.

"I'm pretty capable," I smirk. He shakes his head and I head into the bathroom to do my hair and makeup.

After lots of encouragement from Nathan. Well more like we are going to be late, I get ready in about an hour. I am wearing black jeans and a black silk camisole. My hair is curled and my makeup is on.

We head to a restaurant in the city. It's very nice and has uptown vibes. We get seated by a window and handed menus.

"Are you going to get a drink?" I ask him and look over the drink menu.

"I was going to get a beer," he says and I nod.

"I may get the Southside," I say. It's a drink with gin, lemon, and mint.

"I don't know how you drink gin," Nathan says. I smile and shrug. We order our drinks both getting our IDs checked.

"I'm so glad you are here," he says.

"Aw thank you, I'm so glad I'm here too," I smile looking around.

The bartender comes and drops off our drinks after a couple minutes. I smile and cheers Nathan. "So what are we drinking to? What's the surprise?" I ask.

"Well I guess I can tell you now," he smiles.

"So as you know I have to go to med school," he says and I nod. "And I've been applying a couple of places," he says and I nod.

"I got a call two days ago, and I got into the program at Seattle Mercy with rounds at Seattle Children's," he says. I smile and put my hands over my mouth.

"So you don't have to leave Seattle? You don't have to move after college?" I ask him and he shakes his head. I stand up out of my seat and hug him. He smiles and kisses my head.

"Baby, I'm so proud of you," I say. "That's what we are getting drunk for," I say and he smiles at me. We order another round and continue talking.

I am so relieved. I thought that he was going to get an internship in another state and we would half to keep doing long distance. He starts this internship next spring after he graduates. I am so happy.

After lots of drinks, we are definitely both buzzed. Well he's buzzed I'm kind of drunk. We eat our food quickly and get the heck out of there. I grab his hand and start dragging him down the street.

"Babe you don't know where you are going," he says.

"Yes I do I saw a bar," I laugh and smiles we walk down the street to a bar called Emeralds.

We sit down at the bar and both order drinks. I get a martini and he gets another beer. "Cheers," I smile.

"Cheers to you being here," he says.

"Cheers to you getting into med school," I say. We keep drinking and way too much. Finally, we leave and take a cab home. In the back I scoot towards Nathan and lay my head on his shoulder. Maybe I drank a little too much I'm tired.

Nathan wraps an arm around me and holds me to him. I start drifting off. Soon Nathan is kissing my head and opening the door. "Come on, Bee," He says. I get out and stumble a little bit. We get into the lobby of his apartment complex and I stop.

"My shoes I need to take my shoes off," I laugh. I sit down on the floor and start unstrapping my I black heels. Nathan starts laughing. He knows it is no use to try to stop me so he bends down and takes them off. I'm finally a foot shorter than him again. He holds my heels and we walk upstairs.

When we get into his place, I drop onto his couch and start trying to sleep. "Bee, your makeup," Nathan laughs.

"Leave me," I say and he shakes his head. He goes into his room and I curl up on my side. Soon I hear footsteps and he is turning me. I feel a warm washcloth on my face. I laugh as he is smiling down at me.

"Okay my girl you are not sleeping on the couch," he says.

"But it is so comfy," I say. I am so drunk I can't move myself.

"Nope come on," He says and picks me up. He puts me on his bed and starts undoing my jeans.

"Nathan I love you but I can't have sex right now," I say.

"Bee, I don't want sex I'm getting you comfy," He says. Oh now I feel awkward. I'm in just my panties as he takes off my shirt and bra. He puts me under the covers and goes in the bathroom. I'm so cold. I curl on my side in a ball.

When Nathan comes out he is shirtless in his pajama bottoms. He takes one look at me and frowns. "Are you going to be sick?" He asks. I shake my head no.

"I'm cold," I laugh. He comes in behind me and puts his arm around me. He is so warm it helps.

"I love you Phoebe Grace," He says and kisses my head. I mumble love you too and go back to bed.

—

Today is the day that I am going to see Ava. I have a long weekend at school and am leaving now to go to San Diego. It's a 3 hour flight so not bad at all.

I am going for her birthday because she is turning 21. Which is so funny to me. Also so scary. Ava 21 will be a mess, but hopefully a good time. She has always been a partier so hopefully tonight is nothing too unusual. I am just getting off the plane and walking to the car. Sawyer is with me so he is driving. I truly don't know what I would do without him.

"Pheebs we are almost there, I will drop you off then park and continue on with my duties," He says with a wink. I smile and nod at him.

"Thanks Sawyer," I say.

When we pull up to Ava's house I smile at it. It is a little beach house and it is so nice on the outside. I go out and knock on the door. Soon two blondes open the door neither of which are Ava. "Oh my gosh you must be Phoebe," one says.

"Yeah that's me," I say.

"You are so hot what the fuck," the other one says and I laugh.

"Did you dumb asses introduce yourselves?" I hear Ava's voice. She squeals when she sees me and runs to hug me. Oh how I have missed her.

"Pheebs, Jacquelin and Nicki," she says introducing her hot blonde friends.

"Hi guys," I smile hugging them both. It makes sense that Ava is rooming with them. Not only do they look alike, they act alike too.

"So what's the plan for tonight?" I ask Ava.

"Party here, then to a bar, then to a nightclub, then back here," she says and I shake my head. This is about to be quite the night.

"So what did you bring to wear?" Ava asks.

"Um I brought these two dresses, one is red and the other is gold," I say and she smiles. I am wearing red so you should wear gold," Ava says and I nod.

"Whatever you want," I smile.

"SO how is the boy, Nicki and Jacq Phoebe has a boyfriend of what is it 5 years now?" Ava says.

"Yeah it was 5 in November," I smile.

"So you guys are getting married?" Nicki asks.

"Well I don-" I get cut off mid sentence.

"Yes they are, don't act like you don't know it Phoebe," Ava says and I shrug.

"Maybe one day," I say and smile.

"So who is this boy?" Jacquelin asks.

"His name is Nathan he is at Princeton right now, he plays on their basketball team," I say. Ava pulls up a picture and shows them. Their mouths drop open as they look to me.

"You get to sleep with… that," Nicki says. I start laughing and nod.

"Oh tell me he is good in bed," Jacquelin says and I cover my face laughing. These girls are Ava's twins.

"Oh yeah when I went on vacation with them and Tyler, all those two did was fuck. They even fucked on the plane on the way there," Ava says and I laugh.

"Oh you guys would be mile high club members," Nicki says and I shrug laughing. I guess we would be.

We all separate ways to get ready. I put on my gold cocktail dress and head out. I have my hair in a high ponytail with hoop earrings in. I have black heels on and feel very good. My dad would have a heart attack if he saw me, but what he doesn't know doesn't hurt him.

The party starts downstairs and all these California boys and girls start flooding in. A lot of Ava's sorority sisters came. She is an alpha phi and a lot of her sorority sisters are identical to her.

There is a lot of champagne, drinking, and fun going on I have had two glasses and am already feeling the effect. College has made me a light-weight. We walk out to the party bus and get a bunch of pictures. Hopefully these never come to surface because when I said my dad would go into cardiac arrest I meant it.

Ava and I entertain the entire bus with our karaoke on the way to the bar. We sing single ladies which is funny because we are both in relationships. We go into the bar and start drinking tequila sunrises. They are so good. I go up to Tyler and we send a selfie to Nathan. At this point I don't even know what we are doing. Ava and I are back up on the stage karaoking at the bar. We are having a little too much fun. I can't believe I waited this long to come visit here.

Ava comes up to me at around 2 am and says that there is a male strip club next door. I start laughing my ass off. "No way," I say and shake my head.

"Please come on, all the girls want to go," she says.

"Ava we have boyfriends," I slur drunkenly.

"Oh yeah and we are going to offend them by making fun of and watching gross male strippers," she says and I laugh.

"Come on, let's at least check it out. We can leave after two minutes," she says. I give her a skeptical look. "Pleaseeee for my 21st," she says and I roll my eyes.

"Fine two minutes," I say. She grabs my arm and drags me out of the club.

_**MARCH**_

March marks the start of one week until I see Nathan. He is coming home for his spring break and I am going home for mine too. As nice as a crazy vacation sounds, I just want a week alone with my boy. He hasn't been responding. I got home from San Diego yesterday and he hasn't texted me since then. I am assuming he is busy with exams, but still it stresses me out.

I decide to call him. Still I get no response. He should be done with basketball practice right now, so I am kind of concerned. I decide to give it a bit and go to dinner with Andrew. He picks me up at about 6 and we head out. He is driving.

"How was the Diego?" He asks using his stupid nickname for it.

"It was so much fun. It was so good to see Ava, we had a little too much fun," I laugh and he smiles.

"Oh I know, I saw the videos," he says and I give him a confused look.

"What do you mean?" I ask him.

"You guys went to a strip club, which kudos to you because those places are germ fests," he says and I laugh.

"Where did you see this video," I ask him.

"Ava's snapchat story," he says and pulls out his phone showing me. It zooms in on a partly naked male grinding on a pole then my face laughing. Shit. Fuck. Nathan.

"Oh fuck," I say. I excuse myself and rush outside. I call Nathan and leave him a voicemail.

"Okay I get it, I forgot to tell you about the strip club, but I can explain, please please please call me back," I say. Shit I fucked up.

I go back inside the restaurant and sit down. "What was that about, Grey?" He asks me.

"I might have forgotten to tell Nathan about the strip club," I say and he gives me a you fucked up look.

"Oof," he says and I nod. "I am fucked," I say.

"No you aren't, you fucked up, but this isn't that big of a deal," he says and I nod.

"Yeah I guess so," I say and he gives me a sad smile.

"You didn't cheat on him, Grey. It was a drunken mistake. You are dating a very understanding guy whether you realize it or not," he says and I nod.

"I know, I wish he would just answer his phone and let me explain," I say and Andrew nods.

"Give him time, Grey. Besides you will see him next week regardless," he says and that is a fair point.

"Yeah you are right, I am just stressed," I say.

"You guys have been dating for five years, I am sure you have gone through worse," he says and I nod. We have gone through a shit ton.

"Thank you for reasoning here with me," I say and he laughs.

"Knowing you two you will be back screwing in no time," he says and I laugh.

"Hopefully, I see him next week," I say.

"Aren't you guys doing something domestic?" He asks making me laugh.

"Yes we are, the woman I nanny for her is having her 5th child so we are watching the other four," I say and he laughs.

"Jesus you guys really should just get married. It is a waste not being married at this point," he says and laughs.

"I don't know if I would say that we both have a lot of growing up to do at this point," I smile and he shrugs.

We get our food and continue talking. We talk about his plans for this summer because he is living in Seattle. He is doing an internship with my dad's company which will be so weird. He will be working for my dad. I am excited to be able to see him over the summer though.

"So where will you be living?" I ask him.

"I got an apartment off 8th street," he says and I smile.

"So close to Ava's," I say and he shrugs.

"That has nothing to do with it," he says.

"Oh I'm sure because there are apartments right across from Grey house wouldn't have been more suitable," I say and he shrugs taking a sip of his drink.

"Whatever Grey," he says knowing I am right.

"How are you and Ava?" I ask him.

"We're good, she makes me incredibly happy," he says and I smile.

"That makes me happy," I say.

"It should, I have seen you in a happy relationship for long enough. It is my turn," he says jokingly and I laugh.

"Calm down over there," I say and he laughs.

"Oh Grey, you are the best," he says and I wink.

Today is the day Nathan comes into town. He is staying at my house because his family is out of town and locked the house without leaving him a key. Shocker. Mr. Moore is such a dick. I would never say that to Nathan but off the record he sucks. Literally sucks.

I am picking Nathan up from the airport. We haven't really been talking since the incident last week besides the logistics of him coming here, I was scared he was going to cancel the trip but luckily he didn't. I think if he gives me the time to explain we will be fine. I really thought about it and if he went to a strip club and saw topless women I would be pissed. I don't think, I know.

I got home last night and my parents and I went to a movie. It was so good we saw the Joker. I know it wasn't my mom's cup of tea, but my dad and I loved it. We also went to dinner and got to talk. My parents are going to The Maldives next week which will be fun for them. They never go on vacation just the two of them.

I am on the way to the airport now. Sawyer is talking to me about something that I am not really focused on. My brain is on Nathan. Will he hug me? Will he yell at me right then and there? What is going to happen? I am so curious to know. He usually isn't the yelling type luckily. Unless he is really mad.

I walk in and go to the terminal that his flight is coming in. I stand waiting until people start flooding out. There are lots of kids on this flight. Hopefully he got to sleep and is in a good mood. I have plans to take him to dinner tonight to one of our old favorite spots.

Finally, I see him. He looks good enough to eat in his dark pants and grey sweatshirt. He has a hat on backwards with his carry on in his hand. He is muscular and fuller now. He is no longer the high school boy who I thought was buff. I always forget that from time to time. I walk up to him maybe a little too eager and wrap my arms around him. Oh the Nathan smell. He casually wraps one arm around me and kisses my head before pulling back. Ouch.

"Hi can we talk," I say sheepishly looking up at him.

"Not here," he says and nods his head towards the exit. I nod and offer to take his carry on for him. He looks down shaking his head and gives me a small smile. My stomach flutters.

We get into the car with Sawyer and the car ride is silent. It is so uncomfortable. Sawyer takes us back to my house. Luckily my parents are working late. When we get inside, Sawyer says the usual "if you need anything you know where to find me." He leaves Nathan and I in the kitchen.

"Can I get you anything to drink," I ask awkwardly.

"No thank you," he says and I nod. I get myself down a wine glass and start pouring myself a glass of my mother's favorite white wine. I see Nathan tap his apple watch.

"Isn't it a little early for that?" He asks.

"Not with how you are acting," I say and take a large sip.

"Are you kidding me, Phoebe," he says using my full name.

"What Nathan? I haven't seen you in a month and I get a kiss on the head and a half ass hug and about four words from you," I say. "Not to mention you have barely communicated with me these past weeks," I say.

"Oh so you just turn it on me, I was fucking worried sick about you that night, Phoebe. I couldn't get a hold of you and when I get on snapchat you are at a strip club," he says. "That is bullshit and you know it," he says.

"Nathan, I was so drunk I couldn't tell you shit from shat. I didn't want to go Ava pulled the "it's my birthday" card so I went. I have no interest in those guys, after five years you should know that," I say.

"Yeah and what if I did that?" He asks.

"I would be angry Nathan I would and I fully admit that but that is why I apologized. More than once actually. I called you, texted you, fuck I even thought about flying over to see you. You can't just give me the silent treatment, we aren't in high school anymore Nathan. We need to communicate if we even have a shot at this working," I say. He looks shocked when I say that.

"So what this is it? You fuck up and we just call it quits because I'm angry," he says and now he's being just plain petuchlant.

"You are 21 years old Nathan, I fucked up you are right, but you are not handling the situation right. We aren't 16 anymore we need to talk and communicate. Grow the fuck up," I say.

"I'm supposed to grow up? You went to a fucking strip club and didn't call or text me once," he says.

"AND I APOLOGIZED," I yell. He is taken aback because I rarely raise my voice. I take a sip of my wine and rub my temples.

"Look Nathan, I am sorry, I am I fucked up and I will admit that fully, but you cannot just keep holding this against me. I will apologize over and over but there is nothing I can do. I can't go back and change what I did and I would if I could. And trust me when I saw it will never happen again," I say. He takes his hat off and runs his hands through his hair before putting it back on.

"You are right," he sighs.

"You don't have to say that," I say thinking he is just trying to end this.

"No you are, there is nothing else you can do besides apologize and not do it again," he says. I take a sip of my drink again and he stands up. He walks over to me and takes the glass out of my hand and sets it down. He pulls me to his chest and hugs me. I smile and inhale his scent against his chest. Oh how I have missed this guy.

"I'm sorry," I say.

"It's okay," he says. "I'm sorry for how I handled things," he says.

"Don't apologize," I say. He leans down and kisses my head. I smile and stand on my tippy toes while he kisses me.

"I've missed you, Bee," he says. His hands find my hips and I wrap my arms around him as we start to kiss more passionately. He lifts me and puts me on the counter so we are closer in height. I drape my arms on his shoulders as we kiss.

"Phoebe Grey," I hear and I about fly off the counter and Nathan jumps off me. The voice is coming from none other than Teddy. I smile as large as possible and run to him.

"What the hell are you doing here?" I ask him and about jump him.

"I am in Seattle taking my Bar exam," he says and I finally remember him mentioning it.

"That is this weekend?" I ask him. He nods and I finally remembered he just caught me and my boyfriend making out.

"Sorry about that," I say.

"You're lucky I am not dad," he says and I nod.

"Yeah," I say and laugh. He goes over and bro hugs Nathan after he threatens to kill him for kissing me. I laugh and roll my eyes.

"So what's on tab for tonight, kids," Ted asks.

"We are going to dinner," I say.

"Cool what time?" Teddy asks.

"I said we as in Nathan and I not you," I say and he laughs.

"Damn someone is feisty," Teddy says.

"I'll eat with you tomorrow Bear," I tell him.

"Good deal, well kids I have an exam to study for," he says and I smile waving him off.

"Okay back to what we were doing," Nathan says and winks at me. I shake my head laughing and kiss him again.

Today is the day that Nathan and I are going over to the Cruz's house. Mrs. Cruz is being induced with baby number 5. She says this is the last baby, but I could see them going for one more. Charlie is nine, Quinn is seven, Spencer is four but almost five, and Drew is two. They don't know this babies gender, but I think it is a boy. The kids all think it is a girl and Nathan thinks it is a boy.

We are switching spots with Mr. Cruz's mom and dad. We walk into the house and it is chaos, but that is nothing new. I smile as Quinn and Drew see us first. They both ran over to us. I bend down and taken both of them in my arms.

"Bee, I thought you were never coming," Quinn says dramatically.

"Bee Bee," Drew says. Charlie comes sprinting down the hallway and runs to Nathan. I laugh as Nathan hugs them. I wait for the whirlwind that is Spencer Cruz, but she never comes. I walk into the kitchen and talk to their Grandpa and he says Spencer was in time out and fell asleep. Typical.

We switch spots with the Grandparents and they leave. They have already have had dinner so we are doing playtime, bathtime, bedtime routine and then bed. Seems easier than it actually is. We take all three boys into the living room and play in the playroom. The boys are playing a board game with Nathan and I have Drew drawing with crayons with me.

I am teaching him the shapes. I feel someone staring and look over to see Nathan. When our eyes meet he smiles at me. I love this boy so much. "Bee you look old," Charlie says and I look over laughing.

"What do you mean Mister?" I ask him.

"You don't look littler anymore duh," Quinn says and Nathan and I both start laughing. These kiddos are so stinking funny.

Drew says that he is thirsty so I pick him up and take him in the kitchen. I set him on the counter and put my hands on either side of him. "What are you thirsty for milk or water?" I ask him I squeeze his belly and he laughs.

"Uhm I fink I firsty fo milk," he says and I smile. I kiss his cheeks and he laughs. "Yuck Bee," he says and I laugh. I get him a sippy cup of milk and hand it to him. He rests his head on my shoulder when I pick him up.

"You are so stinking cute," I tell him as I take him in the playroom. I walk in and sit on the couch holding him. He is the snuggliest guy.

"You got three, Nathan," Quinn tells him.

"Okay, one… two… three," he says and moves his piece over three. I love watching him play with the boys. He gets so into it and it is so cute.

All of a sudden at the door we hear steps. Spencer is standing there with her blanket in her hand and hair in pigtails she looks precious. She is in a little leopard jumpsuit with a black long sleeve shirt under it.

"Hi girly girl, where is my hug?" I ask her and move Drew to my side. She runs over and hugs me tightly.

"Bee, I didn't know you were coming to my house," she says and I laugh. "Well I am here you crazy girl," I say.

"Spencer Cruz," Nathan says and she laughs running over to Nathan hugging him tightly.

"Can I play this game, I love it," Spencer says.

"Noooooooooo Spencer will mess it up," Quinn says.

"Hey be nice, Spence is allowed to play," I say and eye Quinn.

"UH fine," he says and scoots over giving her a piece and some cards. I know she has no clue how to play, but it will lead to a bigger tantrum if she can't.

"Okay, Spencer you got eight," Charlie says.

"Move your piece eight spaces toward the yellow candy," Nathan coaches her.

"One… two… three… four… five… seven… eight," she says and the boys both start laughing.

"Spencer you forgot eight," they say making fun of her. I can see Spencer getting upset.

"I don't want to play," she says and throws her piece going over to the drawing table.

"Boys you need to apologize," Nathan and I both say. I smirk at him.

"Sorry Spencer," they both say and she doesn't look over. I know her feelings are hurt. Her older brothers are like celebrities to her. When they are mean to her it crushes her.

"Okay Nathan you got four," Charlie says.

"One, two, what comes next again?" Nathan asks. The boys look dumbfounded. I smile and look to Spencer peeking over.

"Three duh," Quinn says.

"Oh yeah, three then um," Nathan says. Both the boys mouths are hanging open. I smile as Spencer has the biggest grin on her face. Nathan is so good to this kids.

I check my watch and realize we need to get them into baths. I gather the troops and get them upstairs. The boys take a shower together in the master bathroom. Nathan made sure they got in alright and I take the little ones in the bathtub. I strip Spence then lift her into the bath tube. Nathan filled it with bubbles and she is loving it. I then strip Drew and lift him into the bath. He giggles as he splashes the water.

I sit on my knees and wash Spence's hair as Drew plays with his water toys. "Bee can we see Mr. Chwistian tonight," Spencer asks.

"Spence, it's pretty late girly girl, that might have to wait for another night," I say and she frowns. I sigh. This girl has had a rough day. I wash Drew as Nathan walks in and kneels next to me.

"Boys get in okay?" I ask and he nods.

"Yep, only one fight about who got to stand closest to the water," he says and I laugh.

"I'm sure you handled it like a pro," I say and he winks.

After the kiddos are done in the bath, I lift Spencer out first and Nathan wraps her like a burrito in a towel. She is hysterical laughing as he does it then lifts her up. She is going to have the hiccups after this. Then I lift Drew out and wrap him in his duck towel. I pick him up and take him to his room. I put his nighttime pull up on him and get him into his racecar jammies.

"Nate are you good with those three while I put him to bed?" I yell out to Nathan.

"Yeah I got it," he says and I shut the door to Drew's room.

I pick him up and sit with him on the rocking chair. He picked out his favorite book. I remember when I would do this with Spencer. They are getting so big so fast.

"If you give a mouse a cookie," I start reading to him. He giggles and wraps his hand around my hair as I read. By the end he is fast asleep on my chest. I pick him up and set him in his crib. I turn on his sound machine and sneak out of the room.

"I walk into to the boys room and see that Quinn is already asleep. I sit on Charlie's bed and listen to him as he reads to me. He reads a chapter of the magic tree house. After that he gives me a hug and lays down in bed. The boys are self sufficient enough now where they don't have to be coddled to sleep.

I walk to Spencer's room and know this is where the challenge will lie. I walk into her in her ladybug pajamas and Nathan holding her. They are by the window and Nathan is swaying side to side. "What's going on?" I ask them.

"I miss my mommy and daddy," Spencer says. "I want them to come home," she says and starts to cry.

"Oh Spence, remember mommy and daddy are at the hospital getting your new little brother or sister," I say.

"I don't want a new one," she says and I bite my lip.

"Yes you do Spence, you'll get to teach them all the stuff you know," I say.

"Like the baby shark song," she asks. I watch Nathan try not to laugh.

"Yep, the baby shark song and the bubblegum song," I say and she nods. I motion for Nathan to lay her down on her bed. Nathan and I sit on either side of her as she lays down.

"My mommy and daddy sit with me when I can't sleep," she says looking at us. "Just like you guys," she says and I smile.

"No way," I say.

"Do you and Nate kiss like mommy and daddy?" she asks. I about choke on my words and look to Nathan. He can answer this one.

"Uhm well Spence, Bee and I we um… we hug a lot," Nathan says and I laugh but turn my head to hide it.

"Oh okay," she says and accepts the answer.

"Why don't you try to sleep," I say and she closes her eyes. Nathan rubs her back as she tries to go to bed. After a couple of minutes, she is asleep.

Nathan and I walk into the room that we are staying in. I sprawl on the bed and Nathan laughs. He crawls into bed next to me and wraps his arms around me. I rest in his shoulder.

"Do you have to go back to New Jersey?" I ask. "I am done with long distance," I say and he smiles kissing my head.

"Oh Pheebs, I am too baby," he says.

"One more year," he says and I nod. I end up falling asleep. Nathan falls asleep too and we are left cuddling asleep.

At around 6 am I feel someone crawling up between Nathan and me. I assume it is Nathan shifting so I stay asleep. All of a sudden Nathan groans and I look over. Spencer has nudged her way between us.

"Spence what are you doing?" I ask her.

"I done sleeping," she says and I laugh. I pick her up and take her downstairs. I let Nathan sleep in. He doesn't do that very often.

I get downstairs and get Drew on the way and start making pancakes. I have a text from Mrs. Cruz that says come whenever. I have their big car so I can take all the kids with Nathan. The boys come down shortly after. I turn on the TV and get all of them eating and watching cartoons.

I am washing the dishes and feel someone put their hands on my hips. Nathan. "Why didn't you wake me?" he says as he kisses my neck.

"You looked so peaceful," I smile.

After breakfast and getting the kids dressed which took an hour we head to the hospital. I have Drew in his stroller. Nathan is holding Spence and the boys are trailing in front of us. We all get our badges and head up to the 6th floor. We knock and walk in. Drew hops out of his stroller and runs to Mr. Cruz and all the other kids run to Mrs. Cruz who is holding a newborn in wrapped in a white blanket and white hat.

"It's a boy," Spencer yells.

"Shhhh Spence, how do you know its a boy?" Mrs. Cruz asks her.

"Duh no pink," I look to Nathan and smirk.

"Well guys meet your baby sister, this is Blakely Mae Cruz, but we are going to call her Blake," Mrs. Cruz says. I smile at how precious the scene in front of me is. NAthan and I each get to hold her before we leave.

We walk out of the hospital holding hands and get into the car together. I take a deep breath and look to Nathan.

"We are going to be good, Pheebs," he says and I nod. We are.

**(Hi all. Me again. It still has been pretty rough around here. Things are slowly and I mean SLOWLY started to get better. I know this is shorter than what we are used to, but I can't push myself right now. I am starting to think about doing a long senior year recap instead of a chapter like this. That way I can get onto the exciting real world of Phoebe Grey. Let me know what y'all think about that. I think it will be easier for me to get those chapters out quicker and more frequently not only because they aren't 13000+ words, but because I will have more motivation to get them out. Enjoy this chapter and leave me some love. THANK YOU GUYS FOR YOUR LOVE AND SUPPORT XOXOXO) **


	7. Chapter 7

**Chapter 7**

**(Y'all this is it. This is Phoebe's college experience. I hope you all enjoy this chapter. I did it so it is going from the present (May of senior year and her graduation) to flashbacks throughout her senior year. Next will be real life for Phoebe. Meaning work and the stressors of real life. Don't we know it. Thank y'all for reading. You guys have been such a light in my life. XOXO) **

**(For those asking for my pinterest my username on it is Greyfamily6179. If you type that in you have to switch the search from all pins to people. If you need more help PM me!) **

**SENIOR YEAR RECAP **

"Phoebe Grace Grey," The dean of my college says as I walk across the stage to get my diploma. Phoebe Grey Child Psychologist. They said hold the clapping till the end, but I picture my dad clapping his hands and my mom grabbing his arm telling him to quiet down.

I take my diploma, smile for the picture with my dean, and finish my walk across the stage. Man four years of hell for that. I'm kidding. Kind of. I have a bachelor's degree in Child Psychology. It is crazy to say I even have a degree in anything. I think back to this past year. What a year it was.

(Flashback Phoebe - September of senior year)

"We made it bitches," I yell to Kendra, Maisy, and Olivia as we all take a shot of tequila in our new house. The house that we are doing to live in for this entire year.

"WOOOOO," Maisy yells as she does another shot by herself.

"Can you believe we are fucking seniors?" Kendra asks. I shake my head no.

"I feel like a washed up senior already this tequila is going to my head," Liv says and I nod agreeing with her.

"Same girl," I say and she laughs.

"I could down a bottle of this and not have a problem," Maisy says.

"That's called alcoholism," Olivia butts in and we all laugh.

"Okay so are we going to the bars tonight?" Maisy asks.

"Fuck yeah we are," Kendra says.

"Shit okay," I say and take another shot. We order a cab and head to Emerald. It is one of the best bars in town.

When we get there the party has already started. They have a DJ and lots of dancing. It is more of a club than a bar. We get drinks and down them before heading to the dance floor. We all dance together and it is only a matter of time before creepy guys come up and start trying to grind on us.

"Get the fuck off me," I hear Maisy say. I turn and see a guy with his hands on her hips.

"Don't touch her," Kendra says.

"Oh baby she wants it," he yells over the music. All of a sudden Olivia walks over and slaps the guy across the face. I am surprised the music didn't shut off like in the movies. I cover my open mouth. The guy lets go of Mase and runs off.

I start laughing and we all run and hug Olivia. "Holy shit," I say and she smiles.

"Hey it's senior year bitches, no one can fuck with us," she says and I laugh. These girls are my people.

(End of flashback)

"You may now move your tassels," Dean Williams says. We are all standing and move our Tassels from right to left. We throw our hats up and start moving out of the auditorium. So that is it? I am a big girl now?

I am supposed to get a job now. Well technically I already have one I just haven't told anyone yet. I am scared to tell people. What if my parents don't approve or Nathan gets a job out of Seattle. I know it will last short term, but long term?

It scares me. Now I am starting to wish that Iam back in my college days. Is this adulting? I haven't even step foot out of the auditorium.

(Flashback Phoebe - October of senior year)

I am applying for jobs. This is fucking crazy. I am sitting across from an advisor building my resume to apply for a job. I am writing down my work experience, my transcript, and basically everything that makes me, me.

I have a list of Children's hospitals that I am applying to. My number one right now is Seattle Children's. They are in need of a new psychologist on their burn/ortho/trauma and GI floor. I know I could do that and be very good at it.

The other hospitals I am applying to are Bellevue Children's, Portland Children's, Vancouver Children's, and Children's Hospital of Los Angeles. No one knows about that one yet. They had an open spot and I know it's far from home, but I'm in a competitive field. It is not that I am never going to be back home.

The girl I am working with goes over my resume and critiques it. We work back and forth until finally we both can't find any errors. I am going to send it to my mom one last time before actually sending it off. I need a drink after this.

I call Nathan on the way home. He answers after the first ring. "Hey Bee," he says. Oh what I would do to just hug him right now.

"Hey baby," I smile.

"To what do I owe the pleasure?" He asks.

"Oh just checking in on you, I just finished doing my resume with my advisor. How are you?" I ask him.

"Same old same old. School is getting pretty tough to prepare for my internship at Mercy," he says.

"Oh I am sorry baby," I say.

"You know hearing your voice helps," he says.

"Does it now? Maybe I should just keep you on the phone forever," I say and he laughs.

"Oh baby, if I could, I would," he says.

"I miss you," I say.

"I miss you more, Pheebs," he says and I smile.

Oh this boy of mine.

(End of Flashback)

I walk out to my parents, Nathan, and Teddy who are standing waiting for me. My dad is the first person to come embrace me. "I am so proud of you, Bubs. You are going to change this world," he says and kisses my head.

"I always knew you could do it," my mom says teary eyed. I hug her tightly then go to Teddy. He is practicing law and took over my grandpa's old firm. He is so busy, I am not even sure how he made it here.

"I am proud of you, Bubs" Teddy says and I thank him. I then go to Nathan who hugs me tightly. He graduated a month ago and I am so proud of him. He starts medical school next week. Just in time to watch me graduate.

"Oh Bee, you continue to amaze me everyday, baby," he says and leans down kissing my head. We then head outside the auditorium.

My mom insists on taking a million pictures. I get some with my mom, my dad, my mom and dad, Teddy, my mom, dad, and Teddy, and Nathan. It is quite the ordeal, but my mom says they are

good memories to have and I can't argue there.

(Flashback Phoebe - November of senior year)

"Happy 6 year anniversary," I say to Nathan as he wraps his arms around me.

"Happy anniversary baby," Nathan says and kisses me. We are going away for the weekend.

Remember that cabin in Ellensburg, Washington that my parents never let me and Nathan go to with Ava and Tyler? Yeah we're going there. My dad was not too fond of the idea, but Sawyer will be there. And Stella the Gail of the cabin.

We are driving there now. Sawyer is following us. Nathan has his hand on my thigh and the other on my wheel. His thumb rubs back and forth and if I said my panties weren't damp I would be lying. He just has these big muscular arms and strong hands and whew I need to get my head out of the gutter.

We pull up to the cabin and I smile. It is absolutely stunning here. I walk out and look around. Nathan comes around and takes my hand leading me inside.

"Okay guys I'll be in the security wing if you need me, you guys are 22 now so I'm not planning on watching over your every move. Just text me if you want to leave," Sawyer says and I thank him.

"Let's go put our stuff upstairs," Nathan says and I nod. He insists on carrying my bag upstairs. We get up there to the master bedroom and it's beautiful. I sit on the bed and Nathan comes to sit next to me.

"This is beautiful," Nathan says and I smile nodding. I turn to face him. I put my hand on his cheek and start kissing him. He puts his hand on the small of my back and guides to laying down position. He stops and takes off his shirt. I smile and let my eyes roam.

Nathan moves and kneels on the ground at the end of the bed. I have a feeling I know what's coming when he grabs me just under my knees and pulls me so that my legs are bent and my heels are at the end of the bed.

"Can I take these off?" He asks talking about my jeans. I bite my lip nodding. He does and throws them on the floor repositioning my legs.

"Oh baby you're already ready," he says and I blush as his thumb traces over the damp spot on my panties.

Nathan starts kissing my thighs starting by my knees and going down. He kisses the wet spot and looks at me. "When did you get this?" He asks tracing his thumb over the spot. He doesn't actually expect me to tell him. I blush and cover my face.

"Hey no hiding," he says and I feel his hot breath against my thigh.

"When you were rubbing my thigh in the car," I say and he smirks. He pulls my panties over and eases a long finger into me.

"Yeah? Tell me more," he says as he starts pumping his finger.

"Fuck," I arch my back. He stops and I look at him.

"That's not telling me about it," he smirks and stops fingering me.

"You're arms turn me on," I yell so he just won't stop. He smirks and finally goes down right where I want him. This boy has such a capability to turn me on.

(End flashback)

I am going to dinner with my family and Nathan tonight. We are going to a nice restaurant in Vancouver. I'm so excited to have them all around me.

"How does it feel to graduate?" My dad asks as he kisses my head while we walk to the car.

"It feels… weird actually," I say and he nods.

"I'm sure it does, I am so proud of you Bubs. I always knew you could do it," he says and I smile.

"Thank you, Dad," I say and hug him.

We get into the car and head over. I have one my white graduation dress that has bell sleeves and a tie around the waist. It is so cute. Ava helped me pick it out. I wish she could be here, but this is her exam week.

We get to the restaurant and get seated. This is the dinner that I am planning on telling everyone about my job at Seattle Children's. I am scared how everyone is going to react. Let's get drinks first.

My dad orders three bottles of Bollinger. Some family tradition in graduations. He even let me have a glass when Teddy graduated with his bachelors and I wasn't 21 yet. I think everyone at the table had a stroke when he handed me the small glass.

"Cheers to Bubs… Phoebe we are all so proud of you. You are the light that your field needs. We can't wait to watch you continue to grow," he says. I smile and we all clink glasses. I mouth thank you across the table.

After a couple of drinks, I decided it is time. I need to tell them that I start work next month. I clear my throat and everyone looks to me. "Oh wow, okay so," I laugh and take another sip. Everyone looks confused.

"Well, as you all know I have been applying to various children's hospitals on this side of the country," I smile and wink to my dad.

"And just a couple weeks ago I got a call back from one of them and they offered me a job," I say. I look to Nathan who looks confused. Probably as to why this is the first he is hearing about this.

"I'm Seattle Children's newest burn/ortho/trauma psychologist," I say. My mom covers her mouth and smiles. Teddy starts clapping and is the first to come wrap me in his arms. I laugh and hug him.

"Those kiddos are so lucky, Pheebs," he says and I smile thanking him. My mom is the next. She is crying as she hugs me.

"You just continue to amaze me, Phoebe girl," she says and I hug her tightly.

"Thank you momma," I say and hug her.

"Child psychologist, Phoebe Grey. Maybe I'll be seeing you around there," Nathan winks. I laugh and hug him tightly. He does rounds at Seattle Children's to get his pediatric experience.

"I'll see you Dr. Moore," I say as he kisses me. Then my dad is standing there. I can't read his expression.

"You got a job? Already? When do you start?" He asks.

"May 23rd" I say and he nods.

"You never stop," he says and I laugh. He smiles and wraps me in his arms.

"Does this mean you aren't leaving the state?" He asks hopeful.

"Yes it does," I laugh. He holds a fist up pumping it. He was not happy with the thought of me leaving Washington. We hug tightly and he kisses my head.

"Well now we have to celebrate," my dad says and orders another bottle of champagne.

(Phoebe flashback - December)

"Where is he?" I ask. I am drunk and at the final frat fest before the holidays. It's Andrew's frat and he brought me, so I am looking around for him.

"I don't know, I haven't seen TJ either," Olivia laughs. Her big is here so she has been with her.

"Shit I need him to walk me home," I laugh and she shakes her head.

"Well let me know if you have seen Teej," she says using her nickname for him.

I walk upstairs to the frat and start looking in the rooms. It smells kind of like pee and old spice up here. Finally I hear people in a room so I open the door. Oh shit it's a couple hooking up. I go to close the door until I see who it is.

Haley Berber and Tj. Oh fuck. My stomach drops. How am I supposed to deal with this. I quickly shut the door and start making my way downstairs until I get yanked to the side.

"Grey, Grey, it wasn't what it looked like," TJ says. It takes everything out of me not to slap him.

"It's exactly what it fucking looked like don't lie to me TJ," I say.

"Please please just don't tell Liv," he says. Is he alright in the head.

"You either tell her or I do," I say. He runs his hand through his hair and sighs.

"Grey, this isn't your place," he starts to raise his voice.

"Like fuck it's not, she's my best friend," I say.

"And my girlfriend," he says back.

"That you cheated on," I say and sighs before punching the wall right next to my head. I jump out of the way.

"Phoebe," I hear Andrews voice before he tackles TJ. Andrew thought TJ punched me. Shit they are fist fighting. I jump down and try to pry andrew off.

"Andrew, Andrew stop," I yell until more guys come break them apart. Olivia comes running over to him and looks at his bloody nose.

"Andrew what the fuck," Olivia yells. Shit I have to tell her.

"You, you, and you outside now," I scream. They look at me. I'm pissed. Everyone is so immature here. What the fuck is going on.

When we get outside Olivia starts asking a million questions a minute. "No stop, TJ take it away," I say crossing my arms. Andrew has his arm around me.

"Fuck you, Grey," he says. Andrew opens his mouth and I shake my head.

"You tell her or I am," I say.

"Tell me what?" Olivia asks.

"Baby, Phoebe walked in on what she thought was me cheating on you," Olivia looks at me. And I shake my head.

"Yeah I must have been confused since you and Haley were both ass naked," I say and he flicks me off.

"Is this true," Olivia asks tears running down her face.

"Baby it wasn't what it looked like," he said and I shake my head.

"Phoebe and Andrew will you walk me home?" She asks.

"Baby, Liv stop. Come on," he says. She comes over hugging me. Andrew takes us both and we start walking. What a night.

(End flashback)

We've had 4 champagne bottles between the 5 of us. I think everyone is buzzed. Even my dad who I think have seen buzzed maybe once in my life. Nathan has his arm around the back of my chair.

"We should go to the hotel bar," I say. Teddy and my parents are at a hotel across the street. The Heathman.

"Bubs," my dad starts to say no and my mom puts her hand on his chest.

"Come on Christian she only graduates college once, and she's 22," she says.

"One drink," my dad says and I take Nathan's hand as we stand up. Teddy is drunk and I love it. We are laughing about when he hooked up with my big. Then dated her.

We get to the bar and all sit down at a round table. Teddy, Nathan, and my dad get a beer. My mom gets a cosmopolitan, and I decide to get a lemon drop martini.

"To Pheebs," Nathan says as we all clink glasses. I laugh and sip my drink.

One thing leads to another and my dad and I are dancing to The Rolling Stones. I am cracking up laughing as he spins me around. My mom has her phone out recording in one hand and her drink in the other. We look like quite the fools here.

I love this little family of mine. We are all going to be hungover tomorrow, but these memories will be with me forever.

(Phoebe Flashback - January of senior year)

I finished my last round of finals before winter break. Ever. So weird to say. I honestly don't like it. Although I am very excited to make a career out of psychology. Today I am going to a benefit for my dad's company. Unfortunately, winter break did not end soon enough so I got roped into going.

I am wearing a nude gown that has black beaded detail all over it. It is off the shoulder, long sleeve, and tight fitted until about my hips then it flows down to the ground. It is a beautiful dress. My mom and I picked it out two days before the gala because I liked nothing.

Nathan is my date of course. He is on his way to our house as my mom and I drink a glass of white wine together at the table. My dad walks into the kitchen and looks at my mom.

"Should you guys be drinking?" My dad asks. I smirk and take a sip.

"Absolutely," I say and pour him a glass handing it to him. He shakes his head putting the glass down.

"Girls, I mean it. No getting wasted," he says eyeing me.

"It'll be hard not to when mike Crossley comes up and hits on me, but I'll try," I say and just as my dad is about to yell at me for that Nathan walks in the house.

"Hey," I smile as he comes over and kisses my head.

"You look absolutely stunning," he says and I blush. He shakes my dad's hand and kisses my mom's cheek.

We head out after we finish our glass of wine. Nathan and I are in the back seat. He has his arm wrapped around me and his fingers are tracing my shoulder. Oh how I love this boy.

We get out at the venue. There are so many people I can already tell. We get out and Nathan keeps his hand at the small of my back. We walk into the decorated venue and get glasses of champagne.

"Cheers to us baby," I say and he smiles. We walk further into the party and see my aunt Mia.

"Phoebe Grey. You look stunning," she says and I laugh shaking my head.

"You are too much," I say and laugh. We hug each other tightly.

After we go over and see Ava. Andrew is here with her tonight. I give andrew the biggest hug and then Ava. She looks absolutely stunning tonight.

"Well shit how are you guys?" Ava says.

"Were okay, how are you two?" I ask and they blush looking at each other.

"We just hooked up in the boathouse," she says.

"You what? As in the boathouse my parents got engaged in?" I ask.

"yeah it's a right of passage," she winks. "the boathouse in the back. The side door is unlocked and no one is down there," she says and winks at me. I laugh shaking my head.

It is called that dinner is served. I am sitting with Ava, Nathan, and Andrew. There are so many speakers here, it's a snooze fest. Nathan's hand finds its way to my thigh. He leans into me and says "why don't we go find that boathouse," in my ear. I blush and look at andrew and Ava who are not paying attention.

"Someone will know," I say.

"Who?" He asks and I look around. He's right no one will. I blush looking down.

"If I don't get you out of this dress soon I'll have to go take care of myself," he says and I laugh looking at him. I stand up smoothing my dress out and he takes my hand. We sneak out the back.

"Nathan slow down," I laugh as he is about running to the boathouse. Finally we get there and we sneak inside. I smile as he shuts the door and turns ripping off his tie and unbuttoning his pants.

He grabs me and turns me against the wall. Forceful Nathan is so hot. I am panting as he unzips my dress and slides it off me. I'm left in my black thong.

"Holy shit," he says and turns me around so we are face to face and I'm against the wall. He pulls down his boxers and slides my underwear to the side as he picks me up and slides into me.

"Ahhhh," I grip his hair in my hand. Thrusts into me so hard. I kiss his neck as we have sex.

"Fuck Phoebe, come for me," he says and starts going faster.

It doesn't take long for him to make me come and him to come right with me. We help each other get dressed and return to the party.

Oh my gosh this boy.

(End flashback)

We head to bed after dinner, drinks and dancing. I think everyone at this point is drunk and ready for sleep. I stay with Nathan in his hotel room much to my parents disliking. But at this point I'm 22. Not much they can say. They were married by this point in my moms life.

Nathan is in the shower as I lay in the king sized bed. I am on my side in just my panties I am drifting to sleep as I hear the shower turn off. After a couple of minutes, I feel the bed dip.

Freshly showered Nathan pulls me to him so my back is to his chest. He smells so good. "Goodnight," I murmur.

"Goodnight Bee, I'm so proud of you," he says and I smile. I fall asleep with his hand around my waist.

When I wake up Nathan isn't in bed. I sit up and stretch putting on his dress shirt he had on and buttoning it. When I walk out he has breakfast on the table. I smile as I see him reading his book.

"Morning," I smile.

"Good morning, sleepy head," he says and I sit down next to him. He makes me a plate of pancakes, bacon, and eggs. I'm starving so I dig in.

"How did you sleep?" He asks me.

"I slept amazing, I always sleep better with you," I say and hold out a piece of bacon for him to bite.

"Yeah? I think I sleep better with you," he says. "Speaking of, what are your living plans this year?" He asks.

"I'm living in Escala," I say and he smiles.

"Is that what you decided," he asks.

"Yeah my parents already own in, that way I can not have to worry about finding a place," I say and he smiles.

"Are you going to phoebify it?" He asks talking about decoration.

"I've already started," I laugh. I really have I am working with Ava on it. She has been helping me with her friend Kelly to decorate it.

"Show me," he says and I pull up pictures on my phone. I've basically taken the whole place and lightened it up. The floors are a lighter marble. The couches are white and light greys. I've replaced the dark walls with light grey. It is so much happier and brighter.

"You did this?" He asks.

"Well I had a little help," I smirk. He laughs and kisses my head.

"Eat that," he points to my half eaten pancake.

"I'm stuffed," I say and put my hands on my belly.

"Fine," he says and clears the plates.

"So what's your living situation this year. You'll have to be close to Mercy won't you?" I ask him and he nods.

"I got an apartment," he says and I nod.

"Where?" I ask.

"Crystal line," he says and I look at him.

"Meaning the ones down the street from escala?" I ask.

"Don't be mad," he says.

"Babe why would I be mad, that's great," I smile and walk over gripping his cheeks kissing him.

"Mmmm I wish we were just living together," he says and I smile.

"In due time," I say and kiss him again.

(Phoebe February flashback)

Three months till graduation, three months till graduation, three months till graduation. I repeat the mantra in my head over and over again.

I am so stressed out. I have two exams and a paper due all this week. And trust me I know this is nothing new. Already got that lecture.

"But Phoebe you're a senior in college expect this kind of stress," my dad said.

Yeah I know I am and I also know that it doesn't make me feel better when he says that. I am in the coffee shop doing my flash cards and breaking when I get sudden inspiration for my essay.

These past couple weeks I have been living off 7 cups of coffee and 2 hours of sleep. I've been doing well on all my assignments and tests. But I can see that I am about to crash.

I go up and order my 6th coffee and as I go to pay for it someone behind me steps in. "I got it," I turn to see a guy paying for my coffee.

"Oh no thank you," I say and he shakes his head saying he insists. I've simply never seen this guy in my life. He pays and I turn thanking him.

He is pretty attractive. Nothing compared to Nathan, but he's cute. He is tall with brown hair. He has piercing blue eyes. I am still confused as to why he paid for my coffee.

"My dad always said to never let a pretty girl buy her own coffee," he said and I internally cringe. Oh god he is hitting on me.

"Oh thank you," I say with a laugh.

"I'm Max," he says and we shake hands.

"Phoebe," I say and he smiles.

"So what year are you?" He asks.

"Senior," I say and he nods.

"I'm a junior, business" he says and I smile. The barista hands me my coffee and I thank him again before going to put sugar in it.

"So what's your major?" He asks me. Oh he's not letting me go.

"Psychology," I say as I put the lid back on.

"Nice," he says and I smile. I go to sit at my table and to my surprise he sits himself down right across from me.

"What are you doing?" He asks.

"I have two exams this week and a paper due tomorrow," I say and he nods.

"What's the paper On?" He asks not taking the hint to leave my table.

"Child developmental tasks," I say and he nods.

"Cool, I had a paper on Christian Grey's business plan," he says and suddenly the entire deal makes sense. He knows I'm Phoebe Grey and my dads internship applications just got turned in for the fall semester. I'm not entertaining this one.

"That's nice," I say taking a sip of my coffee.

"You know he has the internship coming up," he says and I nod. What is this kid trying to do?

"So what's your last name?" He asks and finally I break down laughing.

"You know my last name and buying my coffee is not going to get you that internship. While I appreciate the gesture and the company, I would suggest hard work which is what I'm trying to do if you would excuse me," I say and he looks at me baffled.

"I um I am sorry," he says and gets up practically running away.

We really are surrounded by idiots.

(End flashback)

I said goodbye to WSU. It is so weird that I am not coming back here next fall. This has been my home for four years. I guess it is time to move onto bigger things. It will always be here if I want to come back.

I am in the car on my way back to Seattle with my dad and Nathan. My mom and Teddy are in the car behind us.

"So how does it feel to graduate?" My dad asks.

"Pretty good, I guess," I say.

"You guess? You just worked your ass off for four years," my dad says and I laugh.

"I know I'll miss the place," I say and he nods.

"Understandable, what about you Nathan? Do you miss New Jersey?" My dad asks.

"I missed Seattle more," he says and my dad smiles at me. I love this boy.

We get home around 7 pm. I am starving and about to eat my own hand off. Gail is off on Sunday's. We walk into the house and I go to the food closet.

"You hungry, Pheebs?" Nathan asks.

"Starving," I say and he looks around the food pantry.

"Lets go to dinner," he says and I smile.

"Okay," I say.

"Go get dressed, let's go to the bistro," he says and I smile. I love this boy.

(March flashback)

Senior spring break is in full swing. I am drinking a mojito out of a coconut watching Maisy make out with a random lifeguard. We are in Cancun. I am on my fifth drink and Olivia is in the ocean.

I have a nice tan and sand all over my body. We got two suites courtesy of Christian Grey. I am in one with Olivia and Maisy and Kendra are in the other.

"Let's go shower and get ready for dinner," Maisy says wiping her lips of the lifeguard.

"You are a little hoe," Kendra says and we all laugh.

"Liv let's go," I say calling for her to come on.

We go into the room and I get into the shower. After slipping once I decide to sit and wash my body and hair. I am so excited for tonight. We are going to a karaoke bar. It should be very interesting.

I put my hair in a high ponytail and put on my two piece set. It's a crop top and skirt. Definitely nothing my dad would approve of. Honestly Nathan wouldn't either. The top ties in the front and the skirt is pretty short. It's so cute though.

Liv and I meet up with Maisy and Kendra at the bar. We get a table and all order drinks. I get a margarita and we get an appetizer of flatbread and avocado bruschetta. I am starving so I am excited.

We all get our drinks and take pictures before the karaoke starts. The first person to go is an old man who sings Witchcraft. It is so cute and he is so good.

After a couple of more drinks and performers Kendra and Maisy decide it is their turn. They decide on singing glamorous by Fergie. I am about on the floor rolling watching them not only sing but try to read the lyrics.

They are such nutcases and the people around us are all staring. It is so funny. Everyone in the bar has their mouths hanging open.

After they finish there is a round of slow claps. Maisy spectacularly falls right on her face trying to get off the stage. Jesus she knows how to make a scene.

After a bloody nose, three performances, and God knows how many margaritas we are back in our hotel room. I am nursing a gallon of water, coke, and an order of chicken fingers and french fries courtesy of Nathan calling the hotel and ordering them to my room.

This spring break has been quite the shit show though I can't complain. It has been so much fun.

(end flashback)

Nathan and I are at the Bistro sharing an appetizer of calamari. We are seated by a window and I am chowing I was so hungry.

"You know we are coming up on seven years of dating?" Nathan asks. I nod and shake my head.

"I mean it is so crazy," I say and he nods.

"Most people are married by now," he says and I smile nodding. Where is he going with this?

"Yeah they are," I say and he sighs leaning forward on the table.

"You know we haven't talked about that," he says and my stomach starts doing flips on flips.

"Talked about what?" I ask him wanting to be sure.

"Marriage," he says and I choke on my water. I cover my mouth coughing.

"Tell me how you really feel," he says and I laugh.

"Marriage Nathan?" I ask.

"I mean Babe, I will be 23 in two months and you in a couple more. We have been dating for almost seven years. My parents were married by 22. I am not saying we go to Vegas now, but you know I would like to know your two cents on it," he says and I nod clearing my throat.

"I mean obviously I want to marry you. That is the plan if you are down for it," I laugh. "But you are still in school and I just landed my first job. We have so much growing to do," I say and he nods.

"I have three more years of school, and you did just get your first job, but I want you to be mine sooner rather than later," he says and I smile.

"I already am yours," I say and he laughs taking my hand. He brushes his finger over my ring finger.

"You know what I mean" he says and I nod.

"I will always be yours," I say and he leans over kissing me.

"Let's put a pin in this conversation can we?" I ask and he nods smiling.

**(Y'all this is it. This is Phoebe's college experience. I hope you all enjoy this chapter. I did it so it is going from the present (May of senior year and her graduation) to flashbacks throughout her senior year. Next will be real life for Phoebe. Meaning work and the stressors of real life. Don't we know it. Thank y'all for reading. You guys have been such a light in my life. XOXO) **

**(For those asking for my pinterest my username on it is Greyfamily6179. If you type that in you have to switch the search from all pins to people. If you need more help PM me!) **


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